I'll be visiting the gym for the first time today

I'll be visiting the gym for the first time today.

Any advice, Veeky Forums?

Don't forget the lube

Tip the receptionist on your first day so they remember you.

read the sticky

call the gym and ask for a (free) personal training session where they show you correct form.

do not let them give you some normie no-gains meme routine

Already did, it covers more general fitness stuff. I'm talking more in the specific context of a gym.

Dont forget your lifting plug

>do not let them give you some normie no-gains meme routine

I always see the normies with some piece of paper they got from the gym with a meme routine. I want to warn them but i don't want to be that fag giving unsolicited advice.

>meme routine
explain pls

Rack your fucking weights. I feel like I'm the only autist in the gym that does this. Especially dumbells. Maybe because I live in nigger infested Houston people have become so used to leaving their shit everywhere.
Like I wanna REEEEE in the gym. PUT YOUR SHIT BACK.

Most gyms have their own shitty routines that they give to normies who ask for it. These usually are one body part splits using a ton of machines that will give you no gains.

Ah, I understand. My understanding is that it's best to stick to 2 or 3 machines per workout; is this correct?

>jogging on the spot between sets
>weightless lunges without even dumbells
>pushups off your knees between sets
>jumping jacks
>over-reliance on machines
>ab exercises when you aren't low body fat
i'd also stay away from reps above 8, just because it's hard to measure progress imo
same idea with full body routines

>tfw you were that guy with the piece of paper

>first gym session is today
>literally no gameplan
c'mon m8

what were you actually expecting to do?

you should know at least one gym rat IRL... so the best advice is go with him.

Get a routine from the sticky.

Make sure you know the deal with fees from your gym, like late fees, hold periods etc.
Get all those details in writing

Also get a routine from the sticky so you know what youre doing rather than just aimlessly walking around.

Make sure to wipe benches and stuff before you use em cause people are gross

Get a gameplan. Are you going to bench? Deadlift? Suck dick in the showers? Hit on that girl with a steroid pumping boyfriend? Cry in the corner and shitpost on japanese imageboards for indian chili cookers? The possibilities are endless.

If you've never been to the gym, you have no idea what you're doing and where to start.
If the counter guy is a gymbro and looks like he is in shape. Don't be afraid to talk to him about stuff.

You're gonna feel like a retard for a while.
After a few gym sessions though you can just walk around the machines and feel pretty confident about what you want to do.
You'll need a body goal.

all I see PTs doing at my gym (24h fitness) is having new clients do retarded shit like step-ups, smith-machine shit, stupid laying on the floor ab and leg raise bullshit, etc. All a PT really needs to do is teach you correct form and check your form on these exercises: squat, deadlift, ohp, bench press, bb row, pull-ups/pull-downs.. that's about it and that'll take you through a year or more if they program and teach you programming. they won't do this because it doesn't make you reliant on having a PT sell you some overly-complicated dumb bullshit

Don't drop the soap

Pretty much this senpai.
They'll just give you a meme routine for you to not take up too much space/time in gym while still paying for membership.

>find a routine: SS or SL is a good one for now
>start with low weight on every exercise to find your 5 rep max
>bring a towel with you to wipe your sweat off the benches n shit
>rerack your weights
>use good form and do NOT fucking ego lift unless you wanna look like a retarded noobie and severely injure yourself

that's about all I got for you

dont make eye contact with anyone in the lockeroom.

Why would you tip him? Literally for what service?

No shame in having paper with your routine written on. Everyone starts somewhere and needs to track progress.