How can one country be so completely devoid of literary talent?

>I don't know them therefore they are bad :P

kys

Haven't read just two out of that list and judging by the others it's completely justified to preemptively call them mediocre. Accept the reality, stop being mad and have some of those diarrhea fries you call a national dish.

>diarrhea fries you call a national dish.
fucking kek. canada btfo

Northrop Frye was a fucking magnificent human being you slack-jawed cunt. Everyone else is trash though.

>he hasn't watched little mosque on the prairie

>not including stephen leacock

Uhm no try again sweaty xx

*blocks your path*

are you kidding me?

>Justin Bieber
>Nickelback
>Celine Dion
>>Bryan Adams
>Shania Twain
>Michael Bublé

We're too busy exporting our shittiest music to the retards down south, who eat it up and make the "artists" fabulously rich.

You're wrong, is why. Go eat your fucking cheeseburgers.
*nglo food is still better than am*rican food.
>delicacy
>great culinary achievement
Nice buzzwords, bourgeoisie twat.
Only fr*gs consider diarrhea fries a national dish. In the West its more about wildberry pies, cereals, and meat dishes.

I don't know how people here can shit on Robertson Davies considering how much he resembles well loved authors here.

...

Norm MacDonald

I'm from Northeast Ohio which is literally the same thing as Canada. All we have is Sherwood and Bill Waterson

By that logic Canada can lay claim to Neil Armstrong

>We went to the moon eh n shitz

>Northrop Frye
>talentless hack
God, why is Veeky Forums so fucking bad

I'm not American, my buttblasted friend. But things like Cajun, Texmex and New England cuisine are all objectively infinitely more interesting than "things in batter", "things with gravy" and "things with mash on the side" that is literally 99% of British grub.
>pies
>cereals
>national dish
Toppest of my keks to you. Face it - Canada is cultural dump in literally every way possible. Few decent musicians and couple of buildings built by Europeans hundreds of years ago is all that your frozen shithole can offer to the world.

>academic literary criticism
>great literature
God, why are canucks so fucking pathetic

Canadian here.

The Canadian lit scene is chalk full of immigrant """"literature"""" rehashing the same narrative of oppression, struggle, freedom and the search for a new identity. This has become the accepted norm and anything challenging this farce is deemed unmarketable and blasphemous.

>Mordecai Richler
Tried Barney's Version and promptly dropped it out of boredom.
>Cohen
Forced his circumsized cock into the music industry because he couldn't bare the idea of writing poetry and not getting paid for it. Depressed for 50 years and then one day SUDDENLY CURED.
>Margaret Atwood
Unbearable prose, bearable poetry, by no means exceptional and yet she is lauded as Canada's best piece of literary talent.

Pynchon is secretly Canadian

Yes, but Canadians are secretly Americans.

And Americans are secretly British

my boy

The British are fairly unsecretly Arabs, though.

>not german

This is true.

Canadians like to go off as being culturally closer to Britain but having lived in all three countries I can tell you that the Us is much more similar. Canadians are somewhere between Australians and Kiwis.

Britain is an Arabo-Indo-Polish nation with a French motto ruled by German nobility and owned by Chinese megacorps. It is known.

>somewhere between Australians and Kiwis
Do Canadians really look like this?

needs more gulags

Just fucking nuke us already

Being boring is just part of the Canadian identity.

They’re an entire country of observers, not do-ers.

In short, Americans kick ass, while, in opposition, Canadians KISS ass.

No one takes them seriously, therefore nobody wants to read their shit.

Canadians, Australians and Kiwis are all similar in the sense that they are almost entirely irrelevant on the world stage

How long till Neal Peart gets the nobel?

Canada is basically normie nation.

Immigrants come here instead of USA because they either think they're the same, think Canada is easier to do, or notice others heading there and having better lives.

