Fuck these sob stories

im a manlet but i want to bully a cute lanklet dude and have gay sex with him

>walking down the street
>see babes on other side fucking MIRING
>walk out into traffic, signalling cars to stop and let me pass
>approach them
>they are literally gushing at this point
>Tell them I came to tell them I'm not interested in them

ALPHALPHA AS FUCK

fat dyel "powerlifter" detected

>out riding in bros car with bro
>on my way to meet a girl he's been talking with
>bros girl has a friend
>start talking with her in the car while bro and his girl sits in awkward silence
>find out shes into cars
>tell her about my bmw e34 540
>she says she doesnt like bmw's cus the majority of people that drive bmw's have no clue about cars other than that the brand bmw is cool
>tell her that she would dig bmw's after spending under 1 minute in my car
>she accepts
>tell her to put her number in my phone
>bro and i drop off bros girl and "my girl"
>go home and get my car, 320+hp with a loud v8
>later into the night i call the girl
>tell her to go outside and ill pick her up
>her house is next to a long straight road
>as soon as she closes the door i put the pedal to the floor and she get pressed down in the seat from the g forces
>giggles uncontrollable and says she totally dig bmw's now

fucked her the same night

A girl once begged me to go outside and hook up with her. She then asked me to let her give me head. Didnt catch any STDS, so i'd call it a good CHAD ALPHA COCK HARD BIG DICK moment

>tripping balls at a party
>everyones wearing hula skirts
>i'm one of two guys with no shirt on
>big outside concrete patio
>one of the stoners has coloring chalk
>we all sit around coloring awesome pictures
>stand up turn around and see scrawny stoner girl I like
>walk straight up to her and tell her
>You're a fox, a stone cold fox and I want you
>she leans up and playfully bites my ear and whispers wait till later
>she hands me a beer
>go back to tripping out
>party dies down
>chilling out on living floor
>she comes over with blanket and lays right beside me and covers us both up
>everyone starts passing out watching adult swim
>we start banging right in the middle of all these people
>apparently told at some point there is a spare room by one of the people beside us who wakes up
>both of us naked go to the back and bang all night long
>fastforward next afternoon when we finally wake up
>realize i have no clothes
>wrap myself in bed sheet and walk outside to greet everyone
>everyones chilling out drinking, turn to me and the AYYYYYYs start.
>grab a beer and head back in where we fuck the rest of the afternoon.

I had to buy those guys a new bedsheet for their couch bed, but our romp became a in circle joke. We ended up hooking up on and off for a few weeks banging none stop at various parties before we both lost interest.

>I used to be a druggie so I had mad confidence.
What?

>senior
>sophomore chick picks me up to hang out
>we spend the day talking about politics, religion, and how fucked the world is
>she is force fed the red pill
>convince her that pre marital sex is wrong
>spends the rest of her years a shy and coy virgin college student

lol

I basically used to be drunk and or high all the time, I got through grade 11 and 12 with a vodka energy drink as my breakfast almost every morning I could afford it.
I didn't give a single fuck about anything, I actually wanted to die.
I guess that shit was attractive to girls, because I had alot more luck with girls back then, and not just the outwardly trashy ones.

It was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Jessica. She is really damn hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Jessica called me and said she wanted me to **** her. So be it.

I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferrari?s have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my dick. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my dick. Booya.

Flash forward 10 minutes later. My 30 inch dick is going inside of her VAGINA, hitting them walls. I?m holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I?m ****ing her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says ?harder.? V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my dick. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn?t disagree with them.

I throw her a towel so she can clean herself up then I do a triple backflip into my Maserati and drive home

>I actually wanted to die.
people like this are the absolute worst. If you had wanted to die, you would be dead. You're just an angsty little shit

Woaaaaaaaaaaaah

Wait you said your car was a Lamborghini? Is this a true story or not?

ok

Only true oldfags will get this ;)

very VERY angered snake gets denied

This is so fucking old and cringe, thank you. Haven't seen this in years.

didn't think i'd see this again

>What is survival instinct

I did this with a beautiful high test half black woman. Was lots of fun but god damn do I have mixed feelings about it, makes me nervous to ever get married

>An Athlete Wrestling with a Python.

