Don’t be a cuck, buy a truck

Don’t be a cuck, buy a truck.

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Don't be a fagaro drive a Camaro

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Don't be a _____________, drive a ____________!

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don't be a brute, buy a 'ute

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Be reckless - drive Lexus

>hobo
>backhoe

What do I win?

don't be a grangran buy a minivan
kill me

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is that a Tacoma with a Mercedes badge?

dont be a faggot, ride dick no homo

No. In-house designed Mercedes pickup truck. It's going to be launched everywhere except America, the country that buys more trucks than any other.

Trucks are for blue collared rednecks and are slow, heavy, and not aerodynamic at all

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Nobody is going to buy that in America for a long list of reasons.

It would have to appeal to US workers and compete directly with the Silverado/Sierra, F150, and Ram 1500.

yeah because Americans know it will be an unreliable piece of krautshit

yeah haha!
i love seeing literally nothing in the back of your truck
don't even have to worry about you fucking any women

Does that abomination look or remotely compare to any of those? Is this what Europeans think we want in a truck?

>the biggest manufacturer of work vehicles in the world
>bad
Aren't like half of all the semi trucks brands in the US owned by Daimler?

Only cucks drive trucks

>semi trucks
>the vehicle archetype of which nearly all are identical between continents

BE A KEK
DRIVE A TRUCK

be as pleasant as an STD, drive an STI

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We drive real semi trucks in America not that euro cabover trash.

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Be a man, drive a van

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semi trucks aren't the best selling vehicles in America. That would be the F150, Silverado, and Ram 1500.
When did semis enter the conversation? Oh wait. They didn't until you strawmanned Americans

>Don't be a __Masterbator__, drive an _Excavator___!

but those things are utilitarian as fuck. i want one in my vehicle collection

IS YOUR DADDY BLACK? GET A CADILLAC!

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Dont be an arab, drive a sprinter carib

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fuckin pikeys

Trucks are the ultimate cuck mobile though. You pay out the ass to haul air and look like you have little dick syndrome.

Dont be a fuck, drive a puch!

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Yeah and driving a $100k sports car screams I got a 9 incher....

don't be gay drive a 747

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at least he can go fast in a sports cars

>semi trucks
>used for the same purposes as a standard full size truck

try again sweetie

That's the same thing. Any form of showing off or acting out implies your dick looks like it was transplanted from a toddler. Real men don't give a fuck what other random people think and drive what suits them best, of which there are many options in the low to mid price range.

doesn't rhyme you homo.

are 460/61s attainable in decent condition and sub 100k? i might import one any eurofags?

be really noice, drive a bentley

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But you can't because sports cars have 1'' of clearance and the roads are littered with potholes and speedbumps. Even matt in his brotruck can double the speed limit in the twisties in his lifted 3500.

That’s literally Canada

Were basically America just richer, fitter and nicer.

Why do trucks with straight six engines have two stacks?

Canada is not a country. It's America's hat

Eurocuck soyboy detected.

Trucks these days can actually go fast

Yet they can't stop fast and have shit handling. Truck cucks are responsible for a ton of wrecks in my area. The aggressive driving goes along with the needledick mentality.

Esthetics. Same reason they build higher trim econboxes and cuckovers with dual exhaust exits

I love how salty Veeky Forums gets about pickup trucks kek

Can someone give me a legit reason Why? A modern pickup is infinitely more practical as a dd than a sports car. Especially in places with bad roads and bad weather

Unless you're Afghani, stop liking Pagani.

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fox and grapes

probably because they're way bigger than necessary. The ranger/b-series was all 99% of people needed

canada is asia

>fox and grapes
>about a 16 second quarter mile

That's a shit argument. Theyre hardly larger than a comparable truck from 20
- 30 years ago. Bloated, yes. But not fuckhuge.

All new vehicles are bloated as fuck in Murica thanks to safety regs.

