Order a "party sub" at the deli

>order a "party sub" at the deli
>I'm not going to a party

It's not like subway asks

>user what's the occasion

They are franchise wage cucks.
Also party subs taste better than civilian subs

>buying 6 30-racks of beer
>"heh, going to a party?"
>I'm not going to a party

>order a Happy Meal at McDonalds
>I haven't been happy in 4 years

>order a double cheeseburger
>I'm not 2 people

>pop a totinos "party pizza" in the oven
>grimace at the irony
>head back to my room without speaking to another person all day

>buying foodstuff
>have low self worth

lol I feel ya

>order 2 large pizzas
>clerk says "looks like you and your friends are having a pizza party :)"
>respond "actually, they're both for me"
>but secretly you're buying them for your friends' pizza party

Mom's gonna freak.

LOCK ME UP

>order a "Happy Family" at the chinese take out place
>My wife hates me for forgetting her birthday for the third time
>Her son still calls me Kyle

Get me some egg rolls Kyle.

>make my grocery store run of the day
>it's another "user buys a handle of bottom shelf whiskey and some tallboys" edition
>cashier says "h-have a good night, user...."

>ever having been happy
Think I've only really ever felt true joy on election night last year.

P. gay tee bee aych.

>call myself a chef
>dont actually cook food

>eat a dozen "king sized" chocolate bars in one sitting
>live in USA land of freedom, no monarchies here thank you very much

>Buy a box of cake mix, a pint of icing, and some streamers from the clearance rack
>"Having a little party?"
>Make a weight gain cake shake, tie myself up with neon streamers, and eat the icing off of a plate like a swine
5'11" 140lbs btw

why did I laugh at this?

How exactly would you "tie yourself up"?

running a DEX build atm

>state tax on on eating inside the restaurant
>order take away
>sit down at table after receiving food
>avoid tax
>dirty looks from chinks all around

you're drunk tee gee

Say *what*

...

>order chinese food
>have to spend at least 25 dollars for them to deliver
>buy enough chinese food to feed all the children working in factories in Bangkok
>end up eating chinese food for breakfast the next day

Were you not satisfied?

Did you leave it in the oven?

Under rated

>and some tallboys
Why