Ask A Nurse Anything

What is your opinion on the ketogenic diet?

Feels great. Make a lot of money. Make a difference. Get hit on all the time by coworkers and have flings with them. Became a manager in record time because men are better nurses than women are.

Fucking hate sales. Tons of money in it though.

It's not a healthy diet, if that is what you are asking. Terrible for your liver, heart. It accomplishes the goal most people are seeking from it though. No one wants to hear "eat healthy and less and exercise". There is no magic formula that makes you lose weight, if that is what you are seeking. Even though it's not ideal, I'd still recommend that over nothing if you are morbidly obese.

are you filipino

I'm a white male.

I thought you people would have more health related questions. But any are fine.

I'm a dude in my early 20s and I noticed a hard lump under my nipple it seems to have gotten slightly bigger, should I keep ignoring it?

Quads. My bad.

I have a bad cavity that bleeds, I'm afraid of making out, regardless of sex, what do?

Did you become a nurse because you are gay, or did you realize you were gay after becoming a nurse? Also did Veeky Forums influence your homosexuality or did your homosexuality lead you to Veeky Forums?

If it's rock hard it could just be a cyst. Not that common in males unless you are taking test/roids. I just had a patient that had to have 2 JP blood drains hanging from his tits for 2 weeks after they took out all his cysts from admitted steroid use for muscle gain. Doesn't happen with everyone, though.

If it has a color on top of the skin, or it gets as big as a dime, or doesn't stop growing, go to the doctor. Could be a simple fibrous cyst that may never go away. Easy surgery if you so choose.

I'm a female and been considering using anavar. Would you or would you not recommend?

Also, I took an IUD a year ago. Then I had light periods 3 months straight after which they magically stopped. Then after some months I started having my periods pretty much normally as before I took the IUD. Is this a sign that it's not there anymore? I'm not having sex atm so it's not that important whether it's there or not, but I'm personally guessing that it's not there anymore.

Go see a general practitioner just incase its cancer

Can you please post your best fat person story

Hey bby want sum fug?

Your teeth cant bleed, so you have some massive gum damage. If it's constantly bleeding it needs to be checked out ASAP. Your gums are a direct access to your bloodstream, and open bleeding in the gums can lead to a whole lot of heart and immunological problems. If you don't have any blood borne disease (HIV, AIDS, etc) then make out until you drop of heart disease from your bleeding tooth.

I am married, have a son, own a house, 2 cars, etc. Pretty standard white guy in his early 30s.

I sleep on my back with my hands on my chest/stomach. Recently when I wake up my pinkies and ring fingers are tingly or numb. I smoke and drink too much. Is it a sign of damage from smoking and drinking or is it likely to be nerve pressure from the position I sleep in? Like elbows pressed into the mattress for 7-8 hours acting like a pinched nerve.

What was your method of study to learn the musculoskeletal system?

Ahh,so still in the closet. Gotcha.

It's bigger than a dime, also a noticeable visible difference. I guess I'll have it checked out

It's hard to recommend steroids to people looking for mass gain for me, as it's typically not healthy and can come with a lot of side effects that are generally no good (heart and liver problems, cancer, etc). That said, it's probably the most easy to tolerate anabolic steroid on the market, and if you made me pick one it would be Anavar.

IUDs normally normalize at around 3 months or so. You should be having regular periods (or even slightly heavier ones). Unfortunately there is no great way to tell that they are still in place without visualization. You can do this yourself, but owch, I don't recommend it.

I have too many. One of the gross ones involved fat roles and lifting them up to see open bleeding tissue from stretch marks in the creases that were also filled with this dead skin and sweat paste that lookes like smegma.

Probably a bit of both. While smoking is detrimental to the circulatory system, it's probably 99% a positioning problem. In fact you'll find that doing this position while not sleeping will lead to that "asleep tingly" feelings, probably starting at the pinky's and moving inward.

I hate to say memorization, but, memorization. It's just a boring ass thing you have to do.

Whatever makes you feel better.

Yeah, go to a dermatologist or GP.

What makes the ketogenic diet dangerous for your heart and liver from your experience? I'm not putting you on the spot. I am genuinely curious. I am getting mixed messages about this eating regiment.

