Depressed brah

Super fit depressed/PTSD brah here, with his monthly update.

It's been almost 4months of my 'recovery'.

Quick recap:
Except being a crazy slut and crying/shouting at me my ex made FUN of me when I wasn't able instantly to get an erection.

'Other men dont have that Problem'
Or
'As long as you satisfy me I wont cheat on you'

This put immense pressure on me (while I already had pressure/pride on my sexskills)

This and other shit triggered a negative thoughtloop which got worse and worse and worse.
First I felt anxiety in bed, then 1 HR before meeting her then 5hrs before meeting her and soon i was constantly Stressed out.
Oh and I DID try talking to her but as you can assume she again said stuff
'I dont und er stand how a man can be anxious about sex'

I got severely depressed, sleep was disturbed, mood/Grades went down, confidence = 0, you know the drill.

It wasnt until I finally broke up (which was after 7 months) that I finally had to face the issue. I crashed. Hard.

Things I did to get my shit together;

>Therapy
>Books
>Meditation
>healthy food
>shit tons of Vitamins
>shrooms (dose was pretty low though)

Since my last post I made 3 steps that helped me immensely:

1) put a Name on a feeling.
Now I know that my three Main States are: anxious/sad/angry.
But just giving them a Name took alot of pressure of me. It made them less 'mystical' if you will

2) locate the feeling in the body
Looking back I have no idea why it took me so long to find the regions in my body where said feeling seem to be strongest. As soon as I feel it I ask my body for MORE. Give me all you got.

3) Understanding that every feeling is ok at ALL times. Allowing myself to feel anxious at all times (yes even in bed with New girls, which might result in never having sex again) took alot of pressure off me.

Never having sex again might be a pretty scary thought initially but being ok with it is what im working on.
Because really it's not the end of the world.

Any way we can change this to an annual update?

So yea, long story short:
Gym, food and actively changing my relation to my emotions/thoughts has helped me immensely.

Sleep got much better, mood is more like 7/10 compared to 4/10 one month ago and generally things Start to look bright.

I have a long road ahead of me but at least im heading in the right direction.

Cheers guys, we'll all make it.

Never having sex again is avoidance. On one hand you claim to be more accepting and understanding of your emotions, but then you 180 that stance at the end. Be okay with yourself, sure, that should be everyone's goal, but understand too that a better partner wouldn't have put you here in the first place.

Also, PTSD from a woman? Bruh...

I know, im taking up so much space which could me a manlet/nohomo/scooby/diddlylift thread

This board is all about self improvement so my post might help some of you guys

Dont get me wrong I do plan to find some qt. eventually.
But right now my thoughts are telling me that a life without sex isn't worth living.
That just isn't the case, there is so much more. I was happier as a fucking virgin than I am now.

Yea I know. It's fucked.

This seems like a good thread to post this in

>been talking to girl for 3 months
>things going well
>go on dates hang out multiple times a week
>spent a whole week at her place
>cuddle kiss she calles me baby and all that stuff
>do relationship stuff
>yesterday get on the topic of her and I some how
>she says she doesn't feel a spark and doesn't see her dating me
>then proceeded to say she loves when I hold her and how safe she feels in my arms
>loves when I cuddle and kiss her
>she gets a wiggly feeling in her stomach when she sees me
>but no spark

Should I just cut it off With her? We both agreed we love spending time with eachother and being with eachother. But to hear her say she doesn't feel a "spark" really hurt me.. I mean surely she has to feel something if she allows me to sleep in her bed and do the things we do with eachother..

Or should I try and tough it out and see if maybe that "spark" will develop over a few more months.. We have only been "dating" for 3 months is it to soon?

Op here. Dude run. She will 100% dump you as soon as she finds someone with a spark. You dont wanna live with that uncertanity in your life. Believe me I know.

The crazy ex told me she LOVED me more than anyone ever before. She wanted us to marry. She had blushes on her face when she saw me and smiling at me.

Guess what? As soon as I told her about my anxiety issues (at the end) she told me she can't be there for me. That I need to fix myself and than maybe we can try again.

One Week after breakup she was out partying and 2 Weeks later she had Tinder installed.

