New al/ck/ thread

You're doing god's work user.

This is more disgusting than alcoholism could ever be.

the lack of sunlight today is telling me to get day drunk

It's my birthday tomorrow. Going on 6 years no sex.

Gl anons.
I didn't even visit sisters or mum bc alcoholic. My poor wife wanted to go but I have no license from being caught drunk driving. If I see senpai I'll be driving 18hours in total.
Managed to get a job last month after 7 months getting drunk at 9am daily, so have to drive car with no license every weekday. Just gotta make it through the next 3 weeks and I can get it back again.
On Fri night my mrs asked for take-out. I was rotten drunk bc new boss let us go home at lunch. Drive to takeaway. Drunk af so I park beside him thinking they would never guess if I parked there.
Go order take away. Talk to female cop waiting for food before I go back to my car. No shits given.
I really need to stop drink driving though. 4 dents/scratches in my car. All last year. All while blind drunk. I guess at least I'm not getting as drunk this year bc zero accidents.
Alcohol has ruined me.

Him being cop*

I'm on year 6, almost 7, of not even directly talking to a girl
I wish it was as easy as high school

this is a sad general

Be careful, you barely feel drunk on it so you keep drinking

Not him but. Worst shit is when people say: you'll find a nice girl someday, and you realise you're too much of a mess to get together with someone; so it's all on you.

Hire a hooker.

I fuck a hooker or get head from one about once a month.

How do i not die? even drinking a half pint turns my insides into pain the next day

>trying to

No you aren't with your fucking off topic spam, you fucking tosser.

yeah pretty much the only reason I never approach girls or talk to anyone is because my life is in shambles already and I figure why burden some poor girl with an alcoholic boyfriend
I need to get my shit together before that

What's even worse is knowing with certainty that you won't have sex ever again.

drank for the first time in like 2 months last night, my retardo ass stayed up till like 6am drinking a fifth of bacardi while talking to some dingleberry off of omegle, woke up this morning anxious as hell and can barely leave my room, i took a big old shit in my britches also and i took my shitty pants off and it stunk so bad i had to put them back on to hold the shit smell in. hopefully by tonight the anxious will go away enough i can take the doo doo britches to the sink to wash the doo doo off or i may just throw em out the fuckin window

You are typing in shit filled pants? Omfg lmfao.

I have done a few wet farts as an alcoholic who does a good 5 runny shits a day but I've never fully shat myself and I can't imagine living in shit filled pants. Go take a shower and wash that literal shit.

what the fuck user

I progressed rapidly from drinking 2L of beer every night (for probably a decade) to half a liter of vodka every day in around 4 months and been there for a month. This is fifth night in a row that I have, with no real intention, drank only 2-3 beers a night. I'm confused. I should be hammered by now, and yet I'm sitting here with a half a beer for almost an hour. It's like I keep forgetting to drink, as ridiculous as that sounds. Nothing significant has changed in my routine. Any ideas?

Jesus man, get a grip

So, you're worried that you're drinking less?

wat

Well yeah, I'm kinda surprised that my free fall into alcoholism not only stopped, but did full on reversal. I'm basically worried that it's not a symptom of my body shitting the bed in some major way.

Go see your doctor

5th a day for 10 years.

Perfect if not better health markers and bloodwork.

New amsterdam today. Its almost noon.

H-heh, good luck that have one of those

Yeah whatever, buddy. My immune system is probably the reason I've been drinking like a fish for 11 years and as of 2 weeks ago my blood work came back A-OK.

...

Think i'll just drink one beer tonight and try to call it a day from there. I've been too dehydrated lately. Even got a white tongue atm.

NEVER trust a fart when you're an alcoholic.

Easily the worst part for me. I find myself running to the bathroom constantly because I can never tell if I'm gunna fart or shit myself

I've never related to anything more in my entire life.

I broke my 830 dollar galaxy s8 last night in a rage

That's about 2500 in broken cell phones in the last 2 years.

Anyone else get awful panic attacks during your hangover?

Someone's giving you baclofene without you realising? That or liver failure. What does your shit look like?

That's withdrawals. It can kill you and will give you brain damage.

yeah. hangovers just give me an anxious feeling in general like I did something horrible the night before even though I didn't
i've found that taking a bike ride or jog helps a lot. gets rid of that cloudy feeling

>Someone's giving you baclofene without you realising? That or liver failure. What does your shit look like?
I live alone, neet shut in. No yellowish discolorations on sclera or skin. Shit, no noticeable changes, less watery since I've taken in some actual food past few days. No blood or weird colors, but I'll pay attention the next time I take a dump. Only major change seems like my sleep has gotten a bit better and longer. No shakes, anxiety or other withdrawal symptoms, I'm still drinking, just an order of magnitude less.

Who here /sober for holidays/

10:25 am here and still sober.
Only 3 bottles of wine yesterday and I am going to try and not buy today.
Wish me luck!

