Write what's on your mind

>be 19
>have had recurring periods since I was 15 where I have zero sex drive whatsoever
I've been searching around the Internet and it doesn't at all seem like a common problem for males my age so it must be something serious. I exercise regularly and don't eat much junk food, but I am a constantly stressed schizoid NEET which I don't know is a symptom or cause of what could be some neurological issue. So yes, the answer probably is I'm a constantly stressed recluse, but in that case I'd just expect this issue to be more documented online. I don't know. "See someone about it"- I probably should.

Soon that bitch at the pharmacy is going to have to go. The way she says, “Next! Come up! Come up!” makes me wanna get up, look right at her, and fucking choke the bitch til her windpipe snaps in half. Perhaps it’s better if I just do it and get it over with. Probably have to blame it on the pills again when they throw my ass in prison. Fucking shit. Why am I at the god damn pharmacy all the fucking time? Maybe if my doctor didn’t give me 40 antidepressants I wouldn’t have to be here so often and contemplate strangling the shit at out of that cunt. I do my fucking part. I go out. I try to be social. None of it fucking works. Why should I have to control my inner impulses? I’ve done all I’ve could. Why don’t they do their fucking job? Give me something that works. Don’t just give me bullshit platitudes for me to complete and pump me full of god damn magic pills when your “advice” doesn’t work. Fuck it, I’ll probably just do my nightly stalks til she starts running then call it a night.

>be 19
>be worried about sex
lmao it's literally nothing kid you're stressed/depressed wowie wow how do you not know that your sex drive shuts down under stress that's high school psych stuff
>expect it to be more well documented
you're panicking over nothing dude, probably you're just searching weird shit like "why can't I jack it eight times a day anymore" instead of "effect of stress on sexual drive"
that also happens when you're hungry, tired, strained or uncomfortable. your body shuts off unnecessary processes like sexual appetite before anything else
try not being depressed, that'll put the scooter in your shooter

what's so special about relationships ??

Getting better all the time
I'm getting better all the time

Way to miss the point. And you type like you're my age or less

I unionically wanna kill somebody, anybody.
Preferably someone who is isolated and isn't close to many people, but he should still have hopes and aspirations that I may quash.
I don't think I'll actually do it though. It'll just remain as a fantasy I keep to entertain myself.

>giving a shit about typing this late at night
found your problem guy, you got a stick up your ass. FYI modern culture is ridiculously oversexed, so if anything you're probably closer to a healthy balance than most of us. Not that I expect you to appreciate it.

>t. just read C&P

Being medicated has removed a lot of the anxiety I have about life and how insignificant I am as a single human being. Ive taken a new approach on life in that we can create our own purpose other than there being a divine or intrinsic purpose we as humans must follow. It feels liberating to not feel like I'm stuck on a certain path.

I keep jumping through hoops thinking I'm just some basketball in other people's games but, if I'm jumping to get in the hoop, than I'm either just some stupid human doing what he thinks other people need him to do to keep the game going, or I'm not in any basketball game, I'm just exiting some random circular objects that I've designated as hoops, and these people are all strangers - strangers who I've never know, nor care to know other than to ask what is the difference between a goal and a purpose? If you have a goal, it doesn't seem to me that you need a purpose, but if you have a purpose, then, well, you'll definitely need a goal. So if there is this difference between the two, is it an important difference? Do you jump through hoops because that's the goal, and you don't care that the game has only the purpose to score lots of goals? Do you get passed around because your purpose is to score? Why does a person even say they'll jump through hoops for anything let alone anyone anymore? It's very dead; very, very dead. The act I do costs me energy, and then I am lifted. I arc towards the circular object. I fulfil my duty. I am beyond the threshold. I am going beyond myself to give you this - and I know for a fact you don't like basketball, nor men who fit through this hoop so easily. I would like to say that I am simply aware of the momentum, and I am privileged to have such an audience for my graceful exit. That isn't to say eternally, spectators. I'm simply stating that the end of the deeds which I do to go beyond the normal is glorious. My bounce is sublime, and my goals my own, for my own purpose - though I have purposely fouled this, haven't I? Except, you cannot know the game! Unless it is you who I jump through hoops for, and I believe it cannot be you. I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to know your extra curricular activities. Not you. No, not you.

