I fucked up, Veeky Forums...

get the dried bull penis
not even memeing

I dunno if they have that at Stop n Shop mate

they might
code name:pizzle

No problem. Don't forget to come back and let us know how you fucked it up.

I'll look into it why not
Absolutely

Remember this.
Dogs love onions.

Good luck bro... remember to put the puppers in the bathroom with the door closed if it gets to be rape:30

haha
I'm a past dog owner u can't trick me

Pray for me

when she gets there, just leave a jar of peanut butter, a roll of duct tape, and a disposable camera on the coffee table.

Get a big bucket of fried chicken and some cole slaw. Make homemade mashed potatoes, gravy, and biscuits because those are easy to make.

Can definitely do that all for under $50.

There's a difference between not liking one person and not liking them all. I think that's what the poster was trying to convey.

Dogs, especially males with a female master, can be very possessive. You gotta watch for that. Offer to take him for a walk is he needs it. Show him you are a leader.

>>tl;dr how can I impress my Super Bowl date for under $50

Buy two whole chickens. Cut off the wings, separate them into flats & drums, and toast them in the oven, making sure you get nice & crispy skin. You'll have 8 wing pieces to snack on during the game.

While you're snacking, roast the leg quarters and maybe bake two potatoes or cook some rice. That's your main dish. One leg quarter per person should be plenty, but if she's American she might want two. To lighten things up, cook some green beans or buy one of those bagged salads to send with the chicken & rice. Eat your damn vegetables.

For dessert, buy a pint of ice cream.

Save those chicken breasts & tendies for your second date. Use the carcasses for stock.

She probably fucks the dog.

it's a maltese i think

at least dry humps. Chicks are fucked up.

Serious though. Walk the dog for her and give him the "Look fucker, I control where and when you shit" talk.

>girl
>watches superbowl
probably gets gangbanged on the regular

Buy some dog chocolate for her pup. They love it.

Most dogs instinctively trust people, if my dog doesn't like someone it means my dog has picked up on something I haven't yet and most people intuitively do the same consciously or not
That's what I was trying to say, after all this is what they have been bred for over centuries, we're practically symbiotic species

Have you ever watched or been invited to a super bowl party you fucking autist? Wings, nachos, beer, pizza, salsa not fucking roasted chicken and green beans

Grow up, if she is coming over that means she is forgoing another party, obviously likes him

stack 10 mcchickens and 5 large fries in a big pile and wa la, american handegg party

OP said she snagged "a date" for Sunday, not necessarily to a party. I assumed OP is trying to impress a single person for under $50, not feed a whole party of people.

If OP were asking how to impress a date to a Supef Bowl party, THAT would be autistic. There's a whole party full of people, just mooch off the shit they bring, and buy your date their preferred booze. #GoPats

make her some of Jack's football finger food
youtube.com/watch?v=A_zAUQguSeQ
giant slab of garlic bread, will b a big hit if either of you are white trash or the dog is a pit bull

Blend liver, raisins, and garlic together and bake the mush until it dries out. Then slice it up into bite sized pieces. Her dog will love it, and she will love you for doing something special for her dog.

haha but aren't raisins and garlic harmful to them??

Any day of the year for a first date and it's Superb Owl Sunday.. You blew it OP

Hopefully the broad doesn't ask you a million questions about football and won't get bored and try to change the channel

Even if she likes football though it's still an awful event to try to get to know someone

>s-so d-do y-you enjoy literature
>y-you too

it's as good a day as any

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

English is not my first excuse please, but who the intercourse?

Don't fucking over do it. Make some stuff that's slightly inventive takes on normal shit.

You can make Buffalo Chicken Dip (can of shredded chicken, cream cheese, hot sauce, top with shredded cheddar) the night before, and bake it before she shows up. Serve with some Fritos or Lays or some shit.

That's like, $12-15.

My nigga.

Make some pinwheels: deli ham, cheddar, and puff pastry, roll up, pop on their side, and bake. Boom. another $8

For an entree, buy some pre-chopped chicken (or bake and chop your own, whatever's cheaper/easier), some bell peppers and onions, provolone, and make a Chicken Cheesesteak sandwich.
Maybe another $12 or so.

Then, with the remaining $12, get some frozen limeade concentrate, corona, ice, and like, 2 airplane shots of tequila, and make Beer-garitas.

Or just drink the coronas, whatever she seems into.

Check out this hipster going on parade. It's the Super Bowl, not a poetry reading.

Just serve some normal food made normally, OP.

that probably speaks more to what kind of person you are than what kind of disposition the dog has.
the only people i've ever known that had asshole dogs were assholes, desu.
this is not law, just an observation, obviously.

>I asked her what she likes to eat and she said everything.

Whipped out my dick once at a girl who said that

OP I was literally you a few years ago.

