Imagine going to a party and the white suburban stay at home mom with two overachiever kids and white dad who barbeques but doesn’t know how to barbeque and yet is always surrounded by other white Dads who compliment his barbqeuing even though they’re just store bought preshaped frozen patties from Ralph’s or Food 4 Less and while he’s cooking those the white mom comes out and says “okay kids, here’s some pizza!” And she pulls this out and starts telling the kids why its a “fun pizza” and then cries in her master bedroom when no one likes it or finishes it and the white dad is then consoling her why she sobs that she’s a terrible mother and ruined her fourth grade straight B+ sons birthday and thinks her kids hate her but they don’t care but she continues crying softly into her pillow while the children eat poorly cooked burgers with unmelted kraft singles and too much mayonnaise and the only other condiments are two pickles and pepper because the dad calls it his special burger with a secret spice but the spice was just pepper and the kids just keep playing E rated games on their Nintendo Wii while the 17 year old older sister starts cleaning the tragedy up and throwing away uneaten “fun pizza” and whole burgers dejected from the start while she dials Pizza Hut to get these kids an actual birthday lunch and the mother then throws a fit because the daughter did something the kids liked and she didn’t and was the only one making a huge deal out of it and the daughter was then grounded from her TV in her room for only two days and the son went to blow out the candles in his standard birthday cake from food 4 less the mom added strawberries to so she could feel she did something but was still slightly teary and sad because her day was ruined by no one wanting to eat her “fun pizza”
Imagine going to a party and the white suburban stay at home mom with two overachiever kids and white dad who barbeques...
Fuck trump and Fuck white people
>Imagine...
Ok.
What's "fun" about picking up a slice of watermelon and having a bunch of other fruit sitting on top fall off of it?
At least have an ounce of common sense mixed in with your creativity and spread a layer of vanilla yogurt or something on top so the "toppings" will stick.
I would eat that pizza. Just saying
Wow this is so insightful and edgy. You should really have a career doing this. This is really really good and I'm so glad you did those. Man, I can't even imagine what a better person you are than a person with a home and a family celebrating their child's birth.
You are so dang cool
You have to be at least 18 to post here
I miss this pasta. Look at all these newfags, wew.
That fruit dessert is cute. I didn't read the text but I would have if it had paragraph breaks.
I wouldn't mind some j00cy summer fruit right about now.
I would've eaten the fun pizza
>look at all the fags who didn't spend years of their lives posting the same food memes over and over.
I'd eat that. I'd have pity sex with your mom too.
kek you've been taken in by tumblr copypasta
would eat as an adult, but not as a kid
such is true of handling most of life's hardships
It's called a "grill", numbnuts
>everybody ITT who hasn't seen this age old pasta before
Fools
Numbers confirm.
don't forget about the birthday cake!
>she pulls this out and starts telling the kids why its a “fun pizza” and then cries in her master bedroom when no one likes it
This will always be funny
This looks better to me than a regular cake, especially if that's yogurt on the outside.
I was thinking sugar frosting on watermelon would be way too sweet. Hope it's something like yogurt.
Eh, are those ticks on the kiwi?
While your story was very imaginative and made me feel like I was there, what kind of kid doesn't like fruit? My son would demolish that whole thing. I don't know how he eats more waterlemon than I do in one sitting, and no, he's not a nigger.
You eat it parallel to the ground, ya dingus.
Your wifes' son is probably far more genetically gifted than you are.
Pumpkin Seeds, most likely.
You have to go back.
Ah, I'll always forget that there's the wife's son meme, lel.
the sister sounds cute tbqh