Post roommate horror stories

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You first.

Keep it food related, faggot. We dont need another /b/

He uses all my Tupperware, can't cook for shit and leaves the whole apartment smelling of burnt food, and leaves the countertops a fucking mess. He's a fat slob, a faggot, and he even drinks my alcohol sometimes. I'm fed up with his shit, that fucking faggot. He's a damn manchild.

That's not a manchild, that's your average roommate.

Disdain for the days of not living alone. Like holy fucking shit wash your dishes you retard I like to cook food on tgemthem also.

Not food related whatsoever but I have no one else to vent to or ask about this.

I just moved in with a couple from Craigslist, girl and a guy.

The guy is super greasy and smells like old wet clothes ALWAYS. Is always wearing the same shirt. Skinny and tall, generally gross.

The girl is super friendly, super well-adjusted, very attractive, studying to take the MCAT next week. Bottom line is, I'm not sure what she sees in this guy, but anyway.

THE MALE ROOMMATE LEAVES A PISSY, YELLOW WAD OF TOILET PAPER ON THE TOILET SEAT OR THE SINK EVERY MORNING.

I don't know why he does this? It's normally a pretty small wad but sometimes its like a whole sheet of toilet paper. I can't find anything about this online and no one I've told has heard of this happening before.

Does he accidentally piss on the seat and wipe it up, and forget to flush it?
Does he wipe the end of his dick and then just forget it?

I'm so confused. It's disgusting.
Can anyone help me out?

I have to assume he's wiping his dick dry instead of giving it the ol' shaka-shaka and then throwing the wad at the general direction of the toilet

Fuck.
I used to live in this illegal ass artist's studio/house with 8 other people. We had this fuckwad constantly high who stole literally everyone's food, and his fat ass hick girlfriend who didnt help pay rent would take 1.5 hours to get ready in one of the two bathrooms. I caught him stealing and he just said "well can i have one?". He was the only black person in the house and would talk all this crap about how hard he is, and how he came from the worst neighborhoods (oceanside and then eagle rock, both literally white suburbias). He smoked a black and mild in the bathroom and dropped it burned thru the linoleum on the floor. He would catch anyone in the kitchen and talk nonstop keeping us in conversational hostage and only ever talked about his previous "dangerous" and "ghetto" lifestyle.

stop living with roomates. they are always shit. get your own place.

Shut up fuckwad are you 11? Roommates are completely fucking necessary in most metro areas

If you're poor. I know most people are and it's only getting worse in the US but somebody's gotta squeak into that middle class slot.

wish he would instead add some frrrressssshhhly ground bLLLack pepper.

My old college roommate is my best friend, but holy shit did that guy have some weird habits when it came to the kitchen.

He had this old aluminum pan/plate/dish that he used to cook all of his leftovers in, just pop it in, and put it in the oven. Anything that wasn't sauce based went in there, which wouldn't be a problem, but he never cleaned it. He told me it was to "retain the flavor," but it was just greasy and gross because he was mostly just heating up shit like frozen chicken nuggets or leftover Jack in the Box. I wasn't into cooking at the time so it took me a few years to realize he was mixing it up with seasoning a cast iron skillet.

A recurring problem with cleaning dishes made me move permanently to buying my own cleaning sponges and paper plates/plastic stuff... he used to clean the dishes with the same sponges he'd use to clean the tile floor, where the dog walked around and we tracked shit in all day and sometimes the dog would pee or shit or vomit... it was just awful. I tried to explain to him that using the same sponge for this shit on the plates we eat off of was hugely unsanitary, but he said "no man, there's soap on it! It kills everything!"

I have more that aren't kitchen related, and some stories of when I was shitty, if people are interested.

How nice it must have been for you to roll right into your own apartment from your parents house because youre first paying job was beyond entry level. How amazing your life must be. Teach me senpai i want to suck your rich successful dick

I had a roommate who would take trash out halfway. Like, he would just bring the bag outside the door. What in the fuck does this achieve? Used to piss me off so bad. Random pic to illustrate what I'm talking about.