I was under the impression that the diet healed those issues.

Have you worked in an ER? If so, whats the craziest story you have?

Nice trips.
It all has to do with how ketones effect your body and what ketosis does (ketones are produced by the liver). I'm on mobile right now, but simply search "ketosis" or "ketones". The first results will have nothing to do with the diet, and more likely signs of diabetes, liver problems, kidney damage, etc. Also you smell like a cesspool when doing it. This, however, is much better than being a morbidly obese person, as that has muchore detrimental effects on the entire body than ketosis does.

Can you give me a protein injection? I want you to use the special thick needle on your crotch to inject into me my daily protein quota. Either the upper mouth or the lower mouth will do just fine.

A big black guy came in. He was oozing from multiple stab wounds on his gut and chest. Oddly enough, that isn't why he came to the hospital. While fighting against his attacker he suffered a heart attack and lost consciousness. I was shoving a tube down his nose when he came to and put me in a fucking death grip. 4 nurses and doctors tried to pry his hands off my neck but not before he choked me unconscious. Fun times. He died.

If you mean oddest ER story... this guy came in and said he accidently had something to far up his ass. Evidently this man did things on camera for money (I don't know what website). We took a can of chunky Campbell's soup out of his lower bowels. It was vegetable. I'll never forget. He acted like this was totally normal and fine throughout.

I'm a male nurse too. Hate it desu. What can you do with a nursing degree besides nursing? To keep it fit related: is it okay that I only use machines at the gym?

I think this is all the same gay guy.

Machines are fine. They just don't offer as much as free weights do.
You can get an informatics cert and get into the computing side of it. Research is growing and a lot of places use a nurse for that. Occupational health for a bigger company is easy street. Lots of options.

...

I've heard research nursing is low stress tier. Might give it a shot. Thanks bro

Nono that's fair. I am morbidly obese. And I am serious about weight loss. I've been to the Hospital twice. And I hate taking medicine. My dream is to be off it. I hope the diet would help but I am finding problems with it. Firstly I'm not eating junk on the diet. But I am noticing my breath smells TERRIBLE and I brush frequently. I had 2 weeks of acid reflux, I feel like it's not going away, I think I may even have gallstones developing. I'm going to a gastrointestinal doc. But I 100% know he doesn't know shit, all he does is crack jokes, and schedule an endoscopy.

I am otherwise fairly normal I have good prospectsof returning to normal if I drop 70 or so more lbs

Thanks for the answers man. I do trust you more than most of these cocksuckers.

Holy shit thats huge

No problem. Also brushing isn't going to relieve the smell, it's coming from your blood. When you breathe in, you are sending oxygen to your bloodstream (that is filled with ketones) and when you exhale you have that breath (yes, if you draw blood from yourself and put it in a cup, it would smell the exact same way). This also happens with any food that has a direct correlation to your blood, I.E. onions. Best bet is to just have some breath strips or mints on you. Good luck!

hey man, my lower leg changes temperature at times. This occurs specially when i pushed myself with said leg. I dance like crazy btw, Any suggestions?

Does it FEEL like it's doing that or is your leg actually doing that? Sounds like a neuro problem. No injuries to that leg?

No injuries done to the leg. It feels like it, and the feeling travels through the leg, but if i touch it, i dont really feel the change in temperature with my hand.

If it's neuro problems, am i fucked? if not, how much time will it take to heal?

Nursing student here, starting placements in a few months. How can I avoid looking like a fucking retard and get good reports?

Bonus question: have you considered becoming an NP?

I get cramps in the arch of my foot which pulls the big toe down and is painful. I almost never get cramps anywhere else. I did have a bone tumor removed from the large bone that runs on the inside of that foot and connects to the big toe, so there is some nerve damage. Any ideas on how to get the cramps to stop? Forcing the big toe up tends to help but its a pain in the ass.

Ive asked two doctors and they say "Well we can fuse the joint"

The joint doesn't hurt, the muscles pulling on the joint hurt. I stopped seeing those doctors but havent heard any ideas on a fix.

Lmao nurses shouldn't do PhD's tho.

