How do I make these little shits palatable?

How do I make these little shits palatable?
I bought them because I have no fridge and remembered enjoying them as a kid, but the soft texture is revolting.

Every day my friend would bring two cans of these out to our makeshift clubhouse which was a broken down van in his yard. He would swiftly suck down the sausages, and then slam the can against the ceiling of the van, letting the juice drip off the ceiling and having the whole van smell like vienna sausages

He never offered anybody else a sausage

i want to ride in the sausage van

You should have called him little wiener kid until he stopped being an asshole

That's quite odd

Not sure there's anything you can do to make them taste any different. I like them drained at room temperature.

you don't

you give them to your grandma or dad who call them vienners

They sell bbq sauce ones too. So gross...

there really isnt a great way to make them taste good, you could probably have them with rice and teriyaki sauce to make them more palatable. Best simple way is to dredge them in yellow mustard until fully coated and down them as fast as possible. If you dont have a fridge get something like cheaper tuna instead, it is about the same price and is not as disgusting as vienna sausage. Eggs can also be stored without refrigeration, i would just learn to live on eggs potatoes and rice if I were you.

fuckers are disgusting, feels almost exactly like having a soft cock in your mouth

Slice thin and cook into Spanish yellow rice. Serve with black beans and hot sauce.

fry them in a little oil until the 'skin' caramelizes and peels. eat the stuck crispy bits and softer browned parts with rice.

Slice them up and put into scrambled eggs.

These things are amazing
Eat them with saltine crackers and be sure to drink the broth

I want to try one now

>remembered enjoying them as a kid,
My grandma always used to have these. Fuck, they're terrible when you grow up

Sautee them with some onions and tomatoes, season with some black pepper or crushed red pepper and serve with toast.

I kek'd really hard at this

Fry them up in a bit of butter. They taste vaguely like bratwurst at that point. I usually eat them with ketchup and mayo mixed up as a dippin sauce.

Oh and don't forget to drink the broth and make your family members get grossed out.

I just fry them up a bit and then eat em. Tastes gud.

Now I'm remembering all the psychos in my neighborhood. Like that weird kid who was four years older than everyone else, got autistically mad when anyone cussed even though his family wasn't religious or anything, and tried to shoot me with a practice arrow that one time.

Mah brother of african descendency. That's my favorite meal, but with pink beans instead of black beans.

It's funny because I also loved and enjoyed them as a kid. Looking back at it now, I realized I had a shitty palate and had no worldview of food. Sorry OP. Just cut your losses.

I pick up a few cans when I go to the dollar store. Eating my last one now. They're great except for when the broth becomes jelly. Then it tastes bad. Broth is good drinking too.

>the most disgusting post ever made on Veeky Forums

Congratulations.

They're just hotdogs in chicken broth. Quit being a priss.

Am I the only one that detests these but enjoy potted meat?

>Eggs can also be stored without refrigeration,
Not here in the US. Don't assume OP's geographical location, shit lord.

Yeah, I unironically enjoy the lil wieners. Not sure why people are so grossed out by them.

You sure about that?

>Shit Lord
Did you just assume my gender shit xir?

Are Vienna Sausage survival food?

If you can call subsisting on them survival. There are better survival foods out there. It's a convenience food.

Since you're already eating vienna sausages
>slice in half length wise
>throw on shredded cheese
>microwave
>place on saltine cracker
>hot sauce