You're making pasta, user? Here let me help

>you're making pasta, user? Here let me help.

YOU FOOL

delet this piece of shit

*spills tiny pasta all over your stove*

if you want tiny pasta, just get rotini or penne or farfalle like a normal human

Wait, do Americans do this?

Only the pleb ones who are too lazy to let the pasta soften up and it falls into the pot.

No, but Canadians do.

What? I just want shorter strands, idiot.

>Thinks half-length spaghetti is the same as fucking penne
Why do people get so butthurt over this shit?
I mean, the above stupidity is what happens when they try to explain why they're mad. That should be an indicator that you should just let it go.

Why do you need shorter strands of spaghetti?

It hurts his wrist to twirl the fork that long

How often are we going to have this thread?

>Twirling a fork uses your wrist
t. never actually eaten spaghetti somehow

>Need
Jesus, you're just kind of a faggot about everything, aren't cha?

Its a preference. You have them too, although you probably just call your preferences, "The only right way" or some pretentious shit.

Do you also need extra soft toilet paper for your sensitive asshole, you faggot?

>literally being this mad over pasta
Jesus, man. Ice your tits and take a breath.

Does my wording offend you? My apologies.

Until Americans learn to stop

What else are you supposed to do?
I swear Veeky Forums gets triggered by a new normal thing everyday.

>Foreigners don't know the wonder and convenience of half-length spaghetti
Wow, you guys really don't have nice things.

What's the convenience of short spaghetti?
So you can shove it in your mouth without spooling it?

Uhhhh yeah? Duh.

You sound like the kind of person who eats his spagetti with chopsticks (fedora implied, but optional)

>What else are you supposed to do?
I don't know, maybe not get tiny pieces of spaghetti all over my kitchen? If you really feel it needs broken, use a freezer bag or a clean cloth or something... If you really feel my kitchen needs pasta bombing, get the broom and dustpan.

>act retarded because you follow stupid rituals for no fucking good reason like a giant child
HURR DURR IT'S JUST WHAT I LIKE

Also you don't get "half-length spaghetti", there is no such thing. Breaking spaghetti will always make tiny bits.

>What else are you supposed to do?
Not break them?

Well if thats your issue, then yeah, whoever is breaking it shouldn't do it like a sperging retard.

Unless you are using a large stock pot filled to the brim how else are you going to fit it all inside?

>Unless you are using a large stock pot filled to the brim how else are you going to fit it all inside?
Half sticks out, the bottom gets soft in about 15 seconds, then you push it down so it wraps around the bottom

>Logically explain my preferences
>Only response: "BUT UR NOT SUPPOSED TO REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
And you say other people are engaging in retarded rituals?
Its fucking spaghetti. We're just better at it than you are.

the OP shows someone going full retard on that poor spaghetti... with added dramatic effects.

I usually don't break long pasta, but I don't really have anything against smaller noodles as long as all pieces of them wind up in the pot.

>Logically explain my preferences
but you didn't, you just uttered "MUH PREFERENCE" you fucking manchild

Jesus fuck just let them soften and push them down you triple nigger

I disagree with the term triple nigger - doesn't matter how black you are, unless you're the niggest, you're just a nigger.

That said, you can fit a lot of semolina strings into a small amount of water if soften it... and you should be using 4-6 quarts per pound.

>but you didn't
I didn't even have to say it. You people already know why shorter spagetti is better, you've just got the autism and everything has to be done THE RIGHT WAY REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Help yourself out here:
Stare deeply into pic related.
Now say it with me: "This is fine. I don't care."
Repeat until your insanity goes away.

spaghetti is supposed to be soft you kitchenally impaired, it doesn't matter how long it is to fit it into your stupid fat mouth

As long as you promise not to do that in front of me... because I will call you out for being intentionally odd.

There are other ways of making shorter spaghetti - cutting it on the plate (or between boiling and saucing if you want to get really weird with it) cuts out the shrapnel... but as I said earlier in the thread, having to sweep up that shrapnel is all that bothers me about it.

I mean yeah. For that, I just aim the bending portion of the noodles into the pot and bend slowly.
OP's pic is just silly.

>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Consider the little exercise I posted to be your homework

I split it to 3 pieces

Almond butter and jelly sandwich.

I don't understand what's going on in this picture.
He has 2 handfuls of pasta, and he's banging the ends together?

When you wrap spaghetti around your fork like this, it has a really good texture. When you break it, you can't wrap it around the fork as well, so you lose something. It's fine if you like to break it, but it'd be like tearing a slice of bread into pieces and then just throwing sandwich fillings on top. Technically it's the same thing and you can still eat it, but it's lost something.

Hi, I'm American and I will NEVER STOP. That means we need this thread up every buttfucking day. I'm talking about a 24/hr 7 day a week operation round the clock. I want you non Americans sitting, staring, sweating, shaking and quivering with anticipation for one single (you) from an American. Just one FFFFUUCCKKKKINGGGG (you) from an American so you can boil over and say, "LOOK AT THAT!!! DO AMERICAN REALLLYYY DOOO THIS???!?!?"

gonna be needin that answer

>Also you don't get "half-length spaghetti", there is no such thing. Breaking spaghetti will always make tiny bits.

have you literally never tried this for yourself?

>Wait, do Americans do this?

Where are you from where you don't know anybody who does this? Antarctica?

You realize this is actually how they traditionally cook pasta, right? "Al Dente" means "dented", or more loosely, "broken" in Italian. You're looking at how pasta SHOULD be made, chief

>When you break it, you can't wrap it around the fork as well, so you lose something.
What? You can still wrap it just fine.

Do Americans really do this?

But primarily because it is also more convenient to take a reasonable portion size out of the pot, the shorter length means they stick less together (because half of the length they're sticking along is no longer attached.)

