Grocery store pet peeves?

The grocery store jester

I do this all the time.
Get out of the way, you fucking faggot.

Cartfags leaving their carts everywhere

your fat ass just walked around the store with the cart, you can walk it back up to the store.

yeah, this

I had a friend who would purposely bump carts to throw them into other peoples cars

did it at night with me an some friends to the new corvette

a dude got out of the fucking car

As an alcoholic and heavy processed meat eater I like to take short cuts through the organic and healthy food aisles and cropdust those skinny white girls with rich husbands. My farts are small and silent, but potent. Just a small pop is enough to easily blanket two entire aisles if I keep walking. By the time they can detect it I'm already on the other side of the store.

what the fuck is a csrgo shirt?
Is that what the kids these days wear?

Now that you've confirmed that I'm not invisible, and you're just a colossal asocial douchebag, I'm going to take up as much space as humanly possible until you try to put a hand on me or learn some basic manners :)

>go to the store 5 days a week because reasons
lmao I bet it's because you're a poorfad who needs to take the bus

ironically this

stop being a fucking autist user and let people get their fucking stuff, I get you wanna clog up the aisles and breath down the merchandise, but give other people some space

Like drive into the carts with his own car to bump them? my friend did that all the time with his shitbox in highschool

>being autistic in real life

>shopping
>family of 5 standing in the middle of the aisle with 2 carts
>dad on phone
>mom talking to grandma
>kids playing with phones
>ask them if they can move their carts so i can pass by
>they glare at me and the mom says 'fuckin rude people up in here' as i pass by

guess the color of their skin

Prepare to get checked.
I do it all the time to you people.
Then smile and exclaim a very sincere apology.

You do realize that autism is a disease, and people can't choose to have it, right?

>being schizophrenic in real life
>being blind in real life

I decide what I want for dinner and buy it on the way home.
I don't like planning weekly meals.

Your argument is invalid unless you don't believe in either free will or how your posting is certainly on the spectrum.

White?

Whenever I go shopping and stop for more than 15 seconds infront of a shelf, I see some cunt in my peripheral wanting to get where I am. They don't say excuse me to get where I am, they just stand there - or usually reach around or over me to get at a product. Unless theyre polite and say excuse me I just stand there now to piss them off because I'm so sick of having my personal space invaded.

people that linger infront of a shelf seemingly doing nothing without the peripheral awareness to see you waiting to get there and make no response when you say excuse me to get them to move.

niggers, user. they were black as night niggers

>Whenever I go shopping and stop for more than 15 seconds infront of a shelf, I see some cunt in my peripheral wanting to get where I am. They don't say excuse me to get where I am, they just stand there - or usually reach around or over me to get at a product. Unless theyre polite and say excuse me I just stand there now to piss them off because I'm so sick of having my personal space invaded.

Uh oh, better not do that. The badasses in this thread might call you "autistic" :(

>Cart overflowing with produce.
>Hold on let me get out my food stamps
>33 minutes later it's my turn.

FUCK NIGGERS

They're called doctors, user. Doctors.

probably white

All I'm saying is if you hover on me like a stalker and don't have the common courtesy to excuse yourself, just be ready to wait longer than you could have.

Simple social contract. You fuck with me, I fuck with you back.

P.S. I also brake check tailgaters too. nothing perssonnell kid. I just dont care what a rush you're in :)

That said why in the UK they have a coin slot. You have to deposit a pound coin, and it comes out when you the trolley.

It seems as if you mastered the art of little white girl bitchery that doesn't amount to much.

When niggers use their welfare to buy nothing but junk like pop tarts, candy cereal, etc.

I wish I could do this. I buy too much or I'm not in the mood to have the meals I planned earlier in the week so half ends up going to waste. I just don't have it in me to shop every day though.

You've not yet mastered the art of the chinese finger trap.

The more you struggle, the tighter it is.

The trick is you loosen up and then you can go free.

You sound like a profoundly weak man. That said I also brake check tailgaters, fuck those people.

we have them at aldi here but that's it. fat retards would chimp out if all grocery stores did that

>People don't have free will

liberal detected

>That said why in the UK they have a coin slot. You have to deposit a pound coin, and it comes out when you the trolley.
They have that in the states too, at places like Aldi.
But you only deposit a quarter so most people except geriatrics and niggers don't really give a fuck if they don't get a quarter back.

Have you not considered that it's rude to stop dead in front of a shelf in a supermarket, and in fact it's you who needs to be excused?

Even worse is the obese fucks on their scooters buying more junk with their disability checks.

