Did you ever have 'sex' with some fruit/vegetable?

Would fucking someone with Downs count?

As a kid i tried to fuck a microwaved bagel once but my dick was too thick and it broke the bagel. I ended up making a pocket pussy with a cup, glove, and sponges.

kek. And no I'm not under 18, but that struck me as humorous.

how would fucking a system of the down fan count?

Go to sleep dad. Apparently your humor peaked 15 years ago.

I"ve considered a ham. Never done it though.

Yes, cucumber

best tl;dr ever

Not a vegetable, but a warm bag of rice.

I have sex with a banana once
I was feeling alone

Holy shit that pumpkin is asking for it.

I think thats a squarsh

portnoy pls

underrated

That is hilarious.
>when the dick is so tasty it gives girls seizures

Would fucking a braindead faggot count as fucking a fruit and veg at the same time? Or would it be culinary a fruit and biologically a vegetable?

youre scaring away the children

>Set radiator to max
>Grab two steaks
>Flatten them both a little
>Grab some sturdy string or rope
>Put the rope through the edges on both sides
>Shove steaks in-between the grids
>Tread rope behind radiator and tie them to the grid
>Wait for them to heat up
>Get ready for some radiation masturbation

What third world hellhole do you live in where radiators are still in use?

ur a squarsh

A banana peel, with the banana carefully removed, is GOAT of all time onahole. Almost as good as real goat.

Probably Boston or NYC. NYC even has steam tunnels that occasionally explode, sort of like something out of the USSR. Not even joking, they had one blow up a while back and it snowed asbestos flakes all over the area, cleanup cost millions.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2007_New_York_City_steam_explosion

Looks like there was another one in 1989. Fucking savages.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gramercy_Park_asbestos_steam_explosion

The first reference mentions some other cities that have "commercial steam" for heating customers' buildings, including Philadelphia.

I buy cucumbers and shove them up my ass instead of buying dildos because I don't want my roommates to think I'm gay.

Btw, hands free prostate orgasms are so fucking good you've never lived till you try it.

Well, depends. Do you consider a baseboard heater a radiator? They function the same way.
Everywhere I've lived in PacNW has them.

why does that pear have so many ticks in it?

Radiators are full of hot steam/water running inside.

Baseboard heaters have hot electric coils running inside.

good post

Bestiality or necrophilia?

...

>Everywhere I've lived in PacNW has them.
u got all dat sweet hydropower, me jelly. cheap electric bills?

If you have sex with a vegetable, but it back in the wheel chair when yer done.

Iwtf that plumpkin

THICCC

I used to jerk off with banana peels

How do you heat your house?

I'm confused? Radiators aren't normal?
Pretty much the whole of northern-europe, not exactly the poorest part of the world has them in their houses.
How do you heat your home?

Cucumber in pooper
It was too thick for me so I adjusted the diameter. That made it too weak tho, so my asshole "bit off" the tip. Luckily I was able to just poop it out

>Radiators aren't normal?

In many parts of the world, no. Go to north america and asia and they're very rarely seen.

I've lived in several US states; in all of them we have a central heating furnace. Sometimes electric, sometimes gas-powered. It heats the air directly and the heated air is directed to each room via one or more ducts. When the weather is warm the same ducts are used for A/C.

AC units like pic related. Controlled by a small wall-mounted panel in the house called a thermostat, these things can pipe cold or warm air through vents built into the home. I'm from the South East USA and I've rarely seen a house without one of these, and those that don't have self-contained window mounted units that work much the same.

It would be real dumb to stick your dick in a papaya. It has enzymes in it that are used as meat tenderizers. It wouldseriously irritate your dick.

Use this next time.

Well thanks guys, that does explain why I see all those ventilation grids on walls and ceilings in American series and hardly ever radiators now I come to think of it.

Btw in most of the European homes the radiators are also controlled by a thermostat that fires up a central heater that pumps the warm water through the radiators.

radiators are used in areas with big dick old money rich houses because the houses were built 60 years ago when radiators were standard. its a pain in the ass (and sometimes impossible) to redo the entire houses heating. other times the radiators/radiator case are built in stylistically with the house so it doesnt make sense to remove them (see pic)

>this whole thread

>if youve ever fucked a guys whos ass was full of shit
>even now that I dont have testicles

Hmm, it seems to be the fixation on AC. Central heating that heats water for the radiators, taps and shower seems more efficient to me.

>and shower
That would result in a very weak shower. I'm guessing you have a power shower, which is electrically heated

>Central heating that heats water for the radiators, taps and shower seems more efficient to me.

Except in the summer when you need hot water for cooking/cleaning/laundry/showers, but you need the AC running to keep the house cool.

That said, a lot of larger buildings--like an office building, large apartment building, or an industrial complex, have a centralized steam boiler for heating & hot water. The AC might be handled by individual units, or by a large central unit that circulates chilled brine through a series of pipes.

Shower runs off the same pipe the taps do, which is heated by a gas boiler. Which also heats the radiators. Pressure is fine as it is constantly topped up by the boiler as you draw water through it.
Combi boilers exist, and they are good.

Only posh gits and office buildings here (UK) have AC b/c it costs an absolute fortune to get it fitted.
All the houses are either old as fuck and don't have any room for vents/ducts, or are built to fit in with existing houses so don't have any room for vents/ducts.