Hi Veeky Forums, before reading my post I’ll like to make 4 disclaimers: The first one is that though this might not seem fit related I really believe that at least it concerns to mental health and a healthy life in general, and the fact that autism levels seem lower in here than in advice pushed me to post here. The second is that I’ll be pretty vague describing my life for the sake of keeping some degree of anonymity. Because of some things I’ve done it would be pretty easy to pinpoint who I am without much effort. The third is that I REALLY wanted to ask whoever is going to take the time to reply to please understand that it is a very serious matter to me at least, so please don’t take anything here as a joke. The forth is that the whole thing seems long but takes 2 minutes to read at most.
A little background to the situation is that I’ve had, like many, a really shit life. Most of my family (including my dad) died while I was still very young, and for some reason or the other, even people that knew my family didn’t reach out to help (not that I can blame them since life is pretty shit even without having to help people), and even made it so things were even harder economically and what not. This combined with the fact that I wasn’t particularly good looking, led me to be extremely introverted and academically focused. During high school I pretty much discarded even the idea of having a girlfriend since I didn’t really have anything to give and the whole thing would have been just settling with whatever I could get (at least, in retrospect I never got bullied which is pretty sweet). Cont.
This didn’t change in college. Just that at some point I decided to self-improve: I came across fit, got interested in lifting, and now I’d like to think that I’m pretty decent looking (enough to have been cat called a couple of times at least when I’m not completely covering my body, my face aint something to write home about tho). And despite being natty the whole time and starting late as fuck I’m extremely close to hitting a WR in my sport. I got the best possible results in college (vastly, and not with lack of a lot of effort) and started a phd. Became a pilot, learnt a butt-load of languages, also to play the guitar fairly well, and started my own thing to be financially independent despite not working. What came out of all of this? In my mid-twenties I now realize that I haven’t been happy in my entire life. What I always wanted was to be loved while I was young. Either because the things that happened, or just because I’m a fucking retard, I’ve never been with anyone. And to make matters worse after much thought I realize why. Is not like, lately at least, I lacked the opportunity; you know when someone makes it extremely obvious that they are into to you? What I’d call a literal 8/10 20yo kept checking me out during one of my classes making it way to clear she was in to me and keep trying to get the ball rolling. And I didn’t want to. Because I feel like I need to get what I lost way back. At this point after so much time, being with a girl that has had boyfriends would feel like I’m being used. But what can I do? Is not like as a 25-ish guy you can go up to a 16yo and tell her if she wants to go out. Is not even about manning the fuck up. If my age and experience gave me anything, is the ability to have no fucking shame, like, at all. Cont.
Jonathan Bailey
I really can’t see this as stubbornness, I’ve held this feeling for so long and I’ve tried so hard to become someone who deserves to get it. But I really don’t know what to do anymore. I keep getting older and things just don’t seem like they are going to happen. The thing is that the same thought keeps coming to my mind: Is it just like that? You fucked up when you were younger now GG, time to move along and fuck hoes? Enjoy regretting what you couldn’t get for the rest of your miserable life. It isn’t even like a /pol/ weeabo thing of “muh pure wifu”. But it is something I NEED to experience even ONCE to be able to move along. To end the whole speech, what triggered me lately, and made me write this is that I was rolling around in my own filth and self-loathing, as usual, when my brother asked me to go with him to get some stuff. I was waiting for him outside the store in front of a high school when it fucking happened again. A 16-17yo or whatever qt3.14 kept checking me out. And what could I’ve done? Pulled her out from her group of friends and be like “yo sweety, I’m like a decade older than you but, you wanna hang out?” Meeting someone like that trough people I know seems impossible. Anyways I’m prolly gonna kill myself shortly after getting that WR. Thanks for the help in advance.
Jace Flores
desu the best advice i can give you is this
Only come here when you're looking for specific info. This website is a timesink and you'd be better off developing normalfag interests and living a life with minimal net involvement. Get over your fixation on romance, shit don't last most of the time. Focus on your health and fuck the rest.
Easton Wilson
But senpai. Romance, once, is the only thing I'm asking for. You are literally telling me to give up everything.
Samuel Thompson
Not that user, but...
You're asking for self-esteem, even though you don't realize it. Romance will NOT plug that hole. You'll destroy any opportunity that arises unless you fix yourself first, unless you learn to love yourself first.
Just in case you want a real solution, learn Metta meditation, also known as loving-kindness meditation. There's plenty of info on the web.
