Give me your family's secret recipe or else!

>Gallon cider
>Gallon apple juice
>12 cinnamon sticks
>3 cups of sugar
All together in a stock pot, bring to a rolling boil and stir in the sugar. Let it simmer for 2 hours. Add 2 liters everclear. Put into quart jars with a cinnamon stick(the ones you just boiled) in each. Let sit in dark, out of the way place for at least 3 months. When you stumble upon the juice youll remember what it is. Its good for a couple years so I suggest hiding jars behind christmas decorations or something. Dont eat the cinnamon sticks.

...

Okay, Yotsuba, calm down.

Here it is:

>Brown 4 pounds of 97% lean turkey breast
>Set aside
>Boil 8 pounds of your favorite noodles
>Drain once soggy and put back in pot
>Add 10 pounds of velvet to noodles
>Add the browned turkey breast
>Mix everything together
>Add pepper
>Wa La!

Pic stolen from google.

Chocolate Oatmeal cookies form grandma Harrison.
Have all ingredients out first
>big sauce pan
>2 cups of white sugar
>1 stick of butter (melted)
>4 tablespoons cocoa
>1 tablespoon of corn syrup
>1/2 cup of milk
>1/2 cup of creamy peanut butter (soft)
>1 teaspoon of vanilla
>2 cups of quick drying oats
>wax paper

Instructions:
>put pan on stove
>add the sugar
>add the melted butter
>add the cocoa
>add corn syrup
>add milk
>Stir HARD
>microwave peanut butter for 10 seconds
>turn stove on high
>wait till boil
>after 45-60seconds turn off heat and take off stove
>stir in peanut butter till no streaks
>add vanilla
>put back on hot stove
>add oats
>stir HARD as fuck
>like you are racing the devil hard
>spoon should stand up by self
>lay tablespoonsful on wax paper

>velvet
Should have been velveeta. Autocorrect strikes again.

>bazuca bread
Stealing this and claiming it as my own.

Do you want curry, or hamburgers? Or maybe curry hamburgers?

I'd eat a curry burger.

Enjoy! Every person I've ever fed it to said the same. I'm just happy some part of my great grandmother still makes people smile.

Cook macaroni
Chop thinly celery
Chop thinly onions
Open canned tuna, drain
Mix together with ample amount of Miracle Whip, bit of relish, black pepper, garlic salt

Enjoy, call it tuna mac

Breakfast cassarole

>Get large casserole dish
>Butter it
>Fry shredded potatoes until golden brown, make sure to not leave any of it uncooked like with normal hashbrowns
>Mix potatoes, eggs, cottage cheese, shredded cheese, onions, peppers and whatever else you feel sounds good
>Pour mixture into buttered pan
>Sprinkle bacon bits and cheese over the top
>Bake at 350 until solid and browned

my dad's still alive....

his staples included "Peanut butter surprise" which is literally this

Also dried out oatmeal with lots of brown sugar and "stew".... my dad didn't know anything about stock though. He thought you just put meat and veggies in a bunch of tap water.

Serve with a side of ketchup, you heathen.

>Ayam Masak Kicap
Wash chicken thighs and wings, marinate in salt+turmeric mix
In a wok, Fry till golden brown and strain once done
In the same wok, saute garlic, onion and red chillis
Pour in soy sauce
Add the cooked chicken
Let simmer till desired thickness

We have it when mom's feeling lazy to cook and she just pops this one in 30minutes or so

Fucking forgot to stir fry to mix them together, just before the simmering part

1 lb Velveeta
1 can canned peppers
Chilli powder, salt, cumming
Microwave until hot, serve with Fritos and cold dominoes pizza. pairs well with suicidal ideation

>my dad didn't know anything about stock though. He thought you just put meat and veggies in a bunch of tap water.
That's what stock is, bud

How the fuck are there even such things as "secret recipes?" It's not like there are limitless ways to prepare a roast beef or meatloaf. Does using slightly less pepper make it a secret?
My dad does this same thing but he uses rotel tomatoes.

post recipe/take pic of recipe pls

Bread and wine

Literally nobody in my family can cook well, except for my sister, who's a cunt. If we had a family recipe it's been gone for generations and probably involved boiled fish and extra acidic mustardsauce, which my dad loved to eat while I watched in agony.