Good luck, man

OH nice. Thanks user. I really think I can make it. If I don't I'll just be hungover and miserable Xmas day and no where open to buy alcohol so I know to have a good day tomorrow I can't drink today. 10:34 and not a single craving.

It looked like my annual winter depression would pass me by this year, but it arrived right on time on the first day of my 2-week vacation. Slept 15 hours yesterday, today I'm getting drunk to dull the pain.

That's your neurotransmitters messing with you. Goes to show that it only takes a bit of a chemical imbalance in your brain to produce feelings that have no actual social cause.

too close to home

If you ain't wearing a diaper, you ain't drinking shit

>your parents have accumulated lots of booze for Christmas, yes?
>just sneak down and drink it
>you can replace it tomorrow
>drink all of the the precious booze
>all of it
>drink it

>Parents
kek, I've got almost 2L of 57% liquor to enjoy from tonight to New Years Eve. So far I've drank less than 300ml of it, and in all likelihood will have less than 300ml until I'm finished for the night. Will drink again on Christmas, then one or two days I'll drink before New Years eve, and finally on New Years Eve I'll finish. Got about $45 saved as 'fun money' to enjoy on Christmas Eve and New Years Eve. Pub, restaurant, whatever. I figure I'll use it to get several cheap take-out or fast food meals, though tomorrow for breakfast of Christmas Eve I'm planning to go to an actual restaurant to sit down and enjoy basically the cheapest breakfast they have available.

Fuck being sober around relatives,
my uncle just died so now I HAVE TO WATCH THE GRANDMOTHER.
unless i do away with her, but its okay because i contacted the agency and I may get 128$?! to watch her
and thats enough money to pay off the gnomes to leave me alone FOREVER.
AND I CAN BE SHITFACEDHAMMERED 24/7 and no-one can stop me.
get on my level you gnome-sympathizers

dumbass, why break your phone when there are plenty things around you to break instead.?

...

>you can replace it tomorrow
Ha!

You had shown that picture before, you lazy bastard! Might I share in your laziness with what I drink tonight. May we lovingly and thoroughly pickle our livers.

Oh yeah, I might as well share that I've got 6 of my 10 books going for free on the 24th. It had been on the 23rd as well but I hadn't mentioned it.

amazon.com/J-N-Morgan/e/B06XZVZL2X

>Living Amongst the Dead
Hardcore and nitty-gritty zombie survival that also includes a feminist being thoroughly put in her place.

>Living Amongst the Dead: Dark Days
The first sequel of four, starts with quite a bit of action and shooting as well as bayonet usage.

>When her No means Yes
A drama erotica that had gotten a 5-star review not long ago from a woman I had ghostwritten for.

>Firearm Valhalla
Novelette action, took the picture for the cover myself in fact I'll include it in this post. 10 points to whoever can name all three rifles. Here's a hint; they were all manufactured during WWII.

>To Take what is Needed
An erotica I wrote for a woman on Fiverr, she was fine with me publishing it. Includes elements of kidnapping, BDSM, rape, but has an interesting twist at the end. Women are strange creatures.

>The Delicious Addiction of Oppression and Outrage
My first non-fiction, and my 10th book. Something of an experiment, and to the best of my knowledge it's filled with facts which is an element which the left seems to hate.

For my fellow drunkards who decide to give my stuff a go, I hope you enjoy it. Cheers!

fucking saved

>tfw you spend your thursday night with a rifle in your mouth and a bottle of whisky in your hand because you feel like you're already dead
ya know?

an entire rifle? I'm impressed!

I find this hilarious. Most hardcore conservatives I've met are divorced losers who drink too much and have retarded hobbies. Anyways, good luck on your shitty books senpai

New pic

nigga do u know where you are? in all seriousness tho we can't let this guy get the nuclear codes

Nigger or nigger lover detected

I shall continue writing whether you like it or not.
Fuckin' eh man, was just joking to begin with. I'm bloody drunk at the moment, 17oz (around 510ml) of 57.1% rum, drank, and damn don't it feel good! Cheers!

Man, I’d be shit faced. You can easily out drink me

> trying to stay semi sober around relatives edition

Opposite for me, when Christmas rolls around I feel like I have to be pretty drunk in order to be able to socialise properly with all these people I don't remember. Sucks having anxiety.

Good idea smeagul.
I been jacking sterling wine like I'm Archer

Cheers! And marry Christmas to all the al/ck/s
Any good at bar on christmas stories?

Was the uncle married to the grandmother?

I am quite shitfaced and it feels great, cheers!

Cheers to you too! Merry Christmas, Happy Christmas, whatever Christmas you like! Fuck political correctness, it's for pathetic bitches!

