no friends

Take ballet/dance class for adults. You will be around women constantly and will be put out of your comfort zone. It's what I'm going to do if I'm in your situation but at 25 instead.

You're never gonna get a girlfriend if you don't even have friends. Work on one problem before the other. Maybe once you have friends the tfwnogf won't seem so bad. Just find non normie friends at a place that you enjoy. Get some lifting friends or gaming friends. At some point you're gonna have to get out of your comfort zone and talk to someone.

if you want to get a woman, you could try going to yoga classes. Its hard but you will most likely be one of the only men there and you can meet some qts

Op is fucked. There are no clubs and hobbies for people in their late 20s. At that age you are expected to be working and married or already have friends. Everyone who isn't a loser like us has no time for petty sovial shit with strangers; it's borderline creepy to not be living your life for the sake of a child, wife, and house.

This sounds cheesy as hell but do this.

Yeah right. The average age that people marry keeps rising. He's fine at 29 and once you hit 40 you have a whole new demographic to date.

Loneliness is not the issue. You need to define yourself, through hobbies, opinions and habits. Your life seems rather empty right now. Isn't there anything you want to do? Become better at? Learn more about?
Get a hobby, start getting invested in something. I mean if as person asked you, "Who are you? What do you like?" What would you answer? Your answers define who you are.

this. OP is 29. life is over at 29. good job fucking up your life, OP.

Disagree, work can be a real help with this. I work for a defense contractor and threes people aging from 22 to 40 in the company athletic club married single gay probably even trannies.

i've tried rock climbing, went for 2 months and didn't talk to anyone there

>just ask them if they wanna grab a few people and go to happy hour.
why would they want to get a drink with me? i didn't mention this, i am socially retarded. i always have awkward conversations, and i can't think of a time that a conversation has lasted more than 60 seconds

>why would they want to get a drink with me?
Because youre presenting yourself as someone who cares. Normies pick up on these things.

>went for 2 months and didn't talk to anyone there

you know where you fucked up then. next time you try socialise, try 2g of phenibut in the morning to ease anxniety

thanks for the advice

i do lift
i went to a therapist once. she didn't have too much advice. mainly she gave me some CBT resources and told me to "try" to talk more and be the one to initiate things with coworkers. and she told me to elaborate more, as i usually give 1 word answers to things

>-stop negative self talk
i'm a loser, and i know it. i can't just stop thinking that

>and i can't think of a time that a conversation has lasted more than 60 seconds

just ask them about their interests and shit

you don't need social skills when there's drinks dude
that's what alcohol is for
like this is going to sound hard but others don't think nearly as much about the things as you do
if you fuck up - no one will remember
if you say something weird - no one will fucking care

like all these things you think people assume and think about you don't actually happen
it's all in your mind and your mind alone
maybe they'll remember you as the shy one - who the fuck cares?
even more probs to you when you break out of your shell for the first time

Therapy is an ongoing process that requires forming a relationship with your therapist, not just going once. If you think "try to talk more" is shit advice, tell them that and ask for more practical ways of doing things. You get out what you put in.

> 3/10 manlet
It's true that less attractive people find it hard. Are you seriously a 3/10?
Is there something you can do to bump that up to a 5, without large expense?

Once you bump yourself to average looking you can then do the rest.

i think i will try this in august, along with trying rock climbing again

in hopes of being more of a normie, i'm going on vacation (solo), my first time leaving the country in 20 years
don't want to start new memberships if i'm going to be away for a few weeks

>You're never gonna get a girlfriend if you don't even have friends.
i know this, but i don't know how to get friends
>at a place that you enjoy
i literally spend all my time, when not at work, at home in front of a computer, or in my homegym

i can try this.. but i can do yoga at home too i think. yoga membershps are stupidly expensive, as much as gym membershps often

start doing game, despite being a faggot.
youtube.com/watch?v=CcrhwatDkUM

>no friends
>considered good looking
Sure buddy

>"Who are you? What do you like?" What would you answer?
i don't know how to answer this. people have asked me what my passions were, and i couldn't even answer. i'm not into anything really

i don't think people at work really like me that much
we have skype at work, and no one ever messages me, except to ask work related questions

How do you expect them to start liking you then? lol

Spots is pretty easy to get into. Not going to games, just watching.

