Deepest Darkest Culinary Sins

Deepest Darkest Culinary Sins
You will be forgiven

I'm allergic to about a dozen different types of food yet I still eat them like it is nothing. Not sure what effect it has on me since I have never tried to abstain from these foods because they are so common.

What foods? I'm allergic to fruits, including tomatoes and peppers, and I'll eat them once in a while but I get a rash around my mouth that's a bit painful for the next day or two.

I was once drunk at a friends house and starting eating some pita at 4AM, but it was halfway through that I realized that I was all of the pita was moldy.

Also another time I was drunk and wanted to eat some tuna salad but didnt want to do so much effort, i opened the tuna can and drunkenly thought I could invent a new tuna salad by dumping some bloody mary mix on the tuna. It was alright.

I still love squeezy cheese, but only on brauts. There is no other circumstance where it's good.

I dont feel happy eating anything other than ice cream, frozen entrees, and coffee.

I am not overweight at all but I think I should be. I think the guilt makes it seem like I eat more than I do

When I was a kid I mixed ham and chocolat syrup thinking that since I like them both individually, they would taste good together.
They didn't.

I break my noodles in half before boiling them because they fit neater in the pot that way, and most people cut up their noodles anyway.

unforgivable stupidity

i thought i was desensitizing myself to dairy (i wasnt lactose intolerant just allergic) when i was 7, and went from 1 tablespoon, to like a cup in a day, and then a couple days later was at 3 cups and had the worst hives. i can have dairy now though

I like my white wine over ice, and frequently drink red wine with chicken.

I love cooking meat in plastic oven-proof bags.
I unironically love Heinz.
I`m fat, but i still eat out in KFC.

Once I cooked ground beef with honey and cinnamon.

The student hostel I live in, make really bad, boring, bland food, like porridge and vegetable stew every other day so I season everything to the point of abuse with Indian chaat masala spice to make anything palpable.

Why don't you cook for yourself? I ditched hostel food a long time ago.

I literally don't know how to cook.

Same here, very allergic to a bunch of stuff according to a blood allergy test. But the only things that really bother me are too much wheat and too much milk, especially hot milk.

this destroys the fine balance of the noodle and may give you cancer

I've developed a slight allergy to avocado in recent years. Makes my throat itchy as hell but I can't stop eating it. I avoid it if my immune system is weak though.

I mean, does it change the way the noodles taste? It’s not like I put olive oil in the water too.

>olive oil in the water
i-is this wrong? it says to do this in some pasta directions

I like ketchup in my bolognese because of the sweet acidity

I ate thai sweet chili sauce with my steaks for the longest time. Not any longer though.

I eat my chicken with honey drizzled over it

From ages 12-23, i ate raw meat with sunny salt on a regular basis, at least once a week. Forgive me. My father also ate raw butter regularly as well.

I love tater tot hot dish

I like my meats more 'done' than most. its a little bit dryer and i love that

except steak because it becomes too chewy

make it palpable huh

The oil sits on top and does literally nothing. It's just wasting oil.

I like spreading avocado on my toast and drinking frappichinos

I was talking recipes with a friend and called risotto "chorizo" by mistake. He lived in Spain for a bit so he called me out on my bullshit real quick. Aphasia is a royal pain.

I eat soy daily
I'm a filthy soyboy

I'm a trained and relatively skilled cook but I eat like shit because of pure laziness and crippling self-worth issues.

I leave things un-refrigerated overnight, because I'm a lazy piece of shit. I'll reheat things that have been sitting out for several days, as long as long as it smells/looks okay. I must have the immune system of a street dog by now though.

When you pour the pasta out of the pot, it passes through the thin layer of oil at the surface, and some of the oil coats the pasta preventing it from sticking as badly and saving you the effort of immediately tossing it with oil or butter before you are ready to sauce it.

It's a minor convenience that I never bother with, and some of the oil is certainly wasted as not all of it gets picked up by the pasta, but it does have at least a small desirable effect, so I understand why it is advised. A lot of people are incompetent with pasta for some reason, totally unable to cook it by taste and unable to serve it without turning it into a solid sticky glob, so I can also see why the manufactures think they need to tell people to lubricate their noodles.

I exclusively lived off protein powder and vitamins for one year.

what do you normally eat?

I spike my homemade red sauce with ketchup

Sometimes I basically eat condiments from the fridge like mayo and relish and bbq sauce by liking them off my fingers

Results?

I use American cheese.

