Use real Parmesan you cheapass fuck

Use real Parmesan you cheapass fuck.

You are the grinning leech of the presidential impeach.

Don't forget a little dash of...

CAYENNE

They honestly don't sell it at my store.

Who is the chick next to him?

>*Chef John jams cayenne down his cockhole.*
>After all, you are the master of your piss blaster.

I once bought real parmesan
didn't use that shit in time and within a week it was moldy and gross
never again fampai fuck that overpriced shit

I've been toying with the idea of ordering it online, I have ordered perishable food online successfully before but it's been a long while and it's still strange and hard not to perceive as risky, if I could get like a quarter wheel at a time though I'd probably actually save money

This is my problem. Shit molds way too fast and I am never able to use it all in such a short amount of time.

Give it the ol' poka-poka

"We're employing chef John's 'wrap-a-damp-towel-around-the-bowl-so-it-won't-move'-method."

This week's Binging with Babish is the first time I've seen chef John referenced anywhere.

What is used as "fake" parmesan cheese?
I've never seen it,but then again I almost never buy it.

Did you get legit parmesan from a block that you have to grate? Because that stuff you can just leave out unwrapped and it wont go moldy. I have a block of it and grana padano sitting in a bowl on my counter that hasnt molded and ive had em for like three weeks.

What the fuck kind of parm gets mold within a week?

I buy the imported expensive stuff often, and it can easily go for a month with no molding. It's a hard cheese.

...

Parmesan doesn't expire easily, so you'd be pretty safe ordering it online.

It's parmesan-smelling fermented milk sludge cut with cellulose (made by refining wood pulps).

Seconding this If you buy a wedge or wheel of parmesan that shit should last at least a month refrigerated, probably at least half a year in the freezer.

it's so expensive where I live tho

I do. Great thread broh

I like pic in the same way that I like taco bell.

Sure the real stuff is objectively better in just about every way, but I practically lived on that shit as a poor student and sometimes I get a weird nostalgic craving.

Says the guy who eats instant fucking potatoes

Yeah, same here.

Today we're going to be making a nice simple serp

>Implying that wasnt pure shilling

>tfw you find out Chef John has a FetLife account and you can't watch his videos anymore

I would but they don't sell it anywhere near me

fucking kek

>this thread

How much does parmigiano reggiano cost in America? In my northern European country a 200g DOP block usually costs me about 3-4 euro. That's enough cheese to last me for a week, at least. Is it really that much more expensive in America?

These are actually the best instant potatoes I've ever had. No joke.

3 pounds go for around $30

I first heard of chef John through a YT gamer channel: robbaz.
He was do his cooking show"cooking with the kock".

>Who is the chick next to him?

Ru Paul

I like him because I don't cook that often, I'm still learning and his recipes are simple and his videos are easy to follow.

3-5 dollars for a wedge.

I don't know how good it is though. I am new to cooking.

So basically the same price per kilo. Maybe a little bit more expensive in America. Can you only buy the big pieces? I can definitely understand why you wouldn't buy it if you only could purchase a gigantic block of the stuff.

Euro here

200g block costs 5€ where I live and I use like half a block for some dishes like alfredo

shits expensive

all cheese is fermented milk sludge though

DOP unpasteurized from Aldi 250g cost under 3£ today, wanted to make a carbonara but forgot to buy cream, peas and the other abominations the savages add to theirs - yes I know it should be pecorino, but i got the cheek bacon so fuck off.

Me too

>into BDSM

I didn't think I could love the guy even more. That guy, with that voice, doing BDSM stuff. How is that not adorable?

>How much does parmigiano reggiano cost in America?
Texasfag here. Usually around $18 per pound for the genuine stuff. You can also get the rind only for about $5/lb (a fantastic value for pasta sauce).

Yes, it's expensive, but IMHO it's well worth it. It's so much more flavorful than the cheap shit that you don't need to use anywhere near as much of it.

I heard someone posted a screencap here of it once but i cant find it please post

>From rape

!!!!

parmessanio oreginano

Lucky you, a wedge of parmesan is about 10$cad in Ottawa

How large a wedge? Without a weight the price is meaningless.

