How the FUCK do i make fried rice

This is the nectar of the gods produced by a Korean sushi place in my town, shits so damn good i'll kick your ass for it, fuck you. It comes with this sweet sauce that rivals canes sauce, and i douse this shit in it like it's my goddamn job. I need a high IQ individual to guide me in recreating the miracle of chicken fried rice with no veggies

It's $10 btw

-cook rice the day before, put it in the fridge
-day of, pop chicken in the fridge for half an hour then slice it VERY thinly
-scramble two or three eggs
-add oil to a hot pan and wait for it to shimmer
-add chicken and seasonings to taste (salt, pepper, little bit of MSG is fine)
-remove chicken and set aside
-add oil and wait for shimmer, add scrambled egg
-add cold rice within a few seconds
-as you stir your scrambled egg, use your spatula to break up your rice into individual pieces and let it get coated in the egg/oil
-re-add chicken as rice comes up to temperature
-add soy sauce and maybe a splash of sesame seed oil

Green onion, garlic, peas, and diced carrots are all god-tier in fried rice, your loss for not adding them.

Not that difficult, just heat up some cooking oil in a skillet and pour the grains in. Toss around until the rice is golden, (pour in maybe a cup of water, if it sputters a bit you're good) and wa la. That's it.

shrimp paste and some soy sauce

Thanks lads
yeah i knew there was something that makes it more yellow, is it just plain soy sauce or the more thick kind?

This is pretty good but I would recommend a few other things to make it taste more like restaurant style:
Using a dumpling sauce instead of soy sauce because it already has sugar, garlic, fish sauce, and other stuff added to it. also use a small amount chicken stock.

Also you can't make fried rice without fresh onion and garlic. That's where most of the flavor comes from so sautee some finely chopped onion then add your rice in. Add the garlic near the end so it doesn't overcook.

it doesn't really matter which but avoid the sweet soy sauce. i prefer really dry fried rice but some people like fluffy ones

you sound like a dipshit

What you have to first understand is how to properly cook jasmine rice - for fried rice, this means using just a bit less water, as dry rice absorbs flavor better than wet rice. Like other anons have stated, you should also let the rice cool off overnight. The next step is selecting which soy sauce to use. Usually, people just use around 1-2 tbsps of regular soy sauce, to taste, but what works best for me is something a bit different. I find that those shady chink takeout places always find a way to make the taste deeper, more interesting. My method of choice, which I find to be pretty delicious, is using a combo of 1 tbsp dark soy sauce and 2 tbsp of light soy sauce (these are different kinds of soy sauce, regular soy sauce is in between them in terms of saltiness and deep flavor). The problem with this is that its a bit more salty than normie fried rice, so I have to compensate with more oil, veggies, and eggs, but in the end, it always turns out just like my favorite takeout. Also, the thing to remember about dark soy sauce is that it adds a lot of color to the dish, so if you want it to be more golden make sure you add less of it. Oh, and the last thing to remember is to always use Asian types of oil; supplement regular cooking oil with a bit of sesame oil, otherwise, just use peanut oil for that authentic toasted taste.

How do I make a low carb low fat fried rice

Agreed, I was keeping it simple for OP.

Also agreed, I left it out because he stated no veggies (though I mentioned them at the end because WTF, you need 'em).

You don't without making big sacrifices. Google "grains with lowest net carbs" and that'll get you started, but there'll be significant differences in both texture and taste when compared with anything you'd get in a restaurant.

theres no onion in the kind i get

I'll dip your shit in soy sauce and feed it to you

I figured they use peanut oil, thats what it smells like faintly

exactly

Cook rice
Cook stuff to go in it
Toss all of it in a frying pan together with a little oil/fat
Voila!

Yellow curry

I need chicken and then we are good to go lads

make sure its sesame oil

I went to the store and couldn't fine sesame seed oil, but i used peanut oil and it turned out pretty nice! not as good as the korean's obviously, he's been doing it for decades, But it's pretty damn good. Thanks for all the help, if you have any other suggestions i'm all ears

>flyovers are so fucking hopeless their stores don't even carry sesame oil

Idk if walmart does i didn't go there, i would assume they do but i was too lazy to go across town

Don't tell me, let me guess: That ubiquitous southern hillbilly provender, Piggly Wiggly?

No i have never seen a Piggly Wiggly, also how did you know i live in the south

Because you couldn't find sesame oil. I live in this shit hole too, so I know how it is. The people in my backwater would drive their scooter to the manager and bitch if a high falutin' furriner item like sesame oil was displayed in their pristine corn oil aisle.

Idk walmart has mostly everything, we just have shitty roads here