Why do we hate this man again?

Funny he seems to know so much but still writes terrible novels for children. Why he do this tho?

He regularly sexually assaults cheerios.

Big if true

Shut the fuck up fagrot, I fell in love she just didn't love me back. Apart from that, yes.

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It is very difficult to respect a self-emasculating man.

it started out as a joke. My friends had joked about it - even egged each other on to try it. We all laughed at the concept.

Fucking a bowl of cheerios? The mere idea sent shivers down my spine. The initial roughness in texture. The cold milk shrinking my erect PENIS.

"What joy could there be in that?" I thought to myself.

After a few weeks nobody brought it up anymore. We'd moved on to different jokes and catch phrases as most groups do. They weren't as funny, but they definitely weren't as weird. We did the usual things and Friday was drinking day. By 2:00 am all four of us were plastered. Jake let out a long sigh after pounding another shot of SoCo and Kevin was loudly snoring on the couch. After a twenty minutes or so it was just Steve and I alone left finishing off our remaining beers.

"Dude hold on," Steve smiled. "What's up man?" I said in my drunken stupor.

Steve sloshed his way over to his refridgerator and removed a gleaming white bowl from the fridge. I instantly knew what it was.

"What the shit fuck is that Steve?" I asked "Fuckin Cheerios man. You should fuck them!" He seemed excited. "Dude it was just a joke. Don't tell me you…" I was cut off. "Naw dude I didn't fuck no cheerios. But I will bet you $50 you won't do it." I had my excuse. "Fine fucker I'll do it." I was becoming erect already. "How will I know you did it, huh?" I froze up. My erection started to die. "Is this some elaborate ploy for you to see my fucking dick, bro?" I shouted, nearly waking our sleeping companions. "Nah dude I just don't want any fucking cheating, man. I got $50 on this shit." "Fine, I'll do it with my back to you and just stick my dick out through my fly." I was erect again.

We both went silent. I carefully walked to the corner of the room and looked down upon the soggy mash of Cheerios awaiting my erect cock.

They were Honey Nut.

Entire story here
pastebin.com/CbnXKwn0

How much tight adolescent pussy do you think John Green gets?

I...maybe I should look more into this YA author thing, huh.

Because he repressent the Alt-Right or something

what the fuck

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it's annoying me that there's not been any actual critiquing of his writing technique or plotlines
I haven't read any of his books though, my hatred of him comes from his essentially being a teen fiction writer, yet people much older than this rave over his books like they're learning something actually profound and not something that they should have been taught/learned when they were teenagers
also I've read a couple of pages and he, almost autistically, doesn't know people speak in real life, his teenage characters' dialogue seems like someone trying to emulate shakespeare (pretty poorly), it's like he's trying to make every line of dialogue lines of poetry and stands out shockingly

He ran over our cat.

>mfw this is totally fine in Green's world

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Sounds like capitalism is a good thing.

he's starting to look like Himmler

I'll be reading TAtWD in a third year fiction course this summer, alongside many other YA novels.