Don't even talk to me until I've had my coffee

...

What are 'Excuses for unhealthy people with poor diet, inadequate exercise and bad sleep schedules to bitch about their inane frustrations in the morning', Alex

I hate addicts.

Why is caffeine addiction the only socially acceptable one?

Because it's not a drug user. Alcohol, sugar and caffeine aren't drugs, everyone uses them! A REAL drug is something like weed, lsd, mushrooms, mdma and all the other disgusting chemicals people put into theirbodies.

Stannis isn't a degenerate that can't function without caffeine, though.

>burns his daughter
>not a degenerate

>watching gays of thrones

>Tfw wife won't let me cum in her until she's had her morning coffee

Because you're not a threat to yourself and those around you when operating heavy machinery or a motor vehicle after consuming caffeine.

>wife won't let him cum in her till she has had something strong and black inside her

cuck

Anyone else imagining a couple in the act stirring cream into a coffey. Irritated looks on both faces. Her finger up in a hold on a moment gesture?

>tfw you consume 500+ mg of caffeine per day for years
>Still no withdrawal symptoms after several days without

My death will be sudden

yeah he's just a loser lmao. worst battle commander ever.

>things you never hear tea people say because they are well adjusted, pleasant individuals
>also we don't drink coffee

yeah bro there's no way you're getting that much caffeine. get some tablets and pop 500mgs and you'll know i'm right.

BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

snnnnniiiiiiffffffffffff...oh yes my dear....sssnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff....quite pungent indeed...is that....dare I say....sssssssnniff...eggs I smell?......sniff sniff....hmmm...yes...quite so my darling....sniff....quite pungent eggs yes very much so .....ssssssssssssssnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiffffff....ah yes...and also....a hint of....sniff....cheese.....quite wet my dear....sniff...but of yes...this will do nicely....sniff.....please my dear....another if you please....nice a big now....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPFFFFFF

Oh yes...very good!....very sloppy and wet my dear....hmmmmm...is that a drop of nugget I see on the rim?...hmmmm.....let me.....let me just have a little taste before the sniff my darling.......hmmmmm....hmm..yes....that is a delicate bit of chocolate my dear....ah yes....let me guess...curry for dinner?....oh quite right I am....aren't I?....ok....time for sniff.....sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff.....hmmm...hhhmmmmm I see...yes....yes indeed as well curry......hmmm....that fragrance is quite noticeable....yes.....onion and garlic chutney I take it my dear?.....hmmmmm....yes quite.....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRRPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT

Oh I was not expecting that…that little gust my dear….you caught me off guard…yes…so gentle it was though…hmmmm…let me taste this little one…just one small sniff…..sniff…ah….ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffffff…and yet…so strong…yes…the odor….sniff sniff…hmmm….is that….sniff….hmmm….I can almost taste it my dear…..yes….just…sniff….a little whiff more if you please…..ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffff…ah yes I have it now….yes quite….hhhhmmmm…delectable my dear…..quite exquisite yes…..I dare say…sniff….the most pungent one yet my dear….ssssnnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffff….yes….

3 cans of canned cancer a day, 480mg

On the plus side, I'll likely die of liver disease before hypertension

Yeah drink that kool-aid up
Slurp it up little piggy
Slurp slurp

Kys m8

Wait is consuming that much caffeine that bad?

I know a guy who drinks like a whole pitcher of tea then buys 4 of the biggest tea Starbucks have

It can be. Not only can you get addicted to it, too much caffeine can lead to kidney stones.

>anime pic
>wife
pick one

Dude that's manga, not anime.

I bet you have a replica katana on your wall, too, faggot.

you dont have a wife you stupid anime

>you're not a threat to yourself and those around you when operating heavy machinery or a motor vehicle after consuming caffeine.
You're not doing it right.

fucking subhumans

I fired a guy for pulling this shit, though it was just the last straw in a long line of fuck-ups

>Tfw my wife won't let me have my morning coffee until she has come inside me

One cup of coffee doesn't affect me in any appreciable way.

Two cups and I feel absolutely terrible and while my body is still my soul is powering along at 100mph.

I react much better to alcohol than caffeine.

Hot.

Kekk

What is happening here famalam t.bh fr

>Implying you don't work as a bottom feeder and you're just lying in a Sanskrit runes board.

tea? like ginseng tea? that's full of caffeine?

Dog semen is also full of calories.

Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee stout...

no, weed is a plant! it is natural and healthy and cures cancer!
>what about opium?
no that is bad and kill u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate trolls.

The fuck did you drink

>implying

sugar addiction is a much bigger problem user. at least coffee drinkers acknowledge they're drinking the beverage to get a drug fix (even though if they only say it in a meme "LOL GOTTA GET CAFFIENE" way), nobody ever talks about how dependent we are on sugar

>tfw I love coffee but don't need it to wake up

This satirical post is most correct.

9.5/10

I wouldn't want to speak to people who take zero personal responsibility for who they are anyways.