How do I boil an egg, ck friends? I need to not seem completely incompetent in front of my girlfriend's dad

How do I boil an egg, ck friends? I need to not seem completely incompetent in front of my girlfriend's dad.

is your girlfriend's mom's husband going to stand there and watch while you boil an egg

It's a large kitchen opened up to the living room. I want a boiled egg and if I fuck this up I look like a retard. He's already not fond of me.

I know one of you fuckers knows the ancient secret of boiling eggs. Fuckin help out here.

if you fuck it up you can always hide it in your pocket or something, since he's in the other room

Use a timer?

Make sure you salt and vinegar the water.
Also make sure the water is boiling first and the eggs are straight from the fridge.

sous vide for 6 hours at bodytemperature

The trick is not to boil it. I'm not even kidding.

Bring water to boil in a pot
Remove pot from heat
Place egg in water
Wait ten minutes
Peel egg
Eat

you're assuming the retard OP knows how to boil water

I'm just guessing he want a "perfect" boiled egg. I could be wrong though.

Steam for 8.5 minutes.
Thank me later...

You need to be over 18 to browse this website.

Cook your regular instant ramen
When the water starts to boil, crack a raw egg into the ramen and it will cook with the noodles.

Just like me.

Poaching or hardboiling?
seriously, heat up water(just don't the burner on max, unless you want it to be pretty unreliably cooked), have it at like 7-8 after it's up to temp(see, boiled), then put your egg in.
If you're poaching it, even easier, you can pull it out with a big spoon(wooden, or perforated, or even one of those big metal spoons you used to mix kool-aid powder into water) and poke it, if it feels like a water balloon after being in the water for a bit, that means the yolk is still liquid("soft poached"), after that, it'll start to congeal and be a little less liquidy("medium poached") and by the time it's a solid consistency that'd be "hard poached"
Just try poaching a few eggs for breakfast(one at a time, so you don't mess up several if it doesn't work out), and then try and do hard/soft/medium boiled eggs in a shell.

Honestly just don't leave it in the water for 15 minutes on high and you really can't f*ck this up, it's pretty fool proof cooking.

Good luck.

Oh and the trick to breaking an egg with one hand is to give zero cares about the shell, as long as you don't get any shell in your food.

depends

are you at sea level?

Oh, and easy mode is to boil the water, put your egg in the water, turn off the burner, and cover the thing, then let your egg sit for a bit until the water cools some, and you can take it out and it should be pretty cooked
>if it's not cooked satisfactorily heat water, put egg back in.

Seriously man, just have a spine, nobody is judging you as much as you're judging yourself.
>and if they are, they're not the kind of people you want to be tight with anyways.

You're going to make your gf's house smell like a fart. Again.

>
>Seriously man, just have a spine, nobody is judging you as much as you're judging yourself.
>>and if they are, they're not the kind of people you want to be tight with anyways.

>this

If you're going to go through life asking simple questions on an anime board, I hope that not only does her father disapprove of you, but your girlfriend wises up and cheats on you for a better, and smarter dick