Sculpted by Frederic Leighton. Very prominent artist.

Truly depressed people say "I don't want to be ME anymore". It's not a suicide fetish, the death part is not alluring, it's just the pain of dealing with yourself and the abuse your own brain does to itself every single day.

This is true. Shame is a lot more extreme than simply wanting to be dead imo.

>rudolph tegner

...

Top snek

...

>recruited for internship
>formal dinner with fellow new hirees and current employees
>have a one-on-one conversation with the boss
>meet his daughter
>she's hot
>after dinner have drinks with the girl
>she's flirty and into me
>I get my benis into her bagina that night
>as a bonus, my boss really liked me and gave me a promotion

And that's how I landed my first job after college.

> last week
> get dumped out of the blue by gf of a year and a half because she couldn't handle me being stressed by school
>go into overdrive mode
> get off my ass and start doing boxing
> deal with my school issues, get on top of my work
> build a table with my carpenter bro
> get on tinder
> hit it off with three different girls the first day, have dates with each of them this week
> still feel some pretty intense feelz from my ex, but life is getting better by the hour

to quote Tom Platz, personal growth comes from being uncomfortable

What the fuk man this post gave me feels. This was my first copypasta found in 6th grade googling how to do a triple backflip

>several years ago
>just finished undergrad
>all friends but one moved away, I'm waiting out the end of my lease
>qt vegan hippie girl I've flirted with is the only person i know left in town
>meet up with her at the bar, she starts gettin touchy feely
>walk back to hers, parked my bike there
>legit spend 20 minutes of her practically begging me to come upstairs
>don't even remember why I said no
>hop on bike and pedal into the night
>get home and drink myself to sleep
We actually ended up dating for a while, but I was a dysfunctional wreck at the time and it fell apart. Despite the fact that she had wicked chest acne and didn't shave her legs and armpits, the sweaty summer sex we had in her un-air-conditioned apartment was the best I ever had. Dunno if I could have ever been madly in love with her, but she remains the sexiest person I've ever been with, close to a decade later.

>23 yo, phisically disabled kv
>meet girl at party, shit is going well
>shes drunk im drunk, she gets emotional while we talk
>take my chance, kiss and finger in panties
>she's wet already (hot but weird? no idea how girls work)
>make out, get to the bathroom, fuck. Had a condom on me thank god
>wait why is my hand all red? Shit shes on her period
>I made her suck on my fingers after fingering her, so with period blood on them lmao
>white t-shirt red all over, go back to room with all my friends afterwards and kiss/cuddle her

That was a savage night. She hated me afterwards, but worth tho. There are more details that'd make this story even weirder.

I hope you're not paying for those dates?

>gf of 6 years leaves me
>depressed for months
>only made out with some bitches and did some hand/mouth stuff because of depression
>see ex gf
>we have a heart to heart talk
>she starts to cry
>tells me shes found someone else
>she's slept with him (I took her virginity, this was the first guy other than me she fucked)
>pretend I don't care
>livid inside
>that night go out
>fuck a bitch in backseat of my car
>drop her off
>go back out
>fuck some other bitch at her house
>wake up in morning feeling much better
>still depressed, but better

Holy shit it's been a while since I've seen this one

Went back home for summer and been fucking 3 girls on the regular. This text was after I fucked one of them in the backseat of my car. She got a little obsessed after I made her cum the first time we ever hooked up but she means well. Got one more from another chick who I actually met in high school but didn't fuck till college.

Second girl. Chick is a freak who gave me road head for the first time in my life.

Good dick makes these girls go crazy.

