Veeky Forums starter kit dump

Veeky Forums guy here
what is the absolute minimum food that you should be able to cook to not be a degenerate. the bar should be above a pb&j sandwich so I´m thinking omelettes and spaghetti. Then let´s talk about intermediate and pro cooking skills that can be achieved by an amateur

if you fuck up any of the following you can't call yourself a cook

>roast
>melts/grilled cheese
>easy pastries like french toast
>eggs
>spaghetti
>antipasto
>burgers
>cake

what else am i missing?

>roast
do you mean like roast beef?

Roast chicken is one of the simplest, impressive and most rewarding things you can master. Julia Child said a restaurant should be judged solely on the quality of their roast chicken. As a home cook, you can surpass most restaurants with that dish.

Make the fried kidney like Bloom ate in "Ulysses" that he liked because it had the faint flavor of urine.

what cooking does an antipasto involve

user since you Veeky Forums you might find "On Food and Cooking" by McGee useful. It'll help you understand the science of how to cook which will help make basic preparation the core of your cookingshit

Just don't burn it like he did.

i'd say rice and pasta are entry-tier shit that only a degenerate wouldn't know. its like fucking cereal, except its water instead of milk and you gotta heat it up.

then i'd say meats are just over the 'degenerate' bar

Why does it look so much like a big juicy red turd?

I really wanted to refute you but that honesty looks like someone shat it out.

I'll make sure to tell the next cow to grow prettier organs for you ladies.

You're the one eating piss filters to prove your manliness.

I eat it because it's good. Doesn't even taste like piss if you soak it for a few hours first.
Fruits are basically genitals. Are you too much of a fucking pussy to eat an apple as well?

He burnt it because he was literally cucked by by his bitch wife Molly.

"—Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuck Mulligan clucked lewdly. O word of fear!
Dark dome received, reverbed.
—And what a character is Iago! undaunted John Eglinton exclaimed. When all is said Dumas fils (or is it Dumas père?) is right. After God Shakespeare has created most."

Poor Leo

Start with the french;
Onion soup, beef boeg, omelette, whatever
Get yourself a copy of larousse, and aim for one new recipe a day
Learn about your ingredients and the methods used to make food, and take the time to produce dishes you are proud of.
Best of luck kid

You should know the basics of sautéing meat and vegetables, and how to make pasta and/or rice in a pot.

Learn to cook eggs in every way possible, then expand out. I'm talking over easy over hard over medium, omelettes, hard boiled, etc down the line.

If you can do all that you can pretty much cook anything.

>Start with the french
That's actually good advice. Much like the Veeky Forums equivalent.

This looks more like a shit, than any shit I've ever even shat
I'm sure it's p good though, kidney is tasty

Hot breakfasts to start. Eggs in every style (start with scrambled, then learn fried, poached, omelettes, etc), plus ham, bacon, sausage, hash browns, biscuits, toast, oatmeal, etc.

Other than breakfast, learn to grill. Start with basic stuff like steaks, burgers, pork chops, chicken.

Learn to sautee and stir-fry. Stir-fries are cheap, easy, delicious, and healthy.

Learn to use some basic seasonings and spices. All meats need a dash of salt and pepper to bring out the flavor. Learn a couple basic spice blends (Cajun, Mexican, Italian, and Montreal steak seasoning are good starters.)

Learn your mother sauces. Google "mother sauces". Learn them. Once you have those, you can make hundreds of variations to suit your taste.

Learn some staple comfort foods. Everybody likes roasted garlic mashed potatoes, and mac n cheese.

And like everyone else said, learn your basic French techniques. Love 'em or hate 'em, the French literally wrote the book on essential cooking skills.

learn to make your own fresh pasta, it beats the store bought shit anyday of the week. Unless you live in Italy.

I have no interest in soaking a kidney for hours to make it palatable when I can buy a heart or brain for a similar price and leave the kidneys to retards who will think it's just as good.

Yeah, because fucking heart only takes a minute, right?
I wouldn't say kidney is better but it's different and I for one don't have the same meal over and over every day.
If you think placing something in a bowl of water a few hours before you intend to cook it is some kind of soulcrushing chore you probably shouldn't be on this board. Or on Veeky Forums for that matter.

That's a good point. Sorry for being a dick. Pic actually looks like a really nice cut. My local butchers are a joke and buy their shit from another place and then cut it up/grind it etc. so I can't get kidneys easily here.

one dish you enjoy for
breakfast lunch and dinner