Crazy Coated In Black

wattpad.com/511150938-crazy-coated-in-black-chapter-1-did-you-see-her

I was wondering if anyone wants to take the time to read the story Im making it would really mean lot to see what people think if they want me to keep going or not so anyways here click the link above and tell me what you think

I will be updating it soon

You should post this in the critique thread, OP.

Where? and is that a good thing or a bad thing? (new to this)

...

Again... good thing or bad thing?

What do you mean? If it's good to post there? I don't know if you'll get any constructive criticism (probably not) but it's the only place on the board to ask for advice etc. A new critique general thread is posted after the previous one dies, so that the board doesn't get flooded with different threads, so keep an eye out for that (view catalog instead of paged)

Well thanks for helping I just want someone's opinion if I should keep writing it it's going to get a bit crazy and weird

I mean if you like writing it you should go for it. You can improve it later if people don't care, or try something else. The more you write and read, the better you will be. Or simply write until you're bored with it.

and good luck

what language did you originally write this in and what translation software did you use, because it seems to have lost something in-between.

I don't want to reveal too much of the story I wrote this in English yes maybe my writing isn't good but is that on purpose?

To this posts knowledge, I updated the story not much to give a peak of whats going on next and an important part of the story

>is that on purpose
doubtful.
but if it is, the market on writing like you don't know the fundamental rules of english and being praised as a genius for it is already corned by cormac mccarthy.

It's part of the story
The story takes place in an alternate universe as you are reading Joe 2 in the next chapter is Joe 1, what happened to Joe 2 as he wrote this in his mental state of going crazy of what he knows later on, and deals with time and space, comprehending whats going on and how to tell it without his medication.

i stand corrected. and credit for being good at writing like a near illiterate.

The Bio Problem / Tense
There is more than 1 Joe in this story as one of the Joes are communicating with the main Joe, Joe 1. Saying >When your life was only but simple and plain and your mom's death hurts, and then uncover something life-changing, can I live to tell what really happened?
That's one of the Joes talking to Joe 1 Because Joe 1 is the only one that can stop the loop for now

how old are you?

I don't think that matters but im, not 17 or under

it sounds like you're a middle-schooler or have a developmental disorder
sorry if I'm being rude or hurting your feelings in any way

that doesn't mean you can't write a story, but you will have to work hard on it to make it readable

sorry again

That's my point that's part of the story read that

your posts on here sound the same

a window into the world of a 95 IQ

i liked the story a lot

You do?

i like how the figure on the cover reflects the author after reading his work

top bait lmao

>corned
top sides

Hmm. Let;s pretend that it is as you say: this iteration of Joe is off his meds, and that's why his sentences run terribly, he displays little grasp of grammar, punctuation, focus, etc. You're going to struggle to keep the reader interested unless you open with something stronger and better written, say a missive from Joe 27, who is an eloquent genius. If you open with this Joe's yammering, the reader is going to mistake his shortcomings for yours, and simply stop reading.

So post us your high prose style. Changes in register are refreshing (I'll post you some of mine soon).

Good luck user

Hmm its like you knew there was a smart Joe, yes I know it's a bit off of grammar and all that stuff but this isn't done yet I just wanted input if this was a good story to keep going and I will edit along the way just please give me some slack stories aren't perfect when you never told one before I promise it's going to be good and I know it is bad right now I promise it will be eye-catching someday I just need to write this down before I lose the main point of the whole book, to be a mystory something to solve something to find out but im glad your giving me input thats amazing to hear and yes maybe the cover is a bit weird but I'll make updates