Son, when are you going to bring home a girl?

Are you going to do anything about it? Or are you just going to keep posting frogs on a scandinavian kite-flying imageboard?

fuck off mom you're ruining my memes

My sister got married to chad and my brother is a millionaire. I think that's good enough for them.

Then why would they be disappointed?

Son, don't talk to your mother like that. I'll beat the living shit of you if I ever hear that language again in my house, you understand? Now go to your room!

Is it good enough for you?

>I think that's good enough for them.

But is it good enough for you?

if they're that old they most likely were just like you at your age. they'd be happy if you had a gf and were on your way to starting a family but they probably don't want to expect from you more than they themselves did.
you can repeat what your dad did and that would be acceptable 'by definition' or exceed everybody's expectations. it's harder to do the latter but the choice is yours t b h.

Going to ask a girl on my course if she wants to study for a upcoming exam together

Doubt it will work out

Told my mum, she wished me luck

I could hear in her voice that she didn’t think it would work out either

Get rekt you faggot

Damn same, bro, and she flat out stared at me while I was jerking so I think she 'mired

>telling your mother about upcoming dates

lol

what if he is 40?

Gains > girls

>you can't have both
*tips fedora*

then he would start by saying he's 40
or so I assume

Don't talk to me or my son ever again

lmao

im 28

Just ask her out instead of using the study course as an excuse you stupid idiot

>flirting with this qt grill
>she is interested in me because she laughs at my jokes and tells me I am funny
>I tell her that I can OHP her easily
>she didn't knew I lift because I never bring that up to topic (I always use comfy sweaters so she didn't see my dyel tier gains)
>now she always wants to touch me
This sunday I'm going to confess my feelings to her.
Wish me luck, bros.

Don't. What feelings? That you are desperate for attention by a female? Just stay yourself, and go on dates with her. That you love her? Don't be an overwhelming faggot.

Good luck, bro.

>I tell her that I can OHP her easily
What a fucking Chad

We've had a couple of dates.
Thanks, mane.
I wish, I'm a fucking nerd. Girls just like jokes.

>mom
>who is this?
>mom its me
>who
>your son, user
>oh. what is it this time
>mom im going to study with a girl
>ok
>a real live girl
>sure
>and im going to try to date her
>if you say so user
>mom im serious
>are you sure this girl isn't just one of your animes
>mom
>i have to go now, your brother chad and his fiance are visiting

>'oh i'm sorry i have a boyfriend'

>i really like you
>i really like you too user! You've been like a brother to me!

> i tell my mum when i plan to approach girls

Yeah i can tell you are going to fail

That's fine, if you get friend zoned, you can leverage her to get other girls. For example, find a second girl and get friendly with her, then host a potluck at your place where you invite both girls. Then you flirt jokingly with the first girl who friend zoned you (and who therefore feels safe to flirt with you). When the party is over, ask out the second girl who, having been nettled with jealousy, is surprised and flattered you're picking her over the first one.

Then as you're fucking her, tell her about how you worked your ploy; for some strange reason, girls are super turned on by guys who have nothing to hide and can play them openly.

>bring home
>still living with your parents
Never, apparently.

Why do people do this?
You dont tell a girl you want to fuck her, you just do it.

You dont tell a girl you want to date her, you just invite her to a date.

You dont tell a girl you wanna be her bf, you simply try your best to become exactly that.

Dont fucking "confess" to her, just do it.

Its super cringey and awkward bro.

fuck that mate, just rail her then and there

>You dont tell a girl you want to fuck her, you just do it.

the last time i did that i had to spend 2 year in jail afterwards...

kek

>tfw 23 and both mine are over 70
>tfw never had a gf
>tfw always either shot down or leadon
>tfw I fear I'll never give them grandkids

>implying girls will be interested in you when you still live with mommy

kek, if they're 16, maybe.

/thread

the fuck is a "mum"

...

>phonefags

>losers that spend too much time on the computer

u r a loser

>mfw i just spent wasted 2 hours fapping and skipped a college class so i could get extra sleep

w-winning

>posted from gaymin pc

w-w.....just end me

>kek, if they're 16, maybe

>implying 16 year old pussy isn't sweetest pussy

you're a fucking idiot

You dont need to confess but considering how hard a girl screens before she dates/fucks/grants bf status to a guy you might want to strategize accordingly
You wanna be her bf? too bad so do 100 other dudes and thats the lowest stat, have her as a ONS then it might be thousands if you live in the city
You dont just "do" user, otherwise we´d all be happy and have that gf we want instead of being lonely on Veeky Forums

you can confess to them if they're open to things like that, but still is a risk if you don't know that well. But for girls who play the "game" and are mysterious n shit don't ever play this card

U got tricked! XD

but seriously tho europoor TRASH need to leave my AMERICAN board

dont you sissy faggots have some arabs dick to suck?

>tfw started talking to a qt @ uni
>talk only about school and some random shit
>no idea how to transition from just friends to asking her out
H-how do I do it, Veeky Forums? Do I just ask her out for a coffee one day out of the blue? When will the time be right? I don't see her that often anymore, have lectures only 2 days a week.

>losers that spend too much time on their phone

u r a loser

>mfw i just spent wasted 2 hours fapping over facebook likes and candy crush and skipped a college class so i could get extra sleep

w-winning

>roasted from iphon

fucking autocorrect w-w.....just end me

Not any time soon, sorry.

And if you're wondering, yes it is your fault. Your mothering was pretty shit.

Like that other guy said, You dont tell a girl you want to fuck her, you just do it.

