I'm a drunk user. I halfway know my stuff...

>I'm a drunk user. I halfway know my stuff. Ask me anything related to the canon or anything in life and I'll give you an honest-to-god opinion and answer. At the end tell me if I'm worthy.

Is bretty good

why Harold Bloom 's fiction book was so shit?

What's the greatest Shakespeare character and why?

Do you wear long johns aka thermal pants aka long underwear in the cold months?

If you don't you're a dumbass. Long underwear is trad af and keeps you damn toasty. Never will you complain about the cold if you're wearing your johns. Whenever I hear somebody whine about the temperature I inwardly label them a total retard for submitting to social pressure and keeping only their genitals warm. Somebody who wears johns NEVER complains about the weather because he's warm all the time--he has no need to

Why don't you step up your game and bring an honest-to-god good question to the table? I'm tired of these anons shitposting, man. I was a newfag two and a half years ago, but now I've been here long enough to realize that most people here are talking out of their asses, but at least they're talking out of their asses and are unlike you, who literally looked at this post and thought it was a good idea to say, "Is bretty good." Then there's the guys (and gals, God forbid) who actually have solid input and literal analysis.

I know nothing about Harold Bloom's fiction but I guess it's because he has read too much. He was right when he said one can read too much. So was Montaigne, so was Schopenhauer, so was Plato, and so was Nietzsche-literally four of the biggest bad boys of literature and philosophy (and Martial said it.) You have to read a lot, sure, but you also have to live and think for yourself. Though I know nothing about his fiction, I can tell you Harold Bloom is not only an inspiration but a great critic on his own. I don't know if I saw this somewhere (I'm pretty sure I didn't), but he's a martyr. The dude has read everything and he's here to tell us his opinion on it. I've read all the memes concerning him, and more importantly, I've read "The Invention of the Human" and the beginning of his western canon book. If he's right about anything, he's right about the fact that Shakespeare's the greatest. A couple observations of his off the top of the mind that are timeless: 1) We need irony 2) We need to avoid cant 3) Henry IV is good because Hal learns how to overcome his father figure without completely dismissing him as a human being 4) Hamlet is godlike and Shakespeare's philosophy transcends Plato's 5) As You Like it is good because of Rosalind and she's the best Shakespeare girl... And that leads me to my next question...

She's not the best shakespeare character but Rosalind is godlike to any reading male who has been in a relationship. Seriously, read Act IV Scene I of As You Like It and tell me that won't get you through any romantic relationship ever. Woman is always testing man. It's the Marilyn Monroe "If you can't handle me at my best" but guess what??? Rosalind isn't a Marilyn Monroe and she's actually a sweet soul. If at any point you are thinking about cuckoldry, scolding, or anything that might be bugging you in a relationship, solace can be found in Rosalind. Also: Cleopatra does this but to a lesser and subtler extent, and so does Cressida.

If i have to pick the best character though it has to be Hamlet for obvious reasons I'll expand upon if asked about. I'm sure Falstaff is great but I'm still trying to figure out why, and personally I'm trying to figure out who MY falstaff is because I have so many father figures in my life. Also, even Petruccio in a play early as Taming of the Shrew is a godlike character.

i love you user and this is the best post i've seen in five minutes.

Yeah desu I think Cleopatra may qualify as the bad Rosalind/Marilyn Monroe bitchy type. I figured Hamlet would likely be your choice - the man is the definitive negative/inward and existentialist in fiction, and I find myself and others who are sad types modeling him all of the time.
What would you say is your favorite play? I'm asking these kinds of questions of course because you posted Shakes, and I figure you probably have stuff to say about him.

You're spot-on, and thanks for noticing the Shakespeare. Hell yes Cleopatra is the bad form of Rosalind, slightly, and hell yes Hamlet has that negativity about him--to the layman he and his play can literally be applied to any heavy downfall or existential crisis you may be having, and then some.

I struggle to even pick a top 10 so I'll give you a few of my favorites and tell you why I love them and maybe that'll tell you about what type of person I am.

