POTLUCK?

How fucking disgusting is the concept of a potluck dinner? We used to have this shit in the office all the time and I'd never, ever eat anything that wasn't store-bought. Who trusts these fucking unwashed heathens to know how to even cook properly, much less do so in sanitary conditions??

I imagine every fat broad who brings a homemade dish to a potluck cooked it while smoking ciggies as their cat(s) sat on the counter right by them. Prepping food where the cat just walked after shitting in an unclean litter box. Traipsing little flecks of cat feces and urine all over the kitchen surfaces.

I imagine biting into one of "Sally from Accounting's" 9-fudge coconut crisco sticks and pulling out a dog hair because sally loves her 4 newfoundlands, did you know they were named after the Beatles???

Not to mention that right before "Bill from the Warehouse" made his "world famous ass-rippin Texas chili" he just fingerblasted his pregnant wife making her squirt her pregnant juices all over his hands.

Last but not least, the weird kid who gives everyone death stares but yet turns into some culinary mastermind come potluck time. You know that motherfucker is either jizzing, pizzing, or dosing his food.

Only fat chicks get excited over potlucks. Prove me wrong.

>was at one of the dinners
>i brought meatballs
>made 2 batches, one regular and the other one with broken razorblades for the dogs that shit in my yard
>forgot at the end which tray was the one without the razorblades in them

This was super nervous when they ate them but apparently I picked the right batch.

...

fuckoff back to redd.it you memeposting nonce

(You)

Since you seem sad and depressed here is a (you)

I hope one day you find happiness

why not just open up 1 of each and check?

love newfies, really cute dogs

if you think your coworkers are so disgusting that you can't imagine eating any food they've made, why do you spend even 1 minute in the same room as them, let alone 40 hours a week?

found the cat owners
i work from home.

>doesn't understand community building events
Nigger or spic? Maybe white trash I guess though. Data entry job for 11 dollars an hour that you claim to be an adult job ?

wow your so cool. I bet you don't even have a dog, you have a pack of wolves. and dire wolves too!! wow your so badass teach me to be like you.

stupid faggot.

>thinks he understands community building
>hates anyone that doesn't look like him
poltard 4chinner checks out

what the fuck does community building have to do with A) an office and B) the preparation of food you fucking dip?
>dire wolves
sorry neet, which one of your fantasy movies is this from?

>dire wolves
They used to exist I think. They were bigger. More dire than regular wolves.

...You work at home yet there's office potlucks you hate? Just don't go you fucking dumbass

>Not to mention that right before "Bill from the Warehouse" made his "world famous ass-rippin Texas chili" he just fingerblasted his pregnant wife making her squirt her pregnant juices all over his hands.

Uh, I'm confused. Did Bill tell you this or something? That he fingerblasted his wife and then didn't wash his hands? Why would he ever tell you this?

You know I'm starting to SUSPECT that you're some kinda troll. And that you might be a neet.

>We used to have this shit in the office all the time
It says office

>Potluck

Costco cookiebois

>hates anyone that doesn't look like him
Nope just believe the social norms of their society is garbage like trailer trash.

t. trailer trash

>call trailer trash garbage like niggers and spics
>call me trailer trash
What's the logic here? Just "pretending" to be retarded?

>We used to have this shit in the office all the time
>actually working in an office

I will just assume you are as bad as they are user from cubicle B7. Half of my friends are chefs so our potluck dinners are amazing.

Because it's a made up story, genius.

>office whales
>chefs
big difference, dummy, that's the entire point of why i said only fatties eat office potluck foods.

What do you bring?

literally nothing.
theres a sign up sheet so people who bring shit are the only people who can eat and my name was always absent from that list.

So why do you go?

At my last job we had Filipino and Serbian women that used to bring in lunch every so often. I used to sneak out and buy takeaway on those days, they thought I was rude for not eating their slop.

>mfw worked in foodservice for 7 years
what makes you think food from restaurants is any more sanitary than anything home cooked

i dont go. i didnt go when i worked there. i never went.

Potlucks remind me of thanksgiving because everybody who didnt have family would all gather, and bring a dish agreed upon prior
And it was always shit
It was always so much shit
Dry bland awful food

This. Lol.

Speaking of office potlucks......
My office's annual chili cookoff is coming up. Everyone is some form of engineer, so there's always all kinds of ocd weirdness. I'd like to win this year, as I've skipped the past several. I usually make a straight up "bowl of red", but i don't think that's retarded enough to win. What do?

Shit bait.

Ok. Some people aren't uptight about Sally's dogs or Bill's pregnant wife juice. That probably doesn't happen. Just let it go. I'm sure they're nice people. You should've made something to show you know what you're doing, and not some giant neurotic autist.

Make a real chilli without beans and blow their minds with facts about mexico