Depression and anxiety cause huge drops in libido, particularly when you are going through a particularly bad spout. I went through the same at about your age. It improved drastically when I sought professional help for mental health. There are ways of coping with anxiety that greatly reduce it so my advice is to look into that before assuming you're dysfunctional.

Just found out my gf was in a sorority freshman year and did a buttchug at a frat party... dont know if im gonna make it lads, shes already met my parents too, god dammit I hate this gay earth

Just found out my gf was in a sorority freshman year and did a buttchug at a frat party... dont know if im gonna make it lads

What kind of medication are you on user? I've been going through the same thing and while I have made progress on my own, I am still plagued with anxiety to the point of constant physical symptoms. I don't know how I feel about taking medication to help.. But it seems like the only option at this point.

What kind of treatment did you get? Anyways I probably am overreacting but to clarify the cyclical nature of this issue seems independent of my mood mostly and that's why I made the post

Shame. Oxford really has lost whatever illusion of prestige it ever had, eh?

The whole problem with furries is that they break the cardinal rule of fetishes: never make your fetish a lifestyle. People with all sorts of fetishes break this rule, but furries do it the most.

I'm on mirtazapine which is generally considered pretty strong (but I was about to end it) which has drastically removed all that anxious "noise" and kept my head clear. Keep in mind you will gain weight (it's given to anorexics) and it's quite difficult to come off. Honestly user there are hundreds of anti anxiety and depression meds and it's all about finding the one that keeps you chemistry in check. Talk to your doctor and they might be able to treat you with something a lot lighter than what I've had.

I honestly wish the best for you user and hope you find something that works for you.

CBT, other therapy and some medication. It's really hard at that age to sort out your thoughts and feel in control but CBT really helps with allowing you to control how you think, not letting your anxiety control it.

Soon that bitch at the pharmacy is going to have to go. The way she says, “Next! Come up! Come up!” makes me wanna get up, look right at her, and fucking choke the bitch til her windpipe snaps in half. Perhaps it’s better if I just do it and get it over with. Probably have to blame it on the pills again when they throw my ass in prison. Fucking shit. Why am I at the god damn pharmacy all the fucking time? Maybe if my doctor didn’t give me 40 antidepressants I wouldn’t have to be here so often and contemplate strangling the shit at out of that cunt. I do my fucking part. I go out. I try to be social. None of it fucking works. Why should I have to control my inner impulses? I’ve done all I’ve could. Why don’t they do their fucking job? Give me something that works. Don’t just give me bullshit platitudes for me to complete and pump me full of god damn magic pills when your “advice” doesn’t work. Fuck it, I’ll probably just do my late night walks til she starts running then call it a night.

im sorry, theres no other way to say this user start with the greeks

>I keep jumping through hoops
examples, what are these things you are doing for people? Are you an intern? A lady of the night? A normal job? Friends with not enough benefits? Teacher giving you a lot of homework?

...

its not a fetish, it is a way of life bro... why should we care about rules? We are all animals at heart, me and my people just choose to not run from that truth

Fuck off cunt. I'm a better writer than you'll ever fucking be. You're pathetic. Go suck off the tit of the government.

for some reason im having nocturnal emissions almost every time i sleep on my stomach or my side. but if im sleeping on my back it never happens. any bio majors in tyhe house know wtf this is?

accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.057.nymo.html

can you give me the run down?

I have legit autism. Clinically diagnosed and everything. I wish I could figure out how to get autism bux from the government, because I could sure use the money.

on what

Is laughing a sign that they trust you to not quickly put something in their mouth?

When you broke all the rules that can be broken and you have licked your wounds and it is neither your remorse nor your passion that reigns, who are you left with then? Are you proud of what you have become, darling?

Depends who you started with and how many you kill in mass murders, serial killings. If you broke all the rules, you must've murdered, mass murdered, genocided, manslaughtered, etc a certain number of people, but you could probably count the minimum number of deaths needed and start with any number of people, and that will tell how many you're left with.