There is actually nothing interesting here. The women are all bland as fuck and hate immigrant women for stealing the show. The men are lazy as shit and can't be bothered to work half as hard as immigrant men. The kids are ignorant shits so caught up in trying to outdo each other in popularity/coolness metrics they don't notice how great they actually have it.

The wealthy upper class think they're middle class, the middle clasa think they're lower class, the lower class think they're completely impoverished, and most of the people living on the streets are veterans or too lazy/unmotivated to do anything more than mindless self indulgence.

Seriously, the only "new" entertainment Canada has actually come up with that remotely rivals USA is Jordan Peterson & Lauren Southern fucking with libtards/sjw's and getting paid for it.

>Canada came up with sports like hockey and basketball, but the US generally does both better.
>AND TO FUCKING KICK IT ALL DOWN FURTHER, THE NATIONAL SPORT IS FUCKING LACROSSE.

>owned by Chinese megacorps

Canada is, like, two years old. Just give it a minute, user.

>Canada came up with sports like hockey and basketball, but the US generally does both better.

Most of the players on "American" hockey teams are Canadian.

This kills the Canadian.

I've travelled all over the world, and everywhere I've been has something to offer, apart from Canada.
It is some shit boring wasteland, and it's populated by weed-smoking zombies.

Where do these ideas come from? What website tells you that you have to hate Alice Munro? Is this shot written in code in deuteronomy or something?

This. Canada is very boring. No one should come here. Stay out.

You all are PLEBS

>But things like Cajun, Texmex and New England cuisine are all objectively infinitely more interesting
Entirely wrong. 'mammy's minced possum gator succorolebalaya' isn't 'interesting' food. You're just too French to see that.
>more incorrect shitposting
Child, you are a burger -- get over it

Pies and cereals aren't a national dish, Canada isn't nationalized. Canada is provincialized. The unofficial dish of Alberta is probably a Saskatoon berry pie. Versus burgerfat, where the official dish of the North is the mighty cheeseburger, and the official of the South, the grand deep-fried double-triple bacon triple-decker lard sextuple patty ass-handle freedom burger

It's about half the size of England in terms of population. It was even sparser during the formative years. Most great literature comes from Western countries with a long history of existence. The same can be said for Australia. Both Canada and Australia are relatively new nations.

American culture is actually fairly old given that we are born out of the Protestant Reformation whereas Canadians are more of a Victorian creation. In fact, the same can be said about Australians, that they're made from the same Victorian mold as Canadians. So we have about a 200-year headstart over Canadians and Australians.

>2yo
>recently celebrated its 150th
Should be much further along than most countries, given its expanse of land, constant immigration, relatively stable (albeit dependent upon the US) economy, and immense natural resources.

And neither sport would be internationally renowned or cared about if it weren't for the American economy boosting their presence. The same is said for nearly every channel and program/show in Canadian media -- it's either directly outsourced to what's good in the US or at best a paltry imitation. OC does not yet exist in Canaderp.

I'd apologize, but I'm not willing to be so Canadian on an anonymoose cereal profitization board.

Agreed. Hell, crime is boring. Even the serial killers are so economically productive/successful they're bored and resort to killing and feeding whores to livestock.

Reader's Digest and the Journey Prize Anthology are the closest to legitimate greatness in the country. And shitposting on foreign weeb pr0n dumping forums. Perhaps the greatest value Canada brought the rest of the world, besides natural resources, is Ellen Page, from Halifax, NS -- and look how she turned out in the end.

Trailer Park Boys < 8 Mile; admittedly one is a series while the other is a movie. I'm sure there's more white trash series that existed in the US prior to TPB.

X Files' creator/writer and director were American. It aired simultaneously in USA & Canada for its pilot.

cuz they meke da good music

...

Wrong.

>8 Mile is good
It's wiggershit. TPB is the peak of hysterical realism in television or film. It's not just white trash, it's perfectly executed.