I dont give a shit about that im just happy this garbage human isn't in my life any more.

SAVAGE

Damn it op.. I don't want to just run. I can feel there is stuff there between us. I don't know if it's cause she just doesn't want a relationship right now or if it's just too soon. When we we're talking yesterday she broke down and started crying. I just don't want to give up on her but me just thinking her say "I don't feel a spark" kills me. But I'm supposed to go over to her place tonight to talk to her so we'll see how it goes.

Dude, my girl cried constantly telling me how happy she is that she found me.

When I came back from a holiday she actually cried telling me how much she missed me and never to leave her again.

Dude you have to understand that not all girls are full of feelings. Especially those whose hearths have been already broken.
They just cry for attention and pity. Dont Fall into the same trap others did.

The fact that she told you could into your face that 'she doesnt feel a spark' MEANS she will hurt you again.
Be honest with yourself. Would you have said such a thing to a girl and then still kept her around? She is using you.

I stayed with my crazy ex for 7 months cause i couldnt stand the fact of hurting her. And what happened? She prolly has had 3 guys since I legt.

Please RESPECT your needs. Not hers.
BE HoNest with yourself.

Im hoping for your best user...

I know user and Ive just been thinking a lot since all of this shit happened yesterday.. Like I said I'm supposed to talk to her later on tonight so I'll see how it goes

Ok rememeber one last thing:
Keep an eye on your FEELINGS. If her words trigger any pain, sadness or something else negative it means she wont ever fullfill your emotional needs. She just doesnt get you and that's not your fault. Respect your feelings dont ignore them for some pussy.

Because I bet my ass she will say stuff like that.

ANY Kind of uncertanity like that will be pure poison. You deserve a girl that is head over heels in love with you. Not some shit like that

You're a side bitch. She comes to you for free attention and when a better cock comes along you're going to be left behind.

Time to move on. You might be autistic Veeky Forums bro but you still deserve respect.

>try to zoom image
>its 225x225
now im depressed too

Will do user thank you very much..

Well things were going well and her ex is trying to get back into her life I believe.. Yeah I know I should have stopped right then and there but i didn't.. I know there was something there so tonight hopefully her and I talking can help resolve some things.

Be careful with it. It takes so many people forever to learn that just because YOU feel something there doesn't mean she does. She's made it clear there's no spark, but you seem to see in her something more than a platonic relationship. I'm telling you now that a relationship can't form or survive with that kind of imbalance.

Nobody said it would be easy to let go, but you have to understand that you can't force it to happen. Are you fine being her friend that comforts her when she's down but that she has no romantic interest in you? If you can honestly answer yes, then have at it. But if not, it really is time to move on. Life's too short to waste trying to make something out of nothing.

That's the whole thing.. Her and I cuddle and kiss and have sex.. She texts me saying her day is shitty and askes me to come over.. So there must be something there. It's horrible all the things you guys are saying I already know but I have that little shredded of hope that I can make it work or thag the spark will re ignite

Lmfaoooo, nigga run. That is a girls way of saying "ayyy so when i do feel that spark with another guy, peace lmfao"

I hate to say it but you're a beta cuck my friend. She's probably fucking her ex or planning on dumping you, I have been in your situation before.

I am sure you will get hardened to it like myself once your heart gets shattered and your pride stamped on.

Yeah I figured you were going to say that.

Suit yourself, but it's just going to hurt more the longer you drag it out before she moves on. People usually need it to happen to them before they understand, though, so I get your skepticism.

All that's left to say is good luck!

Thanks user I appreciate it

Dude, go fuck yourself.
The man is pouring his heart out.
Take your pain and hatred of yourself out on yourself, and go slit your wrists to dead animals or whatever. Jesus.

Hope you see more of an improvement user, most of us have all been there at some stage just gotta keep going on through it man.
It does get better so keep that head up and go on be a sick cunt

>>This and other shit triggered a negative thoughtloop which got worse and worse and worse.
>First I felt anxiety in bed, then 1 HR before meeting her then 5hrs before meeting her and soon i was constantly Stressed out.
>Oh and I DID try talking to her but as you can assume she again said stuff
>'I dont und er stand how a man can be anxious about sex'

I don't get it

Why would you stay longer than a fucking day with this piece of shit

Do you consider yourself unworthy of being treated like a human being

Thanks (: we'll See how things look in a month

It's hard to say man. I know it sounds stupid but at the time I really thought that i matter alot to her and even kinda liked her.