Whenever I saw that he did this, I would take the trash to the dumpster. He would always go "dude, I was gonna take the trash out, you didn't have to do that". Well, I did have to do that because I am not interested in literally keeping garbage at my doorstep.

It's always the little things when you live with a roommate that get under your skin until you reach a breaking point.

He put it outside because it smells duh
Then in the morning when you're going out you put in the the dumpster or whatever it goes.

Even middle class people don't live alone until their late 30s genius. No one has a good-paying job for that until then unless they're extremely lucky or from a rich family.

These threads are always great, I love seeing all you autistic freaks that get SO upset over total non-issues.

>there are crumbs on the counter sometimes omfg so messy
>muh SMELLS that nobody else notices but it TRIGGERS ME
>he doesn't wash dishes IMMEDIATELY after using them
>what a slob this is COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE!!!!!!!!

Like holy shit get a life man, the problem here is YOU.

YOU are the one getting unreasonably upset over literally nothing.

What the other guy said. I like to eat canned sardines and other fish and shit. When I eat them, I double bag the tin, throw it in the trash, and if the trashbag is close to full, take it and put it outside so my roommates don't have to deal with fish smell. When I'm leaving next, I'll take it all the way out.

My roommate shutting off the furnace at night in the dead of winter and causing all of our waterpipes to freeze is not literally nothing.

Yeah, and then raccoons tear the bag apart in the middle of the night and you've got a mess to clean up. Plus, now it's a spot raccoons will come check out for more trash.

Good job.

Remember that Veeky Forums is mostly women and women have a pathological obsession with cleaning every surface in a given domestic residence.

I do like seeing the differences here, but then there's also genuine horror stories of people that are just absolute fuckups and you wonder what their family life must be like.

What if you live somewhere that there aren't raccoons? I live in the fucking desert. Ain't nothing here alive tearing into our trashbags and no one wants to walk in 120 degree heat to take a bag of trash to the dumpster.

jej

Just rinse the tins out you dink

t. lazy people. just fucking take the trash out, you aren't doing your roommates and neighbors any favors by leaving a bag of trash next to your door.

Roommates still complain. It's an easy common courtesy for me to take the bag outside. This applies for any food though, really.

I wonder if this guy has ever been the bad roommate...

it's not a common courtesy to take trash halfway out but I think it's cute how you came up with a justification for it

>do what I tell you on your property

No.

Lol, if you rent then it's not your property and there is most likely a clause in your lease about proper waste disposal. If you live in a building, there is definitely going to be a rider about the common area. Moreover, if you live with roommates then there's a social contract to keep the place clean. Keep justifying being a slob though

Puts his clothes in the dryer and leaves it running for like 4 hours and jacks the power bill through the roof. Had to explain to him how much it costs. Also runs his AC at the lowest temp all the time.

Doesn't know how recycling works/doesn't give a shit.

He's a smoker, which whatever I don't care about he does it outside, but he lets his ashtray fill up to the brim and then the wind blows fucking cigarette butts everywhere.

Fucked up my containers because he would microwave shit in them.

Doesn't clean in general.

Doesn't replace or chip in money for consumables.

And all he talks about is his burger flipping job but makes no attempt to get anywhere in life and blows all his money on new clothes and shoes.

We've been friends for probably 10 years but living together for 2 and I always knew he was fucking dumb, but I wish we never moved in together. I tell him about this shit every few months and he gets a bit better but then goes back to being shit. I'm getting my own place when the lease is up so fuck it. Sorry for blog needed to vent.

>If you rent

I'm not a nu-male like you, who whines harder about his roommate's habits than his current living situation.

wow great comeback, you sure refuted me

>2017
>he doesn't own land

How does life not working out for you feel, user?