I actually got heavily into sports when I was at my loneliest. It was comfy to watch and I had something to talk about if i ever needed to .

i don't know where to get any kind of medication for anxiety

i don't know what questions to ask
a recent example of a conversation with a coworker
>what are you doing this weekend
>me: just relaxing, how about you?
>i'm going to golf this weekend
>me: *pause* d-do you go golfing often?
i am actually socially retarded

but how do i break out of my shell
i've been in my shell my whole life

>work
why aren't you friends with people at work?

My co-workers are pretty tight together, they go out at least once a week to do some stupid shit that costs usually nothing like squatting in someones house and watching a movie and making some gay ass food. They always invite me and I never go, they're a bunch of cunts. But you seem lonely enough.

>3/10
you can probably improve it mate
you do use deodorant right?

>no interests
you're clearly on Veeky Forums, you're into fitness to some degree. Your excuses are bullshit. Just be urself.

If you don't pause or stutter, that conversation really isn't autistic at all. You are putting the attention back to them and asking them a relevant question. Maybe you could have better phrased it but it's really not bad and you are just picking on yourself and creating a self fulfilling prophecy.

What's wrong with asking if they golf often . It's a legitimate question

How do you have a job and no life, but still be broke?

d i s

>tfw she's texting CHAD to ask if he wants to FUCK her ASSHOLE and then share a PIZZA

the therapist was kind of expensive too, i spent almost $2k to talk to someone
she even often mentioned that it was her doing most of the talking too

i've seen that video and a lot of his other videos. i've read PUA books and stuff like No More Mr. Nice Guy and Models. i can speak from a script i think, but i don't know what to actually say after an opening line

i'm still autistic and friendless. someone on Veeky Forums recommended "Mate", recently released
the author repeatedly says in the book, "if you have no friends, or have asperger's you're screwed". i don't know why someone on Veeky Forums recommended it

>but how do i break out of my shell
>i've been in my shell my whole life
try laughing dude
laughing with others is like hammers breaking your shell

>i'm going to golf this weekend
"Where are you going?" and "Going with anyone?" are things you can ask without even knowing what golf is. More specific follow-ups might be, "Are you any good? What's your handicap?" "Have you been there before? Is it a good course?"

Show some interest in their hobby. Normies love talking about themselves and won't even notice you aren't saying much.

YOU HAVE A JOB.
That means you have income, therefore spend it on things to improve yourself like clubs (swimming, dancing, film, anything and you will meet folks).

Besides doing the above, save some cash for if you lose your job.

Rock climbing can be a good way to meet people. Especially if you are bouldering. Just talk to people who are working on similar problems to you. When you get moderately good v5+ people will start talking to you if they see you do some cool moves.

Also don't worry about being normie. Going to bars and shit is boring as hell and a waste of money. Find things you like to do that make you happy. Everyone is attracted to people that are passionate about something positive and productive.

No one wants to be around a gloomy gus who sits in front of the computer all day. As you start becoming happier and more fulfilled other people will notice and want to be around you.

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>escape room
wat

OP serious advice here. Embrace solitude. If you can't be happy with yourself there's no chance of socializing normally anyway. I decided to embrace solitude and have been practically alone and happy for several years now. I used to be like you, overhearing people talking about their lives, but I always focused on the fun stuff they discussed. Since I've learned to be happy alone, I now recognize all the useless crap they bitch about that I don't ever deal with — lying friends, games, manipulation, gossip, etc. I'm happy by myself and don't ever deal with any of that shit at all.

watch elliott hulse, learn from all the robot questions about life he answered
also learn to breath into your balls, because why not

your coworkers are probably uncomfortable with you and would be happy if you started being more social.