>cheapass fuck.

I use real parmesan BECAUSE I'm cheap.

I buy a wedge which I grate whenever I need some. Buying anything else is a rip off.

get you a man that knows what he wants in the bedroom and you got a man that knows what he wants in the kitchen

2,50€ for a full dish isn't bad.

200g seemed to be the average we were working with

I do, it's about $12/lb for the 24-month aged stuff, it lasts for many meals and definitely tastes better than the fake or Wisconsin stuff.

Has anyone else ever just eaten an entire 200g wedge?
Not something I'd do again but fuck me it was the first time I'd ever bought the stuff and I was not prepared for it to completely redefine my relationship with cheese. That crumbly texture makes it a lot easier to just go in on, as opposed to some of the waxier hard cheeses.
To this day I buy a separate block of cheddar for use in dishes and just eat parm in treat-sized chunks.

All I've ever seen is people mentioning he has the profile with absolutely no evidence and that one pic where some random tranny is labeled as john so I don't really believe it unless someone actually has some evidence to prove it.

And the issue is, this is the only 'evidence' of the whole thing
From left to right: Sara O'Donnel, Chef John and Jolene Sugarbaker
Not that I would mind, I have fetishes, John being in to BDSM would just make him more based but I just don't believe it unless someone actually has something to show for it

Whoops, this is the pic some faggot kept reposting

I only ever used real parmiggiano, daddy.
Will you love me now?

I buy the stuff all the time and use it for weeks on end, and it hasn't once gotten mouldy.

In Chef John's accent:

>I'm going to take this hot iron
>and tease the vagina
>but not too close
>Folks, I gotta tell ya, you really REALLY don't want to make contact
>but use your discretion; this is you...doing BDSM!

>You ARE the Dalai Lama, of your branded vagina!

Check your fridge's humidity level. And store hard cheese in wax paper.
And if that fails go to your local haggen or other high end grocery store and have them cut you a block of the size you need.

Same.

this is not fake.

and i actually like it. if you're just boiling some boxed pasta and using some canned sauce, putting shaved parmaggiano-reggiano on it would be stupid.

I'm a slob who had a bad habit for the last year of letting shit sit in the fridge for months and go nasty. Just put wedges in ziplock bags. Even in terrible environments (read: mold spores), it will keep for at LEAST a month.

It's literally what we're talking about when we say fake parmesan. It's bland, completely tasteless. There's no reason to throw it on or in anything.

>freezer
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

So, you guys are telling me that products marketed as parmesan, not parmesan flavored cheese product aren't real? What's fake about them?

Aged for less time, pre-grated and caked in wood shavings and potato starch, so it loses any flavor it might have had at some point. Made with inferior ingredients. It has a very mild flavor at best, and tends to only give you the illusion of adding flavor to a food that is likely to completely overpower it. Unfortunately, tends to add an unwelcome powdery texture to things.

If you contrast it to a wedge of even low-quality domestic parm that you grate fresh before eating, you'll see exactly what I'm referring to. The difference is not subtle. The shavings have a pungent, sharp taste and smell, and remain soft and easily meld into the food without adding a bad texture.

But the last part doesn't rhyme or sound similarly in their endings

Ameicans too poor to buy real cheese

>parmesan
>freezer
MEIN NIGGER

>thread about parmesan
>no one mentions romano

wow, you guys really don't know anything, do you?

guys probably don't even make your own gravy on sunday.

You are the can-do of adding cayenne.

Any Safeway or Trader Joe's should sell it.

>thread about a specific kind of cheese
>no one mentioned a different kind of cheese
wow, shocking

A BIT OF FREEEESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.

>try out cayenne
>it's not that good

I feel betrayed.

This. You got to look in the fancy cheese section next to the havarti and the gorgonzola. Not the fridge section with the bologna and the blocks of cheddar.

It's literally just powdered heat. That's why it's good though, flavor neutral.

>tfw brainlet
>tfw only know how to cook what chef john teaches

I read the whole post in his stupid fucking voice.