Gravy Edition

not as bad as most people think, but its still not the best thing to be eating every day

Calorie-wise, not really. But drinking it out of a fucking bowl like a damn dirty ape is the real crime here.

Posting this classic from /v/FPH:

>A little background: My best friend is a nurse, and this experience turned her into a shitlord. She used to be a sympathizer, but after this experience she saw the light.

>So a hugeee lady comes in the hospital complaining of inflammation of her nether regions, and how she's having problems peeing. The gyno is called in for her expertise because the ham seems to be in a ton of pain. The beast had to be at least 400lb and about 5'5" and her husband was about half her weight and only an inch taller. As the doctor is asking questions, it's revealed that this lady has been trying to conceive a child for quite some time (they're both about mid twenties). So this lady has a huge fupa and the gyno couldn't lift it up without some help, so my best friend lifts up this huge amount of fat just so the gyno can look at this ham's vag. When the nurse lifts the flab, there's a huge blue-green flaky line horizontally across her body underneath her fupa.

>The gyno is freaking out, she's never seen this type of mold on a human before and she's worried that it's causing the hambeast's pain. She's inspecting it and finds that it flakes right off the skin. She asks the ham about it and the ham explains it's from the broom. Wait...what? The ham explains that her husband can't reach her vagina to conceive a child, so the husband's mother takes a broom, shoves it under the ham's fupa and lifts it up so the husband can penetrate her. So the husband's mother has been doing this so often with the blue green broom, that the paint has started to chip away and stick to the ham's skin.

>Can we let that sink in for a moment? This woman is so fat, her husband's mother has to help them have sex...with a broom!!!!

>Needless to say, after that my friend lost all respect for humongous people.

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Is she vaping?

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And this happened to me personally:
>Be 18
>At college
>Gf has hamplanet roommate
>Fatty McQuadstacker has a bf
>Likes to feed her, wants her to acquire more mass
>He’s autistic as shit, tries to seduce my gf on AIM (it was 2006)
>Ends up being banned from campus for sexually assaulting a professor
>His pic sent out in an email to whole campus
>Depressed planetoid gets worse
>Later in the year we start smelling a weird scent in the room
>?????
>A few days later Quintstacker Supreme goes to the bathroom to call doctor
>Gf eavesdrops
>Planetoid has a yellowish-brown pasty substance oozing
>From her bellybutton
>She’s been saving it in case the doc needed it
>In a CUP ON HER DESK
>Gf picks up her stuff and leaves room
>Stays in my dorm that night
I still can’t think about this and not feel a bit nauseous

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Who the fuck is pushing binge eating disorder as an actual disorder? Like, who is paying for these ads? It's not because of some mysterious medical condition that you have no self-control, fatties.

>That show Tina Fey made
>Samantha Bee
>That other female comedian they keep pushing on TV
I think you might be on to something, user.

I'm mad at you for even sharing this story. People who read it will forever have it stuck in their mind even when they arent conscious of it.

nice story, got more? I really enjoy those

Are you a sadist, masochist or both?

nothing of those things :(

That's from a Reddit thread, there's a couple more floating around like that. Actually, I'm not really sure if it's specifically from that thread or if the guy stole it from somewhere else, but whatever. I don't specifically have any of those stories saved, but you can have this gem from my tumblr folder.

>That other female comedian they keep pushing on TV
lel google decided Amy Schumer was the one.

Actually I do think that's the one. God, I hate them all. Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt was unbearably bad, and Samantha Bee is just flat out unfunny.

This girl isn't unattractive because she's fat...she just has a horrible personality

HAHAHA THIS IS GOLD

lmao, attempted to do this

>tfw a meme blows fatties the fuck out

youtube.com/watch?v=m4bkQ8igOYc

That... That can't be true...

Rite guys??

copypasta
but always GOLD

just fuck her shit up

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It's about to devour a small child.

>trigger warning
>work

Working is triggering??

Fucking pathetic cunts

Does triggering ham mods count??

I'd probably give my kidney to a loved one. It should be great leverage for any argument you ever have. Just point to the surgery scar. Also would bring tremendous guilt to them if I ever die due to only having on kidney at the time. I'd probably be looked at as a saint.

Glorious

Reminds me of this guy

Hope this is real.

I'd do the exact same thing.

Every fucking time...

You get shadowbanned automatically from a ton of subreddits if you comment/subscribe to a certain subreddit. I forgot which one it was, but it is pretty hilarious how easy it is to trigger the mods on that site.

>This girl isn't unattractive because she's fat...she just has a horrible personality

I beg to differ, she's pretty ugly

Fuck these made me nauseous and light headed but I want to read more

Can you get shadowbanned here?

