Al/ck/

I did, I checked into a detox for 4 days. It was a good detox because they gave me only 2 pills at the height of my withdrawals and nothing more. I spent most of the time there talking and "learning" with other people. I went back to drinking a month later.

/pol/ is full of young normies who think they are edgy LARPing as Jew hating Nazis. I woudn't recommend it as a place for evaluating your life.

Not for me at least.
When I get drunk, I'll have like half bottle of something and go to bed around when the brownouts start.

When I'm full on it, I'll do that one night then not the next. The problem is that even that "little" is hurting my life. I want to stop. Eventually.

I fucking know dude, I explained why I was there because there was a thread about this kind of stuff there and I wanted a new viewpoint. I've drank heavily for 9 years with the last 3 being alcohol. I've been to AA 3 times a week for 6 weeks, outpatient program, looked at a whole bunch of post necrotic livers on the internet, watched all the alcoholic docs I can. I just wanted to see what they would say to me.

>tfw trying not to drink tonight
It's only 9 o'clock and I'm so fucking bored. My headset is broke so I can't even vidja. I've been unemployed for a week because I fell for the Engineering meme and all the jobs here dried up, and I don't want to move away from my family. I'm really tempted to crack a beer.

This is my problem.
Eternal fucking boredom

I don't even want to play video games anymore. But I think I'm going to force myself to
It passes the time until I can sleep

> don't rinse out piss pot for seven months, just empty when full
> leave house for 20 minutes
> re-enter room
>eyes begin to water, throat begins to burn, seven months worth of rotting urine stench welds itself to every molecule of surface area in respiratory system
>Tsunami of pus-bloated, putrescent bladder batter fragrance gushes and thunders into every crevice of my soul
>projectile vomit all over carpet and furniture
>Ah, that smells even better
>chug as fuck
Come get it ladies.

Did they say you're a degenerate?

I'd thought I'd finally found the purpose and direction in life when my ex and I were constantly talking about everything to do with having children when we I was financially ready (she was going to homeschool), the house we were going to build, her garden, and everything. I'd quit drinking except lightly on weekends, and was actually trying to better myself, because I had something in the future to look forward to.

Now, she's the only woman I've ever been with, and I don't really look forward to anything anymore.

That'll pass
Everything gets fuzzy over time.

Everyone has bouts of oneitis

n-no user. It's not the same this time. we even named our kids and drew floorplans and everything ;_;

Yeah, so do lots of people
No one expects failure going into a relationship
It's always full of hope and dreams

bought some suicide supplies lads
hopefully this time i'll actually do it

What happened user?

What did you buy?

pipes
gonna do a 12ga gun

Not drinking tonight. Took 1800mg of gabapentin. Feeling good.

No actually, they said things like
"You are the most important, you need to protect yourself so you can do well for others."
Or like a guy posted a pic of a necrotic liver and he said
"You deserve better."

Ultimately all those positive affirmations don't mean shit if you don't really want to make a change. You can't help somebody who doesn't want to be helped.
Besides you can't just stopped drinking when it's your sole means of entertainment and socializing. You kinda have to change alot because the drinking takes up alot of your life.

I know dude. I admitted that out of the 3 times I "tried" to stop I didn't really want to. You have to want it more than anything else you've ever wanted if you're a person like me I think.

Didn't want to come off as a prick. How bad is your drinking anyway?

No, you didn't come off as a prick at all. It's still pretty significant but not as bad as it was. I drink 6-7 beers a day or a bottle of wine. I used to wake up and drink vodka first thing to settle my shaking and my stomach. When it got that bad I went to detox and turned myself in. It was a good experience for me, I lived with and learned certain things from people who had a way harder time than me. It got me to cut back, but holy shit if complete abstinence doesn't seem like such a endeavor... Rest of my life? Can't imagine.

Oh yeah, since I've had my drinks tonight I'm forgetting to add details. I knew it was reaching a new stage after 6 years of drinking when I finally started to have psychic consequences from being dry for too long. Really weird brain feelings, leading to panic attacks later on, and in the worst instance almost like derealization during a hangover. It really is one of the most fucked up drugs. But you know people just have the thing that does the trick for them everywhere. I know I should stop but at least I'm not losing my mind without liquor anymore.