Sebastian Wood
I partly agree, but after actually going to therapy over and over the problem always comes back to the same. I feel like shit because nobody, at no point in my life looked at me and said, my fucking virginity. Pretty much the only thing you can give only once, I'll give it to you because you aren't a total piece of shit. I like to thing that I know me enough at this point to know that that, even if not completely, would ease the burden I feel a great deal. Thanks for sparing a though tho.
Caleb Bell
25+ guy of any ranking is pretty much past the time of finding a young virgin girl. Your expectations are unrealistic and if you don't alter them then you are just going to find more disappointment or end up getting in trouble for messing with underage girls.
Blake Reyes
Believe me when I say this is a lot more effective than therapy. Give it a try for a month, one hour a day. It's extremely unlikely not to show clear benefits way before the month ends.
Aiden Lopez
Luckly where I live the legal issue is not that much of a problem past 16.
Jackson Rodriguez
One more thing that I'd like to add is that this isn't something I've not devoted some though to. At this point changing my expectations seems as hard if not harder than getting what I want. I really wish I could. But I don't seem to be able to.
Hudson Ortiz
Do you want advice or confirmation?
Gavin Ward
Your expectations are not realistic. You can't simply think your way out of that. Just because you strongly want something doesn't mean you'll have it or even that you deserve it. Your expectations are creating artificial limitations that you are likely to never overcome. If I were you I would work at breaking them down or risk being forever alone. Every woman who is not a virgin certainly is not a whore.
David Jenkins
You're just playing the victim card. Wahh wahh my life a shit wahhhhh. Get over the victim mindset and realize you can have love. But wanting love with teens? You just a fucking pedo. You will have nothing important in common with a teen.
Eli Parker
Advise ovbiously, but I know that my post might come across as someone that feels like going all yolo and fucking a teen when it's not the case. I don't give a shit about the age. Might as well be 17 or 18 since alegedly 50% of people reach that age w/o fucking. I want someone to give themselves to me like they've never given themselves to someone else.
I do realise about this. I unfortunately find it extremely hard to change regardless. I am aware it's a limitation. I just don't seem to be able to overcome it and move on.
I'm not trying to play victim. I am aware everyone has their own problems, and that they are highly lickely harder than mine. >You will have nothing important in common with a teen. The fact that I don't know how to fucking love. You might think is not possible to have inoccence past a certain age, but is pretty clear that I wouldn't know how to cope otherwise.
Bentley Gray
Then unfortunately if you don't choose to change (regardless of difficulty) then you shouldn't expect results any different than your current ones. And more time will pass.
Hunter Cox
It's clear you wouldn't know how to cope with anything, because you're inventing a problem whose solution will do nothing to eliminate your underlying issue.
It's also clear you won't take my advice. Love yourself first is not just a meme. And that technique IS effective.
But you don't want that. You say you "wish" you could change, but that's not what you WANT.
Jordan Gutierrez
Not OP but what is metra meditation. Is it the same as mindfulness? Where do I start
Ayden Brown
No, it's different.
There's plenty of material on the web and I suggest and you read as much as you can about the technique.
Lemme dig up a few links for you. I won't promise they'll be the best because I learned about this stuff a long time ago and do it on my own now, so I still recommend you search for more.
Colton Johnson
OP brah don't you even think about listening to these sad cunts trying to tell you to accept used up whores or do some woo woo bullshit meditation hippy shit. That's just distraction from what you already told us is the real issue
You want a virgin girl, go fucking get her man. You say you're starting a phd, well find some shy first year girl. There's still plenty of girls who make it to that age unspoiled. Go to on-campus church groups, even if you don't believe in it you can meet people. If this is really what you want and what will make you feel like you are ready to live your life then fucking do it however you can.
I don't even know how to talk to women anymore, I seem to have become so detached from human connections I can't stand anybody who I can connect with. Which excludes a lot of the population. I meet a girl recently whom made me feel again, like wheat to a scythe my hopes were cut down when I found out she is basically a "I hang out with guys because its less drama" girl and has made out with a few people I know.
I'm going to probably die alone, and its so hard to say that, all I wanted was somebody to share my time with but my expectations are too high and my ability to make connections with people are too low. It's not like I'm unpopular, I just do nothing to maintain the relationships I've already built. I know I haven't even started life yet and I'm already this cynical that I'm going to have a bad time, but I'm not giving up, I will suffer for every fucking day untill I that girl, and if she never appears, at least I gave it my best fucking shot and never sold myself out. Don't kill yourself user, just accept the void and live like you want, find a qt virgin 18 y.o. so you don't go to jail, they are out there somethere.
