December 2015

>December 2015
>8/10 blonde at my workplace goes up to me with a mistletoe and says loudly so everyone can hear, "Hey user, we're both under the mistletoe!"
>everyone but me is howling with laughter
>I completely ignore her with my regular neutral facial expression
>the next day she does the same thing
>I react the same way but kind of move slightly towards her but only to reach something
>she immediately flinches backwards and does a small scream (all while smiling)
>her and everyone else laughed even harder
>tfw Christmas is coming up again and I have the same job

Who else will always be a loser no matter how Veeky Forums or intelligent you become?

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You were supposed to kiss her. Do better this year.

>move slightly towards her
>she flinches and screams

ahahahah fuck imagine being that beta

>You were supposed to kiss her

literal autism

>the mistletoe beta

Sounds more like they were bullying him and attempting to kiss her would have resulted in even more humiliation. From the sounds of OP he had very low standing in that social group.

OP I don't think anything would have happened honestly so you can chill. Girl was immature and probably pretty nasty behind your back too. For what it's worth obviously it's just based on one post

the level of uggo/omega/disgusting male you'd need to be to have that occur is absurd

you must be a real peice of shit

Ney, dont do anything m8. Keep walking / working

Next time, just grab her head and French her when she isn't expecting it, grab the mistletoe and throw it in the trash and walk away. No one will laugh.

Stupid exaggeration. OP is young and shy and his type A colleagues demean him. Big deal.

Nice power fantasy.

>fired and put in jail for sexual assault

nope, this type of behaviour only occurs to omegas.

thats literally what an omega is in nature by definition.

you need to be an abortion of a human to attain that status, an actual bottomfeeder/dreg.

You're like sjws calling everyone they don't like a misogynistic racist. As if OP is doomed to a life of social defeat. Give me a break.

> You're like sjws calling everyone they don't like a misogynistic racist.

You're like an RPG character with an intelligence too low to create an appropiate metaphor.

In future just stick to browsing tumblr, don't strain what limited brain cells you have.

Go to HR and report her for sexual harassment. Then Sue the company for eleventy zillion dollars

Easy
Coolface.png

>he's never been gently placed into a holding cell

fucking double standards man. if a guy did that to a woman he would be fired from the job and probably placed on sexual offenders list

go to your superior and tell him about this or even report her to the police. i get it, they're fucking with you but fuck that bitch and your coleagues. equal rights yo

My intelligence is average as is yours based on our conversation so far. My social awareness and life experience however puts yours to shame.

>fucking double standards
Shitty autistic meme. Women are the seducers.

Top kek

I actually read that very differently, now I see. Thanks m8.
Chill OP, I guess you did okay.

>tfw i catch feelings for hookups
>meet 8/10 serbian hightest online
>tell her i'm italian when i'm actually albanian
>agree to meet
>get a handjob on first date
>fuck her 2 days later
>everything i told her about me was a lie
>i still managed to fall in love with her even if she was a whore
Why am i like this?

Go to HR and report her for workplace bullying.

or you could just not be such a little bitch.

up to you famalam.

women are nothing without men

if evolution would give men the ability to give birth as well as women, they would be long instinct.

pic related, your views

Buy mistletoe in bulk from an online shop somewhere.

Go into work early and hang one up in her cubicle or wherever. Don't say anything about it and don't let anyone see you. She will think it's cute or from a secret Santa or some shit.

Every day bring more and more mistletoe in and hang them all over her workspace. Like 2 the second, 4 the third, 8 the fourth day etc. She will get rapidly creeped out and disturbed.

Within a couple weeks you'll be covering every surface with dozens of boughs of mistletoe. Never let on it is you doing it, never laugh at her or let any hints slide.

Slowly torment this bitch with Christmas Cheer.

Next time just make a joke out of it to steal their fun.

>Damn, Mandy, if you keep this up, people are going to think you're desperate.

Don't let what they say get to you. Continue to hold yourself high and act as though they are children. Don't be rude but don't let yourself think they are in any way on your own maturity level. Eventually they will feel bad and fuck off.

no

That is sexual harassment and your bosses will take it very seriously if you tell them.

I feel bad for you OP, this reminds me of when I was a fat yr 7 and then I lost weight and started clenching my jaw so it made me look hot and then I told those sluts 2 go fuck themselves

I hate when women bully like that. I'm so sorry user. I've been bullied like that by two girls in my life. It's really gross, if you complain then you're beta, if you don't you're still are, according to stupid society rules. I wish i had an advice.

This is the only correct answer in this thread.

Companies are scared as fuck of being sued. Even better, complain about sexual harrassment. Fuck the SJWs at their own game.

