Hey Veeky Forums

Hey Veeky Forums

I'm currently writing my memoir with the intention of writing the longest and most detailed memoir ever written. I have written 640,000 words thus far and have yet to reach my twelfth birthday (in the book). Needless to say there are what some may label "digressions" but they are all carefully articulated and included in order to benefit the work as a whole.

Are there any lengthy memoirs you have read and appreciated? Are there any literary feats similar if not equivalent to what I am attempting?

Thanks for reading.

who could possibly be interested in reading all that?

Christ almighty. What has happened in your life to warrant that word count? Anything even remotely exciting or readable?

It depends really on who they judge the author to be. My mother for example will read it regardless of any promotional effort, and perhaps a dozen people may be tempted to read around fifty pages if they find out about it and find the novelty appealing. I am considering sending it to establishing publishing houses, although the responses I have received from such publishing houses thus far has severely discouraged me from believing that publishing this via traditional means is a realistic ambition.

Hey, look, it's Veeky Forums's resident autist again.

Is it written as a wikipedia page?

I appreciate certain writers because they celebrate, or at least articulate in a beautiful manner the events of what may be referred to as "everyday life", or in other words the kind of mundane lived lived by the majority of people who travel from a property to a workplace and attempt in the meantime to understand what it is they desire or value in this life, and attempt to form relationships with other people, and to improve themselves somehow, and so on. Not only is my work an extremely detailed yet poetic and emotional literary narrative, it also involves profound and meaningful thoughts about life, society, the Self, emotion, thought, and human history, to name only a small handful of the subjects I cover in my writing.

I intend to upload it as a single wikipedia page and include relevant hyperlinks, images and so forth to break it up into a form which appears appealing to read. The name of the Wikipedia article will be the title of my work.

So, millions of words, most of them navel gazing.

>any literary feats similar if not equivalent to what I am attempting?
Henry Darger's oeuvre, perhaps.

you should read knausgaard's My Struggle. sounds similar to what you're doing

What you think this is

Give us a taste of your work OP

>articulate everyday life
If people could find coherence in a fully fleshed out life, why would they bother finding it in your life rather than their own? The whole point of communication is to distill away the unnecessary stuff that makes finding coherence difficult. I guess what I'm saying is: Articulating everyday life isn't the same thing as describing everyday life.

I'll post the first line if you're interested?

I'm too paranoid to post any more than that at the moment, sorry.

post it

ah, now I see how it ended up being 640,000 words

Hello memoirfag

Did you send out your manuscripts in pizza boxes yet?

Fine, here's the first sentence:

>"Then came the point in my life when I realized, with a sort of laugh, that every joke I had recently heard had been told by myself, to myself, and at my own expense."

I have not. The rather curt responses I have received from the few publishing houses who have actually replied to my emails have sullied the industry so much that I am resigned to self-publishing at this point, preferably via Wikipedia. I also have access to the email addresses of over 40,000 journalists across national, regional and trade publications, and I may be forced to send them all an email when the time comes to promote my work.

Fuck off troll

>tfw teaching robots to recognize food with my shitposting

That is longer than War and Peace already by 100,000.

Literally nobody is going to give enough of a shit about you to read that much. It's am exercise in self-indulgence and nobody will have anything to gain by reading it.

You Faggot.

The systems fucked these days, the publishing industry is broken. Might be your only chance.

OP here. My mother has already expressed explicit interest in reading my finished work. She has already read a passage or so (against my will, having trespassed into my living space and discovered the stack of papers I was editing at the time) and believes me to be nothing less than a genius. I admit that she thought this before reading my work, but having read a small portion of it her conviction has only been reinforced. That is one guaranteed reader, and should the concept of "word of mouth" have any validity then surely news will spread further afield after she has read the entire work, which I admit once more may take some time given her poor eyesight, lack of formal education and tendency to fall asleep when reading anything other than the supplements from the weekend newspaper. Also there is plenty to be gained from reading my tome, both directly and indirectly. It may very well serve as the most profound insight into a unique human entity ever offered to the reading public, akin, I can only hope, to Fernando Pessoa's "The Book of Disquiet" although structured, unlike that book, in such a way that a reader may witness the development of a human being from conception, from the native joy of infancy, through the turmoil of an unhappy childhood, into the frustration of the teenage years, and beyond that into adulthood and the ideological transcendence which awaited him (me) there. It features articulate, lucid and often poetic passages about every subject that you can imagine, in addition to original theories expounded at length and often with citations and critiques of the writings of Otto Weininger, Mitchell Heisman, William H. Whyte, Dr. Theodore Kaczynski and many, many more philosophers, sociologists, psychologists and other thinkers.

This is the guy of the delivery system and manifesto. He's getting boring.
Ignore. Do not bump this shit. Remember to SAGE.S

This is a tongue-in-cheek meta-post regarding Tristam Shandy, right?

Oh haiiii Proust. Y u so mean 2 Joyce. He just wants to be ur friend. He's a good guy, c'mon.

PS Could you put in a good word with Gallimard re: my Roman a Clef?

i would buy it desu...

>yeah, it's that one resident aurist

>My mother
Kekked

you know man, that whole "my diary desu" thing is actually just a meme.
you didn't have to actually go and do it.

Honestly, I think I'd flip through it and see if it hooked me. Good luck, you do you.

>it's that guy who writes 400 word posts thinking anyone believes them