*shrug*

I don't live in a place where getting the trash to its final spot is annoying anymore, but I'd rather my roommate took smelly trash and put it in the garage than just let it sit inside and stink. I fail to see how it's an annoying thing. Not taking it out at all is more annoying.

You don't need the furnace running at night. Nobody is occupying communal spaces. You're under your blankets in a pocket of self-contained warmth. Heating the entire place would be a waste of energy.

This all take place in commiefornia? Because our oceanside isnt as bad as people keep making out to be, and eagle rock is only a walk from Pasadena.

>owns land
>lives with roommates apparently

good job, you fucked it up

I do own land btw.

You being comfy under a blanket doesn't stop the pipes from locking up or bursting.

Also waking up and getting out of those comfy blankets when the room is below freezing is extremely difficult, an unnecessary obstacle in getting ready for work or college

I agreed with you about freezing pipes but anyone who bitches about not being able to get ready for work or school because they're cold and too comfortable fucking triggers me. Get up and get out of bed you fucking child.

>owns land
>doesn't do the smart thing and earn rent shekels off of desperate nu-males like yourself

>The only woman I've ever lived with is my mother

Women will live like slobs if left to their own devices. Dishes everywhere, hair on the carpet, food left out. Bathrooms are the worst.

>women
>Veeky Forums
Pick one

go ahead

The room is literally below freezing, we have real winter here.

I don't care, wake the fuck up and get out of bed. I've been in below freezing temperatures, they suck, but tough it up and get out of bed. Don't be a little bitch.

I wanna send people like you to the military for a few months. Nothing bothers me more than people who hit the snooze button or are late for things because they wouldn't (there is no couldn't unless you're disabled) get out of bed on time.

>me tuff manly man, me been thru basic once

You've merely dipped your toe in the cold.
I was born in it. Molded by it. I didn't feel summer's warmth until I was already a man, by that time it was nothing to me but scalding!

So if I say it's too cold to get out of bed in a timely manner, I mean it.

Some people just like the place clean and tidy instead of wallowing in their own filth.

>reading comprehension
You realize other stuff isn't under a blanket? Kek'd

hmm. nice quote. feels like i recognize it from somewhere.

You are the greatest faggot I've seen. Pls be bait. Do you even hypothermia?

Hypothermia from getting out from under "warm, comfy blankets" and getting to a warm shower? Give me a break.

The poster was bitching that they were "too comfy" in their warm blankets to make it to work or class. That's some lame ass shit there.

What's lame is your "muh military muh basic" posturing, as though sleeping on a bunk and going camping for a few weeks is some sort of accomplishment.

When you've been lying still in sub-zero temperatures for several hours it is physically more difficult to wake up and physically difficult to move.
And how are you getting a warm shower? The pipes froze, jackass. There is no hot water.

Like I said, no problem with the guy being pissed the pipes froze, but don't give me the fucking excuse that it's too cold to wake up. It's not an accomplishment to get up on time, just like it's not an insurmountable idea to not be "comfy" all the time. No, shit sucks, you're cold, I get it. But don't make excuses that you can't make it to work or school on time because it's cold.

I wasn't the guy that didn't say the heat shouldn't be on at night - I think it should be. I just can't stand people who make weak dick excuses about things. It's the same as people who can't stop using their snooze button or eating sweets or other shit that causes them the slightest bit of discomfort.

I don't think you understand what winter is and how how much additional challenge it adds to everyday tasks.

The fact that you assume there's going to be hot water when the pipes have frozen makes it clear you've never so much as set foot in a temperature controlled beer room, nevermind endured an actual blizzard.

Get over yourself and stop getting triggered by the word "comfy"

Try ranger training, you MRE buying faggot , and go with only 4 hours sleep at night in very different environments, for a long ass time.

Just because you play paintball on the weekends and eat MRE's for lunch, gives you no right to compare yourself to a trained soldier.