>Taming of the Shrew
This dude wrote this in his early twenties and it captures love perfectly. How? Well it goes to show you that there's no right answer, no matter how hard you search, but Petruccio and Kate damn-do have it close and good. Sure, Petruccio tames Kate in a sense, but doesn't Lucentio play a game with Bianca? Is all love a game? Who's being more straightforward? Petruccio by a long shot, and a clear and honest shot too if it weren't for the arguable torture. Any decent man would pick Kate over Bianca and say Bianca is the real shrew, but then you have Bianca saying wise words like this:

"Why, gentlemen, you do me double wrong
To strive for that which resteth in my choice."

Cf. that with the Chaucer tale about Apollo worrying about his wife cheating on him, and Chaucer (or whoever the narrator is) advising that you can't change a woman, no matter what she's like.

>Winter's Tale
Here is where I finally realized that no matter how many times Shakespeare mentions "cuckoldry," an idea that is really present through so much of the western canon: no one in Shakespeare ever cheats!!! I was told that someone cheats in Troilus, but I don't remember that and I've only read it 1.5 times.

>Merchant of Venice
I've read this one either three or four times and i've come to see Shakespeare's relativism and infinite quotability through MoV. "In sooth I know not why I am so sad. It wearies me, you say it wearies you." Right away: is Antonio saying that Solanio and the other dude don't really care? Also: Shylock is sympathetic, sure, but I tend to the Harold Bloom school of thought and say he's more comically villanous--after all, why is he so damned hellbent on vengeance, dude? Where's the forgiveness???

>King Lear
I recently went through this and I'm not going to pretend that I can comprehend at least 20% of the genius, but I will say that even in the first few acts one can learn that: Brevity is good. Frankness is good. Gratitude is good. Here also you find two of very few female Shakespeare characters that are detestable (the other being Tamora).

>Othello
I love how Iago tricks Othello into wanting to know more about what's going on by playing coylike. It sums up the best way to maniuplate, like how the bastard manipulates in King Lear.

>Julius Caesar
Highlights: tell your wife everything. Trust your wife. if you're wise, you'll know how to look after your body. Don't trust a lean man.

should i quit my OK job to go drifting around the country and pick up work as a carpenter or should i stay at said OK job and bulk save for five years, investing it and living off the returns? i am 23, no family or friends or depenants, not depressed

It doesn't matter if you have no friends or not but what honestly matters is if you have a love interest that you're honest-to-god in love with. Read Proust. Read Shakespeare. Montaigne hated love because it restricted your freedom and that's one of very few things I don't vibe well with him because while I agree with him that it restricts freedom he never (as far as I've read) offers any solace. If you're not in love with anyone, you're not being held down by anything to do anything. I can see potential replies from someone coming in right now and reading this, saying, "Wow dude, you're a cuck," and to a very small extent they're right, but those people saying that have either 1) never known the feeling of having someone special whom they've loved gone for 1, 2 weeks and just wanting to SEE them or 2) HAVE had that, but then it was lost. Honestly, if I wasn't in love (and don't get me wrong--I love being in love and I love my baby, that's why I wouldn't leave her and I even forewent applying to schools outside my area where previously I thought I woudl)--I would do whatever the hell I wanted to, because why not? And, user... You don't even have FAMILY?

I will say though that I do have a friend that took a traveling IT job (shitty job btw) after college and he absolutely fucking hated it and now because he travels 10/12 months he hates life because no friends, no love life, no family, and because he's traveling. (btw. read Seneca and Emerson for anti-travel advice). Also I will mention thank you for getting through the end of this post. I remind you I know nothing but I do know that at least 70% of the time I'm a happy guy.

Do u kno da wae?

Nobody knows the way, but I'll tell you this: I'm not going to reply to any more posts like this because I'm earnestly trying to get myself out there and tell you how I feel and what I think. If you really want to know the way, ask me, "Do you know the way to live life?" and I'll answer you truthfully. As it stands I'm going to continue to answer as autistically as I can because the more I read the more that seems to come out naturally.

Ansa me, u fool!

How do I get over my ex?

Wtf do I do with my life if I have no idea what I want to do with my life?

