Post Rogan meals

>tfw you have 2.5 million followers grovelling at every post you make
>tfw you can't cook for shit
>tfw it doesn't matter because people suck your shit
>tfw

I was gonna post the same thing, but I don't think that's ezekial. That looks like wheat bread.

he "cooks" like a college freshman jock. like he just realized mom isn't around to limit him to one egg in a sandwich, why not stuff it with as many eggs as possible.

Egg soup with full size croutons and pepper relish

W-whats the red stuff?

looks like it might be choppped pickeled cherry peppers, sometimes called 'hots'

could be this or somethign similar at least

How does someone cook as many eggs as him and still suck ass at it? Like this fucker eats 8 eggs a day and still can't fry an egg without making it look like a ball of snot?

looks like sambal

Oh The irony

>eating eggs

Yikes. All that immune response

>while I enjoy eggs, how the fuck can he eat this without it getting everywhere? jesus christ this triggers my autism

he puts jalapenos and eggs on every thing he cooks.

who is this guy? why are his meals always looks disgusting?

...

Someone who knows how to eat healthy and get big

What does not knowing how to cook eggs have to do with getting big?

>eggs from my yard
based rogan
you're fucking nothing if you don't have an eggplant in your yard

disgusting, do americans really eat this???

>spicy eggs

ahh it's like I'm watching indian streetfood videos

...

Revolting

>eat healthy
dude I THOUGHT rogan was healthy
until you started posting pics of him making meals with mayo on the side

he does this on purpose right?

Well he is American, so I suppose so.

>He eats like a hobo that just got a welfare apartment.

Criticize this one, assholes.

Is Joe like Jack or some shit?

i used to think he was smart but watching his food posting makes me think he is a retard

This guy is too next level for me to judge his food

that kimchi is sad

I want to see a video of him eating this stuff

i bet he's a scarfer

does he cookie the food or does he have Jaime do it?

>Criticize this one, assholes
Sure.
It looks disgusting.

How does he not see that none of these things go together?

How do I #staywoke like @joerogan lads?

Hard to learn anything when you're stoned all the time.

>Rogan is inches away from fritattaposting

looks more like sauerkraut with shredded carrots

DUDE EGGS AND PEPPERS HEALTHY AS FUCK XD EPIC!!!!!

underrated kek

Ezekial is 'realer' than the unfrozen store bread that's loaded with crap to last for weeks on the shelf.

Savage

He still added two eggs to it man

You mean American stores don't get all their bread freshly baked each morning?

Not unless you go to a bakery. Even then it's just loaded with preservatives.

>Even then it's just loaded with preservatives.
Isn't this only true if you go to a chain bakery?

I learned how to cook half decently because I was stoned all the time. Eating food while stoned is good. Eating good food stoned is great.

>cheat meal
The gals at his yoga class are gonna FLIP

you are all cucked manlets

This is why I only get my vegan bread from dumpsters.
It lasts for months.

Rivers of grease separated by sludge island egg?

?wa la

>poached egg
That's scrambled egg in a cup

Dude has absolutely terrible presentation but I'm sure it tastes fine.

...

Fucking hell that's disgusting.

How do you fuck up eggs so badly? I don't even know what to do to make them look this shitty. What is he doing to them?

someone teach this man how to cook an egg yolk for fucks sake.

Joe Rogan is the egg version of the why can't I handle all these limes man

why

if you make your own mayo its perfectly healthy

Joe needs to apprentice under the Surly King of the Egg Fort.

>2 months since these samey ass threads stopped being posted regularly
>only new pic is OP
What exactly are you getting out of these threads OP?

He talks to them while he cooks, so they always turn out retarded

kek

The slice of completely unmelted cheese always gets me. That sandwich most certainly has a gagworthy texture.

Awful.

is this a joke?
how the fuck do you make your own mayo?

If you're going to shell out for ezekial bread, just do yourself a favor and buy a bread maker and bake your own. You can make it as healthy as you want, it'll be cheaper, and it'll be the freshest you've ever had since grandma died.

so how do i google "how to make ezekiel bread"
i mean how do i go about making a bread that's healthy, i never even knew such a thing existed

so do i google*
not so how do i google lol
if ever there was a time to reply with a lmgtfy link, that would have been it

Is this post meta irony?

Your bread still looks like shit. You're a retard.

ooh fritatta

No, you need to figure out what nutrients you're looking for in bread and find a recipe that uses them. If your looking for fiber, that's one thing. Protein is another deal. There's recipes that combine the two. You have to research for yourself.

but i thought bread was bad not because it lacked nutrients but because it had too much carbs

There's nothing wrong with carbs as long as you're not trying to do a keto diet and you're keeping your daily calorie consumption in balance.

ok
i listen to a lot of jre, so i may have some misconceptions about carbs
thx

Everything this man cooks looks like shit on a shingle with pepper flakes

aayyyy lmao you think mayo just spontaneously erupts into existence

you probably think pic related is where fried chicken comes from too

I hate Joe Rogan so fucking much. The is a vile worthless piece of shit! And what triggers me more is that the public seems to love his bullshit.

Everytime I hear his podcast, I just want to scream!

I hope Joe Rogan chokes on his shitty eggs and die.

>American bread

Why not?

(You)

really dude

I think the primary difference with ezekiel bread is that the grains are sprouted. Which is straight-up the bread equivalent of activating your almonds.

>kimchi with cheese
I think im gonna be sick

lol

>Meanwhile in Joe Rogan's kitchen...