Flatmate stories

that is from Panty and Stocking w/ Gartebelt, you fucking uncultured peasant

lump
i mean bump

My roommate just sits in his room and does dabs all fucking day every day. When he does eat it's usually either oven French fries, stuffing, or dollar store candy/pop tarts of some sort. It's unreal how he's still alive, this on top of energy drinks daily.

>live with roomie
>we both agree to do our own groceries
>roomie does his groceries one day
>fills the entire fridge and freezer with his own food
>never eats the stuff in the freezer

Thanks

bupm

>durrr purple means ponies
retard

>usually one of us goes by snacks for the week for both of us
>he's fucking fat
No matter how much we buy it won't last a week. He just ate 8 big portions of ramen in two days.

>about to have a flatmate for the first time in my life
>Cant bring myself not to think of all those Veeky Forums horror stories I've read

Uh, don't eat jam that had mold on it. Killing the bacteria isn't enough, they leave toxins that will make you sick even after they're dead

...

>housemate too lazy to refill ice trays
>buys a big bag of ice instead
>takes up half the already tiny-ass freezer

it took so long to get through it as well

baka

>First year of college
>End up in a tiny room with 2 room mates
>Medium sized fridge (maybe three feet tall)
>Was kind of chubby until I was 10-11
>Didn't want to get fucked over by the fast food jew
>Brought a duel hot plate, skillet, and crockpot with to help cook
>Room mates occasionally used the hot plate but they only knew how to make kraft mac and cheese and ramen
>Never fucking cleaned up their mess
>Decided arguing was stupid and cooking solely for myself was wasteful
>Started cooking for all of us
>Got creative because I didn't have an oven
>Pretty good year overall

Fast forward to this year and its improved a lot. I have my own apartment and it has a nice kitchen - despite how tiny it is. My old roommates kept trying to bum meals off me at the beginning of the year and I somehow ended up selling homemade meals during most of this year. I'm not an awful chef, but I can make simple shit and people will just eat it up. Veeky Forums has been pretty helpful because I just find shit that is on sale and come here for inspiration on how I should prepare it.

Mold is a fungus, not a bacteria.

I THROW OUT WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT DUDE IT'S MY MONEY. I DON'T SORT OUT THE GARBAGE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO. CHANGE THE LAW IF IT MATTERS SO MUCH. OH OH I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU THREW OUT THE END OF THAT ONION YOU DICED, WHY YOU COULD SIMPLY PUT IT INTO A BAG IN THE FREEZER AND WHEN YOU HAVE A LARGE BAG OF VEGETABLE ENDS YOU COULD MAKE A DELICIOUS BROTH.

SHUT THE FUCK UP ENVIRONMENT FAGS ITS MY MONEY. ENJOY EATING MY TRASH DOG, WHATEVER MAKES YOU HAPPY.

they still poop nasty stuff

I'M NOT EVEN DONE YET. ONIONS ARE SO FUCKING CHEAP WHO ARE THESE RETARDED HIPSTERS SAVING VEGETABLE ENDS ACTING LIKE THEY ARE IN THE GREAT DEPRESSION AND SHIT? DO VEGETABLE ENDS MAKE A BETTER BROTH??? MAYBE I VALUE FREEZER SPACE MORE THAN THAT.

EVERY CUNT THAT DUMPSTER DIVES JUST TALKS ABOUT THE BREAD THEY FOUND. WHOA DUDE YOU FOUND BREAD CONGRATS, HOW ABOUT INSTEAD OF DIGGING AROUND IN DUMPSTERS IN YOUR STUPID HIPPIE NINJA DISGUISE YOU LEARN HOW TO BAKE A NICE LOAF.

I know, and i wouldn't eat moldy jam, but yeast poop out alchohol when you feed them sugar.

yeast is not a mold

>18 years old
>first time living away from home, 3 housemates
>they're complete slobs, empty takeaway containers everywhere
>dishes that smell worse than diarrhoea fill the sink
>the floor is absolutely covered in fast food wrappers
>feel completely powerless, nothing I do or say will change them
>one day we get a knock on the door
>everyone gets on the floor and you can't walk a dinosaur down a hill if it has a pool full of phones. Suddenly mattress rings.
>but who was alcohol
>yes

Dumbass. :^)

I do love it when someone stupid tries to fit in and completely blows their cover.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panty_&_Stocking_with_Garterbelt

>tries to fit in
Not that user but what do you mean?

You god damn philistine.

Then stop splitting the bill.

All moeshit is the same you absolute mastermind.

I live with 4 others
Someone yesterday had used the bread knife to slice garlic.
Also they all seem to love putting beans in Bolognese sauce.

Apart from that there are no major issues.

>beans in Bolognese sauce
This meme needs to fucking go and stay go.
I've known people that did this.
Known.

Fgt

>Indonesian crayola comic board
Best one yet

No issues with people not washing dishes?
Nobody pisses behind the toilet like a dirty faggot?
Nobody plays loud music and sprays the house with Axe?

How fucking lucky are you?
You can't possibly live in America.

To be fair it DOES look like human twilight

First day off of /b/? Don't worry, you'll adjust soon enough.

Funny because most people on this board would bitch and complain about this situation, probably making threads about it weekly.
Kudos to you for not being a man-child and dealing with the situation probably.

>being so poor that you need to live with a stranger to pay the rent

Roommates don't cook so the kitchen and all of its dishes/messes are mine. Everyone either eats microwaved food or fast food. I'm the only one who takes out the garbage. One dude filled a fridge drawer with hot pockets and only cooks hot dogs in a pot. His room (and him, he's black) smell like absolute shit. Everytime he opens his door the stench wafts throughout the apartment.