Rest assured, your life is going by as you are wondering what you want to do with your life. All you have to do is keep wondering and you'll be dead! Hope this helps :)

idk what that is

here's some advice I gave to someone who was worried about becoming a "werther-fag"
If the love is not reciprocated as in the case of Werther and Lotte then honestly go to the gym, read, and work on you, and I can tell you that it WILL GO AWAY as long as you limit all exposure to the girl in question. Check out Ovid's Remedia Amoris and some Plato and some Montaigne and anything else that'll help you become a better man. DO NOT EVER SEE THE GIRL IN ANY INSTANCE for as long as you can. Think Swann in Swann's Way: he was okay as long as he didn't see her, but once he saw her again, even after years, it was game over. It doesn't have to be game over for you though if you better yourself and maybe (though this shouldn't be sought out, because the best of relationships are by fortune), STUMBLE upon another girl.

Also: If you're going to call yourself Werther you better be well-equipped to back up that claim. Do you honestly think you're on Goethe's level? The dude was on such another plane that he didn't even need to read anymore and only resorted to Homer for the sound. Reach that level, THEN find a girl that'll turn you into a Werther-fag (because after all the point of Sorrows is that no matter how manly or great you are a girl will collapse it all), then return. Also, Schopenhauer's Metaphysical Love of the Sexes might help you, but honestly i wouldn't recommend it because even though he says that the romantics won't jive with what he has to say, I, as a "Werther-fag," do jive with what he's saying, and still see the romantic in the curmudgeon, especially elsewhere in "On Thinking for Oneself" where he has a short lamenting paragraph that might go unnoticed:

>The presence of a thought is like a presence of a woman we love. We fancy we shall never forget the thought nor become indifferent to the dear one. But out of sight, out of mind! The finest thought runs the risk of being irrevocably forgotten if we do not write it down, and the darling of being deserted if we do not marry her.

What's the problem? Are you happy? What do you like to do? Do you have a girlfriend? How old are you? Job? Work?
Answer those latter six questions for me. If you have nothing to worry about then don't worry about anything. Seriously, you don't have to become famous or rich. You seriously only ever have to make enough money to live, and make enough money to make whoever you want to date (or marry) happy. Other than that you should be able to substantially be happy on your own outside of work hours, and if you need help with that, let me know. This:

>I was told that someone cheats in Troilus
It was a sort of semi-cheat. Cressida betrays her not to love someone else after she's separated from Troilus. But the way it's played out it's hard to call it a cheat, especially in the context of a play so bitter and cynical of any romantic ideals.
Lear, yes, is hard to pick up on entirely, because there's so much to absorb. I would probably call it my favorite and Shakespeare's richest. The scenes of madness and Lear's communication with Edgar and Gloucester - Edmund's change at the end are the best scenes in all Shakes for me, and conversely among the best in fiction. The degree of downfall (from loving too much without enough rationality of all things) and revelation on mankind Lear has is unparalleled in degree. Hamlet might compete but Hamlet is really just the main characters play - Hamlet IS the play - while King Lear is a machine-work of several of his most fascinating, original characters - one where a sanely insane man of pure passion like Lear exist with a hyper-rational nihilist like Edmund. That's how i see it at least.
Winter's tale is an interesting choice too; pretty underrated.

1 Mostly the problem is I feel I'm living an aimless life. I don't have any passion for anything or any goals other than staying alive
2 No not really
3 Reading, drinking, merrymaking, and shitposting
4 No
5 29
6 Software development bullshit

>an honest-to-god good question

Do you think Macbeth told the captain in the first 3 pages of the book to sing his praises to Duncan knowing that the Thane of Cawdor had just died? And that this seemingly harmless, unspoken act of deceit ultimately led to his death?

The problem is that we still talk and she's my only friend but she's with her ex again and that kills me.

That is BAD news. Get friends immediately. I could NOT talk to an ex who's dating someone else. Go outside and go to the library. Do you already do that?

Do you have friends? A crush?

give me a sec i'm on the phone

I'm the guy who asked the question. Kinda with Montague there. I've been in love before. Reading, writing and making money feels like a better use of my time right now.

