To put it simply, I have to make $100 last me for two weeks as far as food goes, Veeky Forums, but I've got a problem...

>Eat ramen for 14 days
>Get turkey or whole chicken
>Rosemary, lemon, sage, thyme
>Have roast and toast with PBR or mad dog20/20
Seriously if you are struggling why are you having guests though? Is keeping up with the Joneses as important as literally eating right? If you absolutely have make it a potluck and explain your situation if the guests bail or say fuck that then they are better off not in your life

They're family I haven't been able to see in years and I don't want them to be coming all this way for nothing.

Just make it a pot luck party. Everyone brings a dish of something.
If you do it right you'll end up with all of their leftover food.
Also you're pretty retarded if you knew you only had $100 and decided to just a party. Plan ahead a bit better and get a job.

see

I have a job, and I wasn't this low on money until about 4 days ago, long after it was planned. As I said before, I was robbed. My credit union let some cunt with no proof of identity into my checking account.

see

see

Pot luck party.

Get a porkbutt roast whole, inthe bag (they're only about 6-7 dollars), and slow cook it in a crockpot for 24 hours. Make your main meal from that. Maybe some pulled pork sandwhiches or something.

Get a cheap bottle of vodka or something to use in mixers, or ask guests to bring booze if they want to drink.

You could also get a bag of beans from the dollar store and make your own bean dip. They also have chips there.

>my credit union fucked up and let my money get stolen

Then cancel your fucking dinner you idiot, Christ Jesus.

This, roast some carrots in orange juice/zest and cumin, prepare some mashed potatoes and cabbage/baby kale/sprouts steamed and then sautéed in bacon and garlic
live off the leftovers

Do a potluck or make something good, cheap, and non flattering
Make fucking good ass chili or something, it's family, not a date

better start fasting

2-3 chickens + vegetables -> chicken broth, add + rice + noodle soups + curry paste.
Freeze chicken broth with bits of chicken and veggies in some smaller containers. Unfreeze when hungary add noodle soup (or rice and some curry maybe coconut milk and fresh onions).
This stuff is not so bad, and you can survive 2 weeks.

You can cook a shitload of decent food for people on the cheap if you use ramen noodles and chicken thighs, and throw some frozen veggies in and make a simple sauce and make a ghetto yakisoba.

You could make them anything stuffed chicken breast on rice pilaff or garlic mashed taters. Would cost about 30$ then maybe exra 10 to 20 to spice it up/some veg if none in chicken. Easy meal that sounds fancyish and leaves you 25 to 20 per week to buy rice and tea with. Or potatos depending on the person.

>$50 already just for that one meal

you miss the part where OP said he has to LIVE on that $100 for the next two weeks?

tell them you've fallen on some hard times and have them each bring a dish. You can provide some food, they can each provide a little food. They'll be invested in the get together and you'll all be more connected by this

25 a week is plenty if your not a bitch

Whatever u say soy boy. Real men have to eat and protein ain’t free

You could eat your cum to keep your gains you fucking meatloaf

Your mom keeps suck me dry. Maybe I’ll charge your dad admission the next time he watches

the answer is simple

Eat your own shit then, it would be no different going in than it is coming out of your mouth

Your dad has dibs on that

No need to behave like a child user

Yeah if he serves McDonald's you retard

Do you not have a credit card?

Shit, get a better bank. It's just part of life nowadays that occasionally someone might get defraud you some way. Any bank or credit card company I have ever used fronted me the money from the withdrawal/ charge immediately and then made it permanent after the investigation a week or two later.

Shit was zero stress for me, a 10 minute phone call.

Rice and beans for everyone, then you break out some top of the line Christmas cake and everyone will be so amazed they'll forget how much of a faggot you are

t hat's fucked up, someone tried to charge $3000 on my credit union credit card and they called me and asked if it was me, and immediately shut it down and sent me a new one
your CU is bananas

that's a great idea actually, even just buy a big pork roast for the enchiladas for probably cheaper than beef
peppers cost almost literally nothing
enchilada sauce is cheap to make and cheap enough to buy
i vote for this one OP

not necessarily, this is me and i've never physically used that credit card. i have no idea how anyone stole the number.
i'd only used it twice online on legitimate websites (one for a traffic ticket and once for an old debt i forgot about) both were secure websites, if that's irresponsible i don't know how to do it responsibly

the thing about banks and credit unions is they do profile you, if you fit the "deadbeat" profile you don't get the benefit of the doubt and they won't extend you credit

I had a capitalone card for a while because I was financially illiterate when I was younger, when it worked it worked, but the one time I had to ask them for help they were fucking useless and their customer service reps talked to me like I was a crook

I closed that account a few years ago and I've only had chase sapphire, discover, and amex, and any time there's been a problem they're super helpful and nice

avoid financial institutions catering to ghetto people and keep your shit in order, that's my advice

Theyll understand if you have to cancel dinner over that.

