Born in worthless burgerland with shit parents who didn't know how to cook

>born in worthless burgerland with shit parents who didn't know how to cook
>gave up fast food and soda like Veeky Forums told me to
>had a can of chicken noodle soup for breakfast
>had a can of tuna for lunch
>tried making eggs and they tasted like shit
>tried making chicken and it it tasted like shit
>every meal is made a hundred times worse because washing food down with water tastes and feels disgusting
>google how to cook and youtube how to cook
>near infinite conflicting information that is impossible to filter through or sort
>don't know anyone who can tell me what guides or videos are good, bad, or worth looking at
>no frame of reference or context for anything
>no vouched for, clear, easy to follow path for learning like the /ic/ or Veeky Forums stickies anywhere

Stop being a whiny bitch and get your act together.

>2017
>being terminally stupid
Retard.

Youre a fucking idiot


Just watch foodwishes

>all these fucking excuses
You suck, OP. Big fat dicks.

>WAAHHH ITS EVERYONE ELSES FAULT IM BAD WWAAHH

Are you telling me that every single one of you learned to cook entirely on your own with no parents, no helpers, no schooling, no outside influence at all?

If so that's great because you can tell me how to do the same thing

Be an hero, user.

Literally google search "how to cook ____" and go with the one that has good reviews, stop overthinking this shit you fucking faggot

no outside influence at all