FPH

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very nice kek, user

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Lmao
Bet the workers hate lardasses even more than you, working at a donut shop.
Last summer between semesters I worked at a zaxby's in the redneck town my parents moved to after I started uni. If you've never heard of zaxby's it's a fast food chicken place, maybe half a tier above KFC.
Hambeast rednecks LOVE this shit. Every fucking day I had to make 4000-calorie meals for fuckers so fat I don't know how their suspensions didn't snap in the middle of the drivethru. Half of them would come through ordering shit like a large chicken finger plate, 20 wings, two large diet cokes, and a """""healthy salad""""" (more calories than half of our fucking fried chicken meals in just the oily mess of dressing they would put on it) for themselves.
The manager of the store was one of them. She would clock in for the whole day while only stopping in for a total of like two hours, bitch incessantly about nothing, take pride in making her employees cry, and fucking EAT ALL THE FOOD WE WERE COOKING FOR ORDERS without paying or cleaning up after herself.
Everybody that worked there hated their lives by the time they were in for two weeks. People quit non-stop (including myself) to the point that now they don't even have enough people to train the newcomers without getting other franchises to send help. I've found better stuff to do over this coming summer and thank god, because if I went back there I'd fucking end myself.

Can confirm. Worked there for 4 years. Started there about 200 pounds. Was 260 by the time i quit. Got fit after i quit. Dem fat man gains

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I've got one from last year that happened to me. I always thought fph stories sounded a little fabricated, but what happened pretty much solidified what lengths fatties will go to in order to be nasty.

>freshman year of uni, last year
>one of my female friends is roommates with a this massive fucking girl whose obese at around 6,5 in height
>this girl might actually weigh 400 pounds or something holy shit
>roommate and i go to form lounge to play vidya, and she ends up following all the while hitting on me
>tries to sit down on a couch with me
>lolno
>sit down in a chair by myself
>about an hour in she's fully asleep and snoring on her side in the couch next to me
>talking to roomie when suddenly she lets out the fucking loudest disgusting fart i have ever heard in my entire life
>immediately move across the room as roomie and i stare at each other in horror

ive got moar if anyone wants

Plz give us moar

Want. It's going to be a long day at work and I need the distraction.

Shit, never fall for the cheap meals they give you. For my breaks I'd make my own, just putting one of the grilled breasts on wheat bread with tomatoes. It was actually really good.
My only sin was grazing on the little blue cheese crumbles we keep for salads all the time, those things were fucking great.

I want to smell her stinky vagina, then lose an erection because real life women smell much worse than in fantasies.

Best

I need threads like these because I am skinny fat prick who needs confidence boost and wake up call at same time. Thanks anons.

Np, bub

Short story. from hs days:
>on bus ride to some play
>get stuck in seat behind landwhale
>400 pounder
>(she hated me for no reason)
>my friend is in the seat ahead of her
>I start talking about football to him halfway through the ride
>this somehow triggers her
>"oh so you think that since you play one sport you can talk about all sports!?"
>The sport I played was football
>I felt like triggering her obvi
>So then I say, "whatever, get out of my face, beluga whale"
>the Kracken has been released
>the nuclear reactors have activated
>she flips her shit
>she jumps up at my seat
>laughing my ass off
>slide to the window part where my other friend was
>she screams something about thin privilege
>She stands up again
>her weight makes the bus tremble
>she falls directly into one of the metal sides of the bus
>head collides like a car crash
>knocked out
>concussion
>tfw I took down my white whale

>asparagus vs broccoli

Moby Big Ol Bitch

Unrelated, but why has Lyralei, the Windranger dyed her hair (left)?

Holy shit, I finally have a story for you guys. I work at a supermarket (Publix for you guys in the Southern US), specifically in the deli. We had a woman that must've been at least 400 pounds in a motorized scooter and she killed the motor. Sat there slapping the display, complaining that the batteries were full and why was the thing acting up?! Cue me and the managers up front I had to grab to help me out laughing our asses off, unable to explain to this lady that she was over the weight limit on the scooter (it's a very customer service orientated place, can't piss anyone off). She was apparently entirely unaware that her weight was what was stopping the scooter.

>real life women smell much worse than in fantasies.
This.

That was really bad, why would anybody laugh at it? It's too unrealistic

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learn to greentext your story, homo

Love eating this on my bulk

youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA

used to work retail
>beluga whale and frail lil ole lady with cane
>"NO GRANMUH WE NEED TO GET FOOD FIRST"
>Grandma can hardly walk and needed to use the bathroom
>the fuck
>coworker offers to walk her to the restroom so that hambeast can keep shopping.
>hambeast guzzling soda before she responds apparently walking tired her out
>OK BUT >>WEI walk to go get them
>take forever to find one.
>only one scooter
>grandma is getting back now
>coworker walking with her(old lady pace) they are laughing
>pull up and offer the grandma the scooter
>of course she will let grandma have it
>of course she will let grandma
>of course she will
>of course
>she doesn't
>"GRANDMUH THIS ONE IS TOO FAST 4 U YUR GONNA HAFTA WALK
>more soda chugging

Sorry I'm getting angry just typing

Tldr:Hambeast made sweet kind frail ole grandma walk

this

I LOST IT at a pint of mayo. How can fatties even it this shit?