Soon that bitch at the pharmacy is going to have to go. The way she says, “Next! Come on! Come on!” makes me wanna get up, look her dead in the eye and fucking choke the bitch til her windpipe snaps in half. The cool rush as I hear her gasp for the last bits of air. The fluttering sensation I feel go down my spine as I see her eyes roll in the back of her head, whilst froffying white foam bubbles up in the corner of her mouth...What? What the fuck are you looking at. Oh I guess this is my fault? It always is, right? I'm sick right? Well I guess you better treat me. Perhaps it’s better if I just do it and get it over with. Probably have to blame it on the pills again when they throw my ass in prison. Fucking shit. Why am I at the god damn pharmacy all the fucking time? Maybe if my doctor didn’t give me 40 antidepressants I wouldn’t have to be here so often and contemplate strangling the shit at out of that cunt. I do my fucking part. I go out. I try to be social. None of it fucking works. Why should I have to control my inner impulses? I’ve done all I’ve could. Why don’t they do their fucking job? Give me something that works. Don’t just give me bullshit platitudes for me to complete and pump me full of god damn magic pills when your “advice” doesn’t work. Fuck it, I’ll probably just do my evening walks til she starts running then call it a night.

Shut the fuck up. I'm so tired of being disrespected on this goddamn website. All I wanted to do was post my opinion. MY OPINION. But no, you little bastards think it's "hilarious" to mock those with good opinions. My opinion. while not absolute, is definitely worth the respect to formulate an ACTUAL FUCKING RESPONSE AND NOT JUST A SHORT MEME OF A REPLY. I've been on this site for 6 months: 6 MONTHS and I have never felt this wronged. It boils me up that I could spend so much time thinking and putting effort into things while you shits sit around (probably jerking off to traps or whatever gay shit you like) and make fun of the intellectuals of this world. I've bored you? Good for fucking you. Literally no one cares that your little brain is to underdeveloped and rotted to comprehend my idea...MY GREAT GREAT IDEA. I could sit here all day whining, but I won't. I'm NOT a whiner. I'm a realist and an intellectual. I know when to call it quits and to leave the babybrains to themselves. I'm done with this goddamn site and you goddamn immature children. I have lived my life up until this point having to deal with memesters and idiots like you. I know how you work. I know that you all think you're "epik trolls" but you're not. You think you baited me? NAH. I've never taken any bait. This is my 100% real opinion divorced from anger. I'm calm, I'm serene. I LAUGH when people imply I'm intellectually low enough to take bait. I always choose to reply just to spite you. I won. I've always won. Losing is not in my skillset. So you're probably gonna reply "lol epik trolled" or "u mad bro" but once you've done that you've shown me I've won. I've tricked the trickster and conquered memery. I live everyday growing stronger to fight you plebs and low level trolls who are probably 11 (baby, you gotta be 18 to use Veeky Forums). But whatever, I digress. It's just fucking annoying that I'm never taken serious on this site, goddamn.

Oh my dear, where to start with a pathetic fuck, like you

This is not your ecochamber that tumblr is, this is where you are confronted with the purest that mankind is without its restraints, you are confronted with reality, these images show fucking reality, if you are like me, you are desesitized to this kind of shit due to prior happenings, but your comment just shows that you are some priviledged weak cunt who never had something bad to experience and lives on in his isolated dream world where never something bad happens

most people here don't even fucking value their life due to how others treat them, tell me a reason how you shouldn't shrug off death, if life does not treat you well cunt

shut up you fucking faggot, I'm 21 and have a job, have been posting on this chan for 6 moth, and have sex regularly, don't fucking call me edgy. I'm going to take thirty fucking Kershaw kerambit knifes and furiously stab you until your screams of pain are reduced to gurgles and then in your death throws find the biggest knife wound and fuck it until I orgasm, using the blood as lube, and I hope all of you other liberal retards get cancer and in your final days bleed out in a car crash so I can jack off to the images just like I did where the Starship Troopers where Diz gets ripped apart and chokes to death on her blood, you'd better fucking run before my penis is covered in your blood, and be a lesson to all of these faggots who think the fallacy of calling me edgy is a legitimate tactic for arguments

Hahaha holy shit what a faggot. Your post was pasta worthy though I'll give you that.

As the faithless cat approached the tribunal, he realized how futile his intentions to convince the council were, he shed a single tear.

"Atticus Xander O'hara, you may now speak to the great jury" - a deep voice said.
Our scared cat friend came into the presence of the elders, they remained serious as he stood in front of them and said "I'm here your honor", you could cut the tension with a knife on that hall, then one of the elders spoke.