I suppose I'll continue.
>Walk into local bar/club one night
>just kind of doing laps, saying hi to people I know etc.
>not really feeling the crowd
>go to dance floor
>girl I work with jumps on me and wraps legs around me
>she's got a FAT fucking ass
>holding her ass
>she immediately starts making out with me
>weird because I barely talk to her at work
>go out for a smoke
>come back in and start grinding with her while making out
>she's slamming her ass into me, look up
>some guys are all buttblasted grilling me
>I lean in and ask her who the fuck they are
>she says its her friends
>start fingering her on dance floor
>bitch is going Atlanta stripper style crazy with the moves
>She starts jerking me while we dance to a slower song
>guys are still grilling
>at this point I'm just annoyed by them
>pull her head back, bite her neck while looking at them, shes still jerking me
>I'm rock hard knowing one of these dudes (btw all of them "powerlifter functional strength looking motherfuckers") is her date, and I spot him
>She eventually wants me to bust right there
>starts saying dirty shit to me
>cups her hand and tells me to do it
>cum gallons into her cupped hand
>she pulls it out and swallows my cum right there
>dark so only people who see are me, and the dudes shes with
>keeps shoving her fingers into her mouth licking cum
>I leave
>next day at work she pretends it didn't happen
>fuck her the next night

I used to work in a grocery store stocking shelves and one day a milf kept following me around eventually she came up to me and told me how her husband was out of town and she needed some "comfort". That evening I went to her house and she answered the door naked, we fucked right on the porch. It was great fun but I think it insures I'll never marry.

The first woman I ever fucked was a married woman. I was 16/17 she was 26. I thought after that I had found love with another girl (im the 6 year relationship guy in this thread), but they all turn out the same. Just stupid fucking whores. I love women, love to be near them, talk to them, sleep with them obviously, but it doesn't change the fact I don't trust them for shit

of course not, it's CURRENT YEAR, shitlord

The only women who like/are impressed by cars look like guys.

You effectively banged a tranny dude.

>1st year of Uni
>5'7"
>117lbs thank you skeleton mode
>Sad
>Confused
>No friends
>Bad breakup
>No hobbies
>1st year after graduating
>5'11"
>170lbs 13% bf
>Best rock climber in my city
>Awesome at calisthenics
>Engaged to qtp2t
>Amazing friends

"I remember the days I used to pray for everything I have now"

it's me wrestling with my dick, aka, tryna not do it for the hoes.

>fucks chick at her dorm room
>she smokes me up
>on my way back to my dorm my ex texts me to come over my place
>kills two pussies in one day
>feelsgoodman.jpeg

I've only been rejected so far and have only had sex with escorts. Hitting 30 this year.

For the last two months I've been working out every morning either my PPL routine or cardio on rest days. I finally got my nutrition right and routine right. I used to try on/off to workout but kept getting injured.

I just want to keep improving so I can leave humanity behind.

>love my job/business, own house, go on trips

nice work of fiction m8

almost the same stats here

>go first year party
>go with some bros and hoes
>they all get couples and dance
>stay alone
>fuck this shit I won't be a faggot this time
>"be confident, stay out confort zone"
>enter group of 5 grills dancing
>wanna dance bitch
>3 laugh, 1 wasted as fuck
>the last one, who happened to be the qtst one smiles and dances with me
>after 15 minutes
>user wanna go somewhere else?

why the fuck you want gf when you can get unlimited pussy if you want

its really not though. Just because your life is whack doesn't mean everyone Else's is.

at least my ex of 6 years isn't fucking some dude right now

That;s what happens when people break up. At least I have an ex, as opposed to you having no one. I'm getting by just fine thanks for your concern though

> Be me, be 30
> Pick up much younger chick.
> She's 23. Blonde qt3.14 with great ass
> Skinny but fit
> Sucks dick like it's her job
> Seriously, best bj ever
> Super tight pussy. Cums like a banshee
> I mostly have my shit together
> Her life is a wreck, but getting better
> Not LTR material
> Still use each other as booty call

chads of Veeky Forums I call to you. I NEED to figure out how to be more confident in the sense of not caring about anything but myself. I KNOW I can get girls by doing this because when for random reasons I'm in that zone of not caring, I can feel girls like magnets on me and have hooked up/fucked girls from this but I can't figure out how to be like this all the time, it comes randomly

But I just don't understand how to not care. for example, if there is a beautiful girl in the room I cant help but look at her and feel like if I don't I am ruining a chance or something even though it's usually not the case.

