What is the modern day version of Lembas?

What is the modern day version of Lembas?

Hardtack

Kraft Dinner

Energy bars

For me it's oats (TM) - the most depressing but nourishing breakfast in the world.

Cliff Bars

Wounder bread

Nutraloaf

The McChicken Double

>tiny 2.25oz bag of dry-roasted peanuts
>370 calories

Jesus Christ peanuts are caloric. If I had a marching army to feed, I'd give them tiny bags of peanuts.

>Caloric
That's not actually a word.

Enjoy watching half your army of decadent milennials die of peanut allergies

It is, but it's an adjective not a noun. That's why his caloric sentence sounds retarded.

I have made grammatical errors in this post. Can you find them and correct them for me, user?

It is now.

>caring about English language rules

Do you let webster fuck your wife with his dictionary u cuck.

What a well spaced post.

Bacon.

Twenny bars?

heteronormativity

except even better

Soylet

>oats
>depressing

Do porridge with milk instead of water and try adding some flavourings then you sad bastard.

I fucking love me some semi-skimmed porridge with a dash of cinnamon and nutmeg, or a spoon of jam mixed in.

That's Mordor cuisine if ever there was any. Horrific and soul-crushing, but keeps you alive one more day to work in the system.

Jesus, I didn't even know that was real. That's horrifying.