Best of Veeky Forums

Naked Lunch?

>"dude, seriously? like what?"
>dissertation on philosophy levels
every time i come to this board the degree to which you all look like self-absorbed fart sniffers increases. Veeky Forums is on par with /mu/ on the bottom.

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that was a good post in an otherwise pointless thread

timeless classic

For me the high point were the old Veeky Forums general threads where someone would ask about a topic, and you had to find excellent sources and a pirate link. they went on for a year and then died when Veeky Forums actually came out. I tried to maintain it, but apparently Veeky Forums doesnt read.

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E a s y

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Anyone have the baneposting pic with Plato, Joyce, Borges, Kafka, Chandler and other versions?

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Alrighty, that's all I have. gnight lads

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requesting "excellence in scrolling"

>im dead 4 my age tho!!
every time

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Pic related: The Laurie Penny Saga.

Is anyone else old enough to remember the Daniil Kharms incident? I think that was around 2013.

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No male citizens of Athens had to row in the fleet, afaik they were all slaves

love that memory

Socrates was fat and ugly.

>t. jelly skinnyfat soychildren

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Are you ok? You don't have to take these factual challenges to your post so personally.

socrates and alcibiades origin story in xenophon kind of scuppers them being navy even though navy were rarely slaves. poor, but not slaves. supplying your own armour/arrows, etc. was a barrier to other service, but the navy was mostly citizens. which is why the citizens families voted to off generals for not saving rowers from a storm in the build up to socrates death and demosthenes defeating aeschines too late to save attica from macedon.
>tldr: stfu and row

You're right, I vaguely remember my Greek history teacher telling me slaves were at least used more at the start to row, because they couldn't find anyone else to do it, but even that's possibly wrong. Strange how Socrates did end up serving in the army, though, despite being notoriously poor, maybe his friends bought his shit for him

>ignorant unfounded wrong opinions
>facts

Oh God, I remember this meme. There were hundreds of variations. I still don't know what the original one was, but most of the early ones retained an eagle or bird flying in to perch on something.

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Socrates was literally fat and ugly.

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An incompetent philosophy lecturer was teaching a class on moral properties.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship the is/ought problem. You must accept that it's fundamentally impossible to get an 'ought' from an 'is' using empiricism.

At this moment a brave atheist, with a PhD in neuroscience and who had over 45 million youtube debate views stood up.

"Raping a child is wrong/bad/negative."

The arrogant professor smirked quite Scottishly and smugly replied,

"On what basis, you stupid STEM-tard? Raping a child is a descriptive statement. You are prescribing a normative value and implying it 'ought' to be a negative thing."

"Wrong. The entire debate resides inside a semantic framework with the concept of normative having no relevance. All we have are 'IS' statements based on empirical observation, and various forms of the verb 'TO BE'. There 'IS' a Child; the Child 'WAS' raped; a governing body 'HAS' decided that it's a punishable offense; you 'ARE' crying about 'oughts'; and you 'ARE' ignored while punishable offenses 'ARE' influenced by empirical observation, economic trends, social pressures and other forms of 'IS'. Your so-called normative 'ought' has been demolished because we can and do form policies and decisions inside inter-subjective semantic models, and individuals voice their own subjective 'IS' statements to collectively influence the framework."

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of A Treatise of Human Nature. He stormed out of the room crying about what he ought to do. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, David Hume, wished he had embraced New-atheism.

The previously faux-Christian contrarian students erupted into applause and declared that moral values are officially in the hands of science. An eagle named "the scientific method" flew into the room and perched atop the copy of "The Moral Landscape" and shed a tear on the hardcover. The last sentence of "the God delusion" was read several times, and the Pope declared that morality does not come from God.

The professor lost his tenure and was executed by Hume's guillotine the next day.

The brave student's name? Ham Sarris.