I am 21 and transferring to university in August to finish my 2 years. It's a party school and I want to have the most fun possible, I already am getting the body part down. I really feel like this is gonna be the best 2 years of my current life and I don't want to waste opportunities. Any advice or suggestions?

>implying im single
tip top kek

did you see the cum in her mouth when you saw her last? how does it feel knowing the love of your life is getting loved from behind daily?

I fucked her last week. So I really don't care. I love the old her, the new her is kind of shitty. Like I said I'm doing just fine. I'm certain your either single, or being cheated on if you do happen to be in a relationship for your obvious lack of chill.

I could see that happening in like a low class black club.

Its mostly frequented by the white college students in town. (me having been one of them when this shit happened). This girl is particular is columbian/puertorican/irish.

keep it up good boy, your faceless insults do nothing to me since you know nothing about me obviously.
>cucked out of a 6 year relationship
>still go and fuck the sloppy vagina
o i am laffin
>kind of slutty
every virgin outside of their first relationship is slutty not even memeing
>coworker runs up and jumps on him even though its dark
>coworker makes no attempt to talk to the OP
smells fishy

you need to experience ego death pretty badly bud. It's not about caring about yourself only, it's about realizing how little you matter

RSD brother.
Then just go out and practice.
One of the best warm ups is to approach, and intentionally bomb. Intentionally piss her off. That help you understand how simple it is to man-ipulate the avg. female.

I don't see how I was cucked exactly. She left me, started dating someone else. Pretty straight forward. I've been fucking her on the side ever since. If anyone is being cucked its bitch boy whos with her now. I don't give a fuck what shes up to. She calls once a week to get dicked by me, she swallows my cum once a week, I shove it in her ass and degrade her once a week. Like I said, she was the lvoe of my life, now she someone I used to love, but don't ever want to be with again.
Anyways I can obviously tell youre just a bitch boy like her new bf, So enjoy the taste of jizz of many men like me when you kiss your sweet little princess at night

I get pussy, and could cheat all day if I wanted-but I really want to raise a family and continue the dynasty.

Brah, I feel you
>Business college fag
>GPA at 2.8
>needed to pull As this semester or bust from Accountancy program
>devoted time to classes
>gf: user, I feel detached from you
>bitch I'm studying for my future
We had a nice talk about priorities. Relationships are difficult, but if you can put effort in your school work, you can put effort in your relationship.

Understand that most people don't give a fuck about you. They don't give you a second thought, even if you talk to them. So, looking at life with that mentality, what could happen? Worst case, you talk to that woman and she isn't interested. Oh no, too bad, move on with your night. Or you talk to her and she realizes your the hottest guy in the room and you give her the best dicking of her life.

alright bud whatever you tell yourself

Not necessarily the best I have, but the most fun
>2 years ago, #ladsontour
>pull a girl at the same hotel, go back to her room
>smash, no sign of her roommate
>go back up to my room about 3 floors up
>turns out my m8 was shagging her roommate in our room at the same time
>high 5, smoke a joint on the balcony
Made up for the previous night when I'd taken a girl back to my room only to find my other mate had already got back and chundered and passed out on my bed
the cunt

>1 am
>hear sounds coming from my front lawn
>see kinda buff dude making out with 8/10
>open window, tell him to get lost
>gives me the finger
>ohellno.jpg
>go downstair into the front lawn
>ask them to leave while locking the gate
>'are you serious, you fucking idiot'
>tell the girl she's beyond ugly
>go back inside and here wannabe chad go 'say that again you bitch'
>psychomode activate
>open gate and tell dude to come into lawn again
>his toes just cross the gate when I hook him with a right
>girl goes crazy and pushes me, push her to the ground
>boy tries to come back at me, again hit him with a right
>mfw he falls down
>while on the ground starts to apologize about how he never wanted trouble
>girl picks him up and tells him they are leaving
>girl looks back 3 times

Don't know if I'm a complete douchebag for it, but the guy's ego was completly shattered and it was crazy to see how the girls attraction to him litteraly melted like snow for the sun.