This.

If you're american you have the sjw thing going for you

> A-and then they put up a miseltoe! Then chad laughed at me!

> Ok. All miseltoe is banned from the office. Now get out.

report made up /r9k/ garbage

lol, "bullied". Implying she doesnt want OPs meatlog.

>2016
>Being this virgin

This guy is special.

>call yourself gay
>say Stacy and Chad make fun of you because of your sexual orientation, tease you and Stacy tries to kiss you
they both get fired, you get a raise

> You're now labelled as a trouble maker & potential litigator. We begin building a trail of paper-work so we can justify firing you in 6 - 12 months.

Goodbye.

Make a joke and roll with it you autist.

>implying paper trail can defeat discrimination claims

Should have just lol'd and said "are you coming on to me" or some cheeky kind of response

If you have a very low social standing and your coworkers tease you you should see it as an opportunity to prove you aren't a humorless robot

Are you kidding me? Someone in the situation that OP described is fuckded beyond hope - nothing he could possibly do or say would gain him back any standing.

>8/10 blonde at my workplace goes up to me with a mistletoe

Should have said you're Muslim. Next time do this and cause a huge scene

youtube.com/watch?v=pz0m3MtJpQo

>tfw 2017 approaches
>tfw I'm finally gonna make it 2017
Can only get better now brahs

>try this again outside of work and see what happens. Who knows, you might get lucky.
ez, this (or something similar) should have been automatic

Fucking kek

???

There really are so many people that lack even the least bit of empathy on this board, it's hilarious.
You really think that answering something cheeky helps when someone is such a huge outcast in a social circle that they openly bully him and pull of the disgustingly vile crap that was described in the OP?

>Spend that time looking for a better, higher paying job

Pretty much every job change SHOULD come with a pay raise.

Literally, yes. It's all about your frame of mind. Why take anything seriously? Why overthink anything? Have fun with life.

I would do the same thing so I can't ridicule you OP.

But imagine you like a girl, You spend over a year trying to muster up the courage to express your feelings, unsure if she likes you back. You finally get the opportunity and take the dive, and she sits there emotionless. She actually likes you but you will never know how she feels because she is too afraid to reciprocate. Meanwhile you feel like shit because you just got rejected.

If you're so afraid of sexual tension like I am, just go for a casual and light hearted peck on the cheek. Maybe even say something like "you're lucky you're cute" but say it with confidence otherwise you will come across as an asshole.

So much autism in this thread
OP just kiss her next time, don't go all in but just a quick peck on her lips, why the fuck else would she be standing under the mistletoe with you?

user, i work in an office that is like 99% women. All day I sit at my desk trying to not react one way or another while they do things and say things that a man would be fired for and have his career and family ruined over. They even make it a point to sarcastically say that exact thing would happen. The CEO is a woman, the VP of HR is a woman. All three of my bosses up the ladder are women. The middle boss, despite my lack of any type of reaction, often says that she believes I enjoy it. I can't do anything about it but continue looking for another job making the same or more.

Are you high on drugs? Kek

You are advising someone that is being bullied to just make cheeky responses to get respect amongst his bullies and then talk something about "the state of mind" and shit.

You are probably stoned, right?

No

>actually kiss her
>just a prank bro
>get fired for sexual assault

So are they all ugly and fat as fuck then? Or just annoying?

>she was a whore
Why though? How do you know that?

Does anyone else smell a workplace sexual harrassment payout.

>get a handjob on first date
How do you even got a question like that ?

Man I know how you feel. I got humilated last christmas as well

>Office has a 'secret santa' thing where everyone buys a random person gifts
>I get the name of one of the cutest girls in the whole office
>panic and spend literally weeks trying to think of a gift to buy her
>here her talking about how she struggles to get to the gym recently for her cardio
>decide to buy her a gym related gift
>go out and buy her a bike for 320 pounds
>didn't realised it was meant to be a small thing
>bring it to work on the day of the santa gift giving
>come early, nobody is around but some shitskin cleaners
>put the bike by her desk
>leave and go for a walk so I can come in when the office is full and nobody knows it was me
>everyone in the office crowding around the bike
>qt looks fucking baffled
>gift giving happens
>everyone starts to tell who they got a gift for
>everyone wants to find out who got the girl
>I try to keep quiet but eventually they figure out it was me
>the girl says thanks but she can't accept it, because it was meant to be cheap gifts
>my gift was from an office chad and was a mug with 'ladykiller' written on
>I feel uncomfortable and I spent the money
>didn't really have the money to spend
>for some reason I decide to let her keep the bike
>laugh and say ''THIS SANTAS SECRET IS THAT HE WON THE LAPLAND LOTTERY, I CAN BUY 10 BIKES A DAY, KEEP IT''
>she says really
>Nod and she thanks me and even hugs me
>see her ride the bike to work each day
>tfw this years santa is coming
>people expecting me to buy an expensive gift

I don't know what to do. I am bad with money, I have less than 1k saved despite paying no rent.