She's eating "healthy" foods and she still can't lose weight? Must be genetics.

She deserved it because she raised her

>Comments are disabled

I wonder why

Too much bad commensterol.

sorry mates but i would fuck that...
shame on me!

I became a fat fuck when I went to college, My parents didn't raise me that way, I was a lean 70kg before then - just lived on takeaways from laziness at college even though I was taught how to cook healthy food.

I am a beacon for fatties, swear to fucking God
>moved down south over summer
>recovering fat
>wake up to approval for handgun permit, grab bf and hop in car
>really excited for that open carry freedom
>50 min drive + 20 mins to gun store after sheriffs office, we forgot to eat breakfast
>refuse fast food, opt to hit up Food Lion
>grab some fruit to hold us over until we get home
>bf wants bacon n eggs so I grab some bacon from the fridge section
>bacon is still in the packaging box, cut open and just sitting there, wonder if stocker just said fuck it or what
>grab one pack head to checkout (thick cut hickory smoked fuckin A)
>wait in express line, moving fast I throw my items on the belt
>Fat woman pulls up behind me, probably about 6' tall and easily in the 300's
>cart is full of the typical shit you'd expect: cola, chips, tv dinners, big stouffers family size bakes, etc
>I only have bananas, apples, diet grape cranberry, and my bacon
>Fatty pushes MY items up the belt, smooshing it into the lady's items in front of me
>before I can express my discontent she picks up MY FUCKING BACON and puts it in a cardboard box on the belt
>mfw pic fucking related
>not only did this bitch break social norms and touch my food
>this bitch stole my bacon
>nah this fat bitch is doing more than that, she is buying ALL the delicious Hickory smoked thick cut bacon
>don't say anything, reach into her box and pick my bacon out
>"NAW NAW NAW YOU PUT THAT BACK RIGHT NOWWWWW"
>cashier stops ringing, lady in front of us turns around
>tell them "she just took my bacon, so I took it back"
>cashier rolls her eyes
> "Mrs. user you can't take customer's items"
> "IZ MINE" she roars
>cashier shakes her head and resumes checking out lady
cont

>fatty is breathing loudly, huffing behind us sounding like a small locomotive
>bf is visibly confused as to what is happening
>fatty tries to grab my bacon again, reflexively slap her hand away
>"You better not touch my food again lady" I say
>I am visibly disgruntled by this point I imagine
>Cashier tells fatty that she should go to the other checkout
>"But wuz ghonna happen to my bacon?"
>Cashier "We'll take care of it don't worry"
>Fatty gives me a curt smile, unloads the belt and swings over to other checkout
>Cashier says "Im sorry sirs, she does this all the time. She likes to buyout certain items in the store."
>Ask her if fatty is mental
>Cashier says "No she isn't mental far as I know she just doesn't respect peoples boundaries I guess"
>look at her one last time before I leave and see her paying with an EBT card

I got my handgun and more importantly had a bacon and egg white on an english muffin.The food you have to fight for somehow taste sweeter. Also happy I never go down by that way so not very likely to ever see that nutjob again.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Also fuck the South

>I am bacon* for fatties

corrected that one for you

>be me
>not you
>work fast food with a friend
(Bojangles for you southern Bros)
>good first job
>working drive through
>see a car pull up, ladies voice
Now here's the thing about the people ordering at fast food restaurant, 99.9% of the time its always a fatty demanding the food. There's no "I'd like a..", or " I'll take a...", its always "give me". Anyways,
>hear her bellow through the microphone
>"give me one of y'all's grilled chicken salads"
>can see her arm hanging out the window, there's no way this thing only wants a salad
>"with extra cheese"
>"and extra chicken"
>fucking knew it
>"also light lettuce"
>all of my wut
>look at buddy
>look at manager
>we're all confused
>she then proceeds to order a large diet Pepsi, and requested extra croutons, crackers, and dressing
>paid with all crinkled bills

All in all it was pushing 1200 calories on what she was probably assuming was a healthy meal, it made my stomach churn thinking about it.

>then we're gonna add in a cup of sugar
no...
>vinegar
I guess you now want to unsweeten it...
>jar of mayonnaise
>Jar. Of. Mayonnaise.
>ForTheLoveOfGodMontresor.jpg

>Enough macaroni to feed a small family

That's a pretty macabre video.

That heavy breathing throughout.
Jesus.

Jesus. If fatty was retarded it would be funny in a pathetic way. If she is sane but has no concern about anything except putting bacon in her face then it's terrifying.

sounds like you ran to a boar variant
youtube.com/watch?v=S8N9J42FJq0
yes its a an anmi about people fighting over half priced bento

>>Cashier says "Im sorry sirs, she does this all the time. She likes to buyout certain items in the store."
>>Ask her if fatty is mental
>>Cashier says "No she isn't mental far as I know she just doesn't respect peoples boundaries I guess"

The fuck? When did this become okay? What's with the resignation that fatty is just going to do that all the time?

