I've never had Chinese takeout, what should I order ck?

I've never had Chinese takeout, what should I order ck?

If you've never had it then it won't matter. Get a starter platter, some random dish and some egg fried rice.

They will give you a carrier bag full of prawn crackers for free, so don't order any

General Tso's or sesame chicken combination

beef lo mein, chicken with cashew, crab rangoons, pork fried rice, and chicken fingers

Low mein. It's my fave. Pork, chicken, beef... fantastic.

>Herro???
>uhhh yeah is this dragon palace
>Yes!
>uhh can I order for pick up
>What you like?
>uhhhhhhhh do you have general tsos chicken?
>numba 475. Ok.
>can i also get the shrimp fried rice
>That all?
>Yes
>15 minute! *hangs up*

I can't find lo mein on the menu. Is chow mein supposed to be it?

Yes

Go to a Chinese buffet that isn't shit and try a little bit of everything

DUCK

DUCK

Lo mein is hit or miss depending on the place. General Tso is the gold standard of Chinese takeout. It's good even when it's not so good. And you need as many orders of crab rangoons as possible, with plenty of mustard and duck sauce.

No. It's a different type of noodle. Where the hell are you from?

I live in Las vegas but I'm from mexico

you have access to the greatest buffets in the world, use them.

I'm a poor fag, I can't afford to pay 50-100 for a buffet at the hotels.

Get some kind of appetizer sampler. If you want an entree, orange beef is ok. General tso chicken is ok too. Be warned though, this shit is all quite sweet. I usually try and get something a bit less sugary.

sticky vinegar ribs
salt and pepper squid
shanghai dumplings
pork bun

>americans
>think general tso is actually chinese

Oh i am laffin

>wah wah they're not talking about my authentic gutter oil-fried dog instestines

Everyone knows it's not actually Chinese. Nobody cares because it's actually delicious.

>he doesnt eat beef in black bean sauce

>he eats the literal spit chinese put in general tso

oh boy, keep it going.

Who honestly gives a fuck?
Everyone knows it's not legit right down to the fortune cookie.

GINGER BEEF

or XO CRISPY BEEF, which is still G I N G E R B E E F

Chicken chow mein, honey walnut shrimp, Mongolian beef, king pao (meat of your choice), sweet and sour pork, if they have egg foo young or mu shu pork try it, if they have chop suey get that too

I'm shocked that no one suggested dumplings yet, the most satisfying of appetizers.

Understandable, have a nice day

>Trusting disgusting chink food

If you value your health you will stay far away from these establishments.