It has come to the attention of this council that you have commited a minor crime against your fellow feline, although we; and I personally recognize that we won't be dealing with a major crime, this doesn't change the solid fact that you must be punished, wether you understand it or not.

Our Cat tried to be humble but he was nervous as you can get, his paws were sweating and his legs were shaking...

"Ehem, I've got something to add before we continue" - said with a calm but firm voice one of the other elders of the council.

Mister Atticus, it is important to clarify that wether you wanted it or not, you transgressed the law, although you must also keep in mind that this council does not, by any mean, over punish you, don't be afraid young feline, we might seem imposing but we're just want the greater good for all our people.

The presents then laughted under their breath and quickly regained the composture.

The elders watched them and almost gave them a warning, but the silence then again quickly reigned over the place.

The first elder said immeadiately a thing:
Without no more delay, we will proceed to name the crime that you commited and then we will decide what kind of punishment you will be having.

"What kind of punishment are these elders going to give me?"

"I just stole some candies from the candy store of the old Jenkins, I didn't know he was the cousin of one of these guys"

"What's the purpose of this senseless trial?"

"Are they nuts?"

You're so young dude. Reel it back and be humble with your opinions. You will always have something to learn.

No need to be upset my friend

>Kershaw
My man.

once slept with a married woman I met on CL. she posted complaining that her husband prematurely ejaculated and she had never had "real" sex since he was her only partner. she couldn't handle it and just wanted to try sex out once.

so we talked for a while, flirting and shit, talking about sexual desires and kinks etc. it was clearly all new and exciting to her. she even sent me a few nudes. she was in her early 20s, thin / athletic runners build, medium boobs, hot librarian looking brunette. way hotter than any girl I had been with prior to that, honestly. way out of my league under normal circumstances. nonetheless, we eventually decided to meet up at the local mall.

believe it or not, we ended up fucking in the back seat of my car right there in the underground parkade. she was eager and very horny. must have already made up her mind about it before meeting me. I felt like I was just an accessory throughout the whole thing

>tfw her pussy was so tight that I came prematurely too

didn't talk to her again after that. that poor husband had no chance, her pussy was like a fucking lubricated vice grip on my cock

I looked her up on social media recently and it appears she has had a divorce and gone full millennial woman club slut, problem glasses and all

congrats bruh this is the most brutal spergout ive ever seen on Veeky Forums

I nominate this for new pasta

I wander through life aimlessly, telling my family that I have no desires or ambitions, nothing to live for, while really I have desires that are killing me inside because I am unable to achieve them due to my incompetence in life and their inapropriateness in modern society.

Another day another chapter. Drinking less, writing more. I am ok.

cats cant sweat

They sweat through their paw pores.

Love! Love! Love! I have not seen your face since I was a child.

I think i have throat cancer

How come women support Government sanctioning public discourse when the same Government used the same power to treat their grandmothers like livestock?

Exorcise them from your life and body while you still can. They will destroy you in a way you are incapable of comprehending.

I think my favorite part of this is that you had to specify the knife manufacturer and model you're going to use. This is amazing.

Benchmade >>>> Kershaw

I'm still thinking about that girl I fucked things up with this past summer when I was living and working in another part of the country, how she went after me for a while but then wanted nothing to do with me once she learned I was leaving. I want to talk to her but she's stopped opening my messages. I feel pretty pathetic to be honest.

Nah I'm ok dude. I understand what they're doing and when I'm going to stop.

I'm tired of being alive desu. A friend said I should join a volunteer organization doing something that will probably kill me, but when asked to name one I'm qualified for he couldn't. I will probably just keep waiting for SSI and then collect it for the rest of my life, or until Trump disbands it, and then kill myself.

How can you make a being who is incapable of experiencing suffering understand suffering?

The wonder and zest for life I had while growing up has always been itself a refutation to everything pessimistic that I have ever encountered. No matter what I endure, because that perspective during childhood even existed, I can't help but be aware of the impermanence of everything and the necessity to select what is important to us, and to select the perspective that life is horrid suffering is to me either a choice based on cowardice, a choice based on stupidity, or not a choice at all but the result of an experientially stunted person.

Requesting an info dump.

well, fuck me, It's true
sigh

Top kek. Not even the people who are prescribing this shit understand what they're doing.