>drag racing is the only thing in life
how does it feel to be a cuck

My reasons based on observations in my area:

> Absolute white trash owner base
> LEDs everywhere, always on
> Lift it and don't aim the headlights
> Diesel smoke all day everyday, have to close my windows when there's one near me
> Straight pipes and/or megaphone tips annoying as fuck noise
> Always driving far below the speed limit unless on the highway, in which case they're tailgating whatever is in front of them

lazy/10 you can do better

Because trucks are LITERALLY the Chad of vehicles. Big, strong, safe, fast, attracts all potential mates, and overall superior to 80% of the beta vehicles on the road. Trucks are the Chads while crossovers are Stacies.

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why

It's a Navara with Mercedes badge

That'd be like me hating ae86 or 240's or civics or literally anything cheap and sporty because of all the faggots with no taste buy them, destroy them or boirace them.

>Don't be a fucker, just chucker in the 'ute mate

HAHAHAHAHAHA

You can get Silverados with 6 piston Brembo's up front. Aggressive driving? Coming from a place that advocates "shredding the twisties" that's a little ironic.

You remind me of this guy.
youtube.com/watch?v=oQ8osepOya0

I genuinely like trucks but can't justify the cost. They're like $40 grand bare bones, guzzle gas and are hard to park and maneuver in a city.

Brah, if you can afford a 60K F-150 you can probably afford to have someone do dirty work for you.

Well, that's normal behavior from a subhuman. Almost all subhumans drive trucks in these parts.

What does $40k get you in the shitty land of crossovers? A lifted fwd shitbox with a 2.0t? You can get a nicely loaded GM or Dodge for $40k. That $40k truck is still 350hp and does 60 in 6 seconds.

The vast majority of people lease their mall crawlers. Dealerships are always offering 2 year zero maintenance packages on trucks. So even your average trades guy can afford a $60k xxdudebro#browning edition truck. People with trucks usually have toys that they haul with the truck.

I've got 3 trucks (they're rc though) if I want to haul anything I'll borrow someone's and let them use my 44 mpg shaggin wagon

Chad is trucks, Brad is american muscle cars

Sorry Jeremy nobody gives a shit about your Subaru STI 4 banger.

Wanna blow a guy? Drive an STI

Pushover, bulldozer

If you had 90k hp, you wouldn't care about rhyming

$40K in the land of shitty crossovers will get you leather, heated and cooled massaging seats, adaptive cruise control, so many safety features you could fall asleep at the wheel, keyless entry with proximity locks, auto climate control, XM radio, auto parallel park, foot sensing tail gate, HID auto headlights, auto start, power adjustable seats, seat memory, 10 USB outlets, auto wipers ect ect.

40K in the land of pickups gets you (maybe) 4 wheel drive and bed without a liner.

But hey, manly dude.

wanna look fabulous around the S-bend? get yourself a Miata, girlfriend

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Do you want a truck or a fucking lattemobile? Your average mall crawler spec truck will have 8/10 of those features.

>leather, heated and cooled massaging seats
haha gay
>adaptive cruise control
gay
>so many safety features you could fall asleep at the wheel
more like, you could blow the guy in the passenger seat while driving
>keyless entry with proximity locks
gay
>auto climate control
gay
>XM radio
XM? more like se"X" "M"en because if you listen to XM then you want to have with sex with men
>auto parallel park
so gay
>foot sensing tail gate
so you can open the tail gate while double fisting cocks
>HID auto headlights
"oh no its dark i dunno what to do, maybe suck dicks?"
>auto start
i didnt even know this existed but im sure its gay
>power adjustable seats
gay
>seat memory
the seat remembers how gay you are
>10 USB outlets
plugs to remind you of mens anuses
>auto wipers
it can auto wipe the spooge off your face

this post is shit but i spent too much time formatting it so im submitting it anyway

I laughed a little too hard at this. But yeah there's a reason why those companies spend 80 billion on superbowl commercials showing bearded guys hauling bulldozers. The profit margin is ridiculous

Want to be a turbo faggot? Drive a WRX

>being such a peasant that you need to do manual labor
>being such a peasant that you have to live in shit places
>bragging about being a peasant

I'll just hire dumb muscle for all the work I need, let them torture their lifted vans for a meager sum. I make more by having you haul my shit than what you'll ask me, so larp that you have the last laugh.

>Vietnam
>25 years limited lifespan for trucks
understandable to be fair

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