Which would you rather have, Veeky Forums?

Which would you rather have, Veeky Forums?

Top. Mushy asparagus is worse than death.

What is that even supposed to be on the bottom? Ew.

Well, obviously it's asparagus. What's less clear are what those ominous white chunks are.

neither, it make my pee smelly funny

Top. Mushy asparagus sucks ass.

I hate when folks say this.
pee smells anyway, I'd rather mine smell like asparagus.

give me the charred top pic, but I'll eat mine boiled, charred or sautéed, just give me more than that, I cant get enough

"Real" grated "parmesan" on "steamed" asparagus?
Tinned would be better.

Who on Earth would prefer the bottom? I like my asparagus to have a bite.

The second, because it is completely contained within the plate. Who knows what the other one has touched on its way to the table.

top because it isn't mush, although the neon green color is putting me off a bit

>neon green
that's the color of nature, user

maybe nature in the vicinity of a chemical nuclear factory

Ever blanch any green veggies, dumbshit?

Ever salted your blanching water, dipshit? Ever iced the cooling water, dipshit? Ever fucking cooked like a pro?
Also:
>implying theyre fucking blanched and not just stovetop seared and oiled
>implying you cant fucking tell from the left one that its still crunchy
>implying green asparagus isnt best when still crunchy raw
>being a gastronomically illiterate flyover who should stick to his bag of cheetos

>cooked like a pro
>blanching

Yeah, something illiterate grandmothers have been doing since time out of time and flyovers with large gardens do today when freezing excess produce is professional. What other professional tips do you have there cook boi? How to use a can opener for your sysco heat and serve trash?

Salt. Your. Fucking. Blanching. Water. Lots. That's what makes the greens keep their green. That's what actual chefs do, as opposed to illiterate grandmothers who make a brown, overcooked mess of everything and then toss shit in the freezer. Congratulations on missing the fuckmost obvious point of a post ever, flyover. Perhaps your grandmother passed the illiteracy on.

Speaking of old wives.. Can you tell which ones were boiled in salted water?

Topmostest kek! Cook boi BTFO!

top
but if those were green beans
bottom

Top one u stupid cunt
Fuck what a dumb question just delet yourself off this planet

top. soft cooked vegetables go in the compost.

>I hate when folks say this
Why?

>I can't get enough
You sound like a fetishist that loves his stinky pee

Entered this thread to find out what happened to perfectly good asparagus, and now I want to know if this "Grandmother" is hot. Like, fuckable on the kitchen counter hot.