I definitely crave validation from others, even if I don't show it. I try to not look stupid in front of others but I bet that in return can make me unattractive or unappealing to people

It's not like I don't go out and having experienced many social settings; I do all the time. I just don't know how to go the extra mile and have that zyzz/chad affect on people that draws them in like magnets

my life is a mess have nothing to brag about
but hey atleast im fit haaaaaaa.....

>match with girl on tinder
>find her ig
>tons of pics of her and her bf
>when I bring it up she says, "he cheated on me so idc"
>offer to help her get revenge
>fuck her the next day

topkek

>making out with sloot at 1 AM
>not resting to repair his muscles
>tries to steal your gains by waking you up at 1AM
>disregard for others
He brought this upon himself

>Be at house party
>drunk, i'm pretty shy otherwise
>start to talk with this girl on the couch
>suddently super beta faggot appears
>says to the girl "what are you doing? You should do this "
>i'm like the fuck do you want but say nothing
>keep chatting and playfully teasing the girl
>the faggot takes a chair and stays there showering the girl with compliment and shit
>it's not preatty clear he's her beta orbiter and is desperate to get her away from me
>bro comes to the rescue and takes him a way with an excuse
>kiss the girl and go in an empty room
>start undressing her
>as soon as our shirts come of the faggot burts in, watches me in eyes than trows a punch to the wall and storms away
we didnt fuck (i'm not a real Chad) but we all slept there and i heard the guy getting up several times during the night and slamming things around

If you need validation from others that makes your external personality malleable, right? If so, then you probably come off as inauthentic or simply lacking confidence. Women especially notice this, given that they're more socially oriented and manipulative.

As simple as this sounds the best way to achieve Zyzz levels of charisma is to be confident. Personally, I got there by unabashedly embracing myself and not caring what others think. I'm also an interovert by nature, so this was easy. For you, maybe seeking positive influencers and get their approval.

>party at my place
>friend brings gf, who appears with 4 girls
>3 don't cares, and one blueyed brunette
>I literally thought 'and that is the girl who will ignore me...'
>I spaghetti like no other meeting her
>she detects my power level instantly
>suddenly she stays almost the whole night beside me, without saying a word
>we finally go to a club
>I was relaxed by then, she still by my side at the place too
>talk to her, she says she's comfy with me
>I kiss her
I am not particularly pasta with girls, but this one was really impressive for me
>next week I fucked her
Never in my whole life I had this type of experience, were I acknowledge a girl that I believe is unattainable, to end up with her later
Really cool night

Yea no fuckin way

Probably up there in terms of scumbag kinda shit but ever since I broke up with my gf of 3 years, I've just been fucking willy nilly. 4/10, 8/10, doesn't matter. Every week I've gone out, I've gotten my dick wet. That's not what I've been boosting my self esteem with though. It's nice, initially that's all it was. Fucking my way through sadness. But really, fucking women who are in committed relationships. Jesus, I love it.

It's nothing too insidious, I don't stalk these chicks like prey. I meet them, get to know them a little and give the attention they're craving. It's never a constant give either. I'm a former friendzone guy; I know all the signs and avoid them like the plague. I'm not there to listen to their problems at work or in their life. I'm there to make them fantasize about being with someone other than their significant other. I tease them just enough to make them want more and when they take that plunge, I don't have sex with them, i fuck them the way their boyfriends or husbands won't.

He won't eat your ass out? I'll toss that salad like a starving rabbit. I'll hold her down and fuck her in the ass after. It's not a one way street. When they understand that, it becomes a lot less about pleasing her needs, it's about mine too.

Can't lift you up and fuck you against the wall? I've done nothing but hit the gym just so I could. Even fat bitches. But that's a lot more taxing a more multitasking than I care for. I will fuck her bent over the same couch he sits playing video games instead of tending to her needs. Her toes dangling just shy of the floor as I slam my cock into her while she's face first into the cushions

Make her feel wanted, desired and scratch the itch that's been bubbling inside her? I'll slake her thirst like a glass of water and hold her face while I kiss her because you won't.