>have a few recipes that only mom and I know
>be only child
>don't cook or bake often
>won't have children to pass recipes down to
Guess I can rely on my cousins to keep some recipes alive or I'll pass them down to nieces, nephews, or whoever falls into successor territory. Man, I'd hate to see my auntie's pound cake die with me.

The family does have a killer wet taco meat recipe I can vaguely remember at the moment though. It has ground beef, salt, pepper, cumin, garlic powder, other taco meat stuff I may have forgotten, and tomato juice.
>get deep pan
>cook ground meat in it
>add some spices
>pour reasonable amount of tomato juice
>we still want to see the meat but this bad boy needs to be juicy
>maybe add a tiny bit sugar to cut acidity
>add appropriate spices
>mix and taste test until satisfactory
Portions depend on how many you're serving. Sorry for vagueness.

Its velveeta and rotel you fucking animal

So you are saying your mom has killer wet taco meat?

chuck or round steak on the grill for 10 minutes a side, no spices or seasoning because we didnt eat salt. open a bag of baby carrots, boil them for 20 minutes. microwave a bag of frozen corn.

classic sunday dinner.

box of brownie mix make according to directions on back of box add cum and bake serve to the good people of /k/

you will never my great grammies pecan pie jimmy !!!!

"i am my family's secret recipe"
*unzips potato hammer*

Why would you let it sit for 3 months?

Ok, just don't shoot! First you look at the back of a box for the recipe. Then, when you have the ingredients that you actually have in the fridge/cupboard, throw the box away and mix however much of each ingredient you want however you want and cook it until it looks done.
My mother can't cook for shit. My grandma's cooking is good though but she doesn't follow recipes. I want to learn how to make stew like she does because it's so delicious. It usually doesn't thicken up much but it tastes the same whether it's thin or slightly thicker

>Fill bowl halfway with water
>Drop 2 pieces of white bread in
>Add a squirt of ketchup
>Mix together into a """"soup""""
>Eat while being berated by mother for having a tiny penis that will never produce grandchildren
>Try to not vomit after dad punches stomach
>Lie down on roach-infested mattress and weep silently

ill dump the names and then the recipe if anyone is interested
pumpkin sponge cake
boiled-in-soup-then-fried fries
carrot and ginger tortillette
polenta croquettes

I don't know it, that's why is a secret?

Ur gonna have to shoot me OP. I aint giving up grandma's Kugelis recipe or my mom's bacon bun recipe

my filipina grandma's chicken wings that the whole neighborhood loves
>get a big bowl and add diced tomatoes, soy sauce, ginger, diced onions, a cube of chicken bullion, garlic, and some spices
>pour in half a liter of 7up
>add a bunch of skin-on chicken wings
>cover and marinate overnight
>grill that shit up on charcoal and baste with barbecue sauce
>serve with sticky white rice

>Chilli powder, salt, cumming
>cumming

filipino literal most povverful race!!

You're dead, kid

Throw in a dab of mustard, a splash of vinegar and sub real mayo for the whip and this isn't bad if you like tuna. I also like hard boiled eggs in this.

Here's one I made as a kid and made my mom serve me for lunch all the time.
>1 flour tortilla
>A bag of store brand shredded cheddar
Sprinkle enough cheese to cover the tortilla. Put it in a toaster oven for a few minutes or until cheese melts. Take out and cut the tortilla into four sides with a pizza cutter.
Walugi! You made a shitty lunch with very little nutritional value. Eat it every weekend when you're not at school.

I miss being a kid.

Oh shit, well... fine. Here it is, my family's secret Fried Chicken Recipe:

1. Salt
2. Chicken
3. Grease

Now my grand pappy is rolling in his grave.

My brother is as redneck fisherman as you can get in southern Louisiana, but by golly does he cook what he catches and cook it well. He has this amazing recipe for a grilled redfish filet, skin still on one side, with some kinda Ritz cracker crust that he pats on like a dry rub before it goes on the flame. He usually bakes butternut squash with it, or he'll grill pork belly-wrapped asparagus. He's legitimately the best chef I know. My parents bought him a huge iron jambalaya pot last year for his birthday, and he's since perfected a seafood gumbo and a chicken and sausage jambalaya. The jambalaya is particularly work-intensive because the whole pot feeds about 30 people and takes a couple hours from start to finish.
I love my brother, man.

Fat + peppers = all flavor no burn

I'll post my great auntie's coconut cream pie recipe in the morning.

we just put cheese whizz on chips

>I'll post my great auntie's coconut cream pie recipe in the morning.
he said, but user was never heard from again ever since. Nobody would ever again experience those coconut cream pies.