Why should someone who is imperfect be forgiven for his imperfections?

Sometimes it can be quite difficult to keep up the Veeky Forums-life when you work a tiring 9 hour day job.
I planned to go to the library this afternoon to write and start reading On the Road in the evening, but when I got home from work I only managed to have some lunch and then fell asleep until now (it's 8 PM).
Now I'm making dinner. I might still start reading On the Road anyway.

Complete freedom is also oppressive in its own way.

Freedom is only oppressive if you lack motivation and the ability to direct yourself.

My ex. I'm worried about her. She doesn't value herself at all, isolates everyone. I wish I could've helped and I tried everything but she always rejected it. She'd rather keep to herself in fear of hurting others. She lives a life of full of loneliness and thinks she's doing the right thing, that she's a martyr who sacrifices her happiness for the wellbeing of those around her.

I tried and tried to help then I tried and tried to forget

It feels like losing someone to cancer, you know the inevitable is coming but you care and you want to fight but there's no life left in that shell of a person and you're just dragging her along until she just lets your hand go and accepts her faith. You're in denial and you'd still run through fire and bash heads and kill and die and take every chance to suffer in her place m, but she doesn't want you to.

I fucking hate depression

*fate

Phoneposting

I know a person sort of like that user. I know she's lonely and I'm unable to be there for her.

Yeah I agree. It's a matter of being self disciplined.

My seasonal allergies have set in.

It's time for the steroid injection in the ass and I look forward to it less every time I think of it.

I was 18 and met a 35 year old guy who was fairly attractive and we went to dinner, went to hotel and made out and had sex, he wanted me to fart on his face and smother him, was pretty weird but I went along with it. looking back I probably shouldn't have done it. i'm 21 now, still gay as hell.

Does anyone else have recurring dreams based on the AvP fps games? Quick snippets of impending death, impossible angles, strange colors, encroaching darkness, the urge to hide, vertigo, frenzied chasing, baroque corridors, simultaneous power and fragility, suicidal aggression, cosmic loneliness.

Nigger
Nigger nigger
Fuck niggers
Fuck you
Motherfucking nigger
All you niggers
All you
God
Damn
Niggers
Fuck
All you pedo fucks
Fucking pedo nigger dildo fucking shit fucks
Fuck you
Fuck you all
All you shit fuck slimebag motherfuckers
All you goddamn motherfucking nigger cunt dicks
Fucking unfuck your shit
Cuz you fucked up
Fucking nigger shit fuck mothers
Every last one of you assblasting pedo slimbag shitty dicks

I'm defrosting my old-ass mini-fridge. Kind of a pain in the ass, but my landlord got it for me for free so I'm not complaining. Shouldn't take much longer, maybe a half-hour, got a bowl of piping hot water in the freezer section.

Excellent post, my almonds are off the charts.

Hey guys, I did it, it's finished, and I neither got electrocuted nor ass-raped by Muslim immigrants/"refugees". All in all, this day is going pretty good!

That isn't a very nice post...

>still gay as hell
you had me until there

what's on your mind

Writing. It's my jam, but where's the toast? Hold still.

Why do they hide the year of release, so ardently, on DVDs?

There's one of you in every thread, cleverclogs. Why bother?

wow, i thought my city was supposed to be the city of models

NO. EVERY GUY AND EVERYONE HERE IS SOOOOOOOO HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;0; omg.......

also i'm so sad. i'm afraid to cehck my purse because i think i lost that guy's card lmaooo ;(

checked it. it's gone. damn...... i can't tell who's cuter - the first guy i met, the boy who .... , or the guy i just met outside my place and lskdjflsdkjfa;lskdjf;alksdjf;laksdjf;alksdjf;alskdjf;alsdkjf;alskdjf;lskdjf;laksjdf;lksadjf;alksdjf;lksdjf i can't even do anything bc i'm waiting for him to burst down my door LMAO ;-; AAAA!!!!1111

goooooooooooooooooood. lesson learned - always be prepared...

next time i s2g ....

boys always have to approach when i'm not 180% why? whyyyyyyyyyyyy ;-;

everyone here is so handsome and pure.

i should get to my actual inboxes, and not daydream about my neighbours...