It's a supermarket, dumbass. Everything is a shelf.
Are people supposed to not stop moving ever?

Preferably don't loiter for extended periods, and keep an eye out for people nearby who need to get past.

People are supposed to have some awareness and consideration for others while out in public.

Fuckers with a full cart in the speed checkout.

fuck you I'm in a hurry and need the fasted checkout lane

I live in a predominantly white area and that's really not uncommon behavior from the white trash. Seriously, the Mexicans will roll up in packs of 12 and still manage to take up less space in the aisle than the trailer trash.

>When a cute girl is standing in front of a product I want to peruse and she thinks I'm looking at her and starts smiling at me.

Filthy temptress I'm looking at the mangoes not your melons. I didn't come to the super market to be seduced by a filthy whore, I came to buy healthy food.

It's kinda nice, but it's annoying to be around customers that much especially if you know what you want exactly and there's a bunch of people in the way slowing your progress.
I chat with the cheese monger and the meat guy too since I see them several times a week.

Then maybe limit your purchases to less than a hundred beetus-filled items

I fucking hate that guy.

>I go to the grocery store every single day and get the ingredients for my dinner

>He's the faggot, riding around town on a bicycle with a baguette sticking out of the basket every day.

This isnt a french village you retard, you look autistic as fuck.

Nice cager logic

Thats a dumb thing to criticize him on. You should instead talk about how his time must be worthless if he has enough time to go shopping every single day and cook

I loosened up your mom's meat hole last night.

Your time is worthless if you spend 10 minutes after work to buy food? Makes sense

>excuse me your in the way
>left side of aisle completely open
fuck you lady go around me

what if his time is so valuable he can afford to waste it?

uhhh, aren't all food stamps done with EBT cards these days? I worked at a grocery store mate, it's just like sliding a card.

Also, be thankful they had produce. Most of the time it's soda, chips, frozen dinners and other absolute garbage. Then they pay for $200 in liquor with their own money.

I live in the vicinity of Jungle Jim's, holy shit this. It is amazing how many people go there, buy NOTHING, but block every aisle. I think I know how native Hawaiians feel about tourists now.

Autistic Screeching: The Thread

I do this all the time. If they don't feel like moving, fuck em I'm just reaching

>Blocking the aisles
>shopping with three generations of your fucking family : why?
>Leaving carts all over the parking lot
I am pretty lazy, so when I call you a lazy fuck, you're a miserable lazy fuck, blocking parking spaces, leaving shit around, leaving trash and drinks in the cart, who raised you? Hyenas?
>kids playing on their tablets the whole time
You're fucking up civilization. I saw a 200 pound 11year old Mexican kid just laying in the aisles playing with a phone. Literally laying on the ground. What the ever loving shit?

maybe it's just a small town thing, but when people see other people they know and proceed to stand in the middle of a busy aisle to have an hour long conversation. i work at a grocery store and have no patience for this anymore

>work the seafood case
>customer comes up
>"Hi, how're you?"
>customer doesn't even acknowledge me
guess I'll go fuck myself then

also: i might just be a salty employee but this shit

youtube.com/watch?v=ccHC91aaSbg

old women expect everyone to get out of their way
they are the worst drivers for this reason
if you ever see an old woman driving at you in a parking lot you had best fear for your life

Politely say "excuse me"

1) People who stop their cart in the middle of the aisle, then proceed to block the entire aisle while making their decision. Extra points for folks who don't move when you politely say "Excuse me". Extra extra points for people who, when you loudly say "excuse me" look at you like you're an asshole.
2) People who stop, then go, then stop, move, stop again, and just generally don't pay attention to anyone else.
3) Kids running around. I've tripped some little bastards before.
4) People who take forever to pay for their groceries.

Of cousre it had to be a nigger

aka

ITT: Autists complaining

Shouldn't be difficult to take up as much space as possible considering your kind are frequent consumers of (and often encountered near) soda/pop, chips/snacks, and cookies.

Oh, and
5) People who ride in the scooter carts while in the store, practically run you over, drop their cart off at the door upon exiting, and then walk with no apparent difficulties or disabilities to their car.

People who come into my line with a shit ton of clothes, then tell me as I start bagging them that they don't want any of the hangers. Motherfucker, take the god damn things off yourself as your put your clothes on the counter, it literally doubles the amount of time you spend checking out if you make me do it, asshole. Also, if you go through the speedy checkout with too many items you better be prepared to get your vegetables and fruit squished.