>tfw live in a small town in the Midwest and even grocery stores have “merry Christmas” signs

Political correctness is confined to the shithole college campus here

... I'm in fucking Canada. Seriously, be proud to have a leader like Trump. Trudeau j.r. is a God damn embarrassment and I will die happy that I voted for someone OTHER than him. I'm ashamed of my countrymen. You can get arrested for intentionally using the wrong pronoun or criticising Islam. Well all the same, fuck that, I will criticize that goat-fucking miserable religion all I fucking well want! I'm fucking writing about it! FUCK TRUDEAU, THAT KEK MOTHER FUCKER! HE'S RUINING MY FUCKING COUNTRY!

I fly back to my flat on boxing day. I can't stand being around family anymore it's like they still view me as a wee teen. Aside from genetics I have had zero in common with my family for about a decade or so.

heh, Canadians.

I sincerely hope more Canadians wake the fuck up and start thinking like you. Fuck islam

I'm ashamed that my countrymen voted for a cuck.
FUCK Islam! I was called 'Anti-Muslim' just for criticizing that terrible religion! I'm fucking ready to go to jail for the sake of freedom of expression! Fucking Trudeau, just thinking of him makes me sick. Trump CARES about Americans! Trudeau only cares about fucking goat-fucking child-molesting brown people! FUCK!

Calm the fuck down, keyboard justice warrior.

Same thing happened to me, user. Went from drinking a fifth of Aristocrat a day to one beer a night before bedtime. I don't know what happened but my bowels thank me for it. I was throwing up constantly, even after one beer with the guys, because my stomach lining was so irritated and my acid reflux was so severe. I was also taking 6-10 wet shits a day. Honestly thought there was no recovering from that tailspin, then, out of nowhere, it just stopped. I actually think it might've had something to do with the LSD I was taking at the time, like this user said.

Wray & Nephew Overproof?

>TWO
>NOTHING WRONG WITH ME

Something’s got to give

margarita makes me more fun to be around.

I got really drunk this friday that just past and was out by myself.

All I remember is getting thrown on my ass by a security guard...or someone...then I was arguing with some random cunts.Honestly surprised I didn't get my head kicked in.

Went to the club last night and made out with some fit brunette ass but lost her in the heat of the moment and shit closed down. Walked home disappointed.

When my parents got divorced my mother and I lived with my grandparents. I remember when my intoxicated father broke into my grandparent’s house and fell asleep on my grandparent’s bed. My aunt was watching me at the time and we walked past the bedroom and there was a big lump under the blankets and my aunt said to me “doesn’t it look like someone is sleeping there”. I guess she went to take a second look and freaked out. When the cops areived they didn’t arrest my father but I remember the cops standing at the bottom of the stairs calling his name. He stumbled down and my uncle picked him up. To this day I wonder what he wanted to do. Maybe talk to my mother when she got home that night?

The shit we do when we are drunk. Lol.

my dad has been drinking shitty $9 vodka out of a Tito's bottle. the worst part is the cycle, i want a couple shots but don't wanna buy a whole bottle or a 4 pack of cheap beer at the gas station so i sneak a couple, the bottle looks noticably lower so i buy a bottle to replace it, end up drinking the whole thing, not drunk enough at like 2am so i sneak some more..

>general

I cant even imagine shitting mypants, taking them off, and deciding to put them back on to 'hold the smell in'

for fucks' sake user, I hope you live alone. get your shit together. I can't even stay in piss soaked underwear, I can't imagine doo-doo britches

can't tell if you're being ironic or not and I think Trudeau is a shit but you can't blame single out islam for that kind of shit, it goes on in all the abrahamic religions. Just admit you're racist, it has nothing to do with religion.

I kind of do yet don't miss those nights. When I drink alone I'm fine, but in groups I get violent. So I choose to be a closet alcohol.

Fuck sandniggers and fuck sandnigger lovers. Go suck Muhammad’s cock

I've finally decided I'm sick of living where I live, I'm going to move to a $350 a month "trap house" in Detroit and stop paying my cell phone bill and my car/insurance.

With the money I save on rent I'm going to buy a bushmaster XM15 for protection and enjoy what life I have left before a nigger kills me for being white or running my mouth drunk.

I'm sick of paying fucking 1400 a month to live in the suburbs and hating my loud ass neighbors.

>it goes on in all the abrahamic religions

but not in equal proportions, and they're not all motivated by religion
>Just admit you're racist
Islam isn't a race

alcohol is great, sucks it's forbidden in Islam

Saline here.

Fuck niggers

How's Saline? I've only driven past it before

I live in Novi, I fucking hate it.

Over the last 10 years It's gotten progressively worst and worst (crime wise) and the population is increasing so much that driving anywhere takes a fuckin hour just in traffic.

Fuck paying 1400 a month for that shit.

I was thinking about SW Detroit/Mexicantown. Not THAT bad but bad enough that It's cheap housing.

Move to Adrian, Jackson or anywhere else in the boondocks before Detroit. It’s cheap in the sticks. You may have to drive a while to get to work but it beats living around blacks. Some of these small towns are cheap to live in like napoleon, Brooklyn, manchester, etc