If you live somewhere really cold you should be used to it. Get dressed, put some clothes on, if you're wearing a long sleeved shirt and some pants below freezing isn't that bad. Maybe a little chilly but if you want to be extra warm put another layer and some thick socks on.

People around here wear ski masks walking down the sidewalk so they don't get frost bite on their faces lmao.

Again, ignore the frozen pipes. I'm not trying to tell the guy he should sleep in the cold or let his pipes freeze. That user says "below freezing" like more than half of the country doesn't experience below freezing temperatures all winter, so sorry if I can't feel some sob story for them having trouble to get up and shower and get their day started when most of the country does it all the time.

It might not be a hot shower, but it's doable, so stop bitching, put another blanket on your best, and get up on time. You're acting like it being 20 degrees out means the eskimos are outside on sled dogs.

You're reaching now.

Thank you, Chef John

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is your roommate Masaokis? literally the only time I've ever heard of something like this was in one of his videos where he points the camera at a towel and says something like "This one's all yellow cuz I wipe my dick on it after I pee."

>I live in the fucking desert
Get out of that shit.

my old roommate use to leave food out, and I don't mean like bits of food after she was done, or like forget to put away stuff. She would cook large portions of meat, and after just leave it on the kitchen table or living room desk, uneaten for days.
There would be a week of an uneaten salmon out. I started taking photos and made a shitty collage of it.
Another thing she would do is every time I would try to use the kitchen she would come in and just watch me over my shoulder not saying anything. I'm really not a confident cook, so I would freak out and just freeze up. It gotten to the point I was so afraid of entering the kitchen.
Not really a horror story, but it was nerve wrecking

That is the dumbest thing I ever heard.

And it all could have been solved with communication. Fuck you you weak little faggot.

I own my own home in florida two blocks from the ocean. I have no roomates.

You're being a faggot by talking up your 19 year old self living in a fucking barracks room with broken heating and A/C like you're smart or tough by not having the luxury. Fucking boot.

My roommate didn't seem to understand the concept of leftovers and would throw out anything older than a day, even if it would have been good for 2 weeks.

>But nobody was eating it!
It's been in there for 3 days holy shit

i'm pretty sure i would be the one my housemates talk about, and i was afraid i'd be posted here. it's a relief i'm not.

>florida

Jesus christ that is horrifying

>Be a poor college student
>Splurge on expensive but worth it olive oil
>Haven't even opened the bottle yet
>Smell chicken being fried
>Walk into kitchen
>Roommate has used more than 3/4 the bottle to fry chicken

I recently had to purchase a large mini fridge for my room because my food would constantly be eaten if I had it in the kitchen.
Food I would buy on my way home from work would just not be there when I woke up.

Not happening anymore and I'm constantly hearing complaints about how there's never any food in the house.

I honestly wouldn't mind so much if I wasn't the only one who bought groceries, but I can't afford to feed them, I make less then both of them.

>tfw my roommate was the opposite of this and would keep shit in the freezer all semester and NEVER touch it until the last week
short story: I ate some of his food, usually frozen bagels and shit that was in there for over a month

Not really, if anyone tried to bring up something with her, she would just go on the defensive and say it's her right, and you are acting out "self hatred or internalizing misogyny" not sure how either is related to cleaning up after yourself.

Not really roommate, but my mother is a complete slob in the kitchen. She'll make pots of food, or use a pan, and after the meal just leave it out over night. Or worse, put the entire pot in the fridge with some tin foil on it. Sometimes she'd leave containers of food out for long it would get nasty and crusty, then just throw the pot/pan out in the yard. Then eventually spray it out with the hose or throw it out. I hated it so much it's the main reason i moved out the second i could and never let her cook for me when i go home. Me, i clean my stuff as i'm cooking and often rinse my stuff out before i eat.

>Not really roommate, but my mother is a complete slob in the kitchen.

i love my mother and her cooking, but jesus christ, she has no sense of sanitation or preservation.