I work in one, in the deli, so

>people taking forever to decide what they want
>people asking for 100g of a salad when we have small, medium and large containers making us weigh it over and over until we get the perfect amount that they want
>people ordering sliced meat 15 minutes before closing
>people dinging the bell when we can fucking see them
>people asking for 400g of shaved ham. what the fuck is wrong with you

Fucking this bullshit

Women.

Women are so self-absorbed when shopping, they manage to do shit like hold their cart (or stroller) against the right isle, while browsing the left one. Women have zero environmental awareness, or are just egocentric, but probably both.

slash tires

This is exactly why I quit working the deli. The fucking shredder
>Yea I'll take 4 pounds of shredded ham
How about no go fuck yourself.

I couldn't find a better picture, but this here is what makes me angry like nothing else. Instead of pushing the cart from behind, where the fucking handles are, they pull it from the front. Which means they're standing off to the side of it and taking up double the width, blocking the entire aisle.

Time has given up on them, so why should they bother?

...

This
Fucking
SHIIIIT!

Listen buddy, just because you're a wage slave and your insane fucking life is empty outside work doesn't mean I need some kind of commentary about the shit I buy. Just let me buy donuts, condoms and mayonnaise in peace. No questions.

I Had a customer try to get me to put a bone in ham on the slicer once.

>Hey I know you're closed, but can you slice this ham?
>No, its bone in. The band-saw is currently locked and I"m not unlocking it after hours because it's a fucking 40 minute clean up.
>But i want sliced ham!
>Buy the pre-sliced ham I have over there.
>I want fresh sliced thin!
>Customer proceeds to complain to the front-end manager. I just shrug and return to my post-closing facing.
Fucking bone-in ham doesn't slice thin very well, mostly just crumbles at anything less than half an inch, these idiots wanted it to be like... fucking 1/16 of an inch.

Didn't you read the original post? There was a father.

>never abandon carts regularly
>finish shopping with lazy sister
>she convinces me to just leave the cart in the empty space next to me
>do so
>300 pound woman veers into parking space
>slams her car into the cart
>gets out
>yells at me- fat face flapping in the wind of her rage "your cart hit my car!"
>get in car
>peel out and speed home
I think she was trying to spark a fraudulent lawsuit.

When the store has those awesome small carts that are easier to maneuver and not all fucked up and wobbly, but the fuckers who bring the cars in either leave them behind or hide them in a corner behind all the giant crap carts.
Or when they don't restock the baskets and just let them pile up by the registers.

I'd honestly rather juggle everything in my arms than use those fucking shitty giant carts... unless they have those nice new plastic ones that don't get wobbly.

>tfw delis in my grocery stores are always staffed by neglectful hags who act like real cunts after they make you wait 20 minutes for their precious time
I always hope they'll accidentally run their fingertips through the mandolin- worthless whores.

had a chimp do that in front of me once, her cart was way more full too and she started unloading her items on to the belt before she was corrected
>WHUT! WHERE DOES IT SAY 12 ITEMS
>right there ma'am
>OOOOOH! THIS IS A DISASTER!

>several self checkouts crowded together
>all the normal people make one line waiting for the next available one
>fucking retarded mongoloids completely ignore the people in a line and run up and stand next to one
>"Excuse me, mam. MAM THERE IS A LINE!!"(its always a woman)
>cunt pretends to be deaf

Seeing someone you know at the grocery store. Dont talk to me, dont wave at me, dont even look at me. Not until ive had my morning sip of Rockstar Recovery, the absolute best way to wake yourself up feeling fresh and focused.

I always try to be as fast as possible, specifically because I hate this too. Unless they're a bitchy middle aged white woman who treats you like a slave.

go shill your kidney stone water somewhere else

wouldbe retarded. usually items are on sale on a specific day, if they arrive beforehand they are stocked until that day. just go to the store early.
stop looking at an item for 3min. and blocking everyone. goddamit, can't even imagine what would happen if someone would stand in front of your doritios.
a logickal mind, appreciate it.
that's actually realy strange they also imidiatelly come closer. like they take every inch you give them, even if you can't work as fast then, ending up costing more time.
retarded faggot, hope somebody shouts "MOVE!" at you once :> aaaalso what do you need 15+sec for?
yea, nice isn't it.
"Hello :>:>>>"
-silence and their prayer for your painfull dead as they pass you by.
say "hello" or great them somehow instead of an autistic e-e-eex-cuuuuse me
?
I ... I just hate customers. and annoying bosses. screaming and beeing a stupid bitch doesn't make people work better.

Yeah? You know why? It's cuz your a fatass.