Buy a chocolate bar

this
I've been working my way through a bar for a week now
I am an experienced triathlete and I make 139k a year

lol

>buy 1 bar of this
>only eat 1/4 of a square a day

How fat do you need to be to eat more than 1/84th of a chocolate bar in a single day?

kill yourself

I'm sorry if my mean post made you sad user. Eat another half a pound of chocolate to make yourself feel better.

Joking aside.

I've been practicing MMA for 6 years now, along with box for 7 years, I think I could.

As well as bodybuilding for 4 years, 1.87m for 86kg.

The speed I'm granted is mad, and so are my reflexes. I'd just have to wait for him to rush towards me and throw good punches right at his head. I'd not let him go, any mistake and the gorilla's done for. There'll always be virgins here thinking that it's impossible. Nothing is impossible with willpower to begin with, my friends. And secondly, you're not gonna do anything with the cowardly-shaped bodies you've got.

Any barely trained man can defeat a gorilla with a knife. With bare hands, it's not necessarily more complicated, all it requires is technique.

Stale pasta dude

>I eat a single square sometimes.
This. A chocolate bar is like 6+ servings to me, depending on the size of it.

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

This is my favorite chocolate. I usually eat around one section a week on a night when I need to be up for work and hadn't been able to sleep that day. It's expensive but not when you figure how slowly you go through it.

may want to trim that amount down a bit there, rations are important if you're in a desert

chocolate is the best medicine you know

nigga you thinkin laughter

Nice!

>serving of flamin hot cheetos is 12 cheetos

>bag size
>4 ounces

>servings per bag
>about 62

>Calories per serving: 200
>Servings per bag: Roughly three hundred and eighty nine

How am I supposed to eat this without dying on contact

>Serving is half a block

What you are referring to is a BLOCK of chocolate, not a bar.

Maybe if your poor Charlie, finish you cabbage soup.

I often wish vending machines sold little fun size bars for 25 or even 50 cents. Sometimes I might get a craving for something sweet but not all that hungry and not that much sugar and can't stand paying for a whole bar that I wouldnt be able to finish. And inb4
>"save it for later"
I'm not a pre diabetic lard ass and don't want sweets all that often so I don't want to have to keep up with a partially wrapped candy bar for days

That looks lecker as fuck

Isn't that the stuff Luftwaffe pilots used to carry in their gear?? Where did you buy it?

I'm not the guy you're replying to, but yes, that was the same stuff issued by the Germans during WWII (to all branches, not just the airforce). I've bought it at World Market before. I've also ordered it from Amazon.

My mother. She weighed more than me until 2 years ago and I'm 8" taller and 30 years younger.

It's always fatties that go crazy with these things. Normal people don't care about a trivial 100 calories.

When I find sellers on eBay selling the 10 packs I usually snatch them up, but Amazon does work in a pinch. My brother was staying with us, saw a tin on my desk, didn't realize what it was, and ate around 10 pieces of it. Laughs were had

>recipe calls for a chcken breast or a tomato
>there are chicken breasts and comatos 3 times bigger than others at the supermarket

The real crime is that a tallboy of Steel Reserve is considered two servings... Who drinks a half of the can and says WELP just gonna put this in the fridge and have it later

This is a chocolate BAR, you giant snatch.

They mean that u can eat 2 choccy bars in one serving, idiot. Wtf eat just 1? 1 hershy choccy bar is a kids's desert. 2 choccy bars is for adult serving.

>buy a bottle of soda
>contains two servings
Who the fuck drinks just half a drink?

>buy 1 bar of this
>only eat 1/4 of a square a day

Well, duh. No one can stomach a whole piece of that bitter anus brick in one sitting, nevermind the whole bar.

You eat a whole candy bar in a day because it actually tastes good.

>>serving of flamin hot cheetos is 12 cheetos
That's why you dig through the bag and find the biggest ones so you get the best calorie:cheeto ratio.

>hersheys

The big-name retailer I work for sells tiny bars of chocolate the size of a tiny LED flashlight for 80 cents.

Doesnt stop people from buying them by the whole cartonful.

hershey bars are sold at my local supermarket as an exotic american import and costs twice the amount of premium chocolate bars that actually include cacao

You aren't actually supposed to buy American food in other countries: it's just there as comfort pickups for American tourists.
t. American who regularly bought $5 boxes of Kraft mac and cheese while studying in Budapest

Funny, I was eating one of these yesterday and it was already broken in half when I got it.
That definitely made it easier to have one serving.

>t. American who regularly bought $5 boxes of Kraft mac and cheese while studying in Budapest

I also went to the local bakeries often and ate out with my friends, but my mommy raised me on the blue box since she's a shit cook and it's comfort food for me.

They do that so retards that glance at the nutrition facts see "Only 120 calories!"

lmao
Math PhD here, 600k starting

>Math PhD
>600k starting

Funniest thing I've read online today, thanks user

do americans really know how to do this

>consumed a little over a cup of coffee's worth of caffeine
MOM'S GONNA FREAK

So I'm not a /sip/ addict

Only place I can find vanilla cream soda and beef jerky.

What? I thought jerky and cream soda were popular in all of western society

If it involved statistics in the financial sector it's more than possible and in fact a certainty.

>he doesn't know the joke

>an american studying in Hungary

LMAO, what a waste of a student loan. What were you studying, the history of vampires or the development of the feminist movement in communist satellite countries?

No. Salaries over $300k are basically unheard of even in finance. Once you get into the mid 6 figures total comp, the bulk of the person's income is usually in the form of bonuses, options, and so on

Still a chocolate bar, albeit a shitty one.

>Americans

I actually was a history major.
>LMAO, what a waste of a student loan
Didn't spend a dime of my own money since the army paid for it:^)