>t. edgy med student

Needs to be properly assessed by a doctor who specializes in this. Sounds like nerve damage due to strain on hip or some other joint. I'd give it a rest for a week or more and if it doesn't improve, go to a doctor who can do a full work up.

Report is easier at first if you write it out, but in general just write down the main points. Why are they here, what did we do/what are we doing, IVs Foley drains etc, patient condition and attitude at present and the last time you gave a narcotic for pain. Done. If anyone gives you shit tell them to look it up. I'm currently working on my doctorate in nursing, and no, I've never wanted to be an NP.

Well, you can get nerve blocks done but they aren't permanent and it might not help. This is common even in people who haven't had surgery. Sometimes even moving the toe a little bit causes it, and it doesn't seem to happen during activity, does it? If it's normally at rest, this happens a lot. If not, I'd start doing stretching exercises. Getting better shoes also helps. This happens a lot to people who walk with thier feet out father than average. Let those little toes work for it too.

Thats a neat opinion.

He's kind of right though. You're probably better off doing pharmacology or something you have hands on experience in as a postgraduate degree, then doing a doctorate in that.
A doctorate in nursing will probably just get you into a management position for the nurses

thanks for the response mr.nurse.

have a good night

If it makes you feel any better if I flex my foot I get cramps in my big toe too, and I've never had any surgery in my legs. Sometimes it cramps up while walking.

I worked as nurse assistant for about 6 months OP. I have respect for what you girls do(sick burn).

Anyways, why are you going for PHD in nursing? Why not pharmacy or med schools? Nurse practitioners don't get paid anywhere near as much for basically the same amount of schooling.

How do I get a job within medicsl sales? I got a bachelor in business.should I go to nursing school?

>Well, you can get nerve blocks done but they aren't permanent and it might not help.

What is a nerve block?

>This is common even in people who haven't had surgery. Sometimes even moving the toe a little bit causes it, and it doesn't seem to happen during activity, does it? If it's normally at rest, this happens a lot. If not, I'd start doing stretching exercises. Getting better shoes also helps. This happens a lot to people who walk with thier feet out father than average. Let those little toes work for it too.

It almost exclusively happens when I am at rest. Mostly laying down, but sometimes sitting,

It does rarely happen when standing, but more often than not any discomfort when standing is joint pressure and popping the joint releases the pain. Arthritis from the deformation of the bone I assume, and why doctors say they can fuse it, but its so rare and not disruptive enough to justify the loss of a joint.

The joint pops when I wear sandals (like every step when i wear a specific pair) and sometimes when I am barefoot but I dont think that its related to the cramps in any way.

so I never used to really have a problem with my feet, but weighing 20ish pounds (fat cow at the moment) I have pain when I run seems like plantar farshitesis or w/e

in the past I just lose the weight and it goes away, but in the mean time is there anything I can do to help the pain? It's getting bad enough that when I walk or when I'm out there is still pain and it's not just after jogging

also, will the pain go away this time as I'm older and the last time I was fat was like 6 years ago?

What are the most complex patients in an orthopaedic ward?

I'm the nursing assistant.
I worked in the orthopedic area of my hospital. A nurse assistant does a lot of the dirty work, baths, helping patients pee/poop, rolling/turning patients, etc. They do a lot of what nurses do minus all the medication, medical info, dealing with doctors, etc.

Hands down the most complex patients are those who are immobile. Feeding, bathing, using the bathroom, every single thing becomes a chore because you have to move their entire body without help.

With a knee replacement, they can use the trapeze to maneuver some. They require help with their leg getting out of bed but they can typically walk with a walker.
Hip replacements can at least use their good leg to push and their arms with the trapeze. They will sometimes have a foley but, unless they're fat, it's just as easy to use a bedpan.
Shoulders are the easiest. People can walk just fine and wash themselves off.

For the most part, the orthopedic floor is the easiest when it comes to care. While it was the ortho floor, we also had non-ortho patients come in to help fill rooms. They were by far worse than the ortho patients. Guy with MRSA in his spine. CDIFF patients. AIDS patients. Sepsis patients. Legitimately sick people who are incontinent, infectious, and not very happy and their families. It's not very fun.

i didn't make into nursing school and now i'm getting my EMT license. Is this better or worse than life as a male nurse?