Escape rooms are fun as fuck. Basically locked in a room and have to escape (kek). You use clues and items in the room to break out with your team. It's a great team building and friendship building excercise

Worst advice ever. Fuck outta here autist

Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman

3/4 of it is the scientific study of the pros and cons of optimism and pessimism.
The solution he provides at the end of it will look underwhelming, but that's because there's no panacea for this shit.

duniahartanto.files.wordpress.com/2014/10/ebooksclub-org__learned_optimism__how_to_change_your_mind_and_your_life.pdf

>why aren't you friends with people at work?
my work is project based. people are on different teams. so i don't work with most other coworkers, so don't talk to them
but even the people in the projects i am on, aren't friends with me, but they are friends with each other.

maybe i'm just unlikeable

>deodorant
i use fragrances

the guy said "yeah, when i can"
and that was the end of the conversation

i'm not broke, i just have average income and everything just seems expensive.
i live at home too still (so save like $1k/mo in rent). all my money just goes into my bank account.
it's not enough to spend on things.. i don't know how my coworkers do it, i think a lot have assistance from parents

i don't like the sound of my laugh or my voice
i rarely laugh in public.. i just autistically smile whenever people say funny things

you have literally nothing to lose
move to a new city/country and just do whatever it takes to make new friends, its all in your head

Wtf. What are you pissing your money away on? If you live at home still, 90% of your income should still be with you.

Join a crossfit.

Seriously This year I had to switch gyms so I started training at crossfit box alone.

Then I decided to try it. Just find a good box, mine has coaches who are legit, not the youtube shit you see.

Whats pretty neat that trainings are always in group. Made a lot of friends who i hang out outside the box, also whats great that there are alot of girls.

>if you have no friends, or have asperger's you're screwed
that's how it is. especially at your age.

here's what you can do:
- stop being a 3/10 manlet. are you really 3/10? 3/10 is like ... deformed-face-tier. how's your beard? no growth at all? get some minoxidil, stuff works. also get a nice haircut.
- you said you lift. do you look like you lift? if no, lift harder. are you fat? cut down.
- find a friend. inb4 yeah i tried that. where are you from? every single city has one of those 'Spotted'-pages on facebook. people getting their shit posted when they made eye contact with a girl in public and other stuff. message them and get your 'contact ad' on their facebook wall.
>29yo trainwreck with no friends and social anxiety trying to break out of his cage. do have a steady job. i like to lift in my spare time. looking for someone to do fun stuff, go out, have a drink, basically learn how to interact with people. yes, i'm that awkward. but i wanna change!
worst case: nobody's gonna respond. well, it was worth a shot.
best case: you'll find someone who's in the exact same spot as you. bravo! meet up with him (or maybe even her?!) and get to know each other. no idea what to talk about or keep fucking up conversation? who the fuck cares, you're here to try and the person you're talking to knows exactly that. he won't mind. like you said in your ad: you wanna change. and change takes time.
pic unrelated

I need some advice please guys and I don't know where else to post it, Inb4 /adv/

>Not autistic, many freinds
>fit and decent facial aesthetics
>my problems are when it comes to females
>if I end up near a crush I get these huge amounts of anxiety like borderline panic
>even though we aren't talking or anything I'm spilling spaghetti left right and centre

Any advice would be hugely appreciated

if you have many friends and a decent job, then go clubbing just to meet folks, your hang ups will dissolve.

thanks, those are good questions, but i wouldn't have thought of them

true, i am saving cash. my bosses all know i'm autistic and many don't like that for the work i'm in, as we speak to clients

i am trying to find ways to spend my money too

thanks
i want to get good at rock climbing. i only do indoor bouldering right now (as mentioned several times already, i have no friends). i think it would be cool to do actual outdoor trad or sport climbing

it's where you're in a room and have to solve puzzles with a group to "escape".
last year it was very popular and all my normie coworkers talked about for a few months

will look into it

after college i was a neet for almost two years because i couldn't get a job. i have no network to get me a job and i am terrible at interviews
i have my job to lose. i am very afraid of losing it tbqh