Real Americans eat pic related. Don't worry yuropoors you will be able to get this in 20 years or so when you get modern spaghetti cutting technology

I cant speak for everyone, but when I dont break my long pasta in half it usually sticks out of the water on one and when ends up being slightly under cooked compared to the rest.I like evenly cooked pasta.

Basically the same reason I dont like farfalle or rotini. They never cook evenly.

>make pasta
>choose bottom tier spaghetti
why would you ever

Why are you people so angry about spaghetti?

I am a canuck and I never saw someone who did that.
Only burgers at the tv.

I come from an Italian family

One time my cousins gf wanted to help with cooking which is pretty normal in my family, hell there's usually like 8 women tripping over each other during a holiday party
anyway she snapped the spaghetti in half and was promptly banished from the kitchen

PS: post your favorite type pasta
rotini a best

I come for Italy City, Italy in Roma and my Italian family pours ketchup right on the egg noodles cold.

Americans over-complicate our cuisine it's embarrassing.

>broken
>dented
what the fuck?
al dente means "of the teeth", referring to how it feels chewy

I only wanna bring out the lil'pot user ;-;

It's actually Al D'Ente

Meaning of the Ent - the way a tree-man would eat it.

It's not like it becomes an insurmountable task but it's not the same.

Dente means tooth.

(you)

wew, you either got trolled real hard when you learned this, or just failed at trolling.

Have you tried holding the pasta in a bundle, swirling the other end a bit in the boiling water, and then dropping the whole thing in? Takes a few seconds out of the entire cooking time and has little to no impact on end result. You can also just stir it in with a spoon.

it's sort of a copypasta, i've seen it a lot of times around here

>at my brothers
>starts making spaghetti
>browns meat with onions and green peppers (no seasoning and doesn't saute them first)
>starts to boil water
>pours in a cup of oil
>tells me it takes 2 hours for the water to boil so it'll be a while
>it's finally boiling
>grabs a handful of pasta
>breaks them in half
>cooks the pasta for an hour while the meat is still cooking
>an hour later he tells me it's done
>plates noodles and meat on top
>where's the sauce
>grabs a jar of fucking prego out of the fridge and pours it on
>aren't you going to cook it?
>the hot noodles and meat cooks it for you
>what the fuck is my brother retarded?
>eating a hot and cold plate of spaghetti with rubber meat and mushy noodles
>looks over at me
>is it good?
>yeah...

Sounds revolting.

It was so fucking bland dude. A mixup of different textures and temperature.
Why the fuck is everyone afraid to season their shit?

why did it take 2h for water to boil?

Maritimer here. Can confirm that we do this on the regular

I guess his stove is shit and he didn't want to cover the pot with a lid. He didn't think about turning off the heat on the meat and using that burner because he's retarded I guess.

Don't worry user, I got the joke.

you should tell him it's trash, i like to cook and i hate it when family tries to sugar me when it's obvious i prepared something abhorrent

I tried to but he just kept going on about the merits of adding oil to pasta water and not cooking sauce. He doesn't want to get better because he thinks he's already mastered his dish.

ah i see
well, then endure it, it's one of the things brothers do for brothers
maybe do the same and experiment on him something you are trying to improve

Been thinking about making my own spaghetti and enlightening him. Problem is he's a cheap bastard with basic tastes, so who knows if it'll stick.

dont know if that would work, also sounds a lot like "look here, im a lot better than you" which is probably the truth but still not cool
eg both me and my brother like to cook, but im better in pasta/rice/appetizers while he's better at meat/grilling but sometimes we switch roles and even if we both know the other does better in its realm it's ok anyway

I'm not really close to this guy. We're only half-brothers. He's been trying to get back into my life after 23 years acting like I didn't exist by making me work on his house for him. It's kind of fucked up.

ahh nvm then, fuck that cunt

look at this sensitive butthole

I wonder how many people have been killed in pasta disputes in Italy over the centuries.

I reckon not as many as have been shot in the US arguing over BBQ or chili con carne ;)

You'd probably be wrong ;)

The only Italians I've seen ever actually argue about food are from Woodbridge, Ontario - diaspora with something to prove... to a loud, visible Italian majority. I'm sure they exist elsewhere. Can't signal, can't talk without sounding like a stereotype, can't hear an opinion without arguing.

Elsewhere, the paradox that everyone's mother or grandmother makes the best _, is just accepted.

>shooing someone away instead of teaching them
It's like your family doesn't actually bond over cooking, they just nitpick over their preferred way.

How to properly cook spaghetti:

- cold water in pan, stove to MAX
- NO FUCKING SALT
- break noodles in two, toss them in the water
- boil noodles
- strain, wash in cold water
- brown meat in the same pan
- drain fat if you want
- add spices, tomato, water and whatever
- let cook for a short while
- add a bit more water
- stir
- toss the noodles in
- stir until well blended
- turn off heat
- let it sit for 5 minutes
- SERVE

>strain, wash in cold water

>lol just wait for it to soften and push it in bro
and get unevenly soft pasta noodles? nah I'm good

This never happens

Unless it takes you over a minute to get it down into the pot it won't make a difference, but you could just use a bigger pot too.

None of you seem to know how to cook pasta and it's very saddening. Some of you might actually not like pasta, and it's probably because you're cooking it wrong.

>Get well salted water boiling violently
>Drop in your pasta (100-150g/person)
>Cook for 2min less than recommended
>Drain and toss into the frying pan with sauce of choice (that you hopefully made from scratch while the pasta was cooking) for 1-2min
>Plate out, garnish

Make sure to stir the pasta while it's boiling to stop them from sticking to each other, and make sure that there's plenty of water in the first place (no little pans).