I asked my question because I assume you're older than me and have been at a similar cross roads to me (it's not an uncommon cross roads).

I don't see it as 'travelling' I see it as finding a nice town to settle down in. I've been in this capital city since I was born and I hate it.

Yeah I don't have a family. I like being free, though. If you didn't have your kinfolk, what would you do? It's not an easy question, is it?

Thank you for your kind reply, it's rare around this part of the internet.

>Do you have friends? A crush?
Yes. No.

Fortunately, a new semester is on the horizon (starting next week). And yeah, I don't know how I've done it so far. As you mentioned, not thinking about it helps. But sometimes it's the only thing I can think about. I go for walks once and awhile but spend most of my time in my room.

Should I end my friendship with her or how can I handle this friendship well given the situation?

End the friendship with her. Doesn't matter if you're on good terms, if you're not over her you're just making life harder for yourself.

Before I give you advice I'd suggest reading Montaigne, Martial, Plato, and Seneca for the best life advice. You might be looking for a "purpose," and that's a very strong word because most people inside and outside of Veeky Forums will say you need a purpose, and then there's some people like Nietzsche who say that the true philosopher wants nothing but leisure time. I myself in this Christmas break was struggling with a purpose because I wasn't reading too much and I was getting too much into my own head. I really would recommend finding a girlfriend and, given your age, maybe a potential wife. This is not guaranteed in the least to solve your problems but outside of that I can only tell you to not worry because 1) there's no point in worrying 2) God. Maybe read some Plato too.

Dude I would literally cut all ties with her. If you want my honest frank advice: homosocial relationships are superior to relationships with women that don't involve taking it to the next step. I.e., if you're not dating them, fucking them, or marrying them, there's no point, unless they're an older woman or a woman who drops the occasional advice. And to think IT'S A GIRL THAT USED TO DATE YOU and she's dating someone else? I literally couldn't physically stand talking to her imagining her being anywhere near the new guy. This:
Idk if this is bait or a trick. I've read Macbeth twice and have seen it live but to make sure I checked the first couple scenes and yes, Macbeth does not have any interaction with the captain. Can you give me a line reference?? I will give some kind of solid answer to the question of whether and where Macbeth set up his downfall and how much of it is due to fate... I will say most of it is due to fate and wanting more even though what you had was good enough (but that was out of his control because of his nature). Btw, thanks for reminding me, I'm going to be re-reading Macbeth now while I keep this page open.

To be honest, this woman has literally ruined me. I was depressed and suicidal after our breakup, we didn't talk for months. I went from being a happy, idealist to a narcotic nihilist over the course of a year. I've started picking things up again a bit. I think the only reason I can stand my friendship with her is because she absolutely gutted me emotionally. I'm practically a dead man. Few things bring me joy anymore. I stay friends with her because I'm afraid trying to end the friendship will make me feel melancholic where as now I just feel nothing. I don't know what to do. She was the most beautiful, funny, smart and sweet woman I've ever been with, but absolutely cruel at times and now a stranger-friend. I had unfathomable amounts of love for her, she killed it all. But she keeps the flame slightly kindled and it's hell.

Alrights thanks user

Fuck, man. Well, I'm going to give you the bad news and just say that no matter what I tell you no advice is going to be able to help you out. One of these days (sooner rather than later, I'm thinking) you'll come across the most asinine thing that you'd never think would have changed you being in love and being melancholic, and all will be better. This thing will likely come in the form of being a new girl in your life, but it could be anything.

Not to sound like a dick user, but it just seems like you want to talk about it, not actually get over it.

Maybe talk to someone meaningful, like a family member or an old friend.

I think you're right. Thanks for the advice, user. I think I have to follow it. And I trust that some new girl will come along and make all my past loves look silly. Kind of like that Johnny Cash song "Guess Things Happen That Way."

Maybe, user. But hey, I'm trying here. Anyways, OP gave me some good advice and I think I'm going to follow it.

Sorry, my punctuation is terrible, I missed a couple commas after "Duncan" and "unspoken".

Realize that she meant nothing more to you than the way she made you feel, and learn how to find contentment in yourself.