Maybe you should try therapy?

I see a psychiatrist currently have for actually 2 years through this whole bit, and I take a single SSRI. I don't want to take it but I almost felt like I was going insane without it 3 years ago drinking liquor constantly. I was crying and panicking almost all the time and always wanted to sleep.
I went to a psychologist before the psychiatrist and thought that just talking about your feelings and seeing lessons was absolute bullshit. Didn't help at all.
I mean I've cut back slightly but it's still fucked, I know.

Oh and also besides I mentioned I was in an outpatient group with people of all ages, about 15 or 20 people, and we all talked about things together and read books and talked with the head counseling people twice a week for like 3 hours, not a joke. I also went to AA 3 times a week for six weeks.
I just haven't managed to stay sober for more than a month in a row in quite some years. I don't expect a reply, it's like what can you even say to that you know.

I might stop replying in a bit because it's 6am and i need to sleep and I switched over to phoneposting.
One question though. What's your family/ friends situation rn?
It's true I don't really know how to reply to that bc you really have problems and really need serious help but I feel like you just want to vent atm.

Off topic a little but how can i get my doctor to give me adderal? Do they just give that shit to kids?

I would kill myself, but then I'd be sober.

Das deep.

My parents love me unconditionally even though I have done things in the past to disrespect them both and seem like an ungrateful piece of shit. They are all I have though, they have given me everything. I've traveled all around the country and internationally with my mom, and she would be my best friend if it weren't for this guy I've known for 19 years straight and we were always there for each other. All my friends are out of state now but we still talk.
Also it helps me greatly to vent and it I get by with it greatly and am able to go on alone once I do it. That was pretty intuitive of you, have a good day today.

Thanks. I hope things will be better for you, user.

My best wishes to you as well no matter what.

What a couple of fags. You going to kiss and rim each others assholes next?

i have an ultimate /alck/ thread i guesss
im sorrry

If it makes you feel better, she's probably getting fucked by some stranger right now.

You sound young.
Actually, you sound like someone who was dumped once and had their heart broken harder than anything they ever imagined possible in their relatively short life.

It does get fuzzy over time, as you accumulate life experience and/or let time wash your feelings away.

good afternoon
woke up this morning
bled all over sheets from cuts
planned to clean house but cleaning my room took an hour on its own as i was moving so slowly and listening to depressing music.
probably going to get fucked up again today/tonight
anyone else present on the thread atm? very lonely atm

hello user
i also know those feels

what should i mix this shit with to make it even slightly more drinkable?

Sugar and ice cold water.
Or just water, it's not supposed to be drunk pure.

its a sad existence isnt it

yes
yet we keep doing it to ourselves

Hey I've got a question.
My hip has been killing me lately to move around in certain ways, (and no I didn't fall down or anything) and has been for days. It just won't go away. Is there any way this could even remotely be related to drinking?
I know that drinking a lot isn't good for general healing processes of things that need to heal, but any ideas beyond that?

>, but any ideas beyond that?

Yeah. Ask a doctor, not the trollfest that is Veeky Forums.

I actually just read some articles off google.

should get on the filing down of those pipes
god willing

What are you talking about my dude.

day of the pipe soon

i'm on day 4 now myself. i'm having reaaally bad headaches all day, whats up with that? other than a bit of nausea i'm feeling okay i guess. i'm gonna do like you're doing except i'm going to drink on saturday which will be 6 days instead of 7.

the gods are not happy with me. i am afraid of things. i hope i can please them.

>you will never be a local wolfgirl having a comfy sleep
;_;

Just discovered vodka and limeade send help

I keep telling myself I'm not as hardcore as some of you guys here but tonight I consumed
>one liter of 13% red wine
>4 5% beers
>on my second whiskey right now
This is getting to be a habit and I'm luckily not experiencing adverse affects besides being unable to wake up before noon (doesn't interfere with my job btw). Hangovers are very rare. For the last two and a half years, 10 drinks a day were pretty common, but because of reading medical statistics I started using cannabis in an attempt to curb my drinking. That failed though, mainly because beer tastes absolutely delicious when high on pot. Shucks.