>back home for a visit
>want to make coffee
>have to empty out 3 day old coffee grinds from french press
>go to add creamer
>oh nice a bottle of baileys!
>open bottle, and CLUMPS of fermented baileys drop from the bottle
>check the expiration date
>7 years ago

HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE WE HAVE MOVED HOUSES 2 TIMES SINCE THEN

I've been rewatching some of his videos recently, he's definitely gotten less dirty.

My Roommate goes to the store 8 times a week and never eats anything he buys. He asks me for my food. He drinks 5 cokes a day. He makes it known that hes drinking coke due to his gulp of power

old housemate used to leave a small amount of milk in the bottom of really narrow glasses and then not wash the glass
I would just throw them away if I found them

Lived with a chinese guy on campus for a while. He used to cook chicken breasts in the rice cooker and then just leave them there for up to a week I would assume.

I used to have a roommate that ate Country Crock spread like pudding. Same roommate accidently wiped his ass with the tail of his shirt right before we went to a wedding. He just tucked that skid mark in and kept going.

>come back from vacation
>all my food is eaten
>stuff in my room is touched
For instance my stahlhelm gets messed with everytime I fucking leave for a weekend. I can tell because I tuck the strap underneath the helmet when I set it down but my dumbfuck 'friends' aren't smart enough to realize that and leave the strap untucked when putting it back.
>one time a bookmark in one of my books was in a different spot
>one time my roommate ran out of toilet paper and took one of my two-ply rolls
No worries though, he made sure to repay me with a roll of his shitty one-ply TP after he bought more.

Wehraboo detected.

>Final year of undergrad
>Random Saudi gets moved into the free room of our apartment
>he's fat as Fuck and wearing a "baller for life" shirt when he first walks in
>drenched in cologne
>he comes home one day with two packs of 30 chicken legs each
>in the middle of the night, he's cooking with a God Damn pressure cooker
>plsnobomb.gif
>loud as shit, but finally ends
>stay at girlfriend's house next several nights
>my other roommate doesn't use the fridge, just eats chef boyardee
>no one knows the horror that is brewing
>Still no use for fridge after another 10 days or so oddly enough
>open fridge
>horror intensifies
>chicken is spread out, open all over the inside of the fridge bottom shelf
>raw chicken juices everywhere
>the smell
>throw a fucking fit, threaten to call landlord
>he doesn't get it but starts to throw away chicken anyway. He only ate 3 legs
>sprays room with full bottle of shit cologne to cover it up.

Fuck you op for making me remember

>not installing your own lock and locking your room when you live with roomates

>frying chicken in olive oil

Disgusting.

can you please share with me his first name? i have to know.

>These threads are always great, I love seeing all you autistic freaks that get SO upset over total non-issues.

Clearly you never left home and your parents mollycoddle your bad habits or you live like CWC and the health department is one phonecall away from declaring your house a public health hazard.

Being a housemate is about consideration. Lack of consideration makes shit harder for everyone. Schedules, routines, plans, etc., Especially if you rent your home and are subject to inspections.

I would hate having to blow off plans just because I'm deathly afraid of getting kicked out of my place or that my meal plan/food budget has been completely compromised due to sponge housemates pinching my shit

Lock your shit up, man.

But...wouldn't they notice the smell?

I hate to say it but this guy is right.

You guys get pissy over stupid shit. And no I don't live with roomates. I just hear the stupid shit you bring up. Dishes don't have to be washed immediately. I've literally seen you guys complain because ketchup was left outside.

>Dishes don't have to be washed immediately.
Not washed, but fuck it takes like 10 seconds to rinse your plate before everything gets caked in

So some of you bitch when things don't get thrown out and then you bitch when they do. You guys are major aspies.

What is it with this board and complaining about mothers so much? This place really is filled with women isn't it

Literally women: the thread

Come on. If someone had rinsed the plate some of you would complain and say shit like "well why not just finish washing it".

It's a non stop bitch fest around here.

>He doesn't live by himself