People, especially the poor, like wiggershit like 8 Mile because it's fantastical. A similar yet far more honest audience likes TPB because beyond some stylistic hyperbole (Lahey couldn't possibly drink as much as he does, for example), which in fact does not take from the realism, but rather defines the realism by its absolute boundaries: a ridiculous hyperalcoholic with no sexual boundraries somehow became not only the supervisor of a trailer park, but was a police officer.
It also has absolutely incredible dialogue.
It's a Confederacy of Dunces but better, and successfully made into a long-standing television and film series.

>ur wrong
>straw men
Just stop, you're already dead. Go back to eating donuts with gravy and bread toast.

I do none of that.

>The kids are ignorant shits so caught up in trying to outdo each other in popularity/coolness metrics

lol, this is the essence of you and Veeky Forums tho

good shit

Because Canadas literary tradition is literally run by middle-class white women and/or jews.

ayyy

Half of that you pulled of your ass and the other half could apply to basically any Western nation.

Sometimes I legitimately can't tell if this is a troll designed to make me mad or if this board is as retarded as it seems.

Dont talk shit about trailer park boys and Canada's worse driver.

>implying
Canadia is still a cultural wasteland compared to both most countries on Earth countries.

This, and about a thousand years of existential pain before anyone started exploring what that meant. An obsession with interpersonal interaction can't hurt.

Also, low population, low density. California has more people.

Alistair MacLeod is a Scottish Canadian short story writer and novelist from Cape Breton in Novia Scotia, who I consider one of the best short fiction authors ever.

His story, "In The Fall" is particularly good. It's about a coal mining father who is pressured by his shrew wife to sell his old retired work horse to a man who will turn him into mink feed. Written from the perspective of his son.

>the middle clasa think they're lower class, the lower class think they're completely impoverished

Really? Cause I see the opposite in Toronto and Southern Ontario. Lower classes acting as if they are Rockefellers.

I think it's the opposite as well. Then again there is no real wealth in Canada like you see in the US. Very bland nation overall

>wealth is exciting
Soyboy spotted

Wealth is opportunities, opportunities are future actions, actions shape the world. Now say something about enlightened anti-materialism and go be poor somewhere else.

>soyboy is this delusional
I have more money than you btw
Nobody thinks your cool because your man-heels cost you $8500

Opportunities =/= future actions

>being wealthy implies pointless spending
It's not even a straw man, just pure irrational asspain. Again, go be poor somewhere else.

You are talking out your ass. US buys 40% of their oil from Canada. Where do you think that goes?

Laundered and set to Cayman accounts. Not that any sane wealthy person would actually stay and live in Canadia.

To the American companies that do oil extraction in alberta. Canadians just work the rig-pig jobs that pay decent, but those CEOs and Execs are all Americans. The true wealth goes to the states

It's not even just literary talent, it's talent in general. Not a single Canadian has ever been great at anything.

Will Shatner ( captain Kirk) was the best starfleet commander. Chris hadfield was the best real life space commander.
Canada produced the best comedians (john candy, Jim Carrey, norm MacDonald, Dan aykroyd, Tom green, Seth Rogan, Tommy chong, Jon dore, etc.)
Pamela Anderson had the greatest boobs at one point.
Wayne gretzky is still the greatest hockey player ever.

It's impressive how literally every single one of these is wrong.

yeah, and they all had to leave canada and go to the US to have their career. Canada kept them from being great.

lol no

Sisko is the best captain get some taste

>Blade Runner 2049 was directed by a Quebecer and starred a guy from Ontario

Yeah but that movie sucked

...

>leacock
This. Fucking pseuds in this thread.

Ever been to Mariposa? Seems comfy

What about Cuphead?

add Norm Macdonald to that list buddy

>there is only great literature and talentless hacks

I like ross king books

>And neither sport would be internationally renowned or cared about if it weren't for the American economy boosting their presence

Nobody in Canada gives a shit whether Americans (or anyone else) watch hockey or not.

Again kiddo I have way more money than you

Prove it, give a substantial amount to whoever posts their paypal first.

Why would I do that?