If you live in the middle of no where it'd probably be a dream job. You get paid to roll around town all day. If you're in a major city though I'm sure you'd be getting calls all day.

I already have a nice position lined up. Thanks though.

I'm not getting an NP. I'm getting my doctorate.

I don't know as I abhor sales. They generally like to have someone with a medical background over other professions.

A nerve block stops you from feeling in certain nerves. Sounds like your problem is fairly common though. It happens with any strenuous activity and probably more so with your previous surgery to the site.

Stretching before you run, and spreading your metacarpals buy applying pressure like squeezing them will help. Make sure you have godlike arch support in those shoes and run heel to toe if you are currently running to to heel. I recommend higher end ASICS and New Balance. Elevating them above heart level after running will also help.

Orthopedic surgery. Total hips and knees, some maxillofacial surgeries, spinal fusions.

EMTs are a different breed of man. I'd rather be an EMT over a nurse any day... if it paid the same. You generally have more action and down time as a EMT than a nurse does.

>I'd rather be an EMT over a nurse any day... if it paid the same.
that's the vibe i've been getting from what i've looked at, but shit man im 23 and the thought of working fast food and just waiting to apply again next year makes me want to fucking shoot myself. At least with EMS certs i can make decent money instead of minimum wage.

Lots of EMS bros become nurses. You could gain some great experience.

Is there anything better for inflammation than ibuprofen? I have swelling around my jaw from tmj/tmd.

Also, what's the best thing to do about knots in the shoulders? Should I suck it up and get a massage? It's causing chronic pain at this point.

Not really, other than steroids that will fuck you up and cause a lot of other symptoms. If you're really having chronic pain you need to look at your sleeping conditions and overall posture. How supportive are your shoes? Are you in a position that requires you to sit for long hours? Chairs without arm rests do this. If it's from working out (which I believe would help the problem, not make it worse) then video tape all exercises that use shoulders and see where you're making errors.

Why do you think being a nurse gives you any sort of credibility when you literally sit around barking orders at a cna to make up for the fact that you're a low ranking med surg nurse who can't function without a doctor telling them what to do?

Also what color are your undies?

I work nights at a place PRN that has no tech or aide on nights. I get all my own vitals and clean up my own shit, thanks.

Halloween jackolantern boxers. Black background.

>bad breath
ever cough up little white stones that smell really bad? get a torch and look behind your tonsils with a gentle swap you might have these en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tonsillolith

you have a bad case of DYELitis
i recommend one workout a day asap

>i check blood pressures and clean poop up and give people their insulin but please ask me questions like I'm a physician or something

Ya, these comments usually come from med students who have no idea what's really going on and see the patient maybe 5 minutes a day. It takes all of us, ya doink.

Hormonal IUD or copper?

I've had the hormonal IUD for 5 years now. I go months with out a period, and then sometimes I'll go months with a regular quasi period. Like 1-3 days of light spotting. Once in the last 5 years have i had a period heavy enough for a tampon. From what I've heard from my friends who have this IUD, its normal to have periods and its normal to not.

im a fourth year surgery resident, gonna specialize in cardiothoracic surgery, now go give mrs johnson her xanax, murse, lol

Why didn't you make it to med school?

>i don't understand why i'm getting paged for pointless orders constantly at 3am this is bullshit

I'm a 23 year old male who's really paranoid about having cancer/something wrong with me but not knowing it.
I've gone to a doctors for a general checkup/ chat about it, but they just tell me I'm young, it's fine etc.
All I really want is tests to be done just to be sure/better safe than sorry but no one takes me seriously cause age.
Anyway to deal with this?
Symptoms
>mole on face with white circle around it
>Soft lump in right forearm thats developed
>Sometimes get pain that feels like an electric shock that feels like its running up through my gut/ the area between ass and balls but on the inside.
Am I just being super paranoid, or are these potential concerns? Not sure what to do at this point.
Also I've been developing a receding hairline for a few years now, but Ive recently started supplimenting ZMA, and ive noticed my hair shedding/loss has started slowly. Is this normal?