I'm 19, and the world has already been really fucking cruel to me, I fear for the future, but I know I will battle tooth and nail to make paradise out of this hell.
Jason Campbell
Pal, I know you are really trying to help me. But how can you be so sure that what I'm asking for wouldn't solve the problem?
I used to hate the way I looked, I could have gone all self-acceptance, but I chose to change, and I'm extremely happy with the results.
Does it seem that unreal that I'd meet someone that could be what I'm looking for?
Connor Butler
Gfto faggot. 19 year old you has had it fine. Stop whining like a little bitch.
Benjamin Morales
Unfortunately, yes. It does seem unreal that pinning your hopes for happiness on taking someone's virginity will end well for you. If your self-esteem is so damaged that this is what you live for, getting it won't fix it. Moreover, if you pay attention to your language, you're asking someone to SAVE you with her BODY.
Step back and you'll see how absurd this is. I'm not saying you shouldn't have what you want, but it won't get rid of the pain and the relationship, assuming you actually want one, is unlikely to work under these conditions.
Your real problem can be solved, though.
Jordan King
OP here, pal, all the things I've acheved, I'd trade them in just a second to be 19 again. Is not like I'm in the possition where I can give you any advice, but if you want some: Keep going out and fucking up while you still can. You'll laugh at the stupid shit you did, and cry at the stupid shit you didn't do.
Carson Fisher
you being a sad little bitch and telling him he doesn't deserve to experience a part of basic human existence isn't solving anything. just because you settled doesnt mean everyone else should
Ian Howard
>oneitis for not even anyone specific Cut it out. You're weak willed and overcompensate for it. You will garner little sympathy here, and rightly so.
Josiah Morris
11/10 post mah boy
You made my day a little less shit. The church thing seems a bit weird though.
Lincoln Bailey
You're stupid. I'm not telling him to settle, I'm telling him to fix himself first.
Austin Green
In the past 3 years my parents got devoriced, I found out my dad was transgender, I'm a sperm donor baby and I don't know my real father. my lifelong pet cat ran off and died somewhere. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship. I have fucking hearing problems in my left ear. I have a massive widows peak hairline. And now my sister has decided to become a man too. My dad got drunk and abused my trust to steal my tv. My dad is still a drunk/high bitch telling god knows what to my sibings. my new stepmom thinks i'm being unfair to not talk to my dad. MY WHOLE FUCKING FAMILY LIED TO ME FOR 17 YEARS, EVERYBODY. I HAVE A HUGE AMOUNT OF TRUST ISSUES, ALL I WANT IS TO FIX MY SHITTY FUCKING LIFE. And while I know getting a girlfriend will only make my life harder, at least I can have the illusion that she isn't toying with my trust.
I'm not doing anything too crazy, I am in a frat though. maybe I do need to loosen up, I just think I can handle with without resorting to drinking and man whoring. I have good grades, and I relax often, I just want somebody to share the ride with me you know.
Christian Nguyen
I took 3 girls virginities in high school. First at 14, second at 16 , and third at 17. That's not love or romance you fucking imbecile. Date a girl you can call your best friend and you'll find someone you can love forever. Been with the same girl for 15 years now, she's the last girl who's virginity I took. Shes changed mentally throughout the years and I've had the opportunity to fall in love with her multiple times. When other girls check me out or try to flirt with me , I can only find myself comparing how much they are not like my gf. We've been living together for 8 years now. Shits cash. Leaving to California in a few days for vacation.
Oliver Kelly
And so I see we have another hopeless incel shitposting thread. Sage this shit report and hiding the thread. Off topic for Veeky Forums
Landon Reed
>being someone's first isnt love >oh yeah i'm still with the last girl who's virginity i took. true love and best friends, shits cash
are you fucking dense or what
Anthony Morales
>she's the last girl who's virginity I took
I'm willing to bet you wouldn't feel the same had you not been her first. Or that you could have gone on normally without experiencing what you did in those moments. It doesn't seem much for you because you had it. But I feel like it is the only thing I want.
>I just want somebody to share the ride with me you know. I know. It doesn't seem unreal that you can find her, so gl with that. And for the other thing, I'm not telling you to snort coke and wake up on a rooftop in mexico, but if you feel like doing something, then you most likely should.
