Stop eating lobsters

...

Just fyi, Maine lobsters are the throwaway lobster shit show that is canadian lobster.

Fuck.

There's no need to boil them alive though

The nervous system extends throughout most of their carapace, stabbing it in the lower neck region is more of a kind gesture than just throwing them in the pot.

F

Nice! Hell of slap down.

Bet you wish you spent a little more time in school now huh?

water skitters off a hot pan
are we to infer that water feels pain

Fuck off vegimatic. Go eat some grass while I boil 2 lobsters in your mal-nutritioned face.

D A V I D
F O S T E R
W A L L A C E

>Not damaging lobsters for no reason.
>damaging lobsters so I can eat them.

>Stop eating lobsters
Meme food and an excuse for fat rich pigs to drink butter. Literally no difference than a fucking bug save for the difference that they live under water.

>they've never had a good lobster roll

Why? Other than it being overpriced.

...

>moral realist
If I don't care about how the lobster "feels", then why should I not make my lobster suffer before cooking it?
>you should care
I have no reason to care.

real lobster rolls don't have mayo

...

woops

Stop writing bo. . . Oh wait

That gives me the howling fantods

Looks tasty

>bland baby food bread topped with overpriced giant shrimp
>it's $17 so it must be good
lol, no

Eat a good one for fucks sake you poor person. So goddamn poor.

South African lobster is the best I've had. Anyone can feel free to tip me off on other lobster.

what's so special about lobster anyway? i only hear about burgers craving lobster.

Okay.

>bug
Watch out! Looks like we've got a biologist on our hands!

I swear these posts are made my eurotrash that could never hope to afford crab let alone lobster so they autisticly screech about sea bugs and how one of the most expensive dishes in a restaurant is overrated garbage. Fucking perplexing.

My body hurt watching this

> ITT Pussy ass white male bitches cry about sea bugs while big black bulls fuck your women.

This is why white men deserve to be cucked & race mixed into extinction.

But I'm asian, and I'm not crying for the bugs. I'm crying for the idiots who act like they're ambrosia from the gods

>This is why white men deserve to be cucked & race mixed into extinction.

Threads like these remind me why the next 100 years will be the century of the Asian Male BUCK.

> little white cucks can keep crying about their food while we take over the world.

lobster is cheap compared to foie let alone otoro or a5 wagyu, silly red lobster pleb

hold on a second

I thought I was on Veeky Forums

wtf

I guess I got here through the alck thread and then ended up here and thought I was back home on lit but noo

Too much effort for no benefit to either party.

Just hypnotize the bug if you're that concerned for it.

Veeky Forums's unironic love of dfw is why I had to quit that board. He's just awful.

No need to be so insecure. Start a thread about whatever author you like.
And actually from what I can tell, most people seem to either meme his persona or shit on him. Actual DFW appreciation is rare.
I do love him, though,

F

you first Dave
oh wait, I guess you did

Only video I could find but Alton Brown's take on killing lobster. Wish I could find something better than this shit quality but w/e:

youtu.be/CpP78XAvTmg?t=4m8s

>Lobster boxing gloves
Cute!

This memes the crab

>this kills the lobster

Yes, we can't afford lobster in Europe. Keep believing what your politicians tell you. We're soooo poor in Europe and can only dream of eating lobster while we nibble on a small plate of rat. We also can't afford that corn syrup stuff you have, so we have to eat real sugar. It's pretty rough here.

that looks like shit though. It's way overdressed and celery has no place in a lobster roll.

...

Crab is better anyway

I'll probably return to trying to read it, but Infinite Jest is a tome that seems so up it's own ass that it borderline has its own dialect, with it's own appendix, and appendix's appendix.

I have other books on my reading list before I have to feel accomplished by trudging through the thing.

It's not Infinite Jest, it's from an article called "Consider the Lobster"

No, they're yummy.

>robster craws

They're the same type of lobsters.
It's lobsters elsewhere that are different.
That user was either trolling you or is just a retarded leaf.

>it's a "eeww eww icky sicky buggies, stuff from the sea is uglies, just give me tendies!" poster
Well at least one is basically required for these threads. Extra are just an indication of the underage reddit percentage of the board.

>thinking buns are food for babbies
>things that reveal you as trailer trash

They're considered great food throughout europe and asia, but then you're probably just a poor shit-monkey who can't help being OBSESSED.

Never liked lobster

t. Coastal Maine

no shit

>They're considered great food throughout europe and asia,

I really don't understand why... probably only because of price.

Taste & texture wise: crab >>>>>>> lobster

>I really don't understand why... probably only because of price.
>Taste & texture wise: crab >>>>>>> lobster

Same with Abalone... Chinks will pay out the ass for abalone, and it tastes very... meh

Put them in the freezer for a while. They go to sleep and don't react to being boiled alive. Also lobster is supposedly the best meat industry in terms of impact on the planet

>unironic

FUCK YOU I CAN'T EAT LOBSTER

>eating lobster
>the lobster was alive when you killed it

Oh, you mean giant water insects? No problem

I agree 100% about the lobster thing... but that doesn't mean DFW isn't a great writer.

I'm suspicious. That copy of IJ has clearly been distressed to give the impression that the owner actually read it.

I could eat it for days

>t

Lobster rolls are literally an IQ test

If you buy one, your IQ can't be higher than 110

>mfw so intelligent gotta yell and scream when someone likes something i dont

You seem pretty fucking OBSESSED mate.

I try not to in general.
>took marine biology class
>giant sea bugs
>no thanks

Put the thing in the fridge until it cools down and basically goes to sleep. If you want to cook it whole. If you're cutting it up you might as well just shove a knife through it's head.

It's funny how people care so much though. I guess it's because it's the only thing they have experience slaughtering for food? I mean, would they have problems dragging a fish out of the water with a hook in it's mouth and then cutting it's throat or shoving a spike in the brain?

I guess it's also the meme that they scream in the pot, when steam escapes the shell and makes a sound

Yep, when I was at the fisherman's wharf in San Fagcisco, I bought a lobster roll from some gook's stand for 20 dollars. It had some lobster scraps, along with 6oz of mayonnaise crab meat. But it was my mom's credit card so MFW pic related :>

1. Shell them
2. Put the meat in a plastic bag and smash it up with a rolling pin to tenderize
3. Cut into cubes
4. Chuck it in a frying pan with a little bacon
5. Add cup of cream and cup of white wine
6. Add mushrooms and leeks

Bloody good this way. Where I used to live I could go into knee deep water and get a bag of these in about 15 minutes, and often a crayfish too

Crayfish in NZ mate, they're a related species that lacks claws but are delicious and very abundant.

i get the sea bugs meme

i can eat shrimp, i can eat crab, no fucking problem

but lobsters just kill my appetite. i think of garbage, i think of dead insects, i think of something primordial that, if i were more connected with my neanderthal roots, i'd go stomp out immediately. its actually their tail that just does it for me. i hate that fucking lobster tail. and to think people drool over it makes me feel disconnected from humanity.

Do you get the same feels with a plate of it cooked in front of you? It's tasty as fuck and you know it's fresh as can be if you prepared it from live or gathered it yourself.