I have $20 CAD and a high tolerance for alcohol

>birthday on the 12th feb
>plan on asking a girl out tomorrow who ive been in love with for 10 months (11th feb)
>valentines
rev up those suicide bags
i figured if i was going to incredibly miserable anyway it couldnt possible get any worse so i might as well go full retard

wait, so whats the issue here exactly
ask her out for valentines you fucking sperg

Nobody wants your fag blood anyway

buy the cheapest fortified wine you can find and plug it up your ass

This is sound advice. Don't let that pesky liver get in the way.

>being in love before he's even dating her

You shouldn't tell people. It's sad. Not the kind of sad we feel bad for you either. We're laughing at you. Also, if she says no you're going to be fucking devastated, and she probably will say no. Quit being a faggot. Never love a girl more than she loves you. That's how they wrap you around their finger.

This.
I learned the hard way
Along with a lot of self harm and severely damaged personality

Cheapest shit 1.5L of vodka you can find and a bottle of orange juice. Should run you about 15-20. Unless you live in a jew state for alcohol.

Well, I think the best thing to do in this case is approach your various options analytically. No point in going with vague answers such as "box wine" that don't address the actual alcohol content.

So a 5L boxed wine has about 476g of alcohol

A 750ml bottle of 80 proof has 233g

A 40oz of malt liquor has 65g (7%)

A regular 5% 12 oz bottle/can of beer has 14g

I'll let you run the prices yourself since I know Canadian booze pricing is a bit different from US. But just looking at this data now, I think box wine is the clear winner. I know that shit is cheap as hell here. I've seen 1.5L of Gordons vodka for sale at Walmart in Reno, NV for around $10 so that might be a close contender.

drink 8 liters of low grade anti freeze ($10 a 4L bottle at Canadian Tire)

Any large bottle of 40%

I've seen Mickeys of 94% at some SAQ's, but I'm not sure where you are.

butt chug

GET SOME FUCKING DIESEL!

Combo of a 40 and a 4loko, its about 4.50 overall, so you can get a ton of them

Can you still donate blood with weed and/or opiates in your system? I don't even know my blood type, but I don't want to go in there and get kicked out.

>not posting the but chugging interview video

2 liter of canadian cooler , and a pint of cheap vodka . Mix and enjoy !

>20 loonies
Based on the fact that it's the biggest meme currency and going off the standard alcohol prices in Canada, I'm guessing you might be able to afford a 375ml bottle of bottom shelf vodka.

750 ml of ouzo is 40% and was $20 last time I bought it

You should really just use alcohol units. Grams is way harder than 10ml of pure alcohol. Eg. 80proof 750 is 30 units. 40oz at7% is about 8.2 units

>canadian dollars

For $20 CAD maybe you'll be able to buy one grain of rice.

Some alkie moosefucker said bottom-shelf cream sherry was the best $CAD to %ABV ratio not too long ago

They dont check for weed but Im not sure about opiates
>t. donated blood a few weeks ago and smoke weed all the time

nigga what. every drug in the universe is measured by the gram.

> jew state
> lives in Canada
The hassidic jew state

mickey of wisers $11
2 king cans of beer $9

slam it

buy $20 CAD worth of gasoline and huff the fumes for two days straight.

Buy grain alcohol (95.6% ABV). Dilute with your favorite soft drink. 1 shot = a little over two shots of vodka so dilute accordingly.

buy 5 faxe extra strong beers 10% gets the job done

Growers Cider 2L if you don't eat it should get you nice and drunk. Sometimes if I drink it fast enough I even black out.