> literally too autistic to communicate
> thinks it's a good thing

Actually I get what you're saying (but it's Veeky Forums culture to imply others are faggots, beta, or autists). Yeah, don't constantly go around asking for permission, "can I hold your hand", "can I sit next to you", "can I kiss you", "can I lick your eye", etc. Girls hate that because it implies you can't read the mood correctly, you're too afraid of responsibilities of making decisions, and you like pushing those responsibilities onto others (her). Next to being a serial killer, there is literally greater turn off for a girl.

Just do what you have to do, and if she legitimately doesn't want it and says "no stop, you're raping me" you should stop because you're raping her.

"confessing" its so beta and weak, yeah there might be that 1/1000000 girl who thinks you are cute for doing that, all the others might not react badly to that, but that defo will leave a mark on that, making you look weak.

They just recently stop changing your diapers and cleaning up your mess, what makes you think they want to be near another kid?

>"no stop, you're raping me"

No, that's a test. If you don't keep going she's going to drop you.

Well seems like you know what i mean.

Thing is that guy was actually going to "confess" his feelings.

I think touching, kissing, cuddling, making out and sex are enough to show a girl you like her, you dont need to put it in words, its cringey and awkward (for the girl).

As said, there might be that 1% chance the girl will find it cute and give you a blowjob on spot but lets be realistic here....

dont bully me please

But women are fucking garbage, mom.

I'm dead insise

fuck off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is the saddest post

id rather not bring a girl home, fucking them at their place = me not worrying about my mom hearing me having sex

how awkward would that be

>"N-Next week, mom! Oh, you're gonna love her. Her name is Amanda and she's gorgeous."
>A-Man,Duh my newly transitioned friend walks into the apartment right as I hang up.
>Inform herm of the situation.
>We're totally going to make my parents think we're in love.
Intermission
>Get to my parent's place.
>"Hey, mom! 'Sup, pops?"
>"Mom, Dad, this is Amanda."
>Amanda passes better than Bailey Jay.
>Parents are stunned by herm.
>Everything is going fantastic until Amanda needs to piss.
>We can hear the stream.
>"Boy, that woman sure can piss with the best of 'em, huh son? Almost like she's standing up or something."
>"H-Ha ha... Same old dad."
>No questions after.
>Parents had a lovely time and look proud of me as we leave.
>Get back to the apartment.
>Start developing feelings for A-Man,Duh.
>Slink back into my home gym and curl up in the squat rack to cry myself to sleep.

>not just letting your mom join in

what a fag

>implying they didn't know
shoulders and jawline gave it away
the piss comment was just so you could reveal it

Holy shit did they have you in their 50's? No wonder why you're autistic

Why the fuck would you say that

i won't. i don't need a woman or kids to have a happy, successful, fulfilling life

People who browse this site are all the product of failed parenting in some form.

>beta as fuck father figure or none at all. bonus points if raised by single mother with psychological issues
>mother or father with psychological issues
>normal middle class parents but because they were always busy your were neglected as a kid
>really old parents

>beta as fuck father figure or none at all. bonus points if raised by single mother with psychological issues
Check and bonus check
>mother or father with psychological issues
No check
>normal middle class parents but because they were always busy your were neglected as a kid
No check
>really old parents
Check i guess, depends on definition of old but dad was aparently 45 (never heard from him)

Do i get a prize?

Are you suggesting a threesome?

>confessing feelings

just kiss her you idiot

I wish I lived in an anime

I just asked out a petite cute today and she said yes! Can't wait to stretch out her pussy and make all dicks after mine unsatisfying.

You can get a free internet hug from me because I'm pretty much in the same boat and I know how much that fucks your shit up. It's like you can't swim at all because you never learned, but everyone expects you to jump into the deep end. You can refuse and stay ashore, alone, or just go for it and hope you don't drown.

I've been talking to a girl online mom.
She's been giving me workout advice and has a cute feminine... You know

I don't know which is worse. When my parents kept asking me this, or now that they have stopped asking.

are you the MAN with the MEMES?
You know, the one MEME about certain CHARACTERISTICS of the male body?

Ffffuck this feel... my father died when I was five years old and my mother really couldn't deal with it.
At least I had Solid Snake as my role model

Guess ive been lucky, i got a good gf at 17 and been in a relationship most of my adult life
Got a good job and on my way to an education aswell
But it does fuck you up royally, relationshipwise too
as if girls didnt fuck your shit up in a relationship already ^^

If you could choose between living in a perfect matrix-esque VR anime world, or real life, which would you choose?

>parents always at work, raised by grandma and nanny
>happiest day of childhood is when it was summer and dad took me and my sister to town's public pool
>bonus points for literally being born in a town while grenades were flying around the hospital

I actually turned out pretty okay

If i could control the matrix-esque world id pick that
>super hot loving gf
>look how i want
>do what i want
>think what i want
Oh yes, beats reality any day

You would probably get bored with it pretty fast

But Mom, Blaha told me if i want to be an alpha male, i need to be fucked by one first. he told me i shoul let an 40 year old alpha male beast fuck my ass, its the only way. And Blaha said that girls are used by bolybuilders just to hide their closet homosexuality

You're not my mom!

Prolly, but im bored with real life too and there i dont have anything i want/need
In that matrix type reality i can figure out something to do and do it, if anything is possible shouldnt be too hard

How could you say that to me

>Girls just like jokes.
That's why she likes you then

If I wanted humor I'd ask for your 1 rep maxes

Some grils like you to say it

Some grils like you to just do it

I just did it with my last ex: grabbed her by the waist and kissed her while walking her to the car. I got away with it but in retrospect she told me she would have found it more romantic if I did the whole "Belle would you be my gf"