Yeah you got some withdrawal going on.
Headaches are the mildest symptom though

Alcohol withdrawal is the literally one of the worst you can have.
You will straight up die if your tolerance is too high.

too many days of binging steel reserve because I got sad over a girl

now I've got mild tremors
is this it, am I an alcuck now

>getting addicted due to beer
Wew lad
That's a lot of calories

how can I become an alcohol if I don't like the taste? What's something that will get wasted without it tasting terrible?
Suppositories aren't feasible.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAneMR1RTvw
Does nothing for me, my tolerance was at 2.1 L of vodka daily, but apparently gets most people drunk. Plus no calories. Oh and, and increased chance of death due to inability to vomit out excess alcohol should you overdo it. Enjoy.

Vodka has calories, mate

Not if you inhale it.

Thanks user, will try.

>tfw withdrawing
haha

>read through thread
>see posts and realize I wrote them when I was hammered

>Piss pot
Jesus m8,.....

Classic al/ck/y feel.

lol pretty good dude

Seriously? You don't have a pot to piss in? What the fuck do you do, go to the toilet EVERY time you need to piss? Fuck that. I spent approximately 23 hours and 50 minutes in bed out of every 24-hour day. I'll get food delivered to the front door, I have a microwave next to my bed, I have a pot to piss in a bowl to shit in, window next to me with a drain below it, and the hosepipe plumbed in from my kitchen tap, next to the bed, for drinking water, washing and shit flushing purposes. Toothbrush, some toothpaste, phone and laptop, is all I need to survive. i've been in bed for over a year, it's actually a pretty chilled life aside from the horrific amounts of mounting debt.
Cheers all.

Fuck... I picked up the flu at a superbowl party and haven't had anything to drink since monday morning. I can't tell which problems are caused by the flu, and which are caused by withdrawal.

God I just had the worst sleep after a five day rager
Repeated sleep paralysis and at one point I felt my consciousness fading in a way that sorta hurt, like I was suffocating in my head and chest at once, made me think I was gonna die.

I need a drink...

>sleep paralysis

Fuck I get this too when I drink a lot. Drank about a fifth of vodka last night and it happened this morning. I was able to snap out of it pretty quick this time but that shit is horrible.

>tfw there's a good argument you're being wawtched
help

>I've drank heavily for 9 years with the last 3 being alcohol.
Huh?

I need to stop but I'm scared that I can't

I've managed to cut back on my drinking quite a bit (down to just a beer or two a day compared to the two pints of liquor I'd go through), and I've managed to do this for about three weeks now. Is it withdrawals, because now for the last week and a half I've been waking up at about 3:00 AM every single night, even though I go to bed no later than 11:00, and my last drink was more than an hour before bed. Anyone have any ideas?

hello everybody
how are you all?

drinking
im scared that im goign to comitted

Considering quitting and depressed over the fact that I won't.

What I meant by that was the last 3 years as a full blown alcoholic.

Just woke up and had two beers and am puffin on a shitty little vape stick. Pretty good.

I see
yes I have that often too
very depressed
is it flavoured? ive gone all day dry. pretty anxious desu

>Still getting tremors
Fuck fuck I thought I'd wake up and be fine today
This is terrible I quit I can't hang with you guys anymore

have a drink and theyll go away dude

No flavor to speak of. Cartridge says fruit but it doesn't really taste of anything very much.

I have them because I drank from Saturday into Wednesday morning though

Why do you cold turkey yourself so hard like this? Financial reasons?

I sense I'm on the precipice of fucking up my academic and social life if I continue
Being functional while drunk is suddenly becoming way harder than it used to be

they say alcoholism tend to be genetic. any of you degenerates have an addict in the family?

mom grandpa aunts cousins desu...

Mom and grandpa were but quit, older cousin seems to be slightly more progressed than I am