Actually no, it's cheaper to cook from scratch.

>$100 of food last for two weeks
>also have a dinner planned for 12 people

I'm not seeing a problem here.

•Mashed potatoes & gravy
•Homemade alcohol (kilju recipe, just crash it in fridge and let it clear, use it to make mixed drinks)
•Beef Stew/Chili/Taco Soup in Bread Bowls (make your own bread, buy cheap lean cuts of meat/hamburger and fresh or frozen veggies)

That's really basic stuff you can buy in bulk and make for dinner and yourself.

>Homemade alcohol (kilju recipe...)

No, Just No! Do not serve your first batch of kilju to your friends. You will lose most, if not all of your friends, because you don´t know how to make non horrible kilju.

>non horrible kilju
There is no such thing

have you been waiting since the early 90s to post this picture

That mother fucker has been posting here for years.

>for years.
at least 20 years, from the look of it

Go buy a thanksgiving turkey on clearance and make that.

Sides can be made as cheap as possible.

I take it you missed the part about clearing it and using it for mixed drinks. Real kilju isn't cleared. It is consumed cloudy.

>1456195143094.jpg
>not knowing about PHS Guy

phs guy is dead. i was there in his last thread. i personally bumped it off page 10 (spammed threads until it was knocked off)

fuck... may he rest in pepsi

potluck

Dumpster dive and spend the $100 on lamb roasts, potato and veg at Costco. If you get sick, spend the $100 on an Uber to the hospital

Go for a shepards pie with christmas spicesyou dumb burger.

It is literaly poor peoples food but since nobody makes it anymore people will oooh and aah as you bring it out

>swedish cheese knife for the butter.

My man

make mulled wine and roast a meat, have your family bring sides.

Learn to make pho. It's cheap as fuck, and you can make it for yourself and your guests- make it an oriental themed dinner party. Buy some cheap-ish alcohol from the oriental market you'll be going to for your ingredients. Done. Thank me later.

>Buy two whole chicken at 99 cents a pound or so
>Stuff them with stovetop stuffing, trust me its actually fine
>Cut up some potatoes, carrots and onions, drizzle them with olive oil salt and pepper and have them in the pan(s) below chickens
>Add some chicken stock to each or use bouillon cubes if you have them to make stock quickly
>All you need for the birds is butter, salt and pepper really

Thats my go to 'fancy but not actually fancy' meal when I have lower or middle class guests and don't want to buy a $30 turkey or ham.

This. Jesus the financial situation is out of your control, tell your family what happened and ask them to bring side dishes. Your family should understand.

not even reading the rest of this thread, so sorry if duplicate answer.

cancel your party you stupid faget

do turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, maybe serve like garlic bread too. When people ask "what can I bring" which they will if they have any manors, tell 2 groups a bottle of wine, 1 group a pie, and 1 group a side, problem solved. You part only costs maybe 35 bucks.

In finland you might make Karelian hot pot with:
2kg of meat (pork&beef) 5 carrots 5 onions, spices, water and follow cooking instruction
Then eat with mashed potatoes infused with 1/3rd of the weight butter and lingonberry puree
Thats pretty festive(?) and relatively cheap since you can use cheapish meats due to long cooking time.

For dessert I'd make something like meringue chocolate cake where its basically just meringue disks layered with choco cream mixture in between the layers.

I assume you want everyone to get drunk but wine would get quickly over 30$ so idk, buy vodka and make a fruity punch or just ask people to bring a bottle of wine with them.

Spotted the fat soyboy bitch. Real men don't need to pay for food, they can just take it. Something a soyboy numale cuck would not understand.

This, picnic roast or pork butt is dirt cheap for the amount of food it provides. It's damn good too.

Ramen and deenz.

>$100 for 10-12 people
absolutely not. That's for one day, and you'll probably feed 8 people tops.

A fat pot of pho to feed a family will run you $70

t. my mom

make something nice & literally just steal the rest of the week's sustenance items.

You can buy about 7 chicken drumsticks at aldi's (or walmart, or whatever your cheapo store is) for around $4. Use rice as a starch and whatever veggie is cheap

No way. All you need to buy is meat, rice noodles, and some vegetables and a few spices.

Eat vegan.

I can eat 2800 calories per day for $50/month