Stressed myself to the point of not giving a shit and ended up texting her " if you want anything other than frozen pizza and cheap beer speak up now." She showed up with taquitos and we had a great time drinking high life and eating frozen junk. She kept saying how relieved she was not having to keep up appearances. We dated for almost 2 years until we got sick of each other.

It helps if you're not fat, and at least decent looking.

turns out she wasn't into gourmet portions

tfw a girl will never make a thread about you

Buy some chips, snacks, salsa, drinks etc and order pizza. Also buy some ice cream or something for dessert.

>bringing her dog

RUN

...

>give him the "Look fucker, I control where and when you shit" talk

i did this with my girlfriend's dog years ago, and she became my dog in that moment.

Nacho that bitch up. Bag of tortilla chips, pound of ground beef, taco seasoning, grated cheddar and pepperjack cheese, salsa, and you're good to go. Then grill some steaks and make twice-baked potatoes with the left-over cheese. Toss that pupper a cheap steak so he can join the party, and she'll be on your dick like white on rice.

Do what I do every year: Buffalo Chicken Cool Ranch Dorito Nachos. Bitches love buffalo chicken.

My dog attacks everyones and other dogs.
My dogs also got a six pack and pecs... People's dogs are pussies.

No they fucking don't you idiot.
LOL I've killed animals running them over you think your dogs gonna figure that out.

>reddit.
Its a meme you dip.

My Main Coon kitty would butfuck your dog while keeping eye contact with you to make sure you were watching.

You don't want to know what my bull Mastiff would be doing.

Nah nigga dogs are dumb
>I've owned five dogs and used them as guard dogs.

Neither of them would.
I bet youre a women.
>a cats gonna kill a hundred pound hunting dog.
>I ALSO eat cats and feed them to him.
Not to be a tough guy I just like feeding him other animals (neighbours pets)

>Main Coon
Liberal hipster cuck.
Cats are weak and so are the owners.
Get a scrap yard dog that lives out side during winter not a house cat.

I have a Bullmastiff and 3 Danes. My boys may move a little slow to stand, but they make pits and little 100lb dogs whimper. The fucking cat is the boss of the house though.

Lost your bet. I am a huge ass prize fighter. I do not care if you don't believe it. You cant dent my confidence no matter how hard you run up against it with your fucking helmet on

Chicken wings

Lmao this guy.

Le reddit has arrived

Give her dog some raisins mixed with dog food - she will thank you graciously

>tl;dr how can I impress my Super Bowl date for under $50

Don't forget the cabbage for doggo.

Go to Costco get their ahi tuna steak. Get some soy sauce, ginger, green onions, Sesame seeds and sesame oil. Dice the ahi into small cubes. Look up a recipe for poke sauce but it’s mostly soy sauce, ginger and small amount of sesame oil. Mix that shit up, garnish with onion and seed. Bam you made a delicious and simple Ahi Poke

fuck off weeb this is a super bowl food thread

>poke
>weeb

Football fans are retarded.

This is news?

Looking forward to having the gym to myself tomorrow. It's tomorrow, right?

Pretty sure it's Sunday.

>Football fans are retarded
Just wait until you hear from the NASCAR troglodytes!

I AM the liquor!

Just give her 15 half eaten cheeseburgers and a little drinky poo, Randers

F

Mr. Lahey.

Shit.

45 cheeseburgers

>15 for each of you

How did you fucked up getting a date?
Will you try to impress her with cooking? Impress her with light talks and effortlessly bants. Hmm sweet sweet love oh lala
Shit was so second nature tou your parents, and they're probably stupid go at it
Panty melting steak, some alcohol and that sweet sweet love yum

I'm not signing up for a Costco membership to make some girl from Tinder who I've never met before a fuckin Snapchat-tier Tastemade meme dish of the week, you absolute space cadet

This is good advice, dog gotta respect the man

I think asking to walk her dog for her would be a little strange, but what if I suggest we both go for a walk and then I take the initiative to put the dog on the leash and ask to hold the leash? It's a small white dog maybe 15 pounds so I'm not exceedingly concerned for my personal safety.

Don't forget to put the Viagra in those cheeseburgers, Bobandy

That will do.

>date on super bowl
>she's bring a dog
>she likes to eat
Wew sounds like you're in for a treat

If you live in a bigger city go to a deli and make a nice meat and cheese plate, with like olives, artichoke hearts, etc.

havent read through but make the dog a sb treat. shes going to flip.

I live in Braziltown, Massachusetts. I'm 23 and she's like 22 so artichokes and pate sounds a little too much for a Super Bowl hangout d00d
>already settled on texting her: "I'm getting pizza and beer lemme know if you want anything else"

The dog is gonna cockblock you hard m8

sliced radishes with salt
fancy olives from the olive bar at the market
good bread and a plate of salted peppered olive oil
crustless dill cream cheese and cucumber finger sandwiches
buffalo chicken dip and scoops tortilla chips
wine