I can't remember any contemporary references, but I know Socrates gets mocked a lot for his shoes always being on point. Dude was OG, most of his poverty was elective, and based in looking like a Spartan warrior faggot artisan.
A lot of the time Spartan/dirty/not having more than a cloak is the Attic way of saying "raging faggot, lock up your young sons", so most of poverty attributed to Socrates is part him saying "i'm a rebel go sparta" and part commentators saying "what an utter poofter".
Xanthippe probably had more bank, but he married her late and pissed her off with his shit. Masonry's pretty solid work til your protege gets accused of defacing statues and sucking your cock, so he probably wasn't very hard up

>Oh God, I remember this meme. There were hundreds of variations.

Just fished the very earliest one out of the archive. They peaked around 2014 tho.
Tue Feb 7 20:54:08 2012

"An atheist, communist, ACLU lawyer professor was teaching a class on Karl Marx. "Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and accept that Marx was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, greater than Jesus Christ!" At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL stood up, holding a rock. "How old is this rock, professor?" The arrogant professor smirked and smugly replied "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian." "Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real… then it should be an animal now." The professor was visibly shaken. He dropped his chalk and stormed out of the classroom. The students applauded and all registered Republican. An eagle flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. That flag waves until this day, despite the lack of wind in the classroom. Semper Fi."

>I know Socrates gets mocked a lot for his shoes always being on point
I swear there are only two dialogues of Plato's that mention this, and for specific reasons, one being the Symposium, and I think the other was Timaeus. For the Symposium I know it was to juxtapose his ugly features, and was sort of an inverse of the attributes Alcibiades attributes to him in that dialogue (ugly on the outside, beautiful on the inside), and, in fact, I think Socrates only jokingly tries to look beautiful to kind of mock them, then gives a speech in his own style, without the sorta rhetorical flourish of Agathon, Aristophanes etc. I'm super drunk, and haven't read this shit for a while, but when Socrates is made to look nice in terms of dress in Plato, it's always ironic

To expand, Socrates making an ugly thing look nice makes fun of the sophists/rhetoriticians who do the same thing with their speeches

I'm not much into Plato, so like I said, no contemporaries. But it's a running joke in later works too, and it's always "but the sandals are Veeky Forums af"
Symposium's mostly lies - I remember that much, like Aristophanes has a good contest for most non-fiction with The Clouds fart trumpets after it.

inebriated classics lit best lit but I've to show up stoned to a kid's bday part. later, homo

Just wanted to say I'm a complete fucking random that saw this thread on Popular Threads and this post is absolutely glorious. Peace out

>Peace out
venus in furs is a very cheap book not just a song, you know, just before you leave

>hypersphere
do you have screencaps of that dude who actually bought it?

where can you actually buy it

i think there's a few sellers on lulu

going to cop one for the next Veeky Forums meetup

please go with your next suicidal impulse

It is a shame that nobody got the screen of "oily smarts"

here's the whole thread :
warosu.org/lit/thread/7540190

what the fuck did I just read?

No, it's Legacy of Totalitarianism in a Tundra. This was the peak of Veeky Forums. We actually made some retard spend money on our book.

makes me laugh every time

>Basta per stasera
>Continues
Just for this 0/10.

>2004

this thing is old as fuck

Does anyone have that story about taking a class with DFW, and how he would dry clean his track suits?

It's weird, I can't remember if I was in that thread or just a thread where that pic was posted, but i definitely remember shitposting on those words

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I'm still flabbergasted that this dude got as high as a 61% on this.

yo...

pls post the kharms incident, i'd like to be educated, thanks

>contributed many things like olives and anal sex
>funny :)

What kind of fucking degenerate teacher or school was that?

>they can't even into subjunctive case

Truly Veeky Forums... is everywhere and nowhere..

>The instructor redlined his work and misspelled "too"

Does anyone have the one of this, but for Carli?

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Better than food looks so goofy its unreal. And he thinks he looks so good too which adds to it

Oh damn this still makes me feel bad.
It wasn’t all Veeky Forums‘s fault.

Her mum is a greedy control freak who needs to stop having kids.