We live in a crazy world now.

It's okay user, there's 4 carrots in it so it's healthy.

Same, I think it's because she doesn't look greasy, and dirty. Unlike most lards she seems to take care of her hygiene, or at least it's shopped that way.

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Good on ya for being honest.
I don't approve though.

T H I C C

>posting such a painful joke

kekkles

Heh, in my head you were a tiny cardio bunny.

>We live in a crazy world now.
It's always been like that. They're just fatter now.

Your just jealous because fatties live longer and are more healthy overall.

thank you for your honest Feedback, well it is just a pic... i maybe would not fuck her if she was lain before me... maybe... shame on me

These stories tilt me harder than an animal abuse video. How can a human be so delusional and such a piece of fucking garbage to ruin other peoples days and even small parts of society just to keep munching on processed food as if they were storing mass for the fucking ice age.
I swear to god, people shouldn't be afraid of the hadron colider for creating micro black holes, any of these days one of these landwhales is gonna reach Swartchild's Radius and end the solar system in a black hole of ham and cheese.

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is there any salsa of her?

based dunkin

Maybe muricans do, the rest of the world doesn't have hambulocetus riding scooters as a regular view

Too fake.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_politic

Oh look, body politics is yet another preexisting term that the sjws have taken and redefined to fit their needs.

Another one?

Don't you have anything better to do than hating these people who are just trying to live their lives?

Hahaha nice bait friendo ;)

>those thigh socks

She knows she's a planet.

Having worked in a French-owned and a Russian-owned super market, I can quite honestly say that Europeans will bend over backwards for local customers as much as any other Western service industry. I have been groped and hit on and threatened (I'm a guy, should it matter for some reason) at my job and the best you can do is smile, deescalate the situation and wish them a nice day. Gotta be professional about this shit.

>tfw hit 30lbs loss sunday
>celebrated by going to 4dx star wars and pigging out on nachos
>dad says Im looking "sick" in the face
>ate mcdonalds today
feel like shit bros, I'm still around 25-30lbs off where I should be and he says that I look "sick".

he isnt even fat, he's right around where he should be for a man in his fifties, Im shorter and bigger than him.

someone give me some motivational (You)-age, really need it right now bros

No b8. You sick fucks are ruining this board.

>look I'm a 26 yo virgin, 6'3 and 100 lbs alpha
>make fun of people who eat too much and have genetics that lowers their TDEE

fucking kys

I don't think that was ever the argument. The service industry is the service industry. But only american stores have motorized scooters. I've been in france, greece, italy, america, and germany, and only in america was there scooter. Well, actually, I left the states in 2005, and I don't remember seeing scooters then...

I started at 211lbs, currently at 174 and my target is 145. For the last three days I had to go to three christmas dinners so I fasted all day to seem like a normie there. We're gonna make it, just get back on track now.

What the fuck is it with fast food employee mangers being like the most shitty people alive? I also worked at a zaxby's and my manger was the biggest, most obese, most meanest bitch I've ever met. She basically masturbated to being able to punk and bully high school students around and make them cry and crush them because this was most likely their first job ever. I literally got into a fist fight with her and was arrested for assaulting her because she was screaming at this 19 year old - admittedly sensitive - boy and making him cry because he was confused on how to work the cash register (mind you his first job ever and he had only been there like 2 weeks and the person ordering had some weird custom specifications on a meal he didn't know how to punch in) and she was screaming at him saying he should pay attention after she had "trained" him. God. Sorry to rant at you. But it still pisses me off. I actually liked zaxby's and sadly that was the only one in town and I refuse to ever eat at that one.

>genetics
Whatever you say, 5'4“ fatty

Well she actually has some good stuff though.
Check out those won ton pizza thingys.
Im gonna do that at the christmas party

That pisses me off to the next level.
Now im finally lvl 80

this post gave me america

>things that didnt happen

>muh genetics

Fuck off you fat fuck, go back to the sea.

Never heard of this anime I now have to check it out. Thanks user

not reading this

hmm, id fuck her still. idk why.

I've been watching Sara for years, she's a delight.

>she almost died last year from pneumonia, the hospital luckily enough had one mega bed left which let them tip her over so her lungs would clear

>7000 calorie salad

>she's trying to eat healthier lately, still doesn't realise she's fucking it all up

>makes low carb cookies with sugar free chocolate chips, substitutes flour and sugar for oats and bananas

One of those just opened up by my house. Wut dey serve? Ga fag here

"Healthy" food always annoys me. Was watching Pawn Stars and one of the guys decided to buy "healthy" food for lunch. So they get a footlong turkey sub each with chips. Literally over 1,000 calories.

wow I am weak, I started retching when she emptied the jar of mayo

And she probably boasted to her hamplanet friends about how she ate a healthy and had egg whites for breakfast today.

youtube.com/watch?v=XH7CXtxOflI

>not getting the chicken bacon sandwich w/o sauce
30 grams of protein in that motherfucker, top tier food for lazy assholes like me

someone save this