Sorry for this, couldn't miss an opportunity to ask insane inane questions, as I couldn't bring myself to ask a medical professional these in person.

That's the challenge. On my department, the staff will talk with a patient for 5 minutes tops, yet they always EXACTLY know their condition, treatment, previous treatments, progress and what is going on in his/her life.

>Am I just being super paranoid
yes.

Ex med surg turned critical care flight nurse/medic but okay.

How do I fix my shitty sleep cycle, not being able to fall asleep at 4am is shit. I've tried sleeping 4 hours a day for the past week and trying to go to bed at 10 pm but my body won't sleep till 4 or 5

Oh hai! I'm a flight communication specialist, I do the computer phone stuff for flights! I can't believe how many people we fly out for conditions from shitty lifestyles and eating habits.

Had this wart thing on my face for as long as I can remember, it's usually hidden behind my nose so I'm not to self conscious about it.

How do I get rid of it? Everything I've looked at for wart treatment says don't use on your face.

>pic related

go doctor, they can lazer it or freeze it off

wtf? I've heard about liver but not about the heart. heck my regular bp was 135-139ish before I started keto diet and after my 3 month keto diet it went down to less than 120 bp. I don't know what the fuck is going on but I like it a lot.

how do i get my pectus excavatum fixed.
went to my GP but he blew me off, i do believe it is affecting my lung capacity. he took an x-ray but just said it was fine and it was the weather.

i have no clue but i do believe x-ray wouldn't show lung capacity?

Can confirm Just got a wart snipped of my eyelid a few days ago at a dermatologist with only some bruising

Hey OP Im a student nurse in Singapore, how do you remain fit while having awful working hours

Don't get me started. I flew a person from our hospital to another one time for a pressure ulcer.

Our helicopter does 911 response and interfacility transport so we get some decent calls some of the time, but for the most part its rarely something that's urgent enough to not be able to go by ground

Where are you based? I do it for a couple different companies based throughout the south west states.

Virginia

My kneecap feels fucked. If i bend down sometimes it feels like something slid into something else and i need to get back up quickly and when i walk it can sometimes just hurt randomly, should i just keep ignoring it?

My feet hurt when I do leg press. I try to push with my heel but my foot still hurts in the arch.

Will I snap my foot?

You ARE fine. If that sensation becomes pain, I'd be worried. Also normal with hair. You may benefit from counseling.

That's not a challenge, that's poor patient care.

Your body needs time to adjust. One night of going to bed wont work. Take some benadryl and make yourself be devoid of stimulation when you go to sleep. No phone, no TV.

That didn't actually look like a traditional "wart". I'd go see a dermatologist to determine what could be done. Usually, if it is a wart, the skin can get pretty fucked up on sensitive areas like the face when removed. Go to the dermatologist and weigh the pros and cons.

Yes you are correct, x-rays don't show lung capacity, there are different studies for that. Depending on how bad yours is it might not be worth what is basically a cosmetic procedure. If it IS affecting your lung capacity I'd go to another doctor.

Making myself go to the gym after work 3 days a week and running 3 days a week. It's some bullshit but it's worth it.

Absolutely do not ignore any knee pain. Those are the joints that get all of your weight. Your patella may be slipping and wow does it hurt if it comes out or somehow gets released from the tendon. It has a lot of tension on it and if it separates below the knee joint it can roll back up into your outer thigh, which is a pain I'm told that is unbelievably have horrible.

I'm going to bed. Thanks for the questions, made the shift fly by. I'd also like to thank all the med students and doctors that answered questions. LOL.

Have a good day and always get a 2nd opinion and remember, doctors prescribe, nurses provide.

Brachial Plexus injury (loss of radial and partial median motor nerves) user here.

What are some things that I can do to prevent my hand from going all crooked like that butler from Scary Movie? Also, is it possible to get back range of motion if it feels really tight?

It's probably a mixture of posture and GAD. Are there any specific exercises that help loosen your shoulders? I already do the stretches with the door frame.

Is chiropractic therapy/ realignments complete horseshit? Sometimes you get a crick that you just can't stretch out and it feels injured. Figure I'd ask based on your doctorate focus

Y u no doctah?