I consider it a reward, for the time and effort I put into myself. I'm a scumbag but I have no illusions about it.

how much tren were you on

>Manlet
>work outside bundled up as fuck cuz northern Canada
>supervisor
>new hire is 6'2
>hire in winter. Fights authority all the time, doesn't listen to anything I ask him to do
>spring comes around and I start wearing tank top and shorts
>catch him mirin my gainz
>new guy always listens now
>asks for work/personal advice
>still end up firing him cuz shitty worker

>Things that never happened: the post

I fucked Tom Brady then dumped him once I found out that he was the antichrist and an Illuminati puppet, a demon.

He says I broke his heart and I'm only 23 so I guess I'm going places in life.

>freshman year of college
>see my oneitis everywhere
>one night in the dorm she sees me in the hall
>"hey, do you want to hang with me and my friends
>friend and I hang with her and her two girl friends and her beta orbiter
>oneitis starts flirting with me while we play pool
>beta boy challenges me to pool
>"sure, whatever"
>while he focuses on his shots and trying to win I'm spitting game
>her friends love me and she's getting touchy feely
>beat beta 3 times in a row
>"I can do more push ups than you user"
>he starts doing push ups
>friend laughs at him
>he does 50
>oneitis friend says "I bet you can do more user"
>put my feet on the pool table and bang out 60 decline push-ups
>"well putting your feet up makes it easier, less weight"
>he attempts and smashes his face in the ground
>"what was that stud?"
>oneitis giggles and grabs my arm
>we go to my suite and drink
>beta tries to drink more than me
>take my bottle of jack and chug
>beta can't hang, throws up all over our sink
>"c'mon dude! Clean that shit up then get out"
>beta leaves
>oneitis says she's getting sleepy
>"come to my room user"
>go to her room
>drunk fuck her
>pass out
>wake up and realize the bed is wet
>wow it must have been hot
>realize the room is cold
>what's that smell?
>fuck it's piss!
>I pissed the bed
>she's still asleep
>gotta think fast
>see water bottle by the bed
>grab water bottle and squeeze it on her groin
>quickly hide water bottle
>start yelling "wtf! You pissed! You peed the fucking bed!"
>she wakes up confused
>"you peed the damn bed!"
>she is horrified and visibly shaken
>grab my things and just leave as she keeps apologizing
She never talked to me again, she always got embarrassed when she'd see me after that. Felt a little bad, but it was either her or me

how the fuck did you grew in uni wtf this is bait

Some people grow into their mid 20's

That's how it was before people started taking in massive amounts of exogenous hormones.

A great example of this is from chickens. They hit puberty earlier, but end up shorter if allowed to grow to their full potential (they are harvested early for a better roi), but you get the point.

It's fairly common in demographics with access to more organic food

>a piece of history, being shared with a new generation

Congratulations, newfags, you're now marginally less new for having read such a relic.

>be me, at friends party
>he was always into this one chick, apparently they went on a date a week before or something
>start talking to her, seems pretty nice. 8/10
>get into hot tub but wear t shirt coz bulkan
>complains about me wearing the shirt, get bored and say im going for a shower
>about to get in shower, look behind and she's right there
>we both go in
>worst bj ever
>friend found out shortly after. the tremble in his voice and the look on his face when he told me he didn't care....

>A bro in friendzone for 4 years with cute girl with stunning body. Spaghettied constantly and never smashed.
>Thinks is in love. Says how she is a sweet innocent girl who teaches disabled kids and stuff
>Meet her randomly one night when out as a group. Think nothing of it
>She gets my number off a mutual friend and contacts me asking me out
>Smash it on the first date. Turns out she is total dirty freak sloot. Constantly wants dick, loves rough sex, & has a mouth like sailor, screams she's my whore when getting dicked etc. Fuck her brains out repeatedly for weeks making her gush everywhere etc
>Bro finds out about it cries like a little bitch. Kek.