Pic related. It's filled with hotdogs now.

Its not awful desu. I usually make a 3-5 dollar profit per person for dinner meals. Sometimes I make lunch and breakfast too but I just pick up 2-3 bucks a person for those.

>I watch children's cartoons and brag about it

Are you the original LOUDPOSTER?

Man this would have been straight up God tier if you just wanted to trash OP

>P&S w/G is a kids show
Whew lad

aren't hot pockets supposed to be kept in the freezer

>dude why are all these people at the gym lifting weights?

homie you played yourself

It is a fungus.

Mold toxins, or mycotoxins are highly resistant to Temperature and chemical destruction. Do not eat, unless pure desperation. What worse the body does not dispose of them well and they have an additive effect b/c of it. Mold is everywhere and you can eat only so much of it before deleterious effects appear and cannot go away without hard core air purification systems.

Random migraines, joint issues, brain issues, and global inflammation.

The worst is these fuckers do not boil away, and can remain active and have an intact structure in a pressure cooker for 5 hours.

I have the reverse.

>be innacollege
>university has suites with kitchens
>like everything except an oven
>roommate brings some short ribs marinating in a bag a couple weeks into fall quarter
>Also brings some leftover arroz con pollo
>idfk what places even serve arroz con pollo here
>be cleaning kitchen with other room mate
>get to fridge
>ribs and leftover rice still there
>FROM SIX FUCKING MONTHS AGO

Thank god the meat was in a bag. It looked like a fucking corpse.

>being poor

>mfw throwing away good food just to make people mad

> jam-mold is only surface-deep.
I've got some bad news

I don't know. I don't eat them and haven't had one in fucking years. Thought about buying some for when I only have 30 minutes for lunch.

Yes.

By your logic, people and cows are the same, since they're both animals.

>panty and stocking
>children's cartoon

>bitches about anime/weebshit on 4chin
doyouknowwhereyouare.jpeg

>t-the people swear a-and there's sexual innuendo it's an adult animated cartoon for adults like me

It might be more of a juvenile/adolescent cartoon rather than an adult one, but it's certainly not a children's cartoon.

>ahem actually I'm not a pedophile because it's hebephilia. very different you see

Why do you have to bring Pedo shit into this, That kind of stuff is disgusting. If you don't like panty and stocking or thinks its juvenile that's your own opinion, but it's in now way a children's show.

Denial.

>Why do you have to bring pedo shit into this
Because your a pedophile? LOL

Maybe if you're a blind moron.

Or an adult that doesn't watch kiddo shit.

>flatmate back in college
>bretty cool, nothing weird, kind of a fem
>asks me to pick up some sirloin and various stuff, he wants to cook for the two of us
>slicing dicing, seasonings and onions
>le kike oven time
>also au gratin taters from scratch and greek salad
>sirloin comes out looking like sliced fried gold
>take a bite, tastes good desu, everything is A+
>tell him he's a great cook.
>"I...I made it because I really like you user"

How was the anal sex?

This whole thread proves the adage if people don't know what something is, then don't regard it.

i have lived that life
there are worse things

awkward, he kept moaning like some girl out of a hentai.

wait wat

>roommates in college
>put juice in fridge
>roommate drinks the juice
>leaves only a membrane of juice at the very bottom

>go to cook something
>pick up wooden spoon
>the handle is burnt in multiple places like they held a lighter to it
>it's burnt so severely that half of the girth is gone

Like racism?

Dabs should be punishable by death. Ruined weed for many people, turned them into retarded zombies. People just don't appreciate weed in legal states while I pay out the fucking dick and risk years in prison just to make sure I'm not sick at $20 a gram.
Fuck you extract humpers.

i lived that life in baltimore, if i wasn't racist I'd be dead

One less white male isn't a bad thing.

fite me

We're on the internet, /pol/. We can't fight.

so you admit defeat
/pol/ was right again

I feel no need to defend my position when I'm objectively correct.

ok spergstein
give me another (you)

(You). We are all children in this multicultural world.

good slave, give me more (you)s, now slave now!

What is (you)r endgame?

GOOD SLAVE
MORE (You)

I haven't even watched this show and I know it's not mlp. Nice try, pleb

>dishpocalypse every time I walk into the fucking kitchen
>wash it all even if I used almost nothing in the pile
>few days later dishpocalypse again but going to work so don't have the time to wash it
>come back
>everything has been done except the stuff I used
>mfw this happens all the time

Moving to my own place next monday, I can hardly wait.

>kid show
>is called Pant and Stocking
Gee user, does it need a sign saying it's not for children?

>wooden cutting board starts falling apart
>roommate blames shitty manufacturing
>decide to buy a nice one so it doesn't happen again
>find out roommate has been putting it in the dishwasher
>tell them to stop
>they agree but keep doing it no matter how many times I tell them not to
>new, nice cutting board split down the middle after 2 months of this retardation
>all our cutting boards are now plastic
>hello plastic shavings in my food

bonus
>water is getting under the sink
>landlord can't find a leak
>turns out roommate was just being a fucking spaz while washing pots and pans

Just watch one episode and find out yourself you fucking sperg.

if panty and stocking is moe then I guess I'm not as anti-moe as I thought

Seriously. Keep defending your weeaboo pedophilia. You can look back at this conversation one day and realize how retarded you are.

>pedophilia
>children's cartoons
Make up your mind, dumbass.

>bitching and crying about anime on an anime image board

Maybe you should consider moving to another place that suits your tastes, like reddit.