I've drizzled honey on my pizza on more than 1 occasion.

I felt proud of myself for finding Szechuan sauce at an Asian grocers. Rather than apply it to a Kung Po like the jar suggested, I dunked McChicken Selects into it.

Yes, I'm cancer.

I actually really like Vienna sausages

>take pot
>put on stove
>turn on the heat
>put some oil in
>fry some shit
why is this complicated?

I love eating weisswurst with ketchup.

I straight up drink pickle juice on a regular basis. It's also my go-to chaser for vodka but usually I'm just straight up drinking a glass of pickle juice

I don't like onions unless they're in something like a curry or salsa.

palatable*

ive got a room temperature rotisserie chicken in my room right now.

>sunny salt
What did he mean by this?

A ton of cooks do this. Who has the energy to cook after a day of doing it for assholes?
I do this too with vegetables. Pizza is designed to be eaten the next day too.

why in the mother FUCK are you putting oil on your pasta?
why aren't you finishing the pasta in the sauce you dopey cunt?

Like I said, I never do that, but in the confines of a home kitchen operated by the incompetent average pasta-cooker, oiling or buttering the noodles right away is infinitely preferable to letting them congeal in the strainer for five minutes while you lazily make up for not having your mise en place. You shouldn't be using so much lube that it effects the taste anyway.

You know, as unappealing as it is, that many people don't even cook their store-bought jars of pasta sauce, right? They just dump it on top after straining the noodles. If that's the kind of process the average consumer is going to use, I can understand why they advise leaving a harmless layer of oil at the top of the water in the pot.

Specifically 200g per day
Result:
Lost 100 lbs of fat
Kidneys functioned better than ever
Thyroid went from slow to high gear and is stuck
Cholesterol down to borderline low, bad cholesterol very low
Liver function normalized
Cancer slowed to a crawl and was able to be removed entirely
108/70 blood pressure
60bpm resting hr
Body is stuck at burning fat and is shitty at absorbing it

Overall I am amazed I didn't crash and burn. Hopefully. Knock on wood.

padre I made the same thread on several boards simultaneously, plz respon and forgive

I hate soda, to me they taste like nothing but salt and they always leave me dissapointed.

Kraft dinner, ramen, frozen pizza and pasta like 90% of the time.
Problem is that I haven't been a cook for like six years. I think it fucked me up for life in that regard.

When cooking, I double-dip.

I used Jello mix as cake mix once.

>Hungry and half asleep
>Reach around too see what I can find
>Find a half full bag under the bed
>Turn on the light 5 minutes later
>I've been eating white beef jerky

you should try drizzling honey over fried chicken and waffles

good ideas. gonna give these both a try sometime

why not curry ketchup

There was a time when I couldn't be assed to make food so I just ate half a bag of chips for dinner everyday for like 6 months. I stopped because I started gaining too much weight.

straight powder or milk or water?

every time I go out to steakhouses, I always get roasted chicken.

I heat up breakfast sausage pattys, cut them up, add them to my pasta and sauce if I'm too lazy to go to the store for ground beef.

i use zatarain's jambalaya mix instead of making my own.

I once skinned two turkeys to cook a unborn fawn in whole. I skinned the fawn which had too much fur and sewed the turkey skins around it with some herbs and butter some lemon a bit of garlic hoping it would moisten the meat and the fat of it would help. did not want to waste the unborn faun. it was yummy. but looking back now even though it all made sense in a way it was a bit fucked.

I clock in , then take a massive beer shit for 30 minutes.

My calorie intake is about 60-70% ice cream.

It's ok user. I love Rico's nacho cheese.

>sunny salt

I hate honey

Hey me too

Philly Cheese Steak with Wiz Cheese.

I put sirachi on saltine crackers

I prefer to eat wings with a fork and knife

Fleshlight full of macaroons.

I just dumped ranch and soy sauce on leftover rice.

>tfw only have moon salt

there is no forgiveness for you

i use powdered garlic and onion

once i sucked a dick with nutella spread on it it was pretty good

I refuse to eat pizza unless there's pineapples on it

obnoxious tourist detected

flyover

user I...

Have eaten hot dogs from a jar.

Just those two things?

Burn the witch!

I ate the bones.

ate an entire bag of dog biscuits while stoned
on several occasions

I've never drank water

I eat Miso paste as spread

based

BEEF BOUIULLON

I wont lie, i stole it from /v/

>sunny salt

I've had wings with ranch... boneless wings