This makes me sick.

i won't forget you hotties omggggggggggggg ... i wish my mind was actually present so i could've 1) understood and retained everything he said and 2) not rushed in like a dumbass ;-;.. WHY. WSDLKJFALSDKJF;ASLKDJF AH

dear santa please you-know-what thanks ^_^

ya know, I really feel like a lady wrote this. So good job if you're fakin, lol

Having suicidal thoughts because the exact plan I devised to escape my previous bout of suicidal thoughts. In a similar situation, so more or less stuck.

On the same night I was able, for the first time in many years, to be honest with my parents and we all reconciled--on that same night I was ghosted, blocked and forgotten by the one girl I'd thought I had a chance with in months, maybe a year.

On the one hand, I felt like a weight had been lifted. On the other hand, it was hard for me to forget what felt like a loss. She was beautiful, and kind. Well, I thought she was kind, anyway. First person in a long time who talked to me equal or even more than I talked to them. It was nice while it lasted. I guess I don't even feel that sad anymore.

It's evil, I think, to assume that someone deserves or is obligated to enjoy romantic love. It's really entitled. I don't say that in a feministic way, I think it's true for everyone, not just men. Love is a grace that we can't earn or deserve. It's a bonus, an addition to life, not one of life's substantive building blocks.

I mean, just think about it in probabilistic terms. First of all, the male/female ratio isn't exactly 50/50. And even if it was, how many of those partnerships are gonna work out? Luckily, I think that most people are so normal and similar that they'd fit together with anyone or anyone, with millions of milling multitudes and more. But for people like me--it's not my own specialness, but my differentness from other people, this lasting sense of alienation and the difficulty with which I strike even the dimmest fire with another person, let alone a woman.

All this is just a rationalization patching over an inexplicable sense of peace that I feel for a moment, just as whatever thoughts I had last night were really only emotions that were so strong that I mistook them for the truth.

Oh, but I'd like to go out with someone, just once. It doesn't help that I've lost my libido almost entirely. Some nights I wake up with my heart pounding, dangerously intense and fast, so much that I think it's almost an unhealthy rate, as much as it was when I took adderral, caffiene, and cigarettes together after a sleepness night and it worried me so much that I "bore down" while squatting and took deep breaths for 30 minutes until I felt I could drive it down out of the yellow zone. I wake up with that feeling, and I panic, feeling under my chin, between the tendons of my wrist, trying to count or tell if it's some serious damage or not--and those are the only times I really feel my libido coming back. Everywhere else, anywhere else, it's completely absent.

I look at people and I don't feel a thing. In a way, it's a kind of freedom, but I'm beginning to feel lonely; I don't like being that far from humankind. Also, companionship, camaraderie, all that stuff you can get with a girl is absent.

It doesn't help that I'm taking a class about human happiness. It's really funny. I never feel sadder than when I'm in Human Happiness. This time, someone gave a presentation showing that things that give us pleasure are closely tied to life satisfaction and ...

Similar feels. In my case, I was overbearing and insecure in response which only seemed to make it worse. Now she's in despair every other night and really not responding to my attempts to help her (which are genuine but hopeless, since I have similar problems)

... greater average pleasure. It's not true of TV or other things that are obviously a time sink. Do you know which event was the most pleasurable and had the biggest correlation to a satisfying life and the highest mean happiness? Making love. What a horrible confirmation for what I try to think are my darkest, most misanthropic, most ill-informed delusions. The science really bears it out. And that's what I want, if only for the intimacy and affection. The closeness and love. I have prayed to my lord for a while for that, for a long while, it seems. In my actions and thoughts I feel I have been praying for it for a long time. Not only is there nothingness, a radical nothingness, no hand-holding, no secrets shared, no flirting, no glances, no smiles--even the smallest signs are excluded, as if I was wearing the mark of cain--but if I ever fall into oases in this big desert (strictly online only), if anyone ever seems to see, seems to want to get close, to understand, to show some kindness and closeness in kind... If that ever happens, they get as close as possible, then disappear.

That is the real complaint; this is not just a desert, but I almost feel like I am being tormented by demons. That in itself is a flattering fiction, preferable to the obvious reality--I have no self-awareness, I'm clearly unattractive, both within and within, I'm missing the most obvious, foundational things that make a person, a man appealing...

Here I've already gotten lost down my own path.