This sounds pretty good. Are you sure it won't mold?

It's not really secret, just super unpopular around here. Although everyone seems to like it when I make it.
Vinagrette based coleslaw.

chicken, mayonaise, condensed cream of broccoli soup, broccoli pieces, curry powder, top with bread pieces/crumbs and shredded cheddar cheese and bake until the top is browned. I'm probably forgetting something.

What can I say I'm from the midwest.

Lotsa black pepper

Put a tsp of Vegemite or Marmite on soups and stews

That's really sweet, user

Here's how my Dad cooks his spaghetti sauce
>get pot
>add minimal oil to prevent sticking
>add mince meat
>add some salt
>be sure to stir pot
>chop some onions, tomatoes
>when there are no more pink spots on meat, add onions/tomatoes
>mix more
>added choice tomato sauce
>be sure to rinse tomato jar with water to extract all sauce
>stir
>add garlic, English sauce, some ginger
>add tabasco sauce
>stir, stir, stir
Done. Not entirely sure if this is the exact process, my memory is a bit finicky. I don't cook that much. Hopefully I might improve on the recipe one day.

>buy rotisserie chicken
>boil some potatoes until they're falling apart
>boil broccoli until you can mash them just by breathing on them

wa la

cute :3

>English sauce

What, you want me to cum in it or something you fucking faggot? I'll cut your fucking throat open

I literally don't understand this autismo reaction. I refuse you use your retarded naming. English sauce is much more simpler.

Awww somebody has a hard time pronouncing worcestershire :(

...

Why so hostile? Is it genetic?

My family member aren't really great cooks.. My mother knows how to cook all kinds of spaggethiOs though.

wuhrstuhrshuhr sauce

SpaghettiOs*

1 c - flour
1 Tbsp - sugar
1 tsp - baking power
pinch of salt

1 c - milk
1 Tbsp - fat (typically melted butter)
1 egg

mix dry and wet separate then combine and let rest for 5mins then pour small amounts of batter into a medium-low temp pan

serve with ample maple syrup
wa la! pancakes

1 c - flour
1 Tbsp - sugar
1 tsp - baking power
pinch of salt

1 c - milk
1 Tbsp - fat (typically melted butter)
1 egg

mix dry and wet separate then combine and let rest for 5mins
pour small amounts of batter into a greased medium-low temp pan

serve with ample maple syrup
wa la! pancakes

Dumb Amerisharts.

I'll never let you get the krabby patty secret formula, Plankton.

It makes it sweeter and dulls the alcohol burn. I have no idea why but it works. You can drink it right away if you want but it doesnt taste as good. Alternatively you can jar the mix without everclear and use it to bury the flavor of cheap whisky/rum/vodka

Just seal the jar (anything with an actual airtight seal) and youll be fine. The oldest we have found was about 3 years old in a tree out back and and it was still good. One mild winter it was in the crotch of a tree but it wasnt covered in snow. The top of the lid was rusted to shit but the plastic/rubber under the metal kept it fresh.

sHooter's Buffalo Chicken Wings

vegetable oil -- for frying
1/4 cup butter
1/4 cup Crystal Louisiana Hot Sauce
dash ground pepper
dash garlic powder
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 teas. paprika
1/4 teas. cayenne pepper
1/4 teas. salt
10 chicken wing pieces

ON THE SIDE: bleu cheese dressing & celery sticks

Heat oil in a deep fryer to 375. You want just enough oil to cover the
wings entirely -- an inch or so deep at least.

Combine the butter, hot sauce, ground pepper, and garlic powder in a
small saucepan over low heat. Heat until the butter is melted and
the ingredients are well-blended.

Combine the flour, paprika, cayenne powder, and salt in a small bowl.
If the wings are frozen, be sure to defrost and dry them. Put the wings
in a large bowl and sprinkle the flour mixture over them, coating each
wing evenly. Put the wings in the refrigerator 60-90 minutes.
This will help the breading to stick to the wings when fried.

Put all the wings in the hot oil and fry 10 to 15 minutes or until
some parts of the wings begin to turn dark brown. Remove from the oil
to a paper towel to drain. Don't let them sit too long, because you
want to serve them hot. Quickly put the wings in a large bowl. Add the hot
sauce and stir, coating all of the wings evenly.

Serve with bleu cheese dressing and celery sticks on the side.