Girls like to fuck.
Whats the point of waiting for any retarded arbitrary period of time just to fulfill some nonexistent fundamentalist/Disney-induced fantasy of "purity"?
If you like each other, you fuck. Some people may take a bit longer to be comfortable enough to do that, but that's it.

You autismoed harder than most autists do in their whole lives.

Sign up for cryogenic freezing guinea pig.

Yes, but that's exactly what word 'whore' means doesn't it ?

Jesus fuck. Seek help.

A whore is someone who has sex for money , maybe for validation if you stretch the term a bit.
So, no.

I believe he meant slut,

Key that opens locks, etc.

This time bring a hat with mistle toe dangling from it, meet her at her desk. Smash her over the head and cut her feet off.

wow you're an autism too, who could have guessed...

cringed hard bro

HAHAHAHAHHA.

>BUYING A FUCKING BIKE

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

>she flinches and screams

320 quid, damn.

that mug must have been salt in the wound, too. its almost like he knew what you'd bought.

>see her ride the bike to work each day
you're a fucking retard but at least that's some consolation.

holy shit, this guy was mercilessly bullied in school. what are your stats bro? lmme guess:

12 swirlies
8 pantsings
3 beaten-ups

>disgustingly vile crap
massive exaggeration also

I'm chad and buying some beta dude an ironic gift like lady killer on the mug is so something I would do.
He can smell the beta on you bro, it was a deep passionate shiv.

My friends would make fun of this jewish guy at work. Oven jokes and shit. He filmed them and got $350k for discrimination.

Thats more than hed make in 10 years working there. Fuck shit up OP. Film and make a scene.

Your social standing at that place is 0. You should have reacted by laughing along, both times.

this is retarded, and so is most everone in this thread. Pretty much nothing described here is a big deal in any way shape or form. there's no purpose in getting embarrassed or humiliated to such an extent over such stupid antics. Learn from your mistakes, express your dissatisfaction and move on with life OP

>Fuck shit up OP.

it's not even the same you fucking retard, they were making racist jokes

the guy is just getting bullied for being a beta bitch

discrimination my g, if he says he's gay then bim bam boom the lady gets fucked in her vagoo

>deep passionate shiv
Y though?
Isn't it much better to teach your Chad ways to him and gain a lifelong, loyal friend who knows both sides of the coin? A true Alpha leads and inspires, putting weaklings down only proves your own weakness.

t. went from Autist to Chad this way

Nah he could get elected president

Omfg this is why i keep coming back

What do you guys think OP should have done differently? Besides from being enough of a loser that they would do that in the first place

I think he handled it the best way he could. When they do shit like that to clearly make fun of you, the best thing to do is to completely ignore them or simply walk away. You don't want to say or do anything, or react in any way.

>THIS SANTAS SECRET IS THAT HE WON THE LAPLAND LOTTERY, I CAN BUY 10 BIKES A DAY, KEEP IT

kek

Most people are unteachable. You're living in a fantasy world if you think otherwise.

Any stories/examples?

This in truth. She did it twice, in front of other people, and probably would have kept on teasing you until she got a reaction that she could use to embarrass you. It looks even worse considering she's a hot blonde. She can't really use the excuse "b-but it was just a silly joke".

Not so funny when she's causing completely-unnecessary shit for the company just because she personally thinks she's a riot.

>tfw workplace has 50-60 people and only one is a female

That's some forbidden love shit. Serbian girls are godtier. Fuck Kosovo.

True, few are. But the ones who are generally turn out awesome once they learn to get over themselves.
You just need to develop a good eye for potential, it works well.

>instinct

extinct

at least get your dumb shit together

>all that mistletoe thing

I just googled a mistletoe and I get it is a Xmas ornate thing, but is there an inside joke about it? like a word-game or something?

>t. not american

>at least get your dumb shit together
He made a spelling error, otherwise he is on point
If all men died out girls wouldnt be able to carry on, sadly we need alot fewer men to make the world work than we need women so men are getting the short end of the stick and being generally undesired

Well I'm not a faggot so I enjoy women.

I sincerely hope this is not real.

If two people of the opposite gender are caught standing under mistletoe at Christmas time they're supposed to kiss.
It's one of those old tradition things.