have a look at this cacnerous thread (I'm OP). Someone on there told me to post here for advice so any you can give me will be greatly appreciated.
never been on Veeky Forums so ye.
long story short im shit with my social skills around girls. I get on alright with most guys but i always end up pissing off everyone i know.
How does one have a good conversation with a girl - not necessarily in a sexual way either
>I'm 18
lol ok
imagine you are talking to a guy unless it's clear that she wants the D (which is obviously not the case here).
ask her about her interests, tell her an amusing anecdote if it's relevant, talk about people who both of you know...
think twice before you send some autistic text, what would you think of a person who'd send you tons of self deprecating messages?
At your level - assuming you have poor social skills (not trying to be rude) the best advice for you to have a good conversation is to STOP trying to have one. Look at your text for example - youre definitely blowing the whole thing out of proportion, if it wasnt already said in the thread ill say it again, she just smiled out of politeness at a stranger/acquaintance and you started reading WAY too much into it and making her uncomfortable. Stop trying to have a conversation for the sake of having one - at your level you cant disguise it and its really obvious that youre just forcing it and verbal orbiting.
Also, dont reply her - she doesnt want anything to do with you. Leave it now and fade from her memory. Push further and she'll show her friends these messages from the weird guy. Stay safe bro
ok imma back off. but how would i get a conversation going even if i didnt force it. I'm hella lonely and noone starts conversations with me at school cos im seen as the 'quiet' guy. Literally no-one talks to me off their own back unless they know me
Thats the problem, when im talking to guys its usually about shit that wouldn't make sense to talk to a girl about - engineering, computers, gaming, and stupid fucking ironic memes on facebook (kevin3, special meme fresh) and YTPs and also rap music. Also when i talk to my mates we always swear and call each other cunts. I'm not sure a woman will appreciate any of that...
I wish i knew the answer too, user. My solution to this was to accept the loneliness. At least you arent completely outcasted like the other robots and have some friends.
>lol i'm so awk
1. open mouth
2. insert shotgun
girls mostly talk about other people, movies, tv series, travelling and so on.
don't mind if i do mate
Also, user, please stay off /b/ and /r9k/. Those places give a sense of normalcy to socially suicidal attitudes. It rots your brain. If you really miss the greentexts come to Veeky Forums. These stories here are more rooted in better attitudes towards life. Getting off those two boards is the best thing ive ever done besides landing a spot in uni.
Also, if you lurk Veeky Forums enough with all the exposure you may start lifting, that opens up a whole new world, you can be a Veeky Forums sperg and grills see it as cute unless your face is ugry
Look up cognitive behavioral therapy and exposure therapy.
Also give nofap a try
>inb4 placebo.
But I kinda was kinda in the same boat and still am sometimes about talking to girls. When you don't fap your body will literally force you to figure out how to talk to girls
>going to sadcunt central
Nigga I ain't clicking that
holy fucking shit dude
listen to this user
/r9k/ leave
I'm actually doing CBT but i don't see how its helping me.
Also I've tried nofap recently - lasted 4 days until doing it twice to thrice per day. Today I took the tissue box out of my room and I'm forcing myself not to look at porn on the computer or women in public
I guess its a start? but CBT hasn't helped too much i gotta say.
isn't that the r9k mentality tho?
Noted. I'm gonna stay off r9k. i dont go on /b/ as its actual cancer.
You want to be looking at women in public you mong. Unless you're trying to become a catholic priest or something. And the thing with CBT is you have to keep doing it and you have to actually expose yourself to things that scare you. Like if you get a panic attack making small talk, go out and make small talk with cashiers like twice a day or something.
Problem is I look at a woman and usually its gotta do with some sort of fetish - like if they're wearing any sort of boots or a fur coat/jacket/vest
also are you telling me to go to a store twice a day? I'm not a really material person and i need to stop filling myself up with junk food/drinks and shit. Also I'm not poor but i don't like just spending money all the time. Thing is I CAN make small talk with cashiers like 'how are you'
'hi' 'thanks' 'have a nice day' or 'do you have x item' - but when it comes to people that aren't part of a business or whatever I can't talk naturally to them. Like i talk to cashiers and assistants because its like i have to talk to them to get what i want (electronics, food, etc.) and i have a clear objective. There is no clear objective that I'd like to disclose to someone i'm talking to in casual conversation - because i dont know the person and saying 'i want to be your friend' is creepy as fuck.
No. Robots are welcome if they leave /r9k/ behind
>Problem is I look at a woman and usually its gotta do with some sort of fetish
Unfuck yourself.
how tho Mr. 38477052?
Do you go to school? Sit next to a grill during lecture and dont acknowledge her for the first half an hour so its not like you sat there on purpose. Then make a comment like *slide shows picture of taj mahal or whatever* "ive been there" or *feign interest* "thats a cute pen". You can do it user
Will try anan
okay user, I'm not gonna say that what I'm gonna tell you is the cure-all for your autism, but take what you will from it:
1. literally be yourself - like yourself before others can like you. How you eventually manage to like yourself will be totally up to you
2. when you like yourself enough, you will be more secure in yourself. Don't compare yourself to others. Compare yourself as you are today to yourself as you were yesterday.
3. on the topic of girls (or other people for that matter): just remember that 11/10 qt eats and shits just like you, has problems just like you, is going on through some shit just like you, has fears and aspirations just like you, and so on.
Please remove yourself from /r9k/ and /pol/ immediately
The 4. Remove yourself from /r9k/ is the most important bit. Surround yourself with good people and you will latch on slowly but surely. Veeky Forums may not be the absolute role models, but its a good medium between your familiar internet and the normies
CBT = cognitive behavioral therapy?
or cock and ball torture?
it was in the context of nofap so im not really sure.
cognitive behavioral therapy you dip lol
>nofap
don't do this
Stop telling girls about your emotions and problems.
Literally dries up their pussies.
prob not the guy you're referring to but im 2 weeks in and its gr8
excessive fapping is a symptom of something else, not the problem by itself. Fapping on the regular is not detrimental for your health. Not fapping is not that one weird trick that will unfuck your life.
>no porn
>no fap
>no
it was a big problem for me. it ate up large amounts of my time. i find that im a lot happier now.
yeah, the symptoms of your bigger problem bring their own problems but you just addressed the symptom and not eliminated the problem that caused it.
Think about it, you just don't fap. Something makes you fap. You go fix that. Similar to how you are fat: sure you can just not eat excessively, but unless you fix what makes you eat excessively, you will sooner or later relapse.
i think addressing the symptom is helping me fix the cause. i was fapping because i couldn't get sex and ive already alleviated that concern.
So did you get sex?
ye
what a waste
checked
Then we get retards saying "I stopped fapping, where's my sex" and you can see why nofap is flawed
I didn't say it was a big problem or anything, i said it'd force him to go out and socialize because when you don't have any other option your body will force you to figure out talking to women.
Those faggots are autists with magical thinking, I think any sane person will realize nofap is a tool to motivate you to socialize
Thanks OP. I can wake up tomorrow knowing people like you still exist and I will laugh heartily and keep enjoying my life.
>nofap raises testosterone you guise
>nofap+noporn is GOAT because porn is bad
You overestimate your common nofap adherent
Maybe the autists on /r/nofap, but the ones I've seen here have been a bit more reasonable. I still think the real issue is porn though, not fapping. But nofap has its added benefits, but I'm a boxer so it's kind of an ingrained broscience in our sport.
>I still think the real issue is porn though
if you can't get off to vanilla porn you have problems famalam
>But nofap has its added benefits, but I'm a boxer so it's kind of an ingrained broscience in our sport.
There is science behind why you shouldn't nut before you have to do something strenuous. "Sleep mode" is real
yes mate there are socially awkward people in this world im glad you figured that out