I've not been getting as many replies lately ...

Tess Munster had that baby, it miraculously survived

celebritybabies.people.com/2016/06/14/tess-holliday-welcomes-son-bowie-juniper/

No. People just don't think you're funny.

Again, morbidly obese people should not have children, and if your child is morbidly obese, that should be grounds enough to get CPS involved.

Looks like a condom. Girls like to blow condoms up like that and say "See?! THEY GET THIS BIG!" and act like having proper condom sizes are important.

Proper gravy is made from all the juices, fat and shit that leaks out of a piece of meat after it's been roasted for the past 3 hours. Gravy that comes in the paper packets on the other hand, is not so bad.

I cycle throwaways every few days.

Got to trigger someone while I take a shit.

There's no way this is real.

It kept going.

Poor triggered fattie mods

Eh. Not really funny, desu.

As someone who worked in Honduras for years during my post highschool years building schools and clinics, this hamplanet saying Latina pride is fucking sickening, engorging herself on the easily available food in America while people in Limon rely on soup kitchens and subsistence farming.

I hope her family hates her.

I hope she dies soon.

I know but it's late and the thread is dieing.

Trying to bump but I have no oc

Damn if I was in that situation I wouldnt give my sister a kidney even if that means getting kicked out of the house, why should you do that to your body because someone else couldnt take care of theirs?

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I think it's safe to say that she thinks that she's a victim of fatphobia and sexism etc etc but in reality people treat her like shit because she's a cunt.

Huh, interesting angle. Very forward thinking

Fuck that cunt. Let her life be the price she pays for her delusional self-deceit. Poor performance indeed

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When you get so fat you become a creature from dark souls

Hahahaa

It's not real. Just a brilliant, biting piece of satire.

Episode 3 description says her cardiologist gives her "bad news" and she's in a scooter in one of the promos. I think her heart is about to get revenge for years of abuse.

good tittle

Made me smile

Who thought that those old Dredd comics would become reality...
Somebody resurrect Hitler. It all needs to burn.

It's real. You think people get to 400lbs without having some kind of disorder?

She has such a slim face, it's astonishing.

I have the same amount of double chin and I'm about a quarter of her weight. I am so damn envious.

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youtube.com/watch?v=ypP5YItjxk0

How many in here are active smokers (cigs)?

I thought that'd be some young "trendy" girl with like dyed hair or something but it's some like middle aged woman making that trash.

Try using bigger bait for your shitposts mate

I always chuckle when the guy behind her rams his cart into her mobile

>when I do my thing and they see it theyre like woah
I would love to see him run a mile

What is going on here? What is any of that??

Looks like absolute shit

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You'd look like a saint, but you would still be dead, and your type 2 diabetic sister would still have your kidney

>fuck fatties
I'd rather not

kill me

Holy shit underage.

So bad. Sooo bad. So many edges.

literally does nothing impressive

where the fuck can I watch the new episodes?

>if you're not black and or hispanic
>and or
I know it's not the point, but still.

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>named her son FALLYN STAR

Poor kid.

>i love shocking people with what I can do.
>Most impressive thing he does is move his feet and put both hands over his head at the same time.

Depends. Actual gravy is rendered fat and meat juices mixed with flour, which isn't great for you. Packet gravy is a bit less calorie dense.

Oooo i have one like this...
>give or take probably 2 years ago, i was only 25.
>graduate med school with degree in nursing and medicine.
>decided that going RN is less hours, and nearly as much pay as a general practice doc
>makin bankaroos son
>Arrive at hospital for my 16 hour shify, now mind you i got a text from a few friends at the center that a woman came in complaining of extreme pain in his fingers and toes
>i was not prepared
>As i got into his room, because cuckily for me she's my patient.
>"NURSE NURSE NURSE NURSE I CANT FEEL MY FINGERS!"
>this woman had to be around 700 poons, and even barty can't lift that for the queen.
>i look at the x-rays that are in her file, her fucking bones practically dissolved over time, and the tissue was killed through poor oxygen flow.
>doctors had to amputate all 10 digits on her hands, and on and a half of her feet.
>explain to her that she doesnt have fingers or toes anymore.
>explain to her that her weight caused her blood vessels to burst in her hands and that it killed the fingers.
>show her the pictures the surgeon was taking during.
>looked as if she got too much gamma radiation and she was turning hulk from fingers and toes inward.
>woman is disgusted.
>fast foward to yesterday.
>woman came into ER with mild head trauma.
>same woman from before, but 580lbs lighter.

It's a bit sad she had to lose all her fingers before turning her life around

My justice boner is YYYYYYYUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGEEEE right now