Fat Coworker/Friend Hate

>work with fat ass 40 year old
>spends the majority of his day telling me about his WOD from crossfit
>tells me about all the burpees and wall balls he can do
>asks me about my routines and then proceeds to try and one up me with his INTENSE FUNCTIONAL STRENGTH
>asks me about diet sometimes
>legitimately told me he JUST discovered that peanut butter is high calorie
>says he usually sits in front of the TV and eats tablespoons of it straight out of the jar
>finally asks me for advice
>spend 30 min talking with him about diet
>thanks me
>one week goes by
>tells me he stopped w the peanut butter
>talks about his dinners he's made the past week
>they don't sound terrible
>tells me he hasn't had a soda in a week
But youre drinking one right now
>no this is a Mountain Dew Kickstart, it only has 80 calories
>bertstare.jpeg
What'd you have for breakfast?
>nothing, but I'm munching on these right now
>pulls out a pack of peanut butter cookies
Oh ok.
>see him walk to his desk and pull candy out of the drawer 30 minutes later

Why do I even fucking bother? This happens every time I try and talk to people about fitness.

I really am just gonna say I do Wii Fit and
>lol iunno high metabolism
from now on

Anyone ever actually helped someone or is it always like the above?

I have the same problem, but with skinnys.

No matter how often i tell how to get big, they never listen and just say " HURR I ALREADY EAT A LOT MAYYYN"

This. Me and another guy at work who works out try and get two skinny guys to build some muscle

Fuck you two are big cunts.
>You can be too bro. Just workout and eat lots
I already eat lots
>No you don't, write down everything you eat in a day and give it too me. I'll literally walk you through this step by step
nah man its impossible for me, I can't do it. You just have good genetics.
>Good genetics
>mfw super manlet and shit hair line.
>o-oh ok suit yourself

Fuck you're right, basically the same shit.

At least with them they aren't actively not eating, they're just dumb.

Fatfuck over here is just shoveling shit into his dick garage nonstop. It makes no sense. Dude, I JUST told you not to eat processed sugary crap last week
>b-but these donuts are all I had in the house

Then don't wine about being fat! I don't understand the thinking process at all.

Legit LOL'd because it sounds just like my mother in law. I unintentionally roll my eyes every time I hear her says wall balls or "balls to the wall".

>few years back, driving a long way to visit mother in law
>asks if she can pick up any specific food.
>I say, "it'd be nice if you to grab a few healthy things so I don't have to go shopping as soon as I get there"
>go to grab a snack later and see all the "healthy" food she chose
>Fat free ice cream, vegetable straws (they're actually just like potato chips), white bread and processed sandwich meat.

Dafuq?

Fascinating. Tell us more if you have more.

My biggest pet peeve in general is when people ask for advice but don't take it.

>Mom always makes hateful comments in the car when she sees people jogging
>"I can't wait to lose weight"
>"All my meals are home made!"
>Meals are mac n' cheese, cheesy spaghetti, cheesy everything
>"Your brother eats everything I cook and he's not fat!"
>Bro bikes up mountains and shit every day, is almost never inside because he's out being active all the time
>mfw

I did a pdf document with all the info about diets and fitness knowledge so when someone asks me for the umpteenth time how to get in shape I just send it.
Then they told me they've read it but when I ask about something pass the 3rd page they admit not having read it.
Happens every month with the same people.
>Cant sit and read a 10 page document
>Want gains

I made*
sorry

>Mfw you have no face

that fucking pic...

>Parents ring and ask for diet and exercise advice
>Mum looks physically alright but is probably not healthy
>Dad is overweight and diabetic
>Give them a routine
>Give them diet advice
>My little brother has the gym of a god set up in their garage.
>I ring him and tell him exactly what to show them
>He goes through everything with them
>They do it for one week then stop
>mfw
I'm honestly worried for their health. But I live like 5 hours away and can't force much on them from here.

>vegetable straws

Mom?

>37213593
>spend 30 min talking with him about diet
Oh you're "that guy".

Ten pages is too much. The sticky is the perfect intro. Just send that.

Hi honey :)

I don't know if it's unique to USA how stupid the people in your lives are...
Whenever anybody asks me about fitness and I explain calories in/calories out and the different kinds of weight training they all understand and acknowledge it pretty well, and mostly just say they wished they cared more to do it. Very few make excuses, and fewer still get on with stupid bullshit.

Sarcasm?

Regardless it's just more of the same. He constantly shits on bodybuilders but drools over the crossfit games.

He's constantly talking shit about all these athletes that are on roids but when I bring up his gods and goddesses of Crossfit he's all
>no way man they get tested after every event

I'm not sure what pisses me off more, the condescending bullshit he spews about crossfit vs the things I do or how he's constantly wining about food and his "belly" while simultaneously eating at Bojangles and Panda Express every day.

post link plz?

>The sticky involves SS
DROPPED

can i hav dis

i'll be okay since i have no coworkers , job or friends

Luckily everyone (Three people including me lol) downstairs at my job are all relatively fit. Upstairs, though, lies a hilarious fat black heifer.

