Douchebag coworker keeps fucking with my car, what would you do?
> dropped two dead birds inside a soda cup in my drivers seat
> regularly parks 1" from my drivers side door
> ziptied my driftshaft
If I find a way to get him in trouble he could get kicked out of the military because he is already in a world of trouble after getting caught drinking underage.
Camera time OP
Ruin his life lol
tell your parents he touched your wiener
Gopro my dude
cut his brake lines and pray for the best
He has a crush on you
Egg his windshield, keychain the car, potato in the exhaust, let your imagination flow.
Brick through windshield, or regularly let air out of his tires
>letting someone fuck with your car
>asking Veeky Forums what to do
Just hit him a few times you fucking faggot.
How much of a beta bitch are you??
>Pour a few gallons of gas on his car
>chuck a storm match at it from a safe distance.
Or this if you're not a faggot.
cut his brake lines
>buy circle bologna
>put bologna on car
>leave as long as possible
>laugh uncontrollably as it ruins his paint and leaves polka dots on it
>Douchebag coworker keeps fucking with my car,
You should not have started the war.
As a soldier, perhaps you couldn't resist.
How did he get dead birds inside your car?
Fuck his car up in return.
>brake fluid on paint
>chain padlocked to driveshaft
>cut brakes
>cement rearview mirrors at impossible angles
All of this can be done in 5 minutes if you prep well.
piss in his gas tank.
>let air out of tires
>pour in ammonia
>reinflate
The ammonia will take some time to deteriorate the rubber. Add some mineral motor oil if you want to be sure. Under pressure, it will slowly sweat through the slowly deteriorating rubber to make the tires extremely slippery.
where is your nutsack?
in his fucken purse.
grab some used oil and drop it in the front of his car where he can see it.
>do nothing
if he fucks with your car again stab a bitch already!
wtf are you 6 years old?
Beat this cocksucker to a pulp in the bathroom (or anywhere with no surveillance cameras)
If any superiors confront you and asks what happened literally deny everything and take it to the grave.
Bet he doesnt touch your car again
>go out drinking with him and get him wasted
>fuck him in the ass
>take pics
>put copies of the pic in random places
this
and throw a mattress in his swimming pool, it'll take a crane to get it out
He is clearly fucking hitting on you man. Tsundere, just need to get the dere going and he's yours.
>If I find a way to get him in trouble he could get kicked out of the military because he is already in a world of trouble after getting caught drinking underage.
So... He's old enough to go to war but not old enough to drink? How the fuck does that work?
That's USA.
Say that he raped you.
He deserves a whiff of a black forest dropped into his car if he ever leaves it unlocked or the windows cracked.
...
17-20.9999999999999
slash his tires and paint 'nigger' on his house
Sugar in the gas tank
Silicone his doors shut.
Fuck his girlfriend and then fuck him
jizz on his door handle every day until the pranks cease
this.
or just piss to show dominance.
The best thing I used to do as a young, delinquent, piece of shit was buy fish from the local market, put it in a pie tray and leave it out in the sun.
That shit starts to leak the nastiest smelling juice into the pie tray. Use a turkey baster, suck it up, and shoot it into his a/c vents. He will have to junk the car, it's that bad.
take a few cans of mousse and freeze it. while its frozen, cut it in half with a hack saw. leave the cans in the car. when they defrost, theyll expand many times their volume. pic related
puncture the fuel tank or weld the fuel door
Can I get some context on this?
...