Gavin Thomas
>I've been with more than one girl >she must love me less by that logic
Dylan Evans
Wouldn't have mattered if she had been with someone else before. She would still be the same person.
Chase Flores
I don't think you are getting his point. Being HER first allowed you to develop that relationship.
Oliver Fisher
exactly. if she had fucked 12 guys before him, there wouldn't be any relationship. he'd just be another dick
William Cox
Thanks user, ill take you advice, I think I am too overcautious sometimes. I haven't give up hope, I just get disheartened sometimes, I appreciate your advice.
I hope things workout for you too, As I'm sure you know, age of consent is different in different country, find your q.t.
Christian Reyes
You guys are ignoring that he had taken other girls' virginities before. user is probably better than you at relationships, period. Perhaps you should listen to him.
Parker Foster
No. 15 years of relationship down fucking boil down to taking someone's virginity. It's work. It's learning to understand a person and being vulnerable enough for then to understand you. And when they change into a different person over the years , you learn to love this new person too. OP thinks that taking someone's virginity will create this bond and this person will love them forever but it will not. Didn't work with the first 2 girls I fucked for reason . They're personality was shit
Adam Thompson
desu sounds like your personality is shit my dude. You know you could never find anyone else to put up with your sorry ass now and so you 'work' and 'learn to love' (sounds clingy af) to make this one stay
OP is better off taking advice from anyone in this thread who isnt you
Dominic Nelson
LMAO
Jaxson Allen
What's you're longest relationship ? Ever been with someone longer than 10 years? Are they the same exact person you met 10 years ago?
You're some dumb faggott that no one gives a Shite about and will have unsuccessful relationships because you're probably in the single digits on IQ.
Liam Ortiz
Don't waste your time, dude. You're dealing with a bitter troll.
Nathan Jenkins
yeah dude congrats you are the best at relationships. I'm glad you see relationships as what they really are, a fucking internet dick measuring competition. With that kind of brilliant perspective (and apparently a double digit IQ, bravo on that too) you really are a good source of advice after all.
Jaxon Wood
What's your input on relationships then since you can't attack my arguments most likely due to lack of experience
Cameron Clark
stopped reading after the first paragraph
Michael Hill
>lack of experience
you've been with 3 girls
Anthony Walker
Be glad, this thread is a shitshow
Oliver Campbell
One with over 15 years.
Still waiting on your master thesis on relationships.
Thomas Walker
You sound like a bitter lonely faggott that will never be loved.
Nathan Evans
It's a shame people think having one relationship makes them an expert and somehow capable of advising someone in a completely different scenario, with completely different personal issues and desires.
"I've driven a car once, so I'm pretty much an expert on every type of car and driving"
Thomas Taylor
Even more amazing is that lonely bitter trolls think their advice on relationships is worth anything.
"I've driven a few shit cars, so I'm pretty much an expert on the type of car you want, though I've never had it either"
Jacob Garcia
>I know how to drive one car really well. Better than anyone else. Let me tell you what's worked for me and you can try with your car.
Zachary Evans
except that he did exactly what OP wants to do, had success, then told OP not to do that.
Nicholas Hernandez
He said it wouldn't have mattered because it was all about who it was with. Did u not read that it didn't work the first two times. As someone who did what OP wants to do he might have some insight.
Liam Wright
I've driven a lot of shit cars. I'm an expert on shitty cars, and one thing that all of my shitty cars had in common is that they were used. Yeah, OP should definitely not worry about finding a new car.
Charles Wood
But you do realise that it's like a model telling a fat person starving themselves to look good is not worth it right? With that input you are more than entitled to have your reservations
Wyatt Green
They had another thing in common. You.
And that's a far better indicator of shit.
Adam Jenkins
>Did u not read that it didn't work the first two times.
did you read the part where he went with a non-virgin and it worked out splendidly? where was that part?
Isaiah Johnson
>What's your input on relationships then since you can't attack my arguments most likely due to lack of experience
Eli Jenkins
I'm not LTR-user. I simply claim you're shit. Your posts are sufficient evidence.
Chase Brooks
That's where his advice came in that it didn't matter if she was a virgin or not the most important thing was to find someone with the right personality.
> at this point OP is just some pedo if he can't find a woman his age
Logan Watson
>Pedo, with a 16 year old girl. What has the world become