>"Why don't you three ever gain weight? You're eating as much as me!"
>Well, we eat mainly just high protien food and watch our calorie intake and te-
"I DO THAT TOO!"
>Proceeds to eat AN ENTIRE BOX of trail mix as snack
>Proceeds to eat half of a Papa John's pizza at lunch
>Proceeds to eat leftover barbecue (Southern, so our barbecue is basically meat drowning in liquid brown sugar) for "dinner"
>She leaves her station at 4pm
>"I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I CAN'T LOSE WEIGHT!"

You must be fun to work and have office banter with.

You'll find that giving people advice on any topic, including fitness, is usually a fairly fruitless effort. Most people take a long time to change their habits and it's rare you'll see someone change soon after giving them advice. Give advice if you feel inclined but do it without attachment. Giving advice is at least an opportunity to affirm your beliefs, so enjoy it for that.

>people ask for advice
>give it
>Lel you guys would suck to work with.

wot?

Can you post a link m8

Sounds like my dad mang. Went from relatively average to 190lbs+ overweight in about six years and doesn't see the problems its causing. Severe sleep apnea, getting winded from normal tasks, not being able to ride his motorcycle regularly... It makes me sad and I can't get him to start dieting and exercising. I don't want to lose my dad :C

Stop bitching about them behind their back and talking about fitness all the time with your coworkers. Don't be "that guy".

>have fatass coworker always spouting how strong he is.
>constantly over compensating by over tightening everything at work
>always tries to make fun of my salads or home cooked meals
>"That's rabbit food user!"
>drinks 4+ sodas every god damn day
>spends no less than 30 minutes in the bathroom every day
>I just need to piss from drinking water
>smells like death every time he leaves

I don't want to feel these feels

>giving people fitness advice
>caring if they make it or not

Who cares. Most people are weak-willed morons with no self-awareness. Stop wasting your mental energy on these cretins.

No. He asked. He wanted help.

Also fuck you.

Bitching behind their back? As in don't talk about it on Veeky Forums? kek fuck off dude. I'll talk about fitness to whoever I want. Plus he was the one who brought it up you fag

DYEL brah? Did a big fit alpha try to convince you to work out?

Fat ass detected

Also, what part of him constantly bringing up crossfit and then asking me about my diet do you not understand? I don't go out of my way to talk to him about it.

And even if I did
>talking about your hobbies with coworkers
>OMG DON'T BE "THAT GUY"

kys

Stupid people always want quick solutions for complex problems. As soon as they skip your advise and ask what the quickest way is to lose 100lbs, you know exactly they'll never make it.

These are the people who will listen to your stories and selectively pick the information that suits them best. As soon as you recognize this behaviour, cut off your help.

I've given up talking about fitness at work.

Everyone is a fucking expert here but are fat as fuck.

They always ask me what I do to stay in shape. In the beginning I shared that knowledge but just gave up because they don't use it and continue to eat like shit for the rest of the day. One bitch makes kale smoothies in the morning and then proceeds to eat pizza and wings for lunch. I gave up trying to tell them anything.

When they ask what I'm eating. I say
>"you know that crazy healthy stuff. I don't even know why I eat it anymore."


One time i brought my fish oil into work one day. I was running late and was going to pop them in when i settled down.

>omg user what are you taking?!
>"It's fish oil high in omega 3s"
>That's silly to take. Vitamins are worthless

At least you were a good influence on your little bro. He sounds like hes making it

>visiting with some family last mother's day
>aunt is 4'11 200+
>notes that i've lost a lot of weight (just finished dat dere cut)
>asks me what my diet was (as if to imply i was on some gimmick fad diet like adkins)
>"just eat less"
>she laughs in disbelief
>nah i'm serious i just eat less
>she pauses for a second
>"b-but that's hard..."

watching firsthand her inner hamster come to terms with it's predicament, and suddenly realizing she just lacks the willpower to change was something else

Thats funny and terrible.

>Dad isn't fat anymore but diabetic and had to have a toe amputated. Told by drs at hospital that he really needs to get his betus under control
>Mom is fat and cooks him general fatty Mexican diet
>The only real change in his diet is buying while wheat bullshit and cutting out Coke
>Constantly calls to ask about sugar content in certain foods but gets mad when I tell him that what he really needs is to set up an appointment with a registered dietician to set up a plan for managing his total carbs, not just sugar
>Has done nothing in terms of exercise, tried to get him to do some wheelchair workouts I did last year when I couldn't walk for two months.
>Didn't have to take meds for his betus for a month. Thanks to his slacking off, he tells me he has to start taking them again.
>Blames doctor

pls post it... i think the sticky isn't quite enough

This. I always remember this phrase from The Three Musketeers:

>"People, in general," he said, "only ask advice not to follow it; or if they do follow it, it is for the sake of having someone to blame for having given it."

Wait until you get a bigboy job kiddos.