What do I cook for a depressed soygoy in my family? something that will push them over the edge

What do I cook for a depressed soygoy in my family? something that will push them over the edge.

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A trump shaped cake

Deep fried cow anus

A well-done steak with ketchup squirted on in the shape of a swastika

purchase, slaughter & roast two pigs

I should add that she's on suicide watch, vegan, and not the nice kind who cooks interesting food to fit the diet but the annoying Veeky Forums sort who attacks people who eat anything thats not JUST

one of those giant pigs with an apple in its mouth on a silver platter would be dank but i can't do that

Just give her plain tofu for days. Cook something she'll eat but hate ;).

Cut your arm off and feed it to her. Hopefully you'll die by blood loss.

careful you don't cut anyone with that edge

you have two options. One, you make a non-vegan recipe where you can disguise the meat and claim its vegan, and watch her eat it
or
make a vegan recipe, the most disgusting one you can find, and then claim you made it especially for her because you care about her or some bullshit like that

Blend together a bunch of vegan friendly shit until homogeneous and give it to her.
Also known as soylent.
Drinking soylent for extended periods of time is known to cause people's emotions to flatline since eating flavorless, textureless pulp is functionally identical to removing your sense of taste.

Get them to eat lead.

Yeah the edgy person is the one making a joke on a Bhutanese beyblade forum, not the one trying to figure out ways to torment the people he's invited into his house.

a vegan-friendly swastika shaped angel food cake with "MAGA" written on

(you)

1000 folds

I just can't see how the broken blade wouldn't just keep going forwards and kill her anyways.

It looks like it's on a fucked up angle that wouldn't hit her anyways.

fucking kek thats what i thought that the broke sword would just fly into her face and kill her anyway

Tomato+onion salad, with an omelette made out of chickpeas instead of eggs.

foie gras

Hey asshole, user already got dubs and said you're not allowed to order domino's tonight.

Make only vegan food for Thanksgiving. Make sure it tastes really awful, and when the rest of the family complains, keep pointing out that you cooked it especially for her.

The guilt of ruining Thanksgiving will get the job done.

Put her on the au natrél soylent diet and reap the rewards of watching all of her bones slowly decay due to estrogen poisoning. At the very least, she'll die thinking she did nothing wrong.

why are weaboos so retarded? user it's cute that you're trying to pass this person off as some basket case that desperately needs help but we all know that you're the real degenerate in the family and the only reason you're doing this is out of spite because even a depressed vegan gets more attention from your relatives than you, a """functional""" adult

Phytoestrogens and Disease: tinyurl com/hfxu23q
Phytoestrogens and Heart Disease: tinyurl com/zg2nh7a
Phytoestrogen and Kidney Disease: tinyurl com/jtwyanb
High soy can result in 59% less breast cancer study: tinyurl com/j8ywsra
Soy yields 13% lower LDL/Bad Cholesterol Study: tinyurl com/hhf4weq
Soy and Men Hormones Study: tinyurl com/hsu4wqk
Meta-analysis on men, soy and phytoestrogen extracts: tinyurl com/ja5s9k2 30-50% of men get manboobs: tinyurl com/zb58cbs
Phytoestrogen content of various foods: tinyurl com/z3kpvsw 220 women over 2 years soy study: tinyurl com/z4tbb7d
Meta-analysis on 47 studies no estrogen change: tinyurl com/hsm6ctb Soy Men
Review/Final Quote on
Soy being fine for men: tinyurl com/zwddamh

Cook her vegetables in chicken or beef stock. Its not vegan anymore.