Life is not black/white.

I regret that shit deeply but at the time I really thought that I need to 'man up and be a man like others'

Welp now i know better....

This. I'd rather see this shit than more scooby memes.

Asked a girl I've been seeing for about 1 month out. she said she wanted to see how I really am (tho imo that involves living with each other and there's no say either of us would do) (also called me a "nice guy" earlier in the date if that's significant at all) but then said she's attracted to me inside/out. Am I wasting my time?

Fpbp

No bother at all man, down the line when you're feeling 100% and start to get down again don't worry people get sad for no reason time to time.
Like I landed my dream job and got with an amazing girl but I still felt down then felt happy a few weeks later dispite nothing changing.
My ponit being just keep going man it all workds out eventually when you least expect it to

Man girls are weird, she could be genuine or playing you. How long have you been talking to her bar the 1 month yous are going out?

Walter is one of the most /stoic/ people in all of /tv/, I'd put him right below Stannis Baratheon

Are you sure she isn't just confused with her feelings?

Might just be her needing to process her emotions for you, to realize that there truly is a spark.
I'd recommend you guys have some real deep talk this evening, discussing deep shit like ''Where you want this to go'' and ''what you feel for each other''. But leave them with an open ending/untied, and then agreeing to have very little contact over a few days letting the topics mature over a few days. Essentially, just letting your thoughts on the topics mature for a while, to avoid dumb in the moment decisions.

I didn't feel the spark with the girl I've been with for the past 3 years at first, we had one of these deep conversations, agreed to go without any contact for 3 days, and it turned out to be one of the best decisions I've ever made. Had I rushed it, I probably wouldn't have been with her because I would've gone full on autism, spazzing the fuck out and made a dumb in the moment decision.

Maybe you're putting too much pressure on yourself and emphasis on things "outside" of you leading to a decay of self worth, self love, and love for existing(or whatever you wanna call that last one).

I'd love to contribute to your thread, but I'm a bit pressed to get things done today.

One thing that helped immensely for me when I was "depressed" was Zen Buddhism as explained by Alan Watts. I listen to the man almost every day and it never ceases to surprise me how confused about my situation I really am. Give him a listen. I recommend the "Out of your Mind" seminar. At the very least you'll walk away with a new found perspective of yourself and how your relationship is to the rest of the world.

A decent copy of OP's image for the lazy.

69deep666me

Thanks man, will do (:

>decent

>full of artifacts
>9gag watermark

pls go

I don't know if you're still here user but I feel she is just confused with her feelings.. And now that her ex is trying to get back into her life or that he is texting her it's just fucking up what little her and I had built. Hell I told her last night I remember what she had on when we first met and she said and she started to cry a mad said "what did I have on?" And after I told her she just started balling her eyes out.. So I know there's something there I just don't know if she's scared to let another guy in or what.

I was extremely depressed for about a month or so, thinking about suicide daily. I was unemployed and had dropped out of school.

Then I found a job and now I'm back in school. The moment I got my shit together my depression disappeared overnight.

My point is that maybe some people do need medication because of chemical problems in the brain, but I believe that more often than not people get depressed because their life sucks, so think about your situation and try to fix it before taking the drugs. That's all I know about depression.

Yeah man, fuck you, plain and clear youre a bitch. Get the fuck out of the thread. This guy IS pouring his heart out.

Op here, that's what I think aswell.
Antidepressants will mostly just mask the Problem.

I think going inside (via therapy/books/Meditation) to find the real cause and then taking active steps in the right direction is the best approach.

But this is of course a harder nut to crack and takes more time/energy.

The only drugs that appeal to me are those which could give me some deeper insight just like lsd, mdma or dmt.

I might try some when I feel Im ready for it...

Thanks guys, but really